The trip back into Meliodas's mind wasn't pleasant to say the very least. Not when Zeldris knew all of the happy memories were likely behind him if the scene he saw right before being pulled out of his little brother's mind had anything to say. And now he had his other sibling here to experience those moments with him. Lovely. Although perhaps there would still be some more wholesome moments ahead to give him reprieve. After all, most of the previous memories had been out of order. He could only hope, because otherwise he wouldn't have had the strength to go to that ninth door. He was too worried by what he would see.

And he was right to be. 

He knew exactly when this took place. It was after the last dreadful one. Time blurred a lot for Zeldris after weeks of isolation, but he was confident to say it was a month after the last...  Because after all, that was about the time the paperwork for such a thing would need to be processed.

"Are you kidding me, Esta?! No way in purgatory am I letting this happen! Absolutely not!"

"B-But Zel-"

"NO, Meliodas! It's too dangerous and I'm appalled that your other brother even considered allowing this!"

"You're being overdramatic, Zeldris. It's just a temporary replacement so you can focus on your other duties."

"Yeah, a replacement on the WAR FRONT! He's never been in battle before Estarossa! What's the matter with you for approving this!?"

"Zel please, I've been training for this for a long time. Besides, you're pushing yourself too hard, let me do this for you."

"NO!"

"Please just list-"

"Enough Mel, let me handle this."

The boy sighed as he was interrupted for the millionth time, pushed to the sidelines about a decision very much concerning him.

"You've been training him since he was a boy, and he's old enough now to put that effort into something useful. If there are complications, we can always wave the request down the line, but for now you need to allow him to do this."

Estarossa was incredibly calm about this situation, and normally the ravennete wouldn't have been so emotional to contrast, but he wasn't exactly in the best shape in the moment. And to add to his frantic state, he kept having a gut feeling like something was going to go wrong. Not that he could communicate that very clearly at the moment. Honestly, looking back on this, there was a lot that Zeldris had forgotten in the fatigue that had plagued him.  

"He's only thirteen!"

"A-Actually I'm-"

"I said to let me handle this, Meli."

The boy's eyes dropped to the floor as he sighed in annoyance, several frustrated and worried thoughts running through his head that the demon wished he had been privy to sooner. 

"What if something happens to him!?"

"It won't be much different to what will happen to him if we lose, and you aren't exactly in the best shape to lead at the moment."

"I'm doing the best I can!"

"I know that, but you're exhausted and overworked. Your best isn't good enough right now."

"Oh but sending a thirteen-year-old to replace me as Executioner will make it better!?"

"No, sending our little brother Meliodas, will make it better. He's excelled at every lesson you've given him, and he's learned from the very person he will TEMPORARILY replace. I understand your concern, but you just have to trust that this will work."

He sighed; all of the yelling took too much out of him. Now all that he had left was exhaustion as he realized that his elder wasn't going to cave on the matter.

"Fine. But as soon as I'm ready to come back, he's out of there, do you understand me?"

Meliodas's eyes lit up as a smile crossed his face, soon followed by a tight hug as he tackled his brother.

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you! I won't make you regret this! Now go get some sleep, okay? Everything will be fine Zeldy!"

At the time, the ravennete hadn't noticed anything odd about the sudden change in mood. After all, he hadn't paid enough attention to realize that this cheerfulness was anything different from how the blond normally acted. However, seeing it now, and hearing the thoughts that came next as the boy ran off to prepare for battle in the armory, Zeldris realized that this moment was another key to why the boy left. And it was once again, his fault.

They trust me! They're actually going to trust me with this! I can't remember the last time Zeldy's actually trusted me with a responsibility! I won't let them down! I am going to make them proud of me!

The memory looped as the three who were watching remained silent for a moment. One, out of respect, while for the other two it was because of their own feelings and thoughts of regret. Until finally, it turned to loop a second time and snapped the brother's out of their dazes.

"I never should have let him go. You were right. I always thought you coddled him far too much, but looking back at this... I can't believe how many times I put him in danger for the sake of duty and reputation. I never gave any of his ideas the time of day unless I thought they would benefit the realm. I..."

He went to say more, but stopped himself as it seemed the emotion was just too much to share. A sentiment Zeldris understood well as he felt the same way at the moment, but for the opposite reason.

I never stopped treating him like a child. I took on far more than one person should ever carry, and then lashed out from the strain of it instead of sharing the load with someone who was very capable of helping me balance the weight of it. I can't imagine how utterly humiliating and hopeless it must have felt to have all of this potential and have no one actually trust you to use it. You've always been so brilliant, and talented, Meliodas. But I never trusted you enough to show you I thought so. I treated you like a helpless child your whole youth, and then an enemy as you entered adulthood. I'm... so, so, sorry. 

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The next few memories seemed to be a recurring theme as they all held moments on the battlefield with Meliodas leading the troops with grace and poise that impressed Zeldris quite a bit. He had always wondered why the demons seemed to rally better with his brother, and why those insufferable Seven Deadly Sins had been so loyal to him, but seeing the boy in action instantly cleared up any of those questions. His strategies were brilliant, even though many weren't traditional to the demonic way of fighting, and he was fiercely dedicated to each member of his group as he even went so far as to remember each name of the members he led in each memory. (Something Zeldris had definitely not made the effort to do.) 

Though even with the ravennete's awe over the blond's skill, and his previous revelation about being too protective and not trusting his brother enough, he still couldn't help the waves of nervousness that passed through him as he watched each battle against the goddesses play out. Although this time, for good reason as he knew what was to come... 

It seemed like number eight was the unlucky number when it came to the doors. Because as the group came up to door number sixteen (seven after the outburst he had towards Meliodas) his fears were confirmed as he watched what he hoped he wouldn't have to. At the time, he thought this was the worst moment he'd ever face in his life. After three short months after doing splendid work on the battlefield, Zeldris had gotten a message from a soldier saying Meliodas had been wounded in battle and had gone MIA after. And this lovely memory to come... was playing the exact moment that happened.

To the untrained eye, the chaotic memory playing would've been impossible to follow. With dozens of individual fights all happening at once in the crowd, and the smoke and dust blurring the moment even further as fires blazed brightly near several of those battles, many would give up trying to find a specific person or moment among the many others all competing for the eye's attention. But not Zeldris. He cared too much about what was to come, and he had seen many battles himself play out similarly enough for the sight to seem normal to him. So, with practiced ease, it took merely a minute for him to spot the blond amidst the wreckage. Although, that was partly due to the fact that the boy's fighting was more attention-grabbing to begin with. 

Dodge, block, slice. Dodge, block, slice. The same pattern continued flawlessly as blood covered Meliodas. Although none of it was his own. He seemed different; focused, confident, serious. He was determined to end this fight as the victor. 

He was taking down goddesses by the dozen as they worked feverishly to kill the Executioner leading the other demons into battle. All with poise and practice as he barely broke a sweat from the strain. And for a brief moment, Zeldris felt pride swell up in him at seeing his little brother use all of the techniques he himself had taught the child over the years. But that pride also came with the confusion of why this was the moment someone had managed to take down the demon. Because if it weren't for the placement of the battle, the ravennete wouldn't had been able to tell that this was the moment his little brother went MIA at all. 

Damn it! They just keep coming! Ugh, I can't believe I was so stupid! Zeldris was right not to trust me with this! I led the others right into an ambush! My brother never would've made this mistake. He should be the one leading these demons!

His panicked thoughts were completely unlike the blond's normal confidence, and even as he moved in the fight, none of his attacks or mannerisms showed the inner struggle he was facing. Although, that only added to some of the ravennete's... concerns. 

How could he think that? He's doing great! Even if he did lead the others into an ambush, he's handling this with impressive composure! I couldn't have done any better myself. Besides, from the looks of it he hasn't been injured at all, which holds his namesake up well. If anything, this moment would be a perfect opportunity to lower goddess morale after seeing his strength. So why is he so upset?

Zeldris didn't understand at all. Meliodas's concerns seemed unfit for his current progress. But perhaps that was another reason the two hadn't seen eye-to-eye in things towards the end... because the boy's concerns weren't over his own health or pride, they were over the other demons not doing nearly as well in the war raging on. 

This is all my fault! They're dying because of ME! I promised I would protect them, I promised they would get to go home!

As soon as the thought played in the memory, it was clear exactly how the demon had been injured in battle. Sure, in his own endeavors versus the goddesses attacking him, he was doing incredibly well! But he was starting to take on the other's enemies as well. He was starting to do something definitely not at all demon but oh so clearly Meliodas... He started protecting his troops. 

Zeldris lost count of how many men must have been saved by his brother. A dozen, at least! But for every death the blond managed to prevent, the more dangerous the stunts he had to pull to ensure it. Suddenly all of the training Zeldris had taught him went out the door as his techniques fell to pure desperation. He was getting overwhelmed trying to save the others, and it was going to catch up to him in a moment that his brothers both desperately didn't want to see. 

A goddess showed up to the scene that made both of the commandments blood boil in anger. Ludociel. A monster in the war that Zeldris and Estarossa didn't think they could hate any more than they already did. But they were surely mistaken as the man pointed an ark right at the unassuming blond who took it full force before crumbling to the ground. All while all of the demons he just saved acted in a much more natural way for their kind, regardless of the efforts the young demon had just made for them...

they left him behind. 

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