Even though Master Synn told me to sleep well, I stay up wallowing in sadness far past nightfall.

Why do I want this man's approval so much? Why didn't he like my drawings? And why do I find him so frustratingly attractive and appealing when I couldn't even find Meben handsome or intriguing?

My life has flipped upside down since I arrived here.

I've been flooded with too many questions to ever truly figure out the answers to, but one stands out the most: Why do I feel so conflicted about Master Synn?

It would be much easier if he was a terrible Master. If he was a mean man - cruel, perhaps - who wanted to hurt me or abuse me, it would be easy to hate him. But...he isn't. He seems patient, kind, and compassionate...and somehow he's still intimidating and powerful.

He didn't even capture or purchase me, either. He isn't like Vylek - a creepy man who buys young women for pleasure. Master Synn is...different in ways I don't understand. And I don't feel bonded to him because he's captured me, because I'm trapped, or because I'm "owned" by him. I feel drawn to him because he's intriguing and kind-hearted.

He brings me delicious, delicately crafted meals. He allows me to stay in a well-furnished room far more comfortable and lavish than my dirt-floored canvas shelter in the woods. He comforts me when I have nightmares. He touches me so delicately...

A flush dusts my face in heat.

Despite the fact that everything has felt completely out of control, there is something about this house, this bedroom, and this Master of mine that feels still, calm, and concrete. And although being alone fills me with enough sadness to make me want to burst into tears, there is something warm and serene about the way Master Synn stayed with me during my nightmare.

I still want to run away, don't I? This is what I didn't want: To be controlled, just like I was in my village. But it isn't like my village. Master Synn isn't the same kind of man as my father or Meben. He asks for my opinions. And if I ask for something, he considers it. That's more than any man in my life has ever done for me.

*************

When I awaken the next morning, I have no desire to color in my coloring book. I curl up in bed and stay there, staring at the ceiling until Master Synn enters.

His head tilts to the side and his lips part when he sees me perched on the bed, doing nothing.

"You look tired." His brow tenses and he looks at the floor. "Nightmares again?"

My heart sparks to life in my chest. I had convinced myself that I'd imagined it and pushed it out of my head, but here he is confirming it. I thought it was real, but to hear it come from Master Synn's lips cements the fact that what happened wasn't a dream or my imagination.

"Would you like me to stay with you again?" His sharp brow rises and my eyes widen.

My face pinkens and I stare down at the ruffles of my dress, fiddling with them between my fingertips. Do I want him to stay with me again?

I clench the smooth fabric tighter between my fingertips, rubbing them together hard now. Would I have more nightmares, the same nightmares, or fewer nightmares with Master Synn in the bed with me? It is true that him stroking my hair and sleeping beside me calmed me down, distracted me, and relieved my nightmares for the rest of the night...

"Um, maybe..." The words slide off my tongue before I can stop them. Before I remember that Master Synn tore the pages out of my coloring book. Why had I forgotten that so easily just from being flustered by him? "Was there something wrong with my drawings?"

He tilts his head and his lips open in a gentle part. If possible, his brow draws even tenser over his light eyes. He runs his fingers up his forehead and through his hair. "You think I tore them because I didn't like them?"

"I-I don't know." I shrug, unable to meet his eyes. He steps closer and his warm hand wraps around mine. He leads me up from the bed and across the room, pulling me down the hallways until we reach a beautiful kitchen.

Adorned with rich stone flooring and countertops, expensive cooking equipment, and beautiful white lights that hang like icicles from above, the room looks like something out of a dream. A large cooler sits at the back corner of the room and framed on it are my drawings. My jaw drops and I quickly turn my gaze toward the floor.

I can't believe he hung them up. I don't even know what to say. I thought he didn't care, but he did. Instead of disliking my drawings, he treasured them enough to frame them and put him up in his house...or...in our house.

"You have permission to travel between this room and your bedroom. Every day you can prepare a meal for me at midday and you must also prepare food for yourself as needed." His voice is firm, authoritarian, but...not forceful. Even when Master Synn instructs or commands me to do things, it doesn't feel as gritty and forced as my father's commands or the commands Meben would have given me. "Use whatever you would like and make a list for me of what you want on the cooler frequently."

"Thank you, Master Synn." I nod back, smiling through my tears. I never thought there would be a nice way of owning someone else, or even a nice way to command someone to do something, but everything about Master Synn's instructions make me feel safe and gently guided.

And he listened to me, again. I asked to make him a meal and I expressed boredom being stuck in that bedroom, and now he's letting me out of the room every single sunrise to cook as I please. If I asked my father to marry a different man, he wouldn't have listened or let me. If I'd have asked Meben to let me go into the woods, he would have laughed and forbidden me.

Why is it that being a slave feels even freer than living in my old home?

"There is a list of the foods I eat over there." He motions to a countertop nearby, and I notice a page sitting atop it with scribbled handwriting. It's a list of assorted types of meat, all marked to be undercooked. That fact makes me a little nervous; I guess Master Synn is purely a meat-eater.

"Understood, sir," I reply, forcing a smile. I wonder how many more of Master Synn's race there are in the world. My tribe had only thought them to be a myth and even at the auction I hadn't seen any others of his race. 

"Do you have any family, Master Synn?" I boldly ask, but the expression that twists Master Synn's handsome features tells me I shouldn't have.

"Stick to your work." Master Synn hisses, looking down. I apologetically bow but he storms past me out of the room. I take a deep breath and slowly exhale, knowing I've somehow upset him.

I sit down in the kitchen and trace the stone flooring, infinitely happy to be somewhere other than my room for a while. Hours pass until I assume it's likely around midday. I take out the cooking utensils and dig through the cooler until I find a chunk of meat I think it suitable for Master Synn's palate.

I trim the meat and hear something behind me. Master Synn? When I turn around, it looks like I'm still the only one in the room. I sigh and turn back toward the dish I'm making.

And a cold metal blade slides against my throat.