Songs of the chapter: 

There's No Way (Acoustic) by Tyler Ward & Bailey Rushlow

Movement by Hozier 

Time passes by in a blur on our way back to the city, Theo and I both ready to relax into the remainder of our weekend after a tiring day. Our return trip is filled with an equal flood of thoughts as I had experienced earlier in the day, but this time it is all about another topic- Theo.

I find myself having fallen deep into a spiral of thoughts about him, unable to pull myself out. I think about everything from our moment last week in his apartment, to the way he seamlessly slotted into my life today, to the way that only months ago he was the guy my sister was gushing about. By the time we arrive back in Brooklyn I'm so completely consumed by all the thoughts that I don't notice we've returned.

"Earth to Ella. We're back." Theo waves his hand before my face, breaking me out of my trance.

I realise we've come to a stop in front of my apartment building, the car still running as Theo watches me expectantly.

"Oh, right. Sorry." I take a moment to process my surroundings. Whilst I'm not sure what exactly my direction is right now with anything, I do know that I'm not ready to say goodbye to him just yet. Maybe being around him more will help me figure things out, I reason with myself.

"Did you want to come up for a bit? I've still got to give you back your clothes." I ask him, offering a measly excuse for not wanting him to leave just yet. With the stress of everything with my grandmother slightly more in the background for now, it allows the space for me to think about other things. Like how addicted I have been to Theo's presence.

Just before I had found out about my grandmother's health issues I had reunited with Theo after some distance between us. But the reunion had been intoxicating and now that my mind was free to think about it again, it was like my body had remembered the feeling of it's favourite drug and I was in need of more.

"Yeah, that sounds good. Hopefully the rain will calm down after a couple of minutes." he answers, looking out the windows to the shower that had started to pick up.

Another thing I had been completely oblivious to.

We make our way up to my apartment, the short run to the building door enough to drench us. Once we make our way in, I rush to the radiator eagerly to try and warm us up as soon as possible. Theo makes his way to the bathroom, while I remember to make a short visit to my room to change my soaked top, brushed out my dishevelled hair, and to grab the hoodie that sat atop my dresser.

"Here, before I forget to give this back to you." I say, holding out the hoodie for Theo to take once  I return to the living room to find him seated on the sofa.

Theo lifts his eyes up from where they had been admiring Charlie, who was now standing in front of the couch excitedly receiving head scratches, and recognises the item of clothing.

"Oh thanks." he says, slowly grabbing it from my hands. But before it even leaves my grasp he stops his efforts, looking down at the hoodie for a moment. 

"You know what, keep it. It looked better on you anyways." he tells me, pushing the hoodie back into my arms.

"I couldn't." I insist, shaking my head as I attempt to push it gently into his grasp.

"It's yours. Don't worry about it," he assures me, pulling his hands back, "Plus, it looks like you could use it right now." he suggests, gesturing with his eyes to the goosebumps that were visible on my arms where my sleeves had ridden up. I don't tell him that they had disappeared from my skin once I had changed my top and had only returned once his touch graced my skin for only a short moment. 

"Thank you." I say with a timid smile growing on my face at the gesture, giving into him and quickly shrugging into the warmth of his hoodie. It no longer smelt of him, the scent being replaced by the floral tones of my fabric softener. However, it still somehow felt like I was being enveloped by the presence of Theo.

Once I look to him, I catch his eyes watching intently, lost in some kind of haze, but they quickly break out as he shakes his head and looked in the direction of Charlie who had left his side to return to his bed and quickly fall asleep.

"Well, since that's sorted, I guess I should be heading off." Theo suddenly announces, surprising me with how short he has stayed. 

I hadn't expected him to stay for hours but surely more than ten minutes. I question what had happened in such a short span to time to trigger his decision.

"Oh right, of course. You should go enjoy what remains of your Saturday." I say, lifting myself up off of the couch as he does too and leading him to the front door, somewhat deflated as it feels as though something is crawling under my skin waiting to rip free before he leaves.

"Thank you for all your help today. It means a lot." I tell him, opening up the door and leaning against the door frame so that he may make his way through. He ends up leaning his back against the other side of the door frame, lifting up one leg and bending it against the frame as he stops to speak to me on his way out.

"Anytime Ella." he declares, with a soft boyish grin as his eyes gaze down intently at me.

Whilst often the words that have spilled from Theo's lips in my time knowing him have sounded perfectly manufactured for whatever audience he was beguiling, these words seem to resonate a sense of sincerity to them. Perhaps it is how long and well I feel that I have known him now- a whole day of him helping me sure to reassure my insecurities that he doesn't seem to be going anywhere. And I can't say that I want him to - that is, go anywhere else but right here in front of me - especially in this moment.

I only want him to be closer. I've been slowly giving into it for months now- the absurd pull he has on me, an invisible string tugging us closer together - but somehow it has reached a new insatiable peak. I can feel it as that pull of his deepens it grip on me and drags me across the boundary into a territory I don't know how well I can return to, the knot being tightened on our string. This was always supposed to be temporary; I was supposed to get out all this pent up desire that I had for him and then know one would ever have to know anyways. Then I could move on. That's what he seemed to want as well.

But he was making it harder for me in every single way, and this limit that I had thought up seemed to never be expended.

A million things are running through my mind, things that I want to shout out at him. Things that I need him to hear and to give me some sort of response to.

Instead, I choose to express all those thoughts with actions in what I can only describe as what feels like the slow melody of the piano building up more and more, louder and fiercer, until it erupts into the crescendo.

I spring myself off of the door frame, moving forward and lifting my hands until they have grasped his head and I am tugging it down, so that I can pull him as close to me as possible and that our lips collide in what is an eruption of the emotions that had been brewing within me. He completely embraces my actions, like a puppet following my lead in the most perfectly executed way possible. It is like he is reading my mind, predicting every movement to the millimetre and our bodies perfectly meeting one another's in the moment. 

My hands lift, his head falls into their hold. My lips part, his are expertly aligned with the gaps. My hips rise as I lift up onto my toes to meet his height, his hands are weighting to slot onto the small of my back. 

We pull apart once our breaths become shallow, foreheads resting on each other and heavy breaths mingling. "Stay", I say, my hands still resting on either side of his cheeks.

Seconds creep by torturously as I await his response, our heavy breaths the only sounds that fill the silence while I question what his own actions will say to me.

Finally, he repays my gesture as he springs himself off the door, moving us both backward as he remains in my grasp and joins our lips once again. Once my hands are instinctively lowered to my sides in some sort of effort to balance myself, Theo lifts his own to my face and begins leading us slowly backwards out of the doorway and into my apartment.

Not breaking his attention away from me, one of his hands leave my cheeks as he pushes the door firmly closed behind us. It has barely clicked into place before I find my back being pushed against it. My mouth opens as I gasp, only for Theo to take the opportunity to slide his tongue past my lips. A groan involuntarily spills from my lips as the hand that had been remaining on my face simultaneously begins its decent down my body, running along the contours of my body until its reaches my own hand. His other hand now joins with my counterpart, weaving our fingers together in a tight grasp as they are dragged up against the door above my head.

His lips now leave mine so that they can grace the delicate skin on my neck, with my fingers gripping tightly on his in response and my head falling back onto the door. However, as he eventually loosens his grip and lets our hands fall slowly down our bodies to our sides again, I soon find myself burying my face in the crook of his own neck as his hands wander all over me.

It doesn't take long before I am reaching for the bottom of his hoodie, eager to remove the layers that remain between us and for the feeling of his skin to be under my fingertips. I take the fabric in my grasp and begin to pull it above his head but find it stopping against my will as it reaches the shape of his head. We stop for a moment having been caught up in the chaotic rush of the last few minutes, somehow feeling like childish teenagers doing this for the first time. Once I've slowed down, I am finally about to guide the rest of the hoodie over his head, carelessly discarding of it on my apartment floor.

It is Theo's turn to return the favour, although he does it far more effortlessly of course, with his own hoodie peeled off of me and soon to be dangling over my sofa with no challenge. He wastes no time in return his lips to mine, letting his hands roam over my freshly exposed skin as only my bra remains on the top of my body.

"Where's Jess?" Theo asks, taking the briefest of moments to catch his breath. This is shortly followed though with those warm breaths being trapped against my skin as his lips make their way down my neck, working centimetre by centimetre down my skin.

"Working. She won't finish until the morning." I allow the words to spill out of my lips, releasing the grasp my teeth have on my lower lip just long enough to do so and taking as little time as necessary away from what is at the forefront of my attention at this moment.

This information allows Theo to continue freely. However, it's my moment to briefly worry about  who might be in the apartment as I remember a certain three-legged dog sleeping in the corner. I had never had to worry about him being nearby during intimate moments because, well, there hadn't really been any since I got him. The few moments that had occurred with Theo tended to be at his apartment, and if anything did happen here it was relatively brief. But he's definitely here and I definitely feel weird about it. 

Why doesn't anyone ever tell you about what you're meant to do with your pet in these moments?

Somehow between having Theo's lips and hands roam over my body and manoeuvring ourselves through my living room, I make sure to quickly grab one of the bones from his treat jar and throw it in his direction, the treat clattering to the ground as it rolls to an undisturbed Charlie who lifts open one eye to look at it for a moment before returning to sleep. 

We finally make it my bedroom where I firmly close the door to make sure no intruders make their way in. I take a moment when doing this, my back to Theo and keeping my hand resting on the flat surface as I take a deep breath and grasp what is happening right now. The voice in my mind persists with its worries of whether I'll do things wrong after so long, whether I should even be doing anything with Theo that could complicate things and take us into unknown territory. However, that voice is weakened by the insatiable need I have to have Theo as close to me as possible. I can hear my heartbeat pulsating through my body, its accelerated pace feeling as though it is pounding against my rib cage trying to break free.

Only last week I had questioned whether Theo was worth the anxiety of taking the next step after all this time. But, what else could he be but worthy after all he has done for me? How could I not trust him after watching him rush to my side today to help me, spending the whole day talking and helping my grandmother for nothing in return? Being there for me, time after time it seemed. 

Before I can get too lost in my thoughts though, the soft linger of Theo's touch on my neck breaks me out of my reverie as he brushes the hairs off of my left shoulder, exposing the skin on my neck to the cool air before he blankets it with his lips. By instinct, I somehow find my hands wandering backwards until they are met with Theo's and our fingers intertwine.

The pace has changed now as we find ourselves in the cosy confines of my bedroom. Only the light from my bedside lamp illuminates the room as we stand there, back to chest, just the two of us. It feels more real, like we both know the significance of this moment.

Theo lets go of my hands as he moves his to run them over my hips. I try my best to ignore that they are roaming over the obvious shapes of my hip dips. I find myself wanting to place my hands over his and lead them away but I don't even have the chance to keep up as they move over the soft surface of my stomach before arriving at the top of my jeans. His index finger torturously runs along the top of them, soon taking a brief peek under the surface as my body reactively moves back into his. He gets the message, quickly undoing the button and teasingly dragging the zipper slowly down.

He takes his time, grabbing the material that rests on each of my hips, tugging it down gently and bending down so that each patch of skin that is exposed to the open air is shortly blanketed with the touch of his lips. That is, until all that remains is a pool of fabric at my ankles, which he promptly manoeuvres off.

Lifting himself back up, he grabs my hips and twists me around so that my eyes are staring right at his chest. Still holding onto me, he eases me backwards until the edge of the bed is hitting the back of my legs, at which point Theo's hands gently guide me down to sit on it. He takes the chance to kick off his shoes and socks, undoing the tie of his pants and pulling them swiftly down before carelessly throwing them into a corner of the room to balance the playing field again and eagerly return his attention to me.

Theo leans down, placing a hand on either side of my body to hold himself above me as our lips rejoin. His body begins moving forward, guiding mine backwards and crawling further onto the mattress, until I can feel my pillows against the bare skin of my lower back. With his lips still on mine, his body eases my torso down and I sink onto the bed with my hair fanning across the surface of the pillows.

He places a hand on either side of my body, looming over me as he searches for his next target. I don't give him a chance to consider though, as my hands eagerly take his face into my grasp and pull his mouth back down onto mine. My fingers playfully roam through the soft tresses of his unstyled hair today, which I know all too well makes him melt into my touch, especially as I tease the shorts hairs at the nape of his neck. 

His teeth grasp my bottom lip in response, pulling down and only letting go so that they may eventually roam down my neck, moving lower and lower, blanketing my skin. Soon they rest in the valley of my cleavage, his fingers simultaneously running under the fabric of my t-shirt bra searching for the clasp. It is quickly undone, in an all too effortless manner, with Theo gently easing the straps down my shoulders so that every hair on my skin is sent standing up straight.

Once they are dragged all the way down to my fingers, he discards of it off the side of the bed before returning returning both his hands to the sides of my body. He pushes himself down, placing his lips behind my ear before grasping my ear lobe and pulling down gently. Next on the path, his lips are lowered to the pool of skin between my neck and clavicle before his tongue slightly peeks out to run along the skin stretched across the bone. Centimetre by centimetre, from my chest to my torso to my hips, his lips imprint against my skin until they reach the inside of my thighs and his face disappears between my legs, my incredibly seductive boyleg underwear disposed of quickly.

My fingers hold tightly onto his locks of hair as the pressure builds within me with each touch, my hips buckling forward involuntarily ... until he frustratingly pulls his lips away to trail their way back up to mine. It is only for a moment though that they remain there, as he introduces a small distance between our faces to look down at me. He lifts a hand, rubbing his thumb across my lower lip as he seems to consider something.

"We can stop now if you're not ready." he tells me, leaning his forehead against mine as he intently watches my lips awaiting my answer.

I shake my head, certain of it.

"I'm ready."

"Are you sure?" he asks me slowly, giving me the time to reconsider. But I don't.

"Certain." I assure him, using his own words from this morning. I cover his mouth with my own, preventing any further concerns from being voiced and telling him everything I need to say with my lips. And so, his hands dispose of the final item of clothing that remains between us and the necessary precautions are made before I wrap my legs around his hips, pulling him closer until he takes the lead and closes any gap that lingered between us, physical and emotional. My fingers dig into the skin of his shoulders, keeping my grasp on him and on reality.

Moonlight spills across each surface of the room as bit by bit I unravel more beneath Theo, as does he. Our lips, our breaths, our hands would explore every inch of each other's bodies until, not for the first time but on a whole new level, I am completely consumed by Theo Harrington.

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Author's Note: 

So... that happened 👀

The chapter which has been saved as "The Chapter" in my drafts for a while now is finally here for you to enjoy. Hope you did!

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