For being you and loving me...even though I am me!!

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Chapter 2

Paul was at the staff meeting on Tuesday getting ready to give his weekly report. Pastor Davis took a risk with Paul when he graduated from college earning a degree in Pastoral Studies. No one had ever heard of a Social Networking Pastor, and a couple of the pastors he pitched the idea to laughed in his face. Pastor Tony Davis was not one of them. He actually saw a future and a need for a pastor who was familiar with the digital and virtual world.

Although Paul always wondered if he earned the job, or if Pastor Davis was influenced in hiring him by his daughter Sydney, who was a good friend of Paul’s. Sydney knew how hard Paul had been working to find a pastor who would give him a chance.

Tony gave the floor to Paul, “This past week, I found a website that could be a great ministry tool. It allows people who write to post their stories, poems and short stories for others to read. It already has a community base and I began posting a devotional I am calling ‘Walking in Faith’. I hope to reach out to this community that is made up of a variety of diverse individuals from all over the world.”

“Sounds great. What is the website?” Tony leaned back in his chair and looked thoughtfully at Paul. Once Paul said that there was already a community built in, Tony’s eyes lit up and he knew the pastor would be interested.

“Wattpad. Their fan base is a variety of readers, but they do have categories you can follow and put your work in. My devotional will be in the Spiritual category.”

“That sounds great, keep me informed how it is going,” Tony said, “How is the Virtual Home Study?”

“Great. Sunday night we had fifteen attend and one person came in, not knowing it was a Bible study, and gave his heart to Christ in the end.”

“That is great news!” Sydney said.

Sydney had gone to college with Paul and convinced him to propose his idea to her father for the position of Social Networking Pastor. Sydney had a crush on Paul while attending college together. Since coming home they grew to be even better friends, but nothing more. Paul respected Sydney, but saw her as nothing more than a friend.

Along with his other duties, Paul managed the church website, Facebook account and basically anything on the Internet that was church related.

“I have also begun posting church and Bible trivia questions on the church’s Facebook page. I thought it would be a great way for people to learn more about the church. Especially those in the virtual world.”

“When do they learn the answers to the trivia?” Tony asked.

“They will be on the Sunday video announcements at church and then posted on the website and Facebook on Monday morning,” Paul said. “I need possible questions from every department and group. They can email them to me to use as needed.”

“That is a great idea!” Sydney said. “Why don’t we brainstorm some ideas later over lunch?”

Paul nodded and turned the meeting back over to Tony. Sydney scooted her chair a little closer to Paul and put her hand on his arm. Leaning over, her perfume was almost intoxicating. She whispered into Paul’s ear, “We can try that new Italian place over on Barrett.” As she spoke her breath was warm and stung Paul’s cheek and neck where it caressed him.

Paul just smiled at her, like a friend would do. He had again started seeing signs of flirtation with her for the past few weeks. He thought he squelched Sydney’s advances in college, but found it easier to ignore the advances then to hurt Sydney, whom he considered a dear friend. Telling her he loved her like a sister and that he was intent to work on his degree and ministry, would probably not work again.

Sydney had graduated with him, but her degree was in Church Music. As the minister of music, she had a beautiful voice and an anointing that could make people stop and listen,  not just to her amazing voice, but to the words and meaning of the song. She was also very beautiful, blonde curly hair down to her waist, and blue eyes that looked like the ocean sparkling on a sunny day.

Physically, Paul knew he could be attracted to Sydney. Spiritually, he had never met a better Christian, however the connection just wasn’t there. It wasn’t like he ever gave it a chance, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to have a romantic relationship like she wanted. The fact that they worked closely together, and Sydney was the Senior Pastor’s daughter were two more reasons he never gave it a chance! No, it was hard enough to find a pastor that believed in the missions field on the Internet, Paul could not mess this up by dating his one and only daughter.

At lunch, Sydney gave Paul some great church trivia. They were waiting on their lunches to arrive and Paul was adding the questions and answers to a document on his laptop. He looked up after adding the last one and saw Sydney had a mischievous smile on her face and her eyes were twinkling.

“I’ve got a great one!” Sydney was so excited, Paul thought she might burst on the spot if she did not get it out of her. “What staff member recorded a voicemail message quoting a scripture about a certain animal talking in the Bible and then said,  ‘At the sound of the beep, please allow the dumb ass to speak!’?”

Paul could barely hear Sydney at the end of the “trivia question” through all of her laughter, but he knew what she was saying. At first he was mad because she had promised to never mention this again. But then, he couldn’t help but join in on the laughter. “Hey!” he said through chuckles, “that’s not fair! First of all, you promised! Maybe I should word it, ‘What staff member asked an innocent college boy to record profanity on her voicemail?’ I think that would make a better question!”

Sydney rolled her crystal blue eyes at Paul and patted his arm, “Only you would darlin’, I prefer my question of course!”

“Of course!” Paul agreed, but refused to type either question in his document. “Do you remember your father’s reaction when he called? I am surprised I work for him after that!”

Sydney looked down at her hands resting on the table and then looked up at him through her eyelashes with a little grin playing across her face. “Well,” she said sheepishly. Paul had never seen Sydney shy before, it was rather attractive. “I never told him it was you! He told me that it might not be appropriate for someone to call and hear that and suggested rather strongly that I remove it. So, I did. He never asked whose voice it was, so I never told him.”

Grateful not only for Sydney’s omission to Pastor Davis, but also that lunch had arrived, they continued to gather more trivia questions as they ate. And they never spoke about the omitted question again, well at least not for today.

After lunch, Paul dropped Sydney off at the church and headed to his apartment to see what was happening around the world. He found that he got most of his news lately from the Internet, choosing to read a variety of sources, but also surfed a couple of good news websites for videos. It was amazing, he could see what was happening on the other side of the world in just a few easy clicks.

He also needed to post a new devotional on Wattpad. Signing in, he was happy to see that his devotional was ‘What’s Hot #146’ and knew that with each chapter, more people would be touched by the words God gave him.

‘God knew before you were born the plans he had for you. He even knew what door you would walk through and the doors you would pass by. But, luckily for us stubborn children, God allows second, third and even fourth chances (sometimes even more, I know from experience). He will allow us to choose on our own. No other deity, has ever given their subjects a chance to choose. But, the One True God is a gentleman and He will not force us to do things we don’t want to do. And He will even take us into His loving arms when we screw up and cry, ‘Abba, Father’ because He loves us.

I remember as a child a store on the corner. Every day, after school, I went to buy something for someone in my father’s office. A soda, a candy bar, a pack of gum. Every day, the store owner offered me a treat. Every day, I refused saying ‘No thank you.’ But, one day, he did not offer, and that was the day that I wanted it. When I returned to my father’s office, he asked me ‘Son, where did you get the money for that?’ I told him the truth. I had nothing to fear telling my father the truth. I tried to explain that every day the owner of the store offered it to me, and he tried to explain that taking it without permission was stealing and wrong. Did my father yell? No. Did my father get upset? No. Was my father disappointed? Maybe, but he taught me a lesson in forgiveness that day. He took me by the hand and lead me to the store. I apologized to the owner and paid for the treat with my own money. Afterwards, Daddy took me in his arms and hugged me saying, ‘Son. You can come to me for anything. I will always love you. You might not make the right choice, but I will never stop loving you.’

That day, my Daddy modeled for me what our Heavenly Father is like. If I have a problem, I go to him and crawl into his arms. He will never leave me or forsake me. I will not despair because my Heavenly Father knows the plans he has for me. They are plans for good and not for evil. They are plans to lift me up, not put me down. All I have to do is choose the path he has laid before me.’

Posting his devotional, Paul prayed. “Lord God, you know who needs to read this. I pray that you use the words here to give hope to the hopeless and help to the weary. In Jesus name, Amen.”

Millie’s cell phone rang, caller ID showed that it was her mother. ‘GREAT! Just what I need right now, a guilt trip!’Wondering if she could let it go, she knew she couldn’t, her mother would just keep calling, ‘Might as well get it over with.’

“Hello Mother,” Millie really did not have time for this. She had a client that needed her full attention right now. His website was being revamped and she was on a deadline.

“Darlin’,” Her mother’s southern drawl came out. True Southern Belle, Mary Anderson born and raised in Georgia, always doing what was proper and what was expected. She expected her daughters to do the same, “I haven’t heard from you in a while. You know you need to check in with me every few days so I know you are OK.”

“I’m sorry mother, work has me busy pretty much all of the time right now.” Feeling upset with herself, she knew this call could have been avoided if she would have called her mom while she was at her Garden Club meeting yesterday and left a message on voice mail.

“Well, why don’t you come to church with us on Sunday. You know your father would love to see you. And then we will take you to lunch at the club.”

“I am sure this is not the first time I have disappointed Daddy,” Millie said, then she realized she said it out loud! That was only suppose to be a mental thought.

“Amelia! Your father loves you.”

“I know mother! And you know I can’t come on Sunday. I need to get back to work, I am on a hard deadline.”

“OK. Call me in a few days so I don’t worry about you. And darlin’ if you change your mind, you are always welcome.”

“I know mother. And I will call in a few days.” ‘While your at Bridge!’ Millie added, making sure this time it was only a mental note.

Looking at her email inbox, Millie noticed that Paul had posted a new story or chapter in his devotional. She logged in and began reading. She loved God. She knew she was saved, even if she did not go to church. Her family and many others would equate that to not being a Christian. Unlike Paul, she could never equate God to be the loving Heavenly Father that some saw him as.

Sure, her father was a good man. He made sure his family was in church, at least to be seen every Sunday growing up. His philosophy was that Christians go to church, so they can live like the devil six days a week, and it was OK because he went to church on Sunday. Millie’s father was not the devil, but she could never crawl into her Daddy’s lap for a hug. That was not acceptable and according to her father, that was what her mother was for.

She could hear her father saying, “Millie, stand up tall and don’t hang on me.” She was only four, but she did not like being in the middle of a crowd. She longed for the solitude of her nursery. Her father insisted that both girls accompany them to the Christmas party. “We must make a united front and let everyone in society know that we are handling things like Anderson’s should.”

Millie’s grandmother had just passed away. Nana, the matriarch of the family, loved by all and feared by some. Not because she was mean, she was the sweetest lady anyone would ever know, but she knew everything about everyone. Any secret in town eventually made it’s way to Nana and she knew even the darkest secrets about some of Atlanta’s most influential citizens.

Dying of a stroke was not how anyone expected Nana to go. Actually, they thought the woman would outlive everyone. She had already buried two husbands and a son. Thomas, Tom as he liked to be called, was Millie’s father and Nana’s only living child. He was now the senior member of the Anderson family and needed to show everyone that all was well, that he had everything under control. But when a timid four year old did not want to go to the Christmas party and wanted instead to cling to her favorite teddy bear that Nana had given her, that was not allowed.

Never had she felt comforted in her father’s arms, so Millie could never imagine a Heavenly Father that was loving and kind. Distant and disappointed was more like it. Millie heard an all too familiar ping as she finished reading Paul’s story and pulled herself from thinking about how different their childhood must have been.

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

u online?

MilliVanilli:

yeah

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

haven’t heard from u in a few days

MilliVanilli:

busy...work

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

i c

MilliVanilli:

just read ur story

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

did u like it?

MilliVanilli:

yeah, ur dad sounds nice

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

yeah he is

MilliVanilli:

do you live close to them?

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

about an hour away

MilliVanilli:

cool...sounds like a good buffer

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

buffer?

MilliVanilli:

yeah, far enough away that they can’t just stop by

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

I guess

I wouldn’t mind if they did stop by

Millie was quiet for a few minutes. Paul wondered about her parents, were they abusive? Or did Millie just choose not to be close to them?

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

ur parents close?

MilliVanilli:

yeah

too close sometimes

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

not close?

MilliVanilli:

closer than I want

not close enough 4 my mom

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

hard sometimes to draw the line

not kids anymore

At this point he realized he did not know how old Millie was. She could be twenty or sixty. Age became irrelevant on the Internet, well as long as you were not breaking laws, which Paul wasn’t. He knew Millie had a successful career and knew that she would need to be out of college for that to happen.

MilliVanilli:

tell me about it

they think i’m a kid and need to check in every few days

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

i guess they will always see us as their babies

i know my mom does

as a teen she often told me that!

MilliVanilli:

lol

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

what?

MilliVanilli:

just can’t picture you as a baby!

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

HEY! i was a cute kid!

MilliVanilli:

i am SURE u were

just sayin i can’t picture it

A few minutes later, Millie had a ping letting her know she had a new email. In her inbox was a picture of a cute blonde, almost white haired boy with crystal blue eyes and a gapped tooth smile. He was in about first grade and apparently lost a tooth a few weeks before as a new tooth was fighting to come in. He, of course, was cute.

MilliVanilli:

OK OK i can picture it now

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

AND?

MilliVanilli:

you were cute

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

and...when do I get to see urs?

MilliVanilli:

lol!!

rofl!!

NEVER!!

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

come on

MilliVanilli:

if you want to picture me think of Scooby Doo

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

the dog?

MilliVanilli:

the cartoon

i’m a mix of velma and daphne

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

beauty and brains?

MilliVanilli:

hardly

mostly brains

daphne’s southern charm LOL!

or at least my mother wishes!

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

HEY! I know a lot of those belle’s

MilliVanilli:

i’m sure u do!

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

well, i am a southern gentleman

hey, does this mean u live in the south?

MilliVanilli:

:-)

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

where?

MilliVanilli:

2 personal

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

OK - i can respect

but, i will only ever tell u the truth

i expect the same... deal?

MilliVanilli:

:-) yes

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

:-)

gotta go, meeting a friend 4 dinner

MilliVanilli:

ttyl

HeDied4Me-ILive4Him:

bye

Millie opened up YouVersion in her browser. She had not used a Bible in years and preferred looking up and reading scriptures on her computer. She took her glasses off, wiped them on the edge of her shirt and then replaced them on her face. She began reading in James chapter 1. When she came to the part that read, “Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of first fruits of all he created.”

Thinking about this and about Paul’s story, she wondered, ‘Does my heavenly father love me? Does he care about me?’ Then she prayed, “Lord, Father, if you are like a father that I can go to and rest in and you know my needs better than I do, please Father, help me to live my life to the fullest. Help me to see you moving in my life. I know that will require a miracle, and me coming out of my comfort zone,