Y/n's pov

A month and a half (ish) later

"It's raining," I looked out the car window.

"Perfect," Charles opened the car door, walked round to my side and opened my door.

"What a gentleman," I blushed as he held my hand, walking into the paddock. I loved this. The last few weeks had been a montage of breakfast in bed and dancing round the living room at midnight. I had never been happier. I squeezed his hand. "You look nervous, you ok?"

"I'm fine," he replied, opening his umbrella as the rain got heavier. "Is your dad watching this one?"

He changed the subject quickly. Something wasn't right. "Um, no he isn't, my cousin is helping out on the farm today, so he gets a lie in, so 6am is a bit too early."

"Yeah I forgot about the time difference," we walked into the Ferrari suite, Carlos was already here with Ella and Isa.

"Took your time, come on Fred wants to speak to us," Charles kissed me and made his way into the back.

"How is he today?" Ella said once he was out of the room.

"He's a bit off," I sat down where Carlos sat. Isa pulled a sympathetic face.

"It must be horrible coming back here, especially in the rain," she said, I looked at her confused. What was she on about?

"Yeah, it hurts him every year," Ella nodded, sadness coming across her face.

"What does?" I asked.

"Oh my god he didn't tell you did he?" Ella gasped.

"Tell me what?" I was so confused, I thought Charles said no secrets?

"Y/n this is where Jules had his crash," Isa said quietly.

Suddenly everything clicked. He'd always looked up to Jules, and when he died it broke his heart, according to his mother. This was why he was quiet this morning and why he'd been distant since we got here.

"Why didn't he tell me?" I looked at them both, feeling so stupid, but also having the overwhelming urge to find him and hug him.

"He never talks about it," Ella said. "He shutdown when he's here, always has done. The rain certainly won't help today."

I sat in the chair. Silence filled the room.

"You look so good in that race suit," I smiled at my boyfriend as he walked into the garage.

"Red is my colour," he winked at me, his smile returning to his face. "Are you going to stay here the whole time?"

I nodded. "I like seeing everything work, and listening to your radio, it makes me feel better as you drive around here at 300 kph."

He kissed my cheek. "I'll try not to yell so much this time, Singapore was a little frustrating."

"I'd say, nearly blew my ear drums off," I laughed. I looked at him again as the rain still fell from the sky and bounced off the tarmac. "Hey, are you ok?"

"Yeah I'm fine."

"I mean it Charles, you can talk to me you know," I looked into his eyes.

"I know. Really I'm fine, I always drive this one for him."

And with that, he was ushered out of the garage. He blew me a kiss before he walked out of my sight.

The race started behind the safety car. As the rain started to ease, the race got into full swing. Esteban and Pierre took each other out for the 3rd time this season, I could hear Otmar's screams down the pit lane. Max was 8 seconds clear of Checo who was fighting with Fernando and George for the podium. Charles was stuck in a DRS train behind Lewis with Carlos, Lando and Nico trailing behind. There was a few laps of nothing, I didn't like it.

I noticed the clouds begin to darken overhead. The radar showed rain in the next 10 minutes, but with only 6 laps to go, the team were in no hurry to bring out the wets.

My heart rate quickened as a saw a drop of rain splash outside the garage. It was followed by another, and another until you could barely see in front of you. The team radioed Charles to ask about wet tyres, but he refused, as the other drivers did.

It continued to pour and the track began to look like a swimming pool. Something didn't feel right in my body, I looked back at Isa who was pulling the same face. I tapped my foot against the ground and focused on the Ferrari as it took the corners on the penultimate lap.

"Losing too much grip," Charles crackled voice said.

"Hold on now," his engineer said.

He began the last lap. He speeded down the straight. As he took the first corner, his wheel slipped on a wet patch of the track. The car rotated, spinning around, sliding onto the grass way too quickly. It slammed into the barrier at full speed.

I didn't move. A gasp could be heard from the crowd as I looked at Charles wreckage. Smoke was coming from the back of the car. An eerie silence filled the garage.

"Charles," his engineer spoke through the radio. "Charles, can you hear me?"

No answer. I took a breath. Tears stung my eyes as I stared at the screen in front of me. I kept looking at it thinking, at any moment he's just going to hop out. But he didn't.

"Charles, the marshals are coming," Xavier said again. "If you can hear me, you have to stay still. The engine is unstable."

My heart stopped. The engine was about to explode. Everyone around me knew it. I looked around in pure panic before Ella and Isa rushed up to my side. I could barely stand.

The marshals waved their red flags, and cars came slowly back into the pit lane. I didn't even notice. I put all my energy into praying he was ok, willing him to speak.

I watched as the marshals rushed to his rescue. Ella was in floods of tears and I noticed Carlos was now next to me, one hand on Isa's shoulder the other on mine. He was still in his race suit.

The marshals waved over the ambulance and they worked carefully, avoiding the back of the car. They pulled out debris from the cockpit.

"Fuck, fuck," I let out all the tears I had been holding in as Charles voice came through into my headphones. "Everything hurts, I can't feel my legs, my head, oh my God."

He was in huge amounts of pain, he must've blacked out for what felt like an hour.

"Ok, Charles, take a deep breath," Xavier sounded slightly relieved. "The marshals will get you out, try not to make any sudden movements."

"The engine is too hot," Charles voice was broken and scared. I gripped onto the wall next to me to avoid falling.

"He's going to be ok," Carlos said to me, but he didn't sound optimistic.

I didn't look at him, I couldn't pull my eyes from the screen.

"You'll be out of the car soon," his engineer reassured him.

The ambulance crew arrived. They carried a stretcher and other equipment I didn't recognise. They worked quickly and efficiently around his car. I saw Charles' helmet emerge from the car. From a distance I couldn't see any damage, I let out a slight breath. Thank God for the halo.

The paramedics blocked the view as they lifted him out of the car. The carefully lifted him in a stretcher. He looked so helpless lying there. The ambulance sped off down the track. A wave of applause rippled through the crowd but was quickly silenced by the sound of a whoosh.

Flames erupted from the remains of the car, and covered the first corner with smoke.  I blinked a few times. A few more seconds and that could've been  Charles.

My Charles.