You hug your boyfriend, Poe, and kiss him. "Bye Poe," you say. "I love you."

"Love you too (Y/N)," he says. "Come back in one piece, okay?"

"I will. I promise." You hug and kiss him before you jump into your x wing. You wait for Poe's signal, then you lift off, the whole Resistance fleet flying after him to go blow up Starkiller Base. The mission goes well at first. You approach Starkiller, and start shooting. There is still light, so there is still hope.

Then the TIE fighters come. They shoot at you, and you shoot back, hoping to keep them away so the fleet can blow up the planet. You can't manage to get them away, and it's getting dark fast. "Red 5, Blue 1, cover me," Poe yells. "I'm going in."

You continue to fight the TIE fighters, shooting them to keep them away from Poe so he could finish the mission. It's almost completly dark, but you can still see. You keep the TIE fighters at bay well enough. Then you see one flying at Poe. You curse and go after it. "Poe," you shout into the intercom. "Don't worry. Everything will be okay. Do what you have to do to win this fight. I love you."

"(Y/N), what are you talking about? Are you--" You disable your intercom and accelerate, flying straight at the TIE fighter. Tears stream down your face, and you don't bother to wipe them away.

"Sorry Poe," you whisper into the dark. You crash into the TIE fighter, close your eyes, and smile as you take your last breath.

***

"(Y/N)!" Poe screams as he sees your x wing crash into the TIE fighter that had been flying straight at him. "No, no, no, no! (Y/N)! (Y/N)!" The TIE fighter exploded, and your x wing fell to the ground, all crushed metal and broken glass. Poe flies straight for the thermal oscillator and gives it everything he's got, anger and sadness fueling his actions. The Resistance fleet flies after the Millennium Falcon as Starkiller explodes.

***

Back at the Resistance base on D'Qar, Poe lays on the bed in the room you two shared alone, staring at the ceiling and holding your pillow to his nose. It still smelled like you, green tea and peaches. He doesn't let himself cry, even though he desperately wants to. He knows you would want him to be happy, to be strong, to finish what he started, but it doesn't seem possible at the moment. He sighs and huggs the pillow tightly, as if letting it go would mean letting you go too.

Poe gets up and cooks dinner for himself, not wanting to go to the mess hall, where others will be there to congratulate and talk to him. He wasn't up for it. He turns on the radio and pokes at his food. When your song comes on, a few tears roll down Poe's cheeks.

We are the reckless,

We are the wild youth.

Chasing visions of our futures.

One day we will reveal the truth,

That one will die before he gets there.

And if you're still bleeding,

You're the lucky ones.

'Cause most of our feelings

They are dead

And they are gone.

When the song ends, Poe turns off the radio and plays with his food some more. BB8 rolls up to him, and he smiles sadly. BB8 beeps a few times and shows Poe a hologram of you two laughing together. Poe stares at it for a few minutes.

"Thanks buddy," he says after a bit. "That's just what I needed."

A/N: The lyrics above are from the song Youth by Daughter.