Alicia’s P.O.V

Ugh, I shouldn’t have yelled at her. Shawn’s gonna hate me. He looked so petrified. I should probably go apologize to him. I mean ONLY Shawn. I’m not apologizing to his bitch of a girl friend. I paced back and forth through my room, until I could build up the strength to go to his room and apologize. Then I heard a knock on the door. I checked through the peephole, and saw Shawn pacing back and forth as well. Was he here to yell at me? I hesitantly opened the door prepared to get scolded.

“Shawn? What are you doing here?” I asked worriedly. He didn’t seem angry, if anything, he looked apologetic.

“I’m sorry. I know it’s late, but do you wanna go on a walk?” He asked hesitantly. His hands were in his pockets, and his shoulders were raised. He half smiled at me. I felt relieved that he didn’t seem mad at me. I should probably still apologize though. He must have been in an uncomfortable position. After I think about it, what if he wanted to sing with Julie instead of me? Damnit Alicia, you’re so selfish. You’re definitely apologizing now. He interrupted my thoughts, “I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”

“Oh! No not at all. I’d like to go on a walk.” I closed the door and followed him out.

“Where’s Julie?” I asked politely. It took a lot of my power to ask him without grimacing.

“She went home to Canada.”aww..shit. I didn’t mean to make her leave, but I was kinda glad she did. We were finally outside of the hotel. We were still in San Francisco, so we wanted to go to the pier. It was quiet for a while. I guess we were both trying to figure out what to say.

“Hey, so about tonight-” Shawn started apologetically.

“I’m sorry” We admitted in unison. We looked at each other and laughed.

“Wait..let me start.” I gulped, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable when I yelled at your girlfriend. I’m sorry for putting you in that kind of position.To be honest, I’m not sorry for what I said to her, but I am sorry towards you. I should’ve put you into consideration before I yelled her. If you would rather sing with her then go-”

“No!” He interrupted, “Like you said, we worked hard on this duet. I’d rather we sang together. I wanted to apologize for Julie’s actions. She can get kinda possessive, and bitchy sometimes. There’s really not much I can do about it besides apologizing.”

“It’s okay. Let’s just put that behind us. How long have you guys been together?” I asked curiously.

“Almost two years. We started dating in the 10th grade. She was head cheerleader, and if I remember correctly, she was the one who approached me. I guess in the moment, it felt great because the head cheerleader wanted me.” He half smiled, “but when I started to become more famous online, she started to get more possessive, and it started to feel as if she was only with me for the popularity rather than for me.” There was complete silence. I was at a loss for words, because I knew there was nothing I could say to comfort him right now.

“Are you cold?” He changed the subject. I guess my chattering teeth didn’t hide much.

“No no. I’m okay” I reassured him. He started to remove his jacket, and I knew what was going to happen next.

“Wear it.” He ordered as he held it out in his hand.

“No! It’s okay. You wear it! What if you get cold? I’m not cold,” Even I could detect the lie in my voice. I was freezing! Why didn’t I get a jacket before I left?! Shawn raised his hand and pressed it against my cheek. His hand was soft, and warm. I could feel the blood rush into my cheeks. My head naturally leaned into his hand. I closed my eyes and smiled to myself, then I realized where I was and what I was doing.

“You’re lying,” he accused,“ Your face is completely frozen,”

I finally gave in and wore his jacket. It was just a normal hoodie. It smelled just like him. The sleeves went past my hands, and the bottom of the hoodie went past my waist. I put my face in my arm and breathed in his scent. Oh shit, Did I really just do that?

“Did you just smell my jacket?” He snickered, “Like what you smell?”

“Uhh..I just wanted to make sure that..it..didn’t..smell bad! I wouldn’t want to wear a jacket that smells bad..uhh..ewww..” I laughed. My laugh was fading into an awkward chuckle.

“Suuure..” He just dropped the topic. Our walk turned silent again. I admired the waters. The pier was empty, and it seemed like we were the only ones here. The breeze from the waters smelled nice. I was in this beautiful place, but all I could really think about was a question that had been gnawing at me.I just had to ask. I knew it wasn’t my place to butt in, but the curiosity decided to take over.

“Why are you still with her?” I didn’t mean to pry, but I was honestly curious, “I mean, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to..I mean..”

A guy as nice as Shawn deserves way better than Julie. Someone who loves him for him, and someone who understands him, and can sing with him, and can support him and motivate him. Maybe someone like me.I just had an epiphany. I think I can finally admit it to myself. I like Shawn Mendes.That would explain all the jealousy, and all the feelings, and all my physical responses to him. My body wants him too! I don’t mean sexually (A/N: she totally does) ,or maybe just a little bit anywho, that was why the performance felt so natural, and that was why I leaned into his hand, and that was why that hug was so amazing. I like Shawn Mendes. Oops, I forgot he was talking.

“We’ve been together for so long. It’s hard to remember a time when we weren’t together. She wasn’t always like this, at least, from what I remember. My friends always told me bad things about her, but I never would have thought they were true.” His voice faded. It probably brought back some unwanted memories.

“That’s not healthy, Shawn. You’re only with her, because you feel like you have to be with her. Just because it’s been so long doesn’t mean you have to stay with her. Shawn, you deserve better!” I declared. This was none of my business. I had no right to pry into this, but of course my foot gets shoved in my freaking mouth, and I blurt out everything I’m thinking.

He was silent.

“I shouldn’t have said anything,” I apologized, “We should be heading back. It’s really late, and we have to leave for Los Angeles tomorrow morning.”

I started walking in the opposite direction, but he stopped me. Shawn grabbed my shoulder and turned me around.

“When you said that I deserved better, better as in who?” He walked closer to me. I stepped backwards until my back hit a railing and there was no where else to go. His hands were on both sides of me, so I was trapped.  This was wrong. No matter how much I wanted it to happen, I couldn’t let it. Then why wasn’t I stopping him? As his face started to lean in closer, I also started to lean in. I could feel his breath on the outside of my lips, and my eyes were slowly drooping closed. I was going to give into him.

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Author’s Note: Shit just got real. Uh oh. THINGS ARE GETTING STEEAMMYYY OOOHHH

I really just wanna post every chapter that I have done, but that's no fun :)