i got carried away making these-
.
Crafty7: I just had a long talk with Spicy and Alex about hitting and now they are yelling “it’s my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence” before hitting each other.
.
*Yessoan and Meester are in Paris*
Yessoan: I'm...moved. I...I don't know what it is I'm feeling right now. I feel...destiny?
Meester Tweester: But...
Yessoan: I don't know what it is. I feel like... I just never thought I'd see it with my own two eyes. And here it is. It's just there. It's right in front of me, and...
Meester Tweester: This is what you wanted to see? The bridge from Inception?
Yessoan: Yeah.
Meester Tweester: But the Eiffel Tower is right behind us...
Yessoan: Yeah, but this is the bridge FROM INCEPTION.
Meester Tweester: Okay, alright.
.
alexlion0511: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.
fryUaj: Spear.
alexlion0511: BLOCKED.
.
TheMightyMidge: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.
some_nerd: Midge, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.
.
Joseph Howard: Don’t say a word.
Spicyman33: Fergalicious.
Joseph Howard: Spicy, I said no words.
Spicyman33: Oh, I see how it works. Two weeks ago, we’re playing Scrabble, it’s not a word, now suddenly it IS a word because it’s convenient for you!
.
*The Squad is playing Minecraft together*
AN9K: Ooh, a village! You know what that means!
Spicyman33: Hostile takeover?
alexlion0511: Genocide?
Joseph Howard: Steal everything!
AN9K: No, I meant-
Meester Tweester: I didn’t know we would fight the ender dragon this early! A village worth of beds isn’t enough!
Crafty7: WHAT ARE WE EVEN DOING?!?!
AN9K: …I was going to say move into the village and become the mayors…
Meester Tweester: Ohhhh! That sounds like a better idea.
Crafty7: Agreed.
.
Midnight Light: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?
Juhmatok: *sighs*
Juhmatok: I killed a man.
.
fryUaj: You’re drunk.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: Correction: drinking. Present tense. Grammar, Fry.
.
Spicyman33: Your smug self-assuredness is revolting.
Joseph Howard: I think we need to validate self confidence more, lest you end up angry at others for having even a sliver of it. I've done nothing wrong and I have a heart of gold.
Crafty7: I think this message is extremely valid, but also Jo-Ho has implied that he wants to set off the Yellowstone supervolcano, so what's the truth?
Joseph Howard: I want to set it off.
.
Meester Tweester: Hey guys, I’m making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap, so wake me up in 5 minutes to flip them over.
*5 minutes later*
AN9K: MT, it’s been 5 minutes, time to flip your sticks.
Meester Tweester: snnnzzzz...
AN9K: MEESTER YOUR STICKS!
.
Crafty7: Well, remember when Spiky made a romantic dinner for me?
Joseph Howard: Crafty, he microwaved you a pizza.
.
Joseph Howard: How is the most beautiful person in the world?
AN9K: *blushing* I—
Juhmatok, butting into the conversation: Midnight is perfect, thanks for asking.
.
xXBombs_AwayXx: Look Alex, it's the third time this week you've had a mental breakdown... and it's Monday.
.
QwerbyKing: Guess what number I’m thinking of.
GreenTree: 420?
QwerbyKing: No, that’s really immature of you. Someone else guess, and please take this seriously.
Mike Ramsay: 69.
QwerbyKing: Yeah, it was 69...
.
xXBombs_AwayXx: Then either Sonic is a god or could kill god, and I do not care if there is a difference.
TheMightyMidge: Get your hand off my shield!
Juhmatok: There's like a million other shields.
TheMightyMidge: Take that one, it has a flower on it. Girls like flowers.
Juhmatok: *hits Midge with the shield* Oops! Now this one has blood on it.
.
some_nerd: Play to your strengths.
taopwnh6427: I haven’t got any!
.
Kidnapper: I have one of your friends.
Tantusar: Which one? I have seven.
Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up.
Tantusar: Which one? I have seven.
Spicyman33, distantly: HEY!!!
.
QwerbyKing: I should've left you on that street corner where you were standing...
Mike Ramsay: But ya' didn't!
.
Tantusar: Stressed.
Juhmatok: Depressed.
TheMightyMidge: Possessed.
.
*Alex and Spicy are fighting*
Joseph Howard, taking aspirin: I have a headache! Can you guys just be cool?!
*Alex and Spicy start fighting while wearing sunglasses and riding skateboards*
.
Yessoan: "Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."
Midnight Light: ...
Midnight Light: What a stupid fucking quote.
Midnight Light: I'm killing way more than two people, idiot.
.
alexlion0511: *watching his house burn down*
alexlion0511:
alexlion0511: *starts filming* Waddup, guys, welcome to my vlog, today's topic: how to get away with accidentally committing arson because you forgot Spaghetti O's cans are metal and thus non-microwavable! Step one: deny everything.
.
*while waiting outside the principal’s office*
TheMightyMidge: What are you in for?
Tak Ajnin: Oh, they just want to know if it’s cool if I miss my classes tomorrow to run sound and lights for a presentation in the auditorium. What about you?
TheMightyMidge: I stabbed a kid with a screwdriver.
Tak Ajnin:
Tak Ajnin:
Tak Ajnin: We live very different lives.
TheMightyMidge: Yes we do.
.
fryUaj: Hey! Wanna hear a joke?
alexlion0511: Sure.
fryUaj: Your life!
alexlion0511: Actually, my life isn’t a joke, jokes have meaning.
fryUaj: Alex no.
.
Meester Tweester: I have one brain cell and it bounces around in my skull like a windows screen saver.
Meester Tweester: When it hits a corner perfect, I’m allowed one good idea.
.
*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*
Joseph Howard: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
Everyone:
AN9K: ...I did. I broke-
Joseph Howard: No. No you didn't. Spicy?
Spicyman33: Don't look at me. Look at Crafty.
Crafty7: What?! I didn't break it.
Spicyman33: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Crafty7: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
Spicyman33: Suspicious.
Crafty7: No, it's not!
Tantusar: If it matters, probably not, but Satomi was the last one to use it.
Hazel Cricket: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Tantusar: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Hazel Cricket: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, THOMAS!
AN9K: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Joseph.
Joseph Howard: No! Who broke it!?
Everyone:
some_nerd: Joseph... Alex's been awfully quiet.
alexlion0511: REALLY?!
*Everyone starts arguing*
Joseph Howard, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.
Joseph Howard: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Joseph Howard:
Joseph Howard: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
.
xXBombs_AwayXx: What can therapy do for me that screaming in my car for 30 minutes can’t?
.
Joseph Howard: The best part of an oreo is the cookie part, not the frosting. Deal with it.
Tak Ajnin: Darkness without light is an abyss. Light without darkness is blinding. You cannot have a coin with one side.
Spicyman33: YO SOCRATES! IT'S A FUCKING COOKIE!
.
some_nerd: Green, are you drinking… drinking hydrogen peroxide?!
GreenTree: It says H2O2! That means it’s the sequel to water!
.
*at 3am*
alexlion0511: *runs into Crafty’s room and turns on the light* Wake up sleepyhead!
Crafty7: *wakes up* Dude!
alexlion0511: *cackles*
Spicyman33: *sits up from where he was sleeping behind Crafty* What the fuck, Alex?
.
Yessoan: Everyone has a toxic trait. Except MT, they’re perfect.
Meester Tweester: Wrong! My toxic trait is how badly I want to domesticate a raccoon.
.
Spicyman33: I have lots of friends!
Joseph Howard: Name one.
Spicyman33: Well, there’s-
Joseph Howard: Name one you haven’t gotten incredibly angry at.
Spicyman33: Hey, that’s not fair, then there isn’t any!
.
GreenTree: Remember, when burying a body, make sure to cover it with endangered plants so it’s illegal to dig up!
GreenTree: Make sure to follow me for more gardening tips!
.
Mike Ramsay: So I can either do something dumb that could very well get me injured, or I can listen to Qwerby and not do the thing.
Mike Ramsay: Well there’s a clear right answer here.
Mike Ramsay: *proceeds to throw five packs of mentos into a barrel full of diet coke*
.
Spicyman33: Joseph, if you don't shut up I'm going to throw myself out of the car.
*click*
Spicyman33: DID YOU JUST TURN THE FUCKING CHILDRENS' LOCK ON?!
.
TheMightyMidge: I love sarcasm! It’s like punching people in the face, but with words!
.
Midnight Light, ordering Starbucks: Hey, I just got my heart broken, what do you recommend?
AN9K, who’s running the drive thru: …
AN9K: Tequila.
.
xXBombs_AwayXx: Alex, you can do anything!
alexlion0511: Anything?
xXBombs_AwayXx: Anything!
alexlion0511, holding a torch: ANYTHING?!?!
xXBombs_AwayXx: Wait, not that!
.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: Vegetable oil is made from vegetables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so BABY OIL-
Tantusar: CAN'T WE JUST HAVE A NICE FAMILY DINNER FOR ONCE?!
.
fryUaj: Why is Alex crying?
Riley: He saw a leaf on the sidewalk and-
alexlion0511: IT LOOKED SO CRUNCHY!
fryUaj: Please don’t say what I think you’re gonna say-
alexlion0511: AND WHEN I STEPPED ON IT THERE WAS NO CRUNCH!
fryUaj: NO, NOT THAT!
.
Meester Tweester: Guys it’s a shooting star, let’s make a wish!
Midnight Light: I wish for good grades.
Yessoan: Nerd.
Midnight Light: Nevermind, I wish upon the shooting star to fall down at a 30° velocity aiming for Yessoan. :)
Meester Tweester: Midnight…
.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: What if I lied this whole time and I'm actually 18?
TheMightyMidge: PPCS, stop trying to get drugs.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: Don't suppress my interests.
.
taopwnh6427: It's called cauliflower, not ghost broccoli.
Ping Pong Cup Shots, eyes wide: I know what I saw.
.
some_nerd: When was the last time you cried?
Midnight Light: Uhh, 15 minutes ago, why?
some_nerd: Really? That recent?
Midnight Light: Yeah... *voice crack* Is that a issue? *starts crying again*
.
QwerbyKing: We need a plan to beat them.
Tak Ajnin: Okay, listen up. First, we fill their shoes with wet cat food.
QwerbyKing:
Tak Ajnin: Judge me all you want, I get results.
.
Spicyman33: So, did everyone learn their lesson?
TheMightyMidge: No.
xXBombs_AwayXx: I did not.
Meester Tweester: I may have actually forgotten one.
alexlion0511: Also no.
Spicyman33: Oh good, neither did I.
Tantusar: *Exhausted sigh*
.
alexlion0511 as a child: I can’t wait to grow up and have cool adventures!
alexlion0511 now: I can’t wait to go to bed.
.
Mike Ramsay: Hey Qwerby, can I get some icecream?
QwerbyKing: Only a spoonful!
Mike Ramsay: *Proceeds to pull out a comically large spoon*
.
fryUaj: Why would you give a knife to Alex?!
xXBombs_AwayXx, shrugging: He felt unsafe.
fryUaj: Now I feel unsafe!
xXBombs_AwayXx: I’m sorry…
xXBombs_AwayXx: Would you like a knife?
.
Spicyman33: What? I'm not aggressive!
Crafty7: Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips?
Spicyman33: Survival of the fittest, bitch.
.
some_nerd, having recently lost her glasses: KILL THE BUG!!!
Hazel Cricket: ....That’s a gecko—
.
GreenTree: Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff.
QwerbyKing: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!
.
TheMightyMidge: Goodnight to the love of my life, Tak, and fuck the rest of y'all.
.
*the Squad at Disneyland, in the teacups*
.
Meester Tweester: Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way.
.
Crafty7: I just heard Spiky call the dog a “fucking liar” because he barked like someone was at the door and no one was there.
.
AN9K: I am convinced Spicy and Crafty share a brain cell.
Joseph Howard: And it's not in use very often, it seems.
.
some_nerd: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life.
Juhmatok: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back...
Midnight Light: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this.
xXBombs_AwayXx: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years.
Tak Ajnin: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.
TheMightyMidge: Mental stability, my old friend!
some_nerd: Jesus, could you guys lighten up a little?
.
Mike Ramsay: I'm not mean. Name one mean thing I’ve ever done.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: When we were younger, you convinced me eggs weren't real.
Mike Ramsay: They're not.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: Haha, very funny.
Mike Ramsay: I'm serious. Didn't you hear?
Ping Pong Cup Shots: No... what happened?
Mike Ramsay: ...Why would you fall for this again-
.
Meester Tweester: Do you know the ABCs of first aid?
Spicyman33: A. Bone. Coming out of the skin is very bad.
.
alexlion0511, holding a toy lightsaber: I’m Darth Vader!
Tantusar: I’m done with everyone’s bullshit.
.
Tak Ajnin: Is Spicy always like this when he loses?
Joseph Howard: Oh, yes. You should've been there for the Great Jenga Tantrum of 2016.
Spicyman33: You bumped that table and you know it!
.
Ping Pong Cup Shots: He called me the B-word.
fryUaj: Motherfucker doesn’t start with a ‘b’.
.
Tak Ajnin: I never said I was gonna get back together with him. But I was thinking, he's in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave him a call?
QwerbyKing: No. No, Tak, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing.
Number one: a super volcano.
Number two: an asteroid hits the Earth.
Number three: All the Evel Knievel movies are lost.
Number four: Tak calls Midge.
Number five: Mike gets eaten by a shark.
Mike Ramsay: I’m Mike, and I approve the order of that list.
.
Riley: A mouse!
xXBombs_AwayXx, pulling out a knife: Go back to where you came from or I'll stab you.
GreenTree, pulling out a frying pan: It'll make a nice meal!
some_nerd, giving the mouse cheese: You deserve a treat, little guy.
Ping Pong Cup Shots, gasping: It's Ratatouille!
alexlion0511: His name is Remi, dummy.
Riley: ...I was going to say to just trap it and throw it out the window... what is wrong with you people.
.
Spicyman33: If I was married to you I would put poison in your coffee.
Joseph Howard: If I was married to you I’d drink it.
.
xXBombs_AwayXx, working at McDonald's: Sorry sir, we don't serve a McFuck here, so either you throw that one slice of pickle out or we're gonna have a McProblem.
.
Crafty7: HELP! I TOLD SPIKY I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!
alexlion0511, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
.
AN9K: You're ignoring all your problems.
Meester Tweester: I know.
AN9K: You also know it's an unhealthy coping mechanism?
Meester Tweester: I'm ignoring that fact as well.
AN9K:
.
fryUaj: Riley, where did Alex go?
Riley: He got arrested.
fryUaj: How the hell-
alexlion0511: *bursts in through the window* The cops are after me, I thought it would be fun to steal crackers and throw them at people.
.
Hazel Cricket: sSSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP-
Tantusar: ...Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE??
Hazel Cricket: BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!
.
some_nerd: *seductively takes off glasses* Wow, you're... blurry.
.
Spicyman33: Oh, they left the bowl out?
Spicyman33: It says, “Take two pieces of candy.”
alexlion0511: Nobody's around though…
*Alex grabs the entire bowl and runs off with it*
Spicyman33: NO—
.
Juhmatok: Time for plan G.
some_nerd: Don’t you mean plan B?
Juhmatok: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.
Tak Ajnin: What about plan D?
Juhmatok: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
TheMightyMidge: What about plan E?
Juhmatok: I’m hoping not to use it. Bombs dies in plan E.
Midnight Light: I like plan E.
.
alexlion0511: Meester, why are you crying?
Meester Tweester: This book is so sad!
alexlion0511, picking it up: But this is my diary-
.
some_nerd: An apple a day keeps the doctor
You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net