Feeling very satisfied with the ramen, Saiki finally had some time to himself. He sat down to play the game that all of the nuisances had kept him from. He started it up and was immediately greeted with a litany of cutscenes. Saiki got annoyed quickly.

Why is the game keeping me from playing the game? I've already had the nuisances to keep me from playing the game. I'm willing to bet one of them is bearing down on my position as we speak.

He continued with the cutscenes until one fateful moment. A character called "The Handler'' made her dynamic entrance, assaulting Saiki with the word "Partner". Saiki immediately suffered a mental image of Nendou's face plastered on The Handler's body. No wonder this part had not been spoiled by anyone. He needed to figure out where the language settings were. Hopefully she wouldn't be that important.

After a few more "Partners" the game finally started. However, there was one more problem. The cat character he had created in the menu, the Palico, constantly made cat puns like an annoying wise-cracking sidekick whose gimmick got old after the first 20 minutes of the game. He was reminded of another annoyance he hadn't seen in a while, Amp. At least this cat was going to try to be useful instead of acting like he owned the place for simply existing.

He toured around the hub world called Astera, taking in all the sights. The game was certainly a breath of fresh air. The music that punctuated the environment of the hub world was both fitting and atmospheric. The hub world itself was brimming with life and activity. There were other hunters around carrying things, filling out manifests, growing plants, and a host of other activities. It very much made him feel a small part of something greater, not a destined hero like the inferior games he had played.

So this is what it feels like to play a good game.

Saiki was exploring Astera when he happened upon an area called the canteen. There was a short intro cutscene in which he was greeted with the largest plate of food he had ever seen. There was a smorgasbord of delectable looking meats, curries, and skewers accented by various fruits, cheeses, and dumplings and finished off by a comically large tankard. The whole chicken had sizzled as it finished cooking and he had seen the Palicos dress up the food as well, nice details that made the final product all the more satisfying. He hoped there was a dessert version of this magnificent plate that included coffee jelly. He would never stop playing it if they did.

His character dug in, grabbing entire skewers and the tankard and wolfing them down as if he had never eaten a day in his life. Saiki had no idea how one person ate all of that, but he did. It had taken him around 30 minutes to get to this point though with all the cutscenes and character creation so Saiki decided that it would be a good place to stop. He was glad that he finished with the food, as it really helped sell the attention to detail by providing a unique visual experience.

He hadn't even started the game yet and it had already been better than any other game he had played. There had been some very high highs and very low lows, but even a middling experience was better than the trainwrecks he normally played. The low lows were something he wouldn't have detested as much if not for personal experience so he decided to give it a pass. It was a good escape from reality, but reality was currently knocking on his door.

"Ku-chan, may I come in?"

He tensed up.

Yes.

His mother slowly opened the door bearing a look of sadness and concern.

Oh come on, Mom.

The two of them were silent for at least a minute.

"Are you... doing alright?" she said, unsure of how to broach the topic.

Yes, I'm fine. I'm not exactly sure how to handle this situation. I said some troublesome things that I'm starting to regret, Saiki stated with a grimace.

"It's ok to let people in, Ku-chan. You've kept all of this bottled up for so long. You try so hard to be a good person in your own way, but it's obvious that it's taken more of a toll on you than either of us were willing to admit. I always worry about you, and I was sad when you still treated Akechi with cold indifference even after he discovered your powers. You keep even the people who know about your powers at arm's length. You deserve comfort and love as well, and Papa and I have done the best we could to give it to you. I couldn't bear having your life be stolen from you without your consent. But you already knew all of this, didn't you?" His mother stared off into space, pondering the events that led them to this point. She knew him way too well.

"So what does this mean for you and Kokomi-chan?" She said, banishing her previous thoughts.

I'm not sure. Trying to control and outthink everything and everyone is becoming more tiresome with each passing day. I've come to learn that people are much less deterministic than I thought they were. The only way to preserve my sanity is to try not to think about it and let things run their course, he replied matter-of-factly.

He immediately started to think about it.

I can't allow myself to slip further. I can't allow any more surprises. Sure, letting things run their course may be good; but I want to do it on my terms, not hers. I won't let this happen again.

"I'm so glad to hear that, Ku-chan. I'm glad you're making progress toward becoming a happier person. That's all I've ever wanted. I don't want to push you too much. Today was a hard day for you. I will be downstairs if you need me."

She silently left and gingerly closed the door behind her.
_____

Back at the Teruhashi residence, the daughter was troubled by many conflicting thoughts. She may have bit off a bit more than she could chew. Before she had focused her attention on many different guys, but now she was focused on only one and she was completely in over her head. Where did her confidence go? Why was it SHE that turned out to be the stereotypical love interest? How did it end up like this? Before she had the world wrapped around her finger, and now her worldview was wrapped around a tree. She was still in just as much disbelief as she had been as she had when they had teleported out to the wasteland. Perhaps she still had some confidence as people who weren't her likely wouldn't have come to talk about it the very next day. At least that's what she tried to tell herself. Why did she bother going over there in the first place? Why was it that very time she stumbled upon the truth? It seems to have been mostly happenstance. Like Saiki said, she had gotten closer and closer to him to the point that something was going to break. It could have gone much worse in retrospect. She seemed to have lucked out yet again.

Thanks, god.

However, even more pressing questions had remained unanswered.

Why did he tell me I was equal to him?

She had not thought in her wildest dreams that his brother had been telling the truth when he said that Saiki was out of her league. She was merely a girl with a relatively minor cheat ability and a superiority complex. She still didn't know the full extent of his abilities, but given how distant he had been she imagined he was much more powerful than he had let on. How could he not hate her after all he had heard and seen of her true self? In fact, how did he not hate all of them? He had become softer with time, but could he ever connect with them in any meaningful way?

Could he ever connect with me?

She shuddered when she remembered that most of her interactions with him had involved him trying to avoid her. He even went so far as to set up the boys at the mixer to make her forget about him. That one hit her very hard. She had no idea whether to be mad, sad, or happy that it turned out the way it did.

I guess it's only natural for someone so isolated to be so wary of affection.

She was really not much better off either. No one would have paid her any mind had she not been born the way she was. Why did she care about him so much? Why did she want to be close to him and see him succeed? For her entire life before him, she would not have had any qualms with using people and throwing them aside when they outlived their usefulness. Maybe that was the x-factor. She said that off the cuff earlier, but she thought of it this morning too. She realized that she had a chance at a normal relationship and started to catch feelings she didn't know she had.

Am I still selfish? Of course I am.

Everything she had talked about so far was about her wish to be with him romantically, not even considering his feelings. Had she really worked as hard to be a better person as she thought she did when she was at Saiki's house? Or was it just another delusion? She sighed. This reaffirmed that her best bet was to try her best to actually be a friend to him and let god sort out the rest. She wasn't much better at normal relationships than he was anyway.

It's too late to doubt yourself. You are Kokomi Teruhashi, favored by god, and you have never known defeat.

For the first time, she would take the plunge with someone who could actually hurt her.

So when is the next time I can see him? Is it selfish to want a friendship?