"I..."

The woman in front of her looked complicated, as if she wanted to say something but didn't know how to say it. 

In the end, she slowly lowered her head, looked at the scattered petals on the ground, and said softly: "...I once had a daughter." 

She didn't care whether the person sitting next to her heard it or not, she seemed to mutter to herself : "She has big, bright eyes, and she was born very cute and cute, but then... I lost her..."

Zizi looked at the white flowers swaying in the wind in the distance with a light expression. did not speak.

Du Yunniang tightly clenched the embroidered handkerchief in her hands, and kept her head down, never raising it.

"I'm not a good mother. No, I don't deserve to be the mother of that child..."

Yes, she didn't.

In the past few years, she has seen a lot of things clearly, and gradually came to understand a lot of things.

Du Yunniang is not a fool, she understands in her heart.

That man doesn't love her, he just needs a woman who can help him take care of his family. The past tenderness and thoughtfulness was just a disguised reward, which was to express his satisfaction with her.

If you can't keep your heart, and immerse yourself in that little smile and kind words, thinking that this is his preference for her, then you are really stupid. 

It's just that in the past, she always felt that some things should not be calculated or investigated.

Everyone maintains the surface harmony, this day can be called a happy and smooth day.

But that layer of disguise is false, too thin and too fragile. It is like fog, and when the wind blows, it drifts away gently, revealing its original hideous and ugly true face.

There is no shortage of prostitutes in the Du family. Her father and first-mother have no affection for her. What they see is the benefits she can bring; In front of outsiders, pretending to be loving fathers and mothers to filial piety to their daughters, and pretending that sisters love each other in harmony. But what about behind the scenes? You look down on me, he looks down on you, everyone is a master at acting.

Once she lost the identity of Mrs. Hou and could no longer continue to benefit them, the Du family would immediately choose to abandon her.

These obvious things are not only known to her now, but also known to her in the past.

But after all, having lived in that "home" for so long, she still harbors that ridiculous expectation in her heart, thinking the Du family still has feelings for her married daughter. During the festivals, filial piety and help are no less. She tried her best, but when things came to an end, they were the ones who abandoned her the fastest.

For her husband, she is not irreplaceable.

If he is satisfied, he will be warm and kind; if he is unhappy, he will be cold-eyed.

Thinking that in order to win the man's approval and tenderness, she would leave her own birth child and take care of his children wholeheartedly. If only her hard work could be exchanged for a touch of sincerity, that's all.

But all things are not what you want to get.

Du Yunniang asked herself to treat Xu Dun, Xu Qian and others with sincerity, but they did not respect her, not even the least respect.

Du Yunniang was heartbroken.

Speaking of which, Xiao Shen was able to successfully seduce Xu Chengting, it was indispensable that these sons and daughters matched their own fathers behind the scenes. She is not only worthless to Xu Chengting, but also to Xu Dun, Xu Qian and others.

Du Yunniang was abandoned by the Du family, and there was a Shen family behind Xiao Shen.

Now, since she has nothing left to reuse, he naturally doesn't need to maintain even the superficial hypocrisy. Although Du Yunniang never cared about her hard work with Xu Chengting and others, these people were always calculating their pros and cons.

It was only today that she really understood.

Many things in this world can be settled, but only feelings are not allowed.

Originally it should be clean and flawless, and no blemishes are allowed; the most genuine and pure heart is not allowed to be mixed with half falsehood.

Du Yunniang's mouth showed a self-deprecating smile, laughing at herself and at others.

That impure heart will plant disaster early in the morning, not now, but tomorrow.

Involve oneself, scourge for life.

Now, it's all retribution.

•••

The study in the main courtyard was filled with familiar faces.

Now, it is unfamiliar. One by one is no longer as high-spirited as before, and the eyes are full of exhaustion and vicissitudes.

Li Chengxuan sat on the main seat and glanced sharply at everyone present.

Each has his own thoughts.

But that's okay. For now, the common good will let them do the best they can.

He placed the teacup in his hand heavily on the table beside him. First, he greeted politely, and then turned his eyes to the man sitting in the corner.

The rest of the people also looked at it, and then they all showed disgust and contempt.

think that these people used to be sons of noble families and nobles. No matter how downhearted he is now, he still pays attention to decency.

The man sitting alone in the corner had a shaggy face, messy hair, and half-stretched clothes, which were stained with alcohol and stains. He leaned lazily on the seat, holding a jug in his hand and kept pouring it into his mouth, looking like a drunk in a pub.

It's a disgrace! They disdain to be with them.

Xu Chengting looked at the man, his brows furrowed, his expression complicated.

Finally, the drunk man slammed down the jug of wine in his hand and started to make trouble. He smashed the empty wine bottle in his hand on the ground and shouted angrily, "Where's the wine! Why isn't anyone serving wine!"

Li Chengxuan didn't want to pay any attention to this person, but he pushed him to came forward. The subordinate who discouraged him was in a state of endless stance until he could drink alcohol. 

So, he said solemnly: "Brother Shen, don't worry. Since you are the host, there is no reason not to let the guests enjoy themselves"

Shen shixing Said: "Who should I be, Li family kid. You are getting more and more out of breath now, I heard that you are still an official, we all have to rely on you, come and see, yo, human model dog Such ..."

"Presumptuous!" Li Chengxuan's cronies first said, "How can you insult my master like this!!"

Many people who were attached to the Li family immediately criticized: "It's too much! to miss Brother Li a lot of kindness, good wine and good food to entertain you, but in exchange for such an attitude!"

"Brother Shen was born in a noble family, why is it now full of arrogance of people in the market!"

Someone whispered: "Since he is already a person with a broken leg, he is a waste. People are still willing to invite you to come, that is because they look down on you."

"No, he really don't know what to do!"

Shen Shixing lightly nodded his finger at the sarcastic words in his ear, mouth Li lightly hummed a little tune, as if he was drinking high.

Xu Chengting remained silent from the beginning to the end, his eyes darkened.

Although Li Chengxuan was not happy in his heart, he thought that there were more important things to discuss today, so, he let him go.