I don't know how long I've been in WICKED's possession. I don't know if Minho's still alive. I don't know if any of my other friends are still alive. All I know is that my name is Venus Paige. Thomas is my half-brother. I'm infected with the Flare, but I haven't turned yet. At least, I don't think so.

I scratch another tally mark on the wall of my cell. The marks say that I've been in here for one-hundred-and-sixty-eight days in total, but I know it's been longer than that. 

I can't tell who my friends are and who my enemies are. I can't tell if I'm living a dream or not. I can't tell what's real and what's fake anymore. I can't even tell if I'm real anymore.

I spend my days in and out of the laboratories. Permanent scars litter my body from where needles have poked my skin and injected serums into my bloodstream. I've been in and out of my own dreams so much that I don't know if what I'm remembering is real or something that WICKED made. 

I stare at my hands blankly, the untouched food that was slid through the slot in the door sitting beside me. A bottle of water, a slice of bread, and a few crackers. Just enough to keep me alive, but not enough to stop the hunger that claws at my stomach day after day.

"Venus?" My head snaps up, my eyes meeting a familiar pair of blue ones. I reach up to my neck, but it's completely bare without the necklace. My hands drop.

"You're not real." I mutter, looking down at the ground and tangling my fingers in my hair. I begin rocking back and forth, closing my eyes tightly to block out the image of him. "You're not real. You're dead. Nothing's real. Go away. You're not real. Nothing's real."

"Venus?" His voice morphs into that of a girl's. I look up and see Teresa standing in front of me in the same spot where Gally stood just a moment ago. "Did you hear me?" I stare at her blankly, blinking away the image of Gally. "You're being moved to a new place soon. The Chancellor said that it's too risky to keep you all here when the Right Arm knows where our bases are located. You and the rest of the kids are being moved to a different base in a week."

"Why haven't I turned yet?" I croak, untangling my fingers from my hair. My throat feels like sandpaper. Teresa's eyes soften, an almost sympathetic look passing across her features.

"The doctors say that your body won't allow the virus to spread anywhere past the first stage. They say it has to do with some kind of antibodies in your blood." She hesitates. "They're not sure if the virus will eventually fight the antibodies off or not."

"So, they're not sure if I'll ever become a Crank or not?" I ask. Teresa shakes her head and I look back down at my hands, unable to look her in the eyes any longer. 

After a moment, Teresa sighs. "Minho's alive." She says. My head snaps up. 

"Really?" I ask.

"He's on the other side of the compound, but I promise, he's alive." She replies. I nod, a sense of hope filling my body. At least I can add one thing to my mental list of the good things I have left. There's a silence that passes between us. Teresa checks the time on the watch on her wrist before looking back at me, her gaze softening once again. "What we're doing here is good, Venus. I promise."

I look up at her, my eyebrows furrowing. "You think this is good?"

"I think that WICKED is." She replies, almost nonchalantly. It's as if she's forgotten what they've done to me and God knows how many others. Suddenly, I feel sick again when I look at her. "We're saving humanity. Once we get the Cure, everything can go back to the way it was. It can all go back to-"

"Normal?" I sneer, finishing her sentence. Teresa hesitates, nodding. "Yeah, I've heard that one before."

"It's true! Once we get the Cure, we can start over. We can all start living again."

"And how long until you find the Cure? Weeks? Months? Years?" Teresa hesitates again. Before she can start her sentence, I say, "What happens if you never find it?"

"Venus, stop. Don't say th-"

I try to steady my shaking hands. "Why don't you just kill me?" I interrupt. Teresa furrows her eyebrows, standing a little straighter as she looks down at me.

"What?" She questions.

"I have no future. Please, Teresa. Please, kill me." I plead.

She looks around the room before her eyes land back on me, glassy and confused. "Don't say that, Venus. You have a future! You do!"

"Don't you see what they're doing to me? I don't want to live like this! I can't! They're gonna kill me anyway! Please, kill me now so that I don't have to die on their terms!"  Teresa's figure blurs as tears sting my eyes. I let them roll down my cheeks and fall to the floor.

She shakes her head repeatedly, her hands wringing together as she tries to speak. Finally, she says, "I-I can't. I can't do that to you."

I let out a noise somewhere between a scoff and a sob. "I'm begging you, Teresa. Please! If you have ever been my friend, please, kill me!"

Tears drop down her face. She shakes her head, her bottom lip trembling. "S-stop." She pleads, her voice shaking. "Don't ask me to do that. Please."

"They're killing me anyway! Can't you see that?! They're starving me! They're gonna kill me once I'm of no use to them anymore! Please, don't let them decide when I die!"

"I can't kill you, Venus!" She shouts. She shoots to her feet and starts walking away, but I lunge at her, tackling her to the ground. Her head hits the ground and she lets out a horrified scream. I wrap my hands around her neck, straddling her waist. 

"Kill me!" I roar, watching as her eyes begin to bulge out of their sockets. Horrible sounds emit from her throat as she looks up at me, trying desperately to fight me off of her. I can hear the guards bursting into my room. "Please! Please, Teresa! Please!" I'm dragged off of the girl, and thrown against the wall on the other side of the room.

I watch as Teresa is helped to her feet by two guards, coughing, gasping, and wheezing for breath. She clutches at her throat, already bruising from where my fingers dug into her skin. She's quickly ushered out of the room, the guards shouting for medics to come help her.

I don't fight the guards away from me when they force me to stand against the wall. One of them grabs hold of my wrists, not caring whether or not his grip is too tight. The other one pulls out a syringe of a blue liquid, forces my head to the one side, and stabs the needle into the side of my neck.

Almost immediately, the effects of the serum begin to take over. The room begins to spin and the guards let go of me, leaving me to crumple to all fours. They walk out without giving me a second glance. The room is spinning. I try to crawl towards the door, but my legs are heavy and my arms can't support my body weight.

I fall flat on the floor, my face pressed against the cool concrete. I see Ben and Winston standing just a few feet away, veins creeping up their neck, a wild, murderous look in their eyes. Chuck stands beside them, a bullet hole in his chest and blood soaking through the fabric of his shirt. Right next to him is Gally, a gun outstretched towards me. My eyes droop closed as the sound of a gunshot rings in my ears, lulling me to sleep.