Sooji wakes up with a stiff neck and a sore hand. "Aarrgh...", she grunted. She opens her eyes and looks around. Where is she?? It's not her room. The bed is bigger. And it smells like Shihyun. She sits up straight suddenly when she realized that she was sleeping on Shihyun's bed. What happened last night?? She's still fully clothed, so that means nothing really happened.
She tried to remember what happened last night. She took Shihyun's home. And stared at his sleeping face. Then, she must be fell asleep sitting at the floor, head on his bed. But now she is in bed. With no Shihyun insight.
"You're awake...", Shihyun's voice startled her.
"Oh...yeah...", shihyun looks too good for someone who supposed to have a hangover. "You're not hangover...", she stated.
"I did...", he smiles. "But the aspirin I take an hour ago already kick in and I have my black coffee..."
"What time is it?", Sooji takes her phone from the bedside table.
"9 am..."
"Argh...", Sooji just realizes her hands feel numb. It must be because she used her hand as a pillow all night.
"Are you okay?", Shihyun is worried. "You fell asleep sitting at the floor, you looked so uncomfortable so..I picked you up...". That explains how she ended up in his bed.
"I am fine...just remember that I have practice this afternoon...", she lied.
"I'll drive you...but now..let's eat first...I have made a breakfast..."
"Wait...we left your car in Sejoo's restaurant..."
"I already asked someone to bring it back here.."
"Oh..."
"Come on...", he walks to the kitchen and Sooji follows behind him.
He made tuna sandwiches. They sat in silence. Sooji massages her hand under the table. "Are you okay?", Shihyun worried when Sooji didn't touch her food. "Why don't you eat..."
"Oh..I am fine...", she takes a bite of the sandwich. "Hmmm..you're good..."
Shihyun smiled proudly. "I am...", Shihyun gets up to take something from the fridge. He's back with a bottle of drink and gives it to her. "Drink this.."
"What is it?", she observed the weird drink.
"Vitamin...you looked little pale...", his grandma send a lot of that vitamin to him.
"Auch...", she flinched when she tried to open that bottle. Stupid hand. Her numb hands now cramps. Perfect. Shihyun snatched her hand to massages it before she could hide it under the table. "You don't need to do that anymore..", she lied. That stupid habit of him that she missed the most. Massaging her hand. It reminds her of the old Shihyun. The one that used to care about her.
She tried to pull her hand from him, but Shihyun didn't want to let go. He won't make mistakes anymore. He won't let her go, he won't let her run away. He'll hold onto her as long as he could. "Suussh..", he tried to make her stop wriggle. "I told you before...I don't need to do this...but I want to..okay?"
Sooji just nodded. She feels like the warmth from his hand traveled through her whole body. He's still really good at this. Even after six years. And it made her wonder, did he do it to someone else? Did he massage Taehee hands too?
"Am I doing it wrong?", Shihyun suddenly asked.
"Huh?"
"You look uncomfortable..."
"No...why?"
Shihyun poked her forehead. "You frown like you've been solving math equation.."
"Oh...", she didn't even realize that.
"What were you thinking...."
"I just wonder...how can you still so good at this even after six years...then I just realized that how stupid it is to think that I am the only one who've been receiving this special treatment...", she laughed for a second before she realized that she just babbling. And now she really wants to slap herself.
Shihyun chuckled. "I called this special treatment as...Sooji's special care...so it's only for Sooji .."
"Are you trying to seduce me now, Kwon shihyun?", she asked playfully.
"Is it working? If it is...then yes...", they stare at each other. It feels like six years ago. When they walk in the thin line between friends and lovers but ended up with neither of both. Sooji was the first one who looked away.
Shihyun continued to massage her hand. He traced every line in her palm and raving it like it was the most beautiful thing. Then he stopped when he saw a faded scar in her wrist. His face turned pale.
Sooji knows why he suddenly stopped. So she pulled her hand away. Thst scar was always a reminder for her that she was just a broken piece. A reminder of how ugly her past was. "I should go...", she grabbed her purse in the living room and go. She practically runs away from him.
Now she's standing in the street out of breath. Did she just run down here through the stairs without even realizing it? How stupid she was, thinking that it might still be a hope for both of them. She's broken. Nobody will want her when they know that she's just pieces that cant be fixed. She can still remember clearly how pale his face was when he saw her scar. Did he feel terrified? Or disgusted? Or pity? None of them were good answers. She sighed. She should go to practice now. She really wants to bail the practice for today but the concert will be held just in few days. She should practice more.
Finally, a cab pulled over, Sooji opened the door but someone slammed the door shut before she even entered it.
"GO!!", he shouts to the cab driver.
"What are you doing??", Sooji shocked with Shihyun sudden appearance.
"Why are you ran away?!", he's mad.
She's looking at him dumbfounded. Why would he be mad at her? "I...", then suddenly her phone is ringing. It's Minwoo. "Sorry...I should pick it up..."
"Hello..."
"Sooji ah...how are you?"
"Huh? I am fine...why?"
"Nothing...just worried...you left your cello in my car..."
"Oh...yes I forget that...can you bring it to the studio today?"
"Sure...want me to pick you up?"
"Mmm..."
"You're at your apartment right?"
"I....I have an errand to run..no need to pick me up..."
"Okay..see you at the practice then..."
"Why didn't you tell him that you're with me?", Shihyun asked right after she hangs up the phone.
"Huh?", how did he know what she was talking with Minwoo? Then she realized that she pushed the loudspeaker button. How stupid. "I...umm..I just didn't want him to think that there's something more than it actually was..."
"Why? Do you like him?", he asked her coldly.
Suddenly Sooji feels like she had enough. "It's none of your business either I do or don't!", she's tired. Tired of this roller coaster of emotion.
Shihyun is taken aback with her response. "I am sorry...."
Sooji turned around tried to hail another cab.
"Let me drive you..."
Sooji turned to face him. "I've been by myself for so long...I am finally used to that...now, please.. don't make me start to depend on you..because if that's happened...I am not sure I can let you go again without letting myself gone too..."
After saying that, she walked away. And Shihyun didn't follow her. She should feel glad because he listens to her. Like he used to. But it chipped away another piece of her that still hopes this time he'll hold on to her. That he'll fight for her to stay. But maybe that's the problem, she never worth the fight.
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Ps : you might be confused with Sooji's behavior, I just wanted to say that she has trust issues before, then after everything she's been through, it only gets worse. Now it added with a lot of insecurities. Please be patient with her. I still try to figure out how to fix her..😅
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