Stephen strange was checking his phone – just a quick glance while driving – when the pain started.

It shot up his hand, burning in the worst way. It spread out around his body while the car veered off the road.

Distantly he knew he was out of control, but you should try and get control back before he crashed. Except he also had the unbearable pain in his chest.

He drove the car over a cliff.

(But he saw the message)

(Tony was missing)

(And when Stephen woke up next, his hands-)

==NMB==

Stephen tried stretching out his fingers. Pain shot up the knuckles. For days and days he had tried and tried to stretch out his fingers without the pain. But so far no such luck.

(He would rather focus on the pain than the thought of Tony.)

(Stranded)

(Alone)

(Lost)

(Possibly even-)

Stephen again tries to clench his hands without pain.

He fails.

==NMB==

Stephen had rarely experienced failure.

He rarely took patients he knew he couldn't save. It had been a cause of endless grief to his friend (and ex), Christine.

It had actually started long before that.

He had a brother, and a sister, once.

They had died.

She would have been alright if he had only-

His brother might still be alive if-

Stephen refused to fail again.

Hence he earned his PhD and MD at the same time.

He would never fail again.

Ever.

==NMB==

Stephen stares at Loki Laufeyson sometimes...in between wasting his time in bed or waiting for another surgery or on nights when it gets too lonely.

(Tony had been missing for a month.)

He wonders where that Soulmate of his must be. Everyone had heard about Tony Stark disappearing by now, so this Soulmate should have at least. Especially if Loki Laufeyson felt the same pain that Stephen had. Doubly so with the result of his hands.

Stephen remembered times he'd trace the elegant letters, the swirls of the vowels with the sharpness to the curves in the 'L's.

He wonders if Loki Laufeyson is alright.

(Or if maybe- just maybe-Loki Laufeyson had heard about them.

And wanted nothing to do with them)

==NMB==

One day, Stephen heard of a miracle.

The next, he met Mr Pangborn.

The next, he was on a flight to Nepal.

(Tony had been missing for two months)

(Loki Laufeyson hadn't come)

(Stephen did his best to ignore those two facts- despite seeing them every time he stared at his wrists.)

==NMB==

After his first meeting with the Ancient One, he could hardly believe it. Magic. Magic was real- more than that it was practised. On Earth!

The Ancient One had been open in her discussions- explaining the mystic arts as well as showing Stephen the many mysteries of the universe.

They spoke of Soulmarks at one point. Stephen had tried to steer the conversation away from them- away from the one missing and the one hiding from them- still the Ancient One persisted.

("I am willing to say that they are very determined men. You are much the same, yes?")

Stephen sought to discover them- the secrets of the Mystic Arts. He poured himself into the books. Absorbed all the history and spells and theory. They made no sense! Mystic Arts followed none of the laws of science by which Stephen knew them.

Tony wouldn't know either. He'd probably be pulling his hair out by now.

(Could Loki Laufeyson-)

He questioned lessons.

He questioned Mordo.

Hell he back talked at Wong all day

(The same way Tony would back talk Happy or Rhodes)

However...in all that studying...Stephen never checked his phone.

He heard it buzzing- but he wasn't ready.

His hands were still broken.

He doubted anything had changed. Studying at Karmar-Taj was better than fretting in Malibu.

(Tony had been found two weeks ago)

(Loki Laufeyson had fallen one week ago)

==NMB==

After a near miss Stephen had figured out Sling Rings.

And swore if he never felt the cold again, it would be too soon.

(Loki Laufeyson was still falling)

==NMB==

Stephen Strange was sitting in his room, studying the texts before going to bed.

(Tony Stark had been found two months ago)

Stephen wondered- briefly- if he should check his phone.

The thing had died, some time ago. Stephen hadn't checked it- not since his car accident which cost him hands.

He glanced at the phone- the Starkphone he'd been given. He remembered finding it in his office. Tony had been so insulted at his old phone, he'd traded it out for a top of the line StarkPhone. One that had way more upgrades than Stephen needed.

Tony loved upgrading tech.

Stephen- a fellow workaholic- could appreciate that in his fellow man.

But he couldn't bring himself to charge the phone. There was too much work to be done.

==NMB==

*beep*

"Stephen. It's Pepper. It's about Tony. He- his humvee was- Stephen please call me back."

*beep*

"Stephen! I just heard about your accident! What hospital are you in? JARVIS can't find it."

*184 messages*

*139 missed calls*

*114 voicemails*

*18 emails*

*beep*

"We found him. James just called- oh my god they found him. He's coming home."

*beep*

"Dr Strange, Sir is requesting you call him. There is an incident at the mansion in Malibu. It appears your other Soulmate has arrived."

"Stephen goddamned Strange answer your mother fucking phone! I gave it to you for a fucking purpose you SHIT! Why can't anyone find you huh? HUH?! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU!?"

*beep*

"Apparently Loki thought his last name was Odinson. Weird. When are you coming home? Just checking."

*beep*

"I don't have a heart anymore. Did you know that? I know your hands got fucked- could feel it when it happened. Did you feel it? Whatever."

*beep*

"Stephen. I- fuck. I don't know. Are you even hearing these?"

*beep*

"Inbox full."

*4 new updates to install*

*350+messages*

*350+ missed calls*

*350+ voicemails*

*1000+* emails

==NMB==

Loki Laufeyson had landed.

But that wasn't a good thing.

==NMB==

Stephen was studying a book on forbidden rituals. Well not forbidden- just really, really frowned upon.

On his neck was the Eye of Agamotto. The necklace he may or may not have stolen. What are they gonna do, throw him in wizard jail? That didn't exist. There weren't any dementors around. Ha. Take that. Whatcha gonna do now wizard cops?

(Tony Stark had read Harry Potter. He was a 27 year old man when the books came out. Why the hell did he read those? What did it matter that he was a Ravenclaw?)

(Stephen Strange was a Slytherin)

(...shut up.)

He read over the spell mechanics. It had a spell structure that Stephen had seen in other complicated spells, but it was routine in the practice.

Stephen stood up. He stared at the apple core he had eaten while studying the runes. He performed the spell to open the Eye of Agamotto. A green glow came out from it. Stephen paid little attention to that. The spell work itself was more important than the factors just know.

He cast the spell. It caused a gauntlet of green around his forearm. Very different, when he was so used to magic of an orange-ish hue. Stephen continued on. If the Eye glowed green, then this spell glowing green must be normal too.

He waved his hand over the apple. It reformed to wholeness.

Stephen was impressed. Of course it had worked. Stephen would never fail at a spell.

He moved his hand the other direction. The apple vanished bite by bite, until the core itself remained then rotted away.

Stephen moved his hand to the middle. The apple was restored to it's original setting of minus one bite.

He'd mastered a time travel spell.

(Stephen hadn't noticed his first though-after this- was "Tony will be thrilled...or jealous, I honestly can't tell which.")

Stephen was so caught up in his glee at a job well done, he hadn't noticed Wong or Mordo approaching from behind.

==NMB==

Well...Tony had always been up for kinky sex.

That was what Stephen thought, when he first saw the complex jail that held down Kaecilius.

Stephen crushed that thought down. Crushed it down hard.

(But for the first time in an age- thinking about Tony didn't hurt.)

In order to break his mind out from the gutter, Stephen took the gag off the sorcerer.

"You cannot stop this, Mr. Doctor." Kaecilius told Stephen.

"Why...look, I don't even know what 'this' is." Stephen remarked.

"It's the end and the beginning. The many becoming the few, becoming the One." Kaecilius explained, which was about as helpful as a four year old explaining rocket science.

"Look, if you're not going to start making sense, I'm just going to have to put this thing back on." Stephen told him, holding up the gag again.

"Tell me, Mr. Doctor-" Kaecilius began.

"Alright, look. My name is Dr. Stephen Strange." Stephen stressed each word of his title. The man had already gotten it wrong so many times today. There's only so much insult a man can take.

("You know, Stephen, if you just took my name-" "That is the worst proposal I have ever heard. Ever. Also don't propose. This is literally our first date.")

"You are a doctor?" Kaecilius replied. His diseased eyes widened in surprise.

"Yes." Stephen answered, terse.

"A scientist. You understand the laws of nature." Kaecilius realized. He actually sounded hopeful. Stephen had the awful feeling- the same feeling you get when you realize it was a Jehovah's Witness at your door, not the pizza man. "All things age. All things die. In the end, our sun burns out, our universe grows cold and perishes. But the Dark Dimension...it's a place beyond time."

Stephen sighed. "That's it. I'm putting this thing back on."

"This world doesn't have to die, Doctor." Kaecilius told Stephen. The doctor gave pause to the remark. Any prevention of death deserved at least a moment of thought. "This world can take its rightful place among so many others, as part of the One. The great and beautiful One. And we can all live forever."

Unless it was all dark wizard bullshit propaganda. Come on, Voldemort did a better job with this.

"Really? What do you have to gain out of this New Age dimensional utopia?" Stephen questioned.

"The same as you. The same as everyone. Life. Eternal life." Kaecilius revealed. His expression now wistful, as he thought of the eternal life all would be granted. "People think in terms of good and evil, but really, time is the true enemy of us all. Time kills everything."

"What about the people you killed?" Stephen countered.

"Tiny, momentary specks within an indifferent universe." Kaecilius replied. Stephen wanted to pull out his hair. How could you promise to protect all life in existence, yet also treat it so callously? "Yes. You see, you see what we're doing? The world is not what it ought to be. Humanity longs for the eternal, for a world beyond time, because time is what enslaves us. Time is an insult. Death is an insult. Doctor...We don't seek to rule this world. We seek to save it, to hand it over to Dormammu, who is the intent of all evolution, the Why of all existence."

"The Sorcerer Supreme defends existence."

"What was it that brought you to Kamar-Taj, Doctor? Was it enlightenment? Power?" Kaecilius questioned.

Stephen's hands ached.

(His chest burned while the car crashed- nothing to do with the accident- everything to do with that text)

(And recently- just recently- barely one hour ago- Stephen's body. As though someone was sticking a hundred needles all over his body. He assumed it was just stress from the attacks on the Sanctums.)

(He was wrong.)

(So very, very wrong.)

"You came to be healed, as did we all." Kaecilius spoke. He glanced at where Stephen's fingers twitched along the Soulmate bracelet. "To find your soulmate? Thinking we would lead you to them, or show you a spell which does so?"

Stephen found he couldn't deny Kaecilius.

He hadn't gotten that far in the books yet.

"Kamar-Taj is a place that collects broken things." Kaecilius went on. "We all come with the promise of being healed, but instead, the Ancient One gives us parlor tricks. The real magic she keeps for herself. Have you ever wondered how she managed to live this long?"

"I... I saw the rituals in the book of Cagliostro." Stephen admitted.

Kaecilius was delight by the admission. "So, you know. The ritual gives me the power to overthrow the Ancient One and tear her Sanctums down, to let the Dark Dimension in. Because what the Ancient One hoards, Dormammu gives freely. Life, everlasting. He is not the destroyer of worlds, Doctor, he is the savior of worlds."

It sounded good. Oh it sounded so very good. Too good. Stephen could see why all the other sorcerers abandoned their training to side with Kaecilius on this. But Stephen could only see the logic of it.

For all that his mind had been open, a few ideas were held firmly in place.

"No. I mean, come on. Look at your face." Stephen reminded him. He waved his hand at the dark scars burnt into the insane man's eyes. "Dormammu made you a murderer. Just how good can his kingdom be?"

Kaecilius chuckled.

"You think that's funny?" Stephen asked.

"No. No, Doctor. What's funny is that you've lost your sling ring." Kaecilius noted.

Stephen barely had time to hate him before Kaecilius leapt for it.

==NMB==

At this exact point in time, thousands of miles away, Tony Stark was having her another press conference. More concerning the attack on Stark Industries the night before.

==NMB==

And Loki continued to fight.

Fight for-

Fight for-

For...there was something important...some burden...

==NMB==

Stephen floated to the Ancient One. The Sorcerer Supreme was looking out at the New York skyline. A storm had been raging, quiet and calm until now.

"What are you doing? You're dying!" Stephen scolded. "You have to return to your body now. You don't have time."

"Time is relative. Your body hasn't even hit the floor yet." The Ancient One remarked. Stephen hated admitted she had a point there. "I've spent so many years peering through time, looking at this exact moment. But I can't see past it. I've prevented countless terrible futures. And after each one, there's always another. And they all lead here, but never further."

"You think this is where you die." Stephen realized. His stomach seemed to...fall out from under him.

"Do you wonder what I see in your future?" The Ancient One asked.

"No." Stephen answered. The Ancient One gave him a look. "Yes."

"I never saw your future. Only its possibilities." The Ancient One answered. Stephen has to hold back an undignified snort. "You have such a capacity for goodness. You always excelled, but not because you crave success, but because of your fear of failure."

"It's what made me a great doctor." Stephen remarked.

"It's precisely what kept you from greatness." The Ancient One countered. "Arrogance and fear still keep you from learning the simplest and most significant lesson of all."

"Which is?" Stephen prompted.

"It's not about you." The Ancient One told him.

And didn't he just feel like a child, hand being swatted from the cookie jar.

"When you first came to me, you asked me how I was able to heal Jonathan Pangborn." The Ancient One explained. "I didn't. He channels dimensional energy directly into his own body."

"He uses magic to walk." Stephen reasoned.

"Constantly." The Ancient One confirmed. "He had a choice, to return to to his own life or to serve something greater than himself."

"So, I could have my hands back again? My old life?" Stephen asked. He had wanted so badly to go back to being a doctor, to succeeding at saving people once again.

(To save Tony)

"You could. And the world would be all the lesser for it." The Ancient One told him. "You also asked me about your Soulmates."

Stephen hesitated. He hadn't dared give himself hope on that. "Yeah. I remember."

"There's no spell to find them for you. Even if there was, the Eye would certainly not be able to use it." The Ancient One explained. "That doesn't mean I haven't seen them, of course."

"You did?"

"Yes. Tony is going to be furious with you." The Ancient One mused. "You've not answered any of his phone calls."

"He hasn't ca-" Stephen stopped himself. When his mind processed her words, he could start crying. "They found him?"

"Last July." The Ancient One answered. "Loki is still missing. You just missed him."

"What? I- what?" Stephen gawked.

"Another reason Tony is furious with you." The Ancient One mused. "Don't worry. You both will fix him. A majority of the possibilities led to that."

"Fix him? What do you mean?" Stephen asked.

The Ancient One turned to look at him. "You feel it, don't you? The pain he is in? It's a slow pain, at this point, but very strong."

Once again, Stephen felt someone had pulled a rug out from beneath him. He could feel that pain she was talking about. The needles all along his skin, phantom echoes of being beaten, worse yet he felt pain anew in his hands.

(Burden...burden...burden... had his Soulmates been the burden? Had he burdened them somehow? It wouldn't surprise him if so. He was an incredibly difficult person.)

("I am Iron Man.")

"Stephen. It will work out." The Ancient One assured him. She looked back out on the skyline. "I've hated drawing power from the Dark Dimension. But as you well know, sometimes one must break the rules in order to serve the greater good."

Stephen, mind whirling from all her revelations tonight, could only bring himself to say "Mordo won't see it that way."

While the man had become something like a friend, Stephen could clearly see how Mordo wasn't one to see rules like these broken as a good thing. Or at the very least a necessary equal.

"Mordo's soul is rigid and unmovable, forged by the fires of his youth." The Ancient One explained. "He needs your flexibility, just as you need his strength. Only together do you stand a chance of stopping Dormammu."

"I'm not ready." Stephen pleaded.

"No one ever is. We don't get to choose our time. Death is what gives life meaning. To know your days are numbered, your time is short." The Ancient One informed him. "You'd think after all this time I'd be ready. But look at me, stretching one moment out into a thousand, just so I can watch the rain."

Then...before Stephen could ask any more, she was gone.

Stephen looked down at his arm. That pain had shown up again- slow but strong.

(Stephen has