"This episode of the program "What, where and when?" I dedicate to the founder — Cooper Nelson," the host, a black Scottish terrier, announced to a live audience, his voice echoing through the grand amphitheatre. "He was the most influential figure in our program. He always said that knowledge is a weapon and that we must arm ourselves with it to face the unknown. But he's gone. Now we have to keep the tradition. Until then, hello, this is Allen Duncan. Let's start the show!"

The audience cheered, their voices rising like a crescendo of barks, chirps, and roars, filling the vast space with a warm, vibrant energy. The stage lights grew brighter, casting sharp shadows across the five contestants sitting in a semicircle, each eagerly awaiting the challenge.

"Let's introduce our contestants..." Allen began, his tail wagging excitedly. "First up, we have Wu Weifang, the panda, Aurelio Fernandez, the armadillo, Koby Gilbert, the koala, Penelope Prentice, the quail, and finally, Rayvon Omondi, the hippopotamus. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome them with a round of applause!"

The contestants were all looking at each other, excited and a little nervous. They knew the reputation of the show and knew it was going to be a tough intellectual challenge. The big amphitheatre was packed with beasts of all sizes and shapes, their eyes fixed on the stage, waiting for a show that would entertain and educate them.

"Let's start the first round!" the presenter said, starting the spinning top. This device helped select the first question.

"And while the first question is being chosen, I will ask questions about the life of the participants themselves." Allen Duncan turned to the panda. "Wu Weifang, tell us, what is your job?"

"I specialize in Traditional Chinese Medicine," Wu Weifang replied calmly.

"Are you sure TCM works?" Allen quipped with a twinkle in his eye. "I mean, the scientific community has proven it to be pretty... unconventional."

"I don't know much about science," Wu Weifang shrugged. "But I've seen it help a lot of the animals in our abode, and that's all the proof I need."

And so, the top came to rest, pointing to the first question.

"So, our first question is from Abigail McKinnon, the border collie from Occitania, which is in the European Province. She's a PhD candidate, and she's got quite the brain teaser for you," Allen announced, his voice crackling with excitement.

"This city was founded in the year 43 AD by the Romans. Its name was almost unchanged. This city is the second largest in Europe as a whole. In 2012, the Olympic Games were held in this city for the third time. This city also has the oldest subway."

The audience held their breath.

"You know the rules," Duncan reminded them. "What's the answer?"

He pressed the button and something made a buzz. The air in the amphitheatre became thick with tension. The animals looked at each other with confused expressions.

"You know, I think this is Madrid! It was founded by the Romans, wasn't it?" Koby whispered to his teammates.

"Nah, it's gotta be Rome," Aurelio the armadillo chimed in with a frown. "You know, they had the Romans and the Colosseum and all that good stuff."

"I think it's probably Paris," said Penelope the quail.

"And I think it's Berlin."

"And I..."

But time had already run out, and the contestants looked at each other with a mix of surprise and relief.

"Now what will your answer be?" Allen announced.

Someone pushed Aurelio in front and he had to speak. He took a deep breath and talked confidently. "Let's just say it's Rome. That's where the Roman Empire was big, right?"

Allen looked at him, his eyebrows raised. "Interesting choice," he said, scribbling the answer down. "Now, let's see the actual answer..."

He took another sheet out of the envelope and began to read out the answer: "The city mentioned in the question is indeed a place of great historical significance, founded by the Romans and known for its rich culture and contributions to civilization, and its name is... London!"

A collective gasp filled the amphitheatre. The crowd looked around in shock, and the contestants' faces dropped. Aurelio's confidence was washed away like sand in the river, and he sank back into his chair.

Allen continued to read with a straight face: "The city of London was known by different names, but which sound completely the same: "Londinium" and "Lundenwic". It is the second largest in Europe and has indeed hosted the Olympic Games three times, in 1908, 1948, and 2012. Also, it does have one of the oldest subway systems in the world, the London Underground, which opened in 1863... One point for the audience!"

The animals were quite surprised by this turn of events, and it seems they were not very happy. However, the show had to go on. "Alright, let's not dwell on our mistakes," Allen Duncan said cheerfully. "Let's move on to the next round."

The spinning top twirled to life once more.

"And while we're on the topic of life, I wanted to ask Aurelio about something. I heard that you were unemployed and didn't finish high school. Was there a reason for that? Maybe your family needed your help?"

"Don't worry about it! That wasn't why I did it!" Aurelio the armadillo laughed a bit defensively. "I was just so bored and couldn't take it anymore. You know how I feel about studying, it's overrated. I can learn everything myself, right?"

"What do you mean by that?" Duncan probed, his curiosity piqued.

"I mean, life's meaning is in having fun, isn't it?" Aurelio said, flashing a grin that revealed his slightly chipped teeth. "You know, I kinda hate geography, I mean... it's just so... dull. But I know my way around a good party!"

Finally, the spinning top slowed and pointed at the second envelope.

"This question is from Reginald Carson, the raven from the Appalachia in the American Province. He works as a teacher..." Allen announced, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he held up the envelope. "It's a bit of a doozy, folks. Here we go..."

Duncan started reading aloud: "This animal — or rather, a bird — is one of the smartest on the planet. They create and use simple tools such as sticks and branches to get food or extract objects from narrow crevices. They can learn and imitate the sounds of other animals, as well as environmental sounds and even human speech. Name the creature."

He pressed the button, and something buzzed yet again.

The audience was all leaning forward, waiting to see if the contestants could recover from their first-round mistake. The panda was looking thoughtful, and the koala had his eyes narrowed. The quail's head was tilted to the side.

"I think it's a parrot," Rayvon whispered.

"No, it's gotta be a dolphin," Koby suggested

"But it's not a bird! It's a fish!" exclaimed Penelope.

"I think it might be a crow," Wu Weifang, the panda, said with a hint of doubt. "They're quite clever, aren't they?"

"But crows can't talk!"

"Well, I still..."

"Time's up!" Allen Duncan interrupted with a chuckle. "Let's hear your answer, Mr. Gilbert."

"I think it's a dolphin!" Koby exclaimed, his voice echoing across the grand amphitheatre.

"Are you- are you sure about that?!?" Allen Duncan couldn't hide the incredulity in his voice.

"Yes, I AM!" Koby, the koala, retorted, his fur bristling slightly. The audience chuckled at the mistake, and the tension in the big amphitheatre thickened like fur on a cold winter night.

"Ahem, well, uuuh... Let's see the answer..." Allen Duncan said, trying to suppress his laughter. He read the card with exaggerated gravity.

"'Let it be known to you that the answer is a raven. Not only we can use tools, but we can mimic human speech and even reproduce some everyday sounds...' But alas, the point goes to the audience!"

The audience erupted into laughter, the sound echoing through the grand amphitheatre like a peal of thunder.

"Since you haven't won a single round yet," Allen said, his tone sympathetic, "this round will be crucial for you. If the point is in your favor, you'll be back in the game 'til the end. If the point won't be, well, let's just say the audience will be ahead of you."

He started the spinning top again.

"So, uh, I guess I should keep going with the questions. Hey, Reyvon, I hear you're into astrology. Is that right?"

"Indeed it is!" the hippopotamus, Rayvon, responded with a broad smile. "I just love astrology... or, how do people call it, astronomy, and I..."

"Wait, are you sure they call it like that?" Duncan interrupted, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"Is something wrong?" Rayvon looked confused, his smile slipping slightly.

The dog whispered something in his ear.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ASTRONOMY AND ASTROLOGY ARE NOT THE SAME THING?!"

Hippo was losing it. He was so mad that he just threw his chair aside and stood up, making the floor shake a little with his heavy weight. Two crocodiles tried to hold him down, but he was just too strong. "It's all bullshit!" he yelled, his face turning bright red. "The stars are talking to me, telling me the future!"

"Well, while our employees are trying to calm down the hippo, let's talk to Penelope. Ms. Prentice, are you a religious person?"

"You know, I've joined the Church of Scientology recently," Penelope, the quail, said with a serene smile. "They have a very enlightening approach to the universe and our place in it. And they also have those cool devices to cleanse your soul! By the way, do you need one?"

She pulled out a little device that kind of looked like a walkie-talkie crossed with a hair dryer. "This is an E-Meter," she said with a proud tone in her voice. "It measures your body's electrical current and helps you find inner peace and clarity."

"Ahem, no thanks, I'm quite content with my own fur," Allen Duncan quipped, raising his paw to decline the offered E-Meter. "Anyway, Mr. Gilbert, and who do you work for?"

"For my dad, man," Koby the koala replied, his voice calm amid the chaos. "You know, I had a rough start like Aurelio. I mean, school just wasn't for me. And oh, because of my bad grades, I got kicked out. But my dad has a big company. And I'm the only one in his will. So I have to work for him. As a, uh, what's that called? The pre-CEO? Yeah, I'm the pre-CEO!"

Allen just rolled his eyes. Then, he looked at the rolling top which had come to a stop. "Alright, let's get back to the game," he announced, his voice a mix of amusement and professionalism.

There was a black square painted on the third envelope.

"This question is from Dolphin, the proposed mascot of 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia. As of now, he lives in the Vostok, which is in European Province and works as sports commentator. And it looks like his question involves a black box. Black box to the studio!"

The audience watched as a black box, no bigger than a breadbox, was brought out by a pair of penguins.

"What is in the black box is an image of the continent discovered in 1492 by Christopher Columbus. This continent is known for its diverse wildlife, vast landscapes, and significant contributions to global cuisine. Name this continent," Allen Duncan read from the card with a straight face, despite the anticipation hanging in the air.

He pressed the button and something buzzed. The atmosphere was so tense, you could've cut it with a knife.

"It's Antarctica!" Aurelio said in a low voice.

"Nah, its Australia!" Koby exclaimed, his ears perking up.

"No, Australia was discovered back in the Soviet Union!" Penelope interjected, flapping her wings.

"Then it's gotta be Europe!" Weifang offered calmly, his eyes never leaving the black box.

"Why?"

"Because Europe has diverse wildlife, right?"

"Time's up!" Allen announced, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Your answer?"

Wu Weifang calmly chimed in, unphased by the crazy answers that had come before. "We're going with Europe," he said in a steady voice.

The audience held its collective breath. The buzzer sounded, and Allen Duncan revealed the actual answer with a dramatic flourish. "Ladies and gentlemen, the continent discovered in 1492 by Christopher Columbus is..."

He took something out of the box. It turned out to be a map of the Americas. "It's America!" The audience was roaring with laughter as the contestants just stared at each other, with a mix of shock and confusion on their faces.

"Well, there you have it, folks. You're out! But don't worry," Allen said, his voice full of sarcasm. "You guys provided us with some great entertainment. And who knows? Maybe next time, you'll do your homework and actually know what you're talking about when you come on this show!"

The contestants weren't so amused. They looked at each other with a mix of disbelief and irritation on their faces.

"Earth is flat! I saw it online!" Aurelio shouted.

But now, the participants have already left. Although... Is this the end?

"Ladies and gentlemen, there is something I need you to know about..." Allen began, "All those people — panda, armadillo, koala, quail, and hippopotamus — they are actually the actors. Yes, we had a script. But those people who asked questions, and those types who were played by the actors, are quite real. Astronomy, traditional medicine, cults, ignorance — all this and similar things spoil our world. It is with these things that founder Cooper Nelson fought all his life. He believed that only knowledge can save us from such nonsense. And we decided to show you a world in which there is no science, no truth, only ignorance and beliefs. And we did it so that you don't become like them. I hope it was a good show for you. The host, Allen Duncan, was with you. Thank you for being with us tonight."