A/N: Special thanks to brave-little-fantasy for the word~ UvU

I hope the ending didn't suck. //dies.

And that Aomine isn't OOC. XD

______

Cockamamy
(adj.) ridiculous; silly; implausible

~♥~

It is ridiculous to even think that you’d be in a decent relationship with Toou’s arrogant ace.

“Daiki, you bastard! You promised me that you’re not going to buy any more of this—this—“ You pointed at the discovered pile of newly-bought magazines with women wearing explicit clothes on their covers.  You glared daggers at the nervous-looking basketball player, demanding an explanation.

“I can’t help it. I’m also a man. We have special needs,” he answered dismissively after a moment as he brought his arms behind his indigo-haired head and lay down comfortably on the large pillow scattered on his room’s floor, his face twisting into a frown which screamed that he couldn’t care any less.

Your blood boiled, rage flowing in your veins and soon filled your body. The bastard wasn’t even sorry! Your hands balled up into tight fists and your face crumpled into an angered frown, you sat back down on the floor, his uncaring expression hidden by the small table in front of you with a lot of papers and books on top of it. Who knew a tutor session with your dumb boyfriend would end up with another argument?

“But you’re always like this! You’d say you’d do something but then you’d end up not doing it!” you reproached further, waiting for him to just say even the softest apology and to realize that he’s in the wrong in the current situation. Maybe that would at least lessen the flames burning inside your body.

“Haaa? You always ask for the most impossible things. There’s no way I could do them,” he replied in a bored, exasperated tone, like he didn’t care at all. You did know that he’s like this with the sport he loves, but you didn’t know he’s also like this with the girl he claims to love. Or was he really serious when he confessed to you? Doubt slowly eating away your frustration, you realized that maybe, or most probably, he never really had any intention to take you seriously from the start. Maybe there's only one thing left to do...

“Well, then!” you started as you breathed out a sigh, your voice sounding cheerful while what you felt was the complete opposite, “Since this isn’t even working out, let’s just break up.”

He suddenly sits up, wide-eyed and jaw-dropped with your suggestion. “H-Hey, are you serious?!”

You shrugged as you gave up, your eyes scanning the science book in front of you. The diagram of the elements bonding with one another to form a useful molecule immediately registering to your mind. “Yep,” you answered, popping the ‘p’. “Let’s just finish this study session and end this. Now, what’s the molecular composition of glucose?” You asked him in all seriousness, and you were already anticipating a wrong answer.

“O-Oi, _____! You are not breaking up with me!” he exclaimed, panic written all over his face. His dark blue eyes were on your studying being, silently pleading that it was just one of your cruel jokes through the looks he was currently giving you.

“I, as a matter of fact, am breaking up with you,” you answered cheerily, grinning triumphantly at his uneasy self. Well, that showed that the arrogant idiot actually cared.

“I’ll do a better job as a boyfriend—J-Just don’t leave me!" He promised once again, both his voice and his face now brimming with desperation.

“I’ve heard that phrase way too often.” You wagged your hand dismissively with a distant grin on your face. You could actually get used to having the upper hand of an argument such as this.

“I’ll treat you with anything you want in your favorite café!”

You stopped to stare at him in disbelief, and you saw relief showing up on his face. That was one thing you couldn’t let go. You've been craving for that chocolate cake and that frappe for ages! “…anything?” you inquired a little silently, ashamed that you were currently letting him bribe you with food. At the moment, that didn't really matter. The idea of getting to save more money was extremely favorable.

“Yeah.” It was now his turn to grin, though you could tell that the nervousness he felt earlier was still there.

“…Fine.”

"I fucking love y--"

"But burn the magazines."

And that, folks, is how the two of you managed make your seemingly impossible relationship to work.

Extended ending:

"________?" He peered at you as your eyes remained on the book, awfully determined to make him learn all the lessons needed to pass the exam.

"Hm?" you answered distractedly.

"For the record, you look better than those girls in my R-18 magazines." You could hear the smirk on his voice, but you weren't backing down that easily.

"But they have better bodies, don't they?" He uneasily looked away from your menacing grin. "Don't lie, Daiki."

"...yeah..." He scratched his nape, beads of sweat forming on his forehead.

You huffed and gave him a sweet smile. "Well, then. For comparing me to those girls, you're not getting any kisses this month," you announced in finality, enjoying the dumbfounded look on his face.

"Aw, come on!"