"Oh God, B!!! It has been so long, I missed you!!!" Merina gives me a strong hug as she opens her door's house and I chuckle breathlessly hugging her back. Ah, she feels like home... my best friend is still here.

"I know you bitch, don't ghost us like that ever again, got it?" I tell her and she sighs.

"Yes, I know I've been a bit lost. I have so much to tell you!" She squeals, takes my hand and tugs me into her home. I admire the golden-framed mirrors, different sized crystal chandeliers that hang in the ceiling, the different paintings and ornaments before we finally reach the kitchen.

Our ritual doesn't go missing as I see Meri preparing a pot of coffee. Mrs. Rogers walks in and gasps in surprise. "Oh, Blair! It's been long since you last came here to visit us, how have you been, sweetie?"

"Very well, thank you, Mrs. R. How are you all?"

"Oh, fine too, thank you. How's your mom?"

Sad and bitter as always. "Good, she's been good as well," I smile politely back at my best friend's mom.

"Oh, dear, I love you're here. Between us, I prefer you much more than those girls Merina has been hanging out with, they're so noisy,"

At that, my eyebrows shoot up in surprise and see Merina sharply turn from the stove to face us. I look at her, and she has an unreadable expression for the rest of the world, but not for me. She didn't want me to know she's been hanging out with them here.

Okay...

"Yeah, they've come around to get ready for parties and things of the sort," Merina shrugs and turns again.

Parties? She never told us about any of them. Ouch.

"Okay, well ladies I'll leave you both to it. I'm going to pick your dad up at work Meri, we're going out tonight. Lock the doors!"

"Yes, mom, have a nice date!"

After some seconds, the sound of footsteps and car keys dangling comes to a stop after the door bangs shut. We're alone in the kitchen while the coffee machine prepares our beverages, as we both look at the ground, the cabinets, the fridge...

Grabbing both of my ovaries I break the silence. "You never told us about the parties, who went?"

"Oh, tons of people. But you don't know any of them, so I never told you guys about it, you'd just get bored," She shrugs it off and I feel like I've been shoved out of the way.

"Oh... well, we could've met people there, is not a big deal," I shrug and Merina looks at me with guilt.

"I'm sorry B, I really thought you guys would be uncomfortable. They were all rich, cool kids from Mountain High and it didn't really seem your type of scene... and I went with Jenny, Nats and Gabbie so..." She shrugs. My type of scene? "You wouldn't have gone anyway,"

"Hm..." I nod my head. Everything she's saying is kind of right but plainly excluding every one of us and not giving us the choice to decide whether or not we wanted to go with her... I don't know what to think.

Once the coffee is served in our cups and cookies are placed on a plate, we go to her room and sit on the bed. Merina squeals and stands up in front of me. I look at her deranged smile with rounded eyes, in the mid-bite of a cookie with my coffee cup held high.

"Don't freak out okay? Listen to me first, then I'll answer any question you want,"

Slowly I nod my head and brace myself for what's to come. Merina inhales and exhales two times before holding in all her breath and exclaiming: "KYLE AND I ARE TOGETHER FOR REAL!"

My cookie falls on my lap, my mouth's agape and my eyes open even more. She's... she's actually dating Kyle?! Like, the Devil Kyle? The guy that practically blackmailed her with nudes? What the fuck?!

"You're..." I'm at a loss of words and she squeals making me wonder further what the hell is actually wrong with her.

Meri sits back down beside me. "Yes, B! He told me he loved me a week ago. He said he was jealous of Liam, that he was sorry he distanced himself all these years and that he wanted to get me back... get us back. We grew so close these past few weeks since he tried to kiss me at the boat, you'll see for yourself! Our friendship kind of rekidlend-"

"Rekindled" I correct her but my comment goes unnoticed.

"and we're the same... even better! Because now we're friends but he's also my... my lover you know? He's my best friend and my boyfriend,"

"Okay but... he said the L word?" I squeal, unbelieving.

"Well... no, but he said he had feelings for me, long since were friends in middle school and you know what it means, it's obvious! In movies guys always say that before the drop the L-word sometime afterward,"

"Well, yes but it's just puppy love now, Meri!" I exclaim. She's being irrational, he has lied and denied her for years, then he blackmails her and she falls in love? Bullshit!

"What? No!" Meri shakes her head vehemently.

"Yes! Think about it with a straight head, Meri. You guys are completely different people now. Middle school feelings aren't the same as what you could feel for somebody now,"

"Like when you liked Cole?"

"Exactly! That doesn't compare to the way I like Mason-" I cut myself, my eyes widen. Merina gasps, her eyes widen. We stare at each other for two seconds. I said it. I exploded. 

I FUCKING SAID IT.

"AHHH!" Merina and I scream in unison, not believing what has just come out of my mouth. I said I liked him, I admitted it and now I'm doomed.

"YOU LIKE MASON REID! I KNEW IT!" Merina has a fangirl smile that could rival any One Direction fan's watching a live concert. I'm in shock, I can't even speak to defend myself or come up with an excuse.

I'm speechless.

"Say something, B! This is the first time you've liked somebody like... seriously. When did you notice? You weren't even going to tell me, were you? You were going to keep it to yourself, you damn woman! This was a slip-up!" Merina cackles loudly and I cover my mouth.

"I'm fucking gone," I whisper and Merina hugs me, still laughing.

"That's love, girlfriend, and Mason Reid has finally introduced you to it. It's not bad, he's really hot, you got a fine ass taste for being the first guy that really gets your attention. You're picky as hell,"

I snap out of it. Love? NO. No, no, no, no, no! "Merina I can't... I can't like him!"

"Why not? You guys have something brewing with each other I could feel it since you started with your tutoring sessions," She air quotes with her fingers and I narrow my eyes.

"We have nothing, we're friends. He's never going to like me like I-" I slap a hand over my mouth but it's too late.

"Like you do! Say it! Say it, B! Get it out of your chest! Hell, this is historical, this is the first time you've had a crush, and it is a big one!"

"Don't tell anyone! Not Jenny, not Nats or Gabbie... not even Camille or the other can know. I already feel like an imbecile saying it to you!"

"Yeah, you sound worse than I do,"

We both quiet down, before bursting out laughing. We both know that's not true.

"Yeah, 'cause blackmail is so hot right now," I chuckle and we both sober up. A phone ringing makes Merina sharply turn and take her phone from her nightstand.

"Oh, it's Natalie!" She answers right away. Our moment's over. As I watch her talk I witness her voice's tone changing, her laugh pitching, her words being picked out to formulate something that Natalie wants to hear. I see it. I see what Liam was talking about. The way she's talking about some loser has me cringing in place and she becomes another one of the group.

"Oh, no. I'm free, it's okay. I'm doing nothing now,"

Nothing? Being with me is doing nothing? Wow... I don't want to be here anymore but I want to wait for her to notice she hurt me. I wait two minutes, five, ten, fifteen and the call is still connected. When twenty minutes have passed by I lose it and stand up. Merina eyes my and I motion for the door and mouth her I'm leaving.

She simply nods and I grit my teeth and mask my hurt. She stands while laughing into the phone and accompanies me to the door, never noticing my frown, my stiff posture, the abrupt way I decided to leave... She stands in the doorway, waiting for me to go down the porch's steps, without a hug or a simple goodbye. She waves at me when I turn around having gone down the steps and closes the front door.

I'm afraid Liam's right. I'm afraid I'm losing my best friend.