Chapter 13: Of Blame and Sisterly Bonds

Flashback Part 1 

Addy Freeland

She and Hayden had been sitting on a log on the campfire for hours, with nothing to do as Lillian patched the young girl up. Occasionally, Lillian would yell out for water or something else she needed, and one of them would rush to get it for her. Otherwise, they sat in silence, no sounds except the hooting of owls and rustling of leaves. No sounds except for the occasional groans coming from the girl.

This was both a blessing and curse for Addy. A blessing, because it gave her time to ponder all that the creature had said, and all that it knew. She prayed that it was the only one in possession of such knowledge, and that her secret had died with it, but she had a nagging feeling in her gut that that wasn't the case.

The problem with this long period of solitude was the glancing Hayden kept giving her. She could feel his eyes on her, and could tell that he desperately wanted to ask about her connection to the creatures, and what it had meant about her father. She could never give him an answer, not just because she didn't know parts of it, but because - well - she couldn't handle the way he would look at her if he knew the truth, if he knew that she had been lying this whole time.

After what felt like hours, Lillian emerged from the trees, the redheaded girl leaning on her. The girl's face was gaunt, and her arm was covered in gauze, but her eyes were bright and she was smiling slightly. She sat down at the campfire with no trouble, moving next to Hayden as Lillian sat down at Addy's other side.

There was a moment of silence as the girl surveyed the unusual group, and they looked at her in turn. She was tiny, and skinny too, and looked impossibly young with her wide eyes and bouncing curls making up most of her face. And when she smiled, she looked younger still.

And then the girl spoke, breaking the silence. "I suppose I should thank you for saving my life." She glanced at Lillian, then turned to the rest of them. "All of you. I'm Madison, by the way. Madison Gardner."

There was something about her accent, her lilted and light voice - it was Alurian. Addy couldn't help but smile at the thought. Travelling through Giana and Perrnath for so long, she had missed the familiar manner of speaking that she had grown up with. It was silly, but it felt like home.

"It was no trouble," Lillian told Madison, smiling and gracious. Addy couldn't help but envy Lillian's constant composure.

Hayden glanced at the girl with an appraising eye. "You're Alurian, aren't you?"

She met his stare head on, a surprising show of confidence considering Hayden could likely encapsulate her in a matter of seconds. "I'm from Moonlight City. What's it to you?"

"You'll forgive a curious traveller his questions on the fate of the kingdom the woman who fostered him was born in, won't you?"

Sometimes Addy forgot that Aunt Mara and Uncle Leon had raised Hayden after his brother had disappeared. Aunt Mara had certainly mentioned Hayden often in her letters to Abigail, even when there weren't any visible reasons to do so.

"I suppose not much news is getting out of Aluria, with the blockade and everything," Madison mused.

Addy felt her heart skip a beat. She hadn't heard anything about a blockade, and even though she had actively been trying to avoid news of her home country, she was certain she would have heard something like this. "A blockade? What sort of blockade?"

Madison looked at her, surprised. "I can't believe you haven't heard. Alura has stopped trading with Perrnath and Giana entirely, and there are all sorts of restrictions on when and where people can leave. It's honestly a miracle I got out when I did."

Lillian leaned towards Madison. "I haven't heard anything of the sort."

Addy's blood was pounding. That couldn't be true. Jason would never do something like that. Perrnath and Alura had always been close - especially since their ruling families were joined in marriage. And to not allow people to leave the country - what was going on in the Alurian borders?

Madison continued on. "Though I suppose Queen Luna doesn't want news of what she's been doing getting out," she said, more than a little bitterly.

"I'm sorry, Queen Luna?" Hayden interjected sharply. He spoke the name of the youngest Valadon sister with more than a little disgust.

"Yes, Luna Valadon. She's been ruling Alura for the past year, ever since Jason Valadon fell sick. A broken heart is what they say, but after everything that happened six years ago, I suppose it's understandable."

"I suppose it is," Hayden echoed.

The world stopped. Everything fell silent, and all she could hear was the ringing in her ears. Addy could feel a pure, unadulterated shock course through her. Luna couldn't be the Queen of Alura. That wasn't possible. That was...

Exactly something that her little sister would do.

Oh gods.

What had happened in Alura after her father had died?

If Addy wasn't fit to rule, to even have a crown on her head or be in a position of privilege, then Luna would be even worse. What had happened six years ago had proved that.

~~

There were certain undeniable facts of life. Alura and Mordan would always be at odds, Jay would always have his nose buried in a book, and Abigail Valadon would always hate her little sister Luna.

Abigail didn't know how everyone else couldn't see it, how wicked and vile Luna truly could be. It wasn't like it was difficult to see. Her sister was so blatantly, so obviously... wrong, so much of the time. There had once been flashes of good, little moments where Luna was kind and would play with her in the courtyard. But soon, the bitter rivalry between the sisters swallowed even these tender moments.

It had truly started when she had been twelve and Luna had been ten. The day after the worst argument the sisters had ever had, a practical screaming match in the dining hall. It had started over something trivial - Abigail accusing her sister of spilling soup on her favourite dress on purpose, but had quickly escalated, as arguments between the pair often did.

"You ruined it! Just like you ruin everything, Luna."

Luna laughed darkly, flashing her teeth in a wide-eyed show of aggression that nobody except Abigail seemed to notice, like always. "Funny, coming from the biggest shame in the family. Tell me, have you ever managed to get your head down from the clouds and realize just how stupid and vapid you really are? There's a reason everyone in Alura is thankful you're not the heir to the throne. Wake up and see it."

She winced. It wasn't like the usual arguments she and Luna had, where neither of them managed to land a solid hit. This hurt. And Luna knew it did - she had been in the room when Abigail had cried after the visiting noble children from Gilland had mocked her lack of knowledge of their customs. The resulting spat led to a major trade deal falling through.

Abigail had felt like such a shame on her family, but had been too prideful to ask her tutorer for extra help. When was she ever going to visit Gilland, any way? Jason wasn't likely to make her an ambassador for it, when he was king. But to be reminded of it now... Something in her snapped.

Coming up close in her sister's face, she whispered quietly enough so no one else at the table could hear: "Well, at least I'm not the strange, ugly girl who no one else in Alura likes. There's a reason you always sit alone at balls and parties, Luna, and it's not because everyone is intimidated by your precious little intellect. It's because no one likes you, because you're more Mordish than Alurian. Maybe you should do us all a favour and move there, I'm sure King Theodore would love you, like he loves all of the outcasts and demons no one but likes Lilith likes. Or run away, at least then I'll be free of you."

Luna's face went dark with rage. Her sister might not believe in the gods, but in Alura, comparing someone to Lilith was to call them pure, undiluted evil. It was a slur usually reserved for the worst of murders and rapists, and certainly not something to be used in a childhood squabble.

Abigail regretted the words almost as soon as they left her mouth-

SLAP!

She winced as the force of fingernails dug into her cheek, and could feel the taste of coppery blood in her mouth. Luna's wide, furious eyes were on her, as her little sister gave a strangled scream before raising her hand again and-

"That's enough!"

It was Father, like Abigail had never seen him before. He directed a furious glare towards Luna, one that she could barely see through her tears and the blood running down her face. The sting in her cheek was the most pain she had ever felt, but that was nothing compared to the shock she had felt that Luna had raised her hand towards her.

"Luna Valadon, your conduct today is inexcusable. To raise a hand towards your sister because of a foolish childhood argument..." Father sighed. "Go to your chambers, at once."

Luna's eyes were wet with tears, that brief flash of rage gone under Father's gaze. "But Father, she said-"

Father fixed a cold glare on the youngest Valadon child. "I don't care what your sister said. Go to your room. We'll discuss your punishment later."

Abigail could hear the heavy door of the dining hall slam, and the sound of muffled sobbing as Luna stomped her way up to her chambers. The servants in the hall had stopped completely, watching the ordeal with wide eyes. Jason's eyes were darting between Abigail and door Luna had exited through, like he expected another fight to break out any second.

Abigail felt faint, and a bit guilty too. What she had said to Luna had been unexcusable There was no reason to wish her young sister, no matter how irritating and mean-spirited she could be, dead, and to compare her to darkness incarnate when she knew the whispers of darkness that had followed her sister wherever she went affected her so...

There was no excuse. She had crossed a line.

"Are you all right, darling?" Abigail felt her father press a handkerchief to her cheek, could hear a few blood drops drip onto the cold marble floor.

She mustered up the rest of her energy to smile at her father, ignoring the guilt that she felt burrowing into her bones. "I'm fine, papa."

She would apologize to Luna later.

~~

She didn't get the chance. She knocked on Luna's door just before she went to bed, hoping that her sister had calmed down over the past few hours and would listen to what she had to say. She needed to apologize, needed to let Luna know that she really was sorry...

There was just silence. Abigail knocked again.

She heard the clicking of bottles, and then the sound of footsteps approaching the door. Luna opened it, eyes hardening when she saw her older sister standing outside the door.

"Luna, I just wanted to say I'm-"

The door was shut in her face before she could even blink.

Perhaps she would apologize to Luna tomorrow, then.

~~

Any apologizes died on Abigail's lips the next morning when she woke up and saw what lay on the floor. Her beloved tabby cat, Sprinkles, was sprawled on the floor, his cold and unseeing eyes directed up at her. He was dead.

Abigail screamed. The maids came running.

"A sudden sickness took the poor tabby," the palace physician was saying, a hand on her shoulder. "It's unfortunate, but there was nothing that could have been done. Death is a fact of life."

It wasn't until Abigail met Luna's eyes at breakfast that morning, and her sister smirked ever so slightly, that she had an inkling of what happened. Still, she refused to believe it. Luna had never been a kind soul, but to kill an innocent animal? Her sister would never.

But then Luna caught her arm after breakfast in the morning, and whispered: "Let me show you just how like Lilith I can be."

Abigail shot a disbelieving gaze at her sister. Luna only beamed in response.

She could barely hear the click of her sister's shoes as she sauntered away over the roaring in her ears.

Was it her? Had she finally driven her sister over the edge?

~~

Luna made good on her promise to follow in the goddess of cruel deception's footsteps. More and more incidents followed, little things that couldn't be traced back to the youngest Valadon princess.

Abigail's work for tutoring had gone missing on multiple occasions - her well thought out answers that she had painstakingly researched were replaced with ones rife with factual inaccuracies, and sprinkled with jokes and taunts in poor taste.

The new answers were written in a hand that looked nearly identical to her own, so the more she protested that she would never write something like that, the more Drusilla's mouth hardened, and Abigail was told to stop getting herself in more trouble, to own up to her mistakes.

She wanted to cry. Yes, she didn't always pay attention to Drusilla, but she would never write as vile and inaccurate things as the woman seemed to believe her capable of.

Her tutor had much to say about Abigail's conduct to her father. She recalled one time she had eavesdropped on a conversation between the two, ear pressed to the door and Eliza by her side.

"It is abhorrent, your majesty, that a royal daughter in Alura should conduct herself in such a manor, that she should refuse to put any attention into her studies. Princess Abigail may be a sweet girl, but I've never had such problems from Princess Luna or Prince Jason. The things she wrote-"

"Let me see, Drusilla."

There was the shuffling of papers. Abigail exchanged a glance with Eliza, knowing the sick feeling in her chest was visible.

Eliza flashed her a sympathetic look. Her friend had studied with her time and time again, and knew that Abigail had done all the work she claimed. At least she had one ally.

There was a pause.

"I'll talk to her," King Johan's voice was cold, the same one he used for trials at court. His king voice meant that Father was angry. What, exactly did the papers Luna had written - and she was sure it was Luna - say?

Father talked to her about her conduct a day later. She tried to tell him that she had no idea what the sheets even said, that it had not been her that had written them, but he had only shaken his head and ruffled her hair.

"Your conduct and beliefs reflect on all of us, my dear. Please do try to take your studies more seriously in the future."

The replacements continued, and when father came to talk to her again, it was with a lot less warmth in his eyes. He told her that she would be learning separately from her sister from now on - as Luna seemed to be having no trouble staying serious, and it was unfair that Abigail was slowing her down.

And so the divide between father and daughter grew.

~~

That was far from the worst thing Luna did. The incidents continued. Lady Natalie of Giana lost her prized glass comb, and it was found in pieces in Abigail's room. She seemed to be the only one who noticed a new bandage on Luna's arm the following morning - at least before Abigail was sent off and contained to her chambers the rest of the day.

An ancient Alurian text from the royal library was vandalized three months later? Well, it just so happened that Abigail's favourite pendant was found wedged between the bookshelves. The Royal Librarian was up in arms, and even after she spent months painstakingly recopying it for him after hours as punishment, she was still barred from certain sections of the library.

As the years went on and such incidents continued, any shred of goodwill between the two sisters was tarnished. It seemed all of the palace knew of the feud, and Abigail's one consultation was that despite her sister's best efforts, she was still beloved by the people. Whispers of Abigail's vain, airheaded attitude were still not nearly as common as the stories of a sweet young girl circulated after every public occasion and by palace servants.

Her family was a different story. Her mother had never particularly liked her, and Abby couldn't help but feel rather similarly. But she couldn't stand the disappointed look in Jason's eyes whenever she placed the rightful blame on Luna, or her father's ever hardening gaze.

It seemed Luna was trying to drive a wedge between Abigail and the rest of the family - and succeeding.

She prayed, whenever she saw her little sister's self-satisfied smile, that this was all that Luna had intended. That there wasn't something more sinister at play, that she would satisfy herself with petty revenge.

But deep down, Abigail knew that that wouldn't be the case. Something in Luna had snapped the day of the argument. Her sister's grasp on her sanity was like walking on a tightrope - one tiny thing could push Luna off. And it seemed like Abigail had finally been the one to shove her off the edge.

Whatever happened now was her fault. 

~~

Originally I planned to have the full flashback fit into one chapter, but that didn't exactly end up working out. We didn't even get to the deathbeds or the disownment yet. 

The whole reason that I started writing this story originally was because Abigail's backstory was so compelling to me, and I hope you enjoyed the beginnings of what made Addy the person she is today. A lot less happy then the other flashbacks, that's for sure. 

Up next week in Part 2: young Hayden Lochan and Addy bonding, a mysterious "plague" affecting the animals of the castle, a missing amulet, and the worst day of Addy's life. 

Let me know what you think of Luna, Addy, and the rest of the flashback characters!