A/N: Please do not play the song yet.

ASHLEY

The day has finally come to an end. We've wrapped up everything, and the video is ready for worldwide release. This was my first time, directing an actual video, even though it was training. Emily added my name to the list of editors, even though I mentioned that I am not worthy of it, yet. She obviously didn't listen and instead was very appreciative of my contributions. Gotta say, she's not that bad after all. I don't know why Niall keeps doubting her, continuously. 

On the other hand, Harry's social demeanor has been weird throughout the afternoon. I can't go around and ask people,because they'll just say that  he's completely fine, but I know he isn't. Something's going on, for sure. Moreover, every time I made an effort to approach him today, he tried to ignore me in every possible way. Therefore, I have decided to ask him straightforwardly, with no hesitations. I feel like if he spits out, he'll feel much better.  

I walk to him while he's packing his stuff. I observe his motions and they are very swift, as if he's in a hurry.I stand next to him,maintaining my distance. I know he is aware of my presence, but he chooses not to look. I break the awkwardness.

'Hey' I say, rather loudly for him to hear. Let's see if he can ignore me this time.

'Hi.' he replies, still not looking. I sigh under my breath.

'You okay?' I ask,moving a strand of hair to the back of my right ear.

'Yeah. Why'd you ask?' he questions me back, acting as if his 'packing' is more important.

'You're really asking me that? After literally ignoring me for the entire day? It's as if I am a ghost or a bare wall.' I exclaim, rather annoyed. He doesn't say anything.

'So now you're gonna act delusional? Harry, come on, it's a serious issue right now. If something's up, just spit it out. We can work it out together-'

'I am fine, OKAY? Nothing's wrong with me. Besides, I am NOT OBLIGED to answer every single one of your questions. Just leave me alone, honestly. It'll be good for both of us.' he cuts me off midway, raising his voice in the middle. I am taken aback by this. I look around to notice if anyone  was eavesdropping. At that moment, my mind was just blank. He never acted like this before. Or did I really annoy him to that extent? 

'I just want you to feel better Harry....' I mutter, almost stuttering as I build the sentence.

'I am okay, Ashley. If I am ignoring you, it's for a good reason. So stop interrogating me as if you have full rights to do that.' he clearly states this time. At that moment, everything seemed meaningless and I had nothing else to say. He made it very clear already.

'Okay, I'm, I am...sorry.' I stutter, as I speak. I turn around and walk away. I don't dare to look back. I text Ruby and ask her to reach here immediately. I just want to leave this place as quickly as possible. 

Ruby reaches in a few minutes and I sigh in relief. I didn't spot Harry leaving, so he still might be there. But whatever, I guess. Ruby gets out of the car and approaches me. I fake a smile to hide my emotions. She engulfs me into a soft hug, before getting in the car. She starts the ignition and drives away.

Throughout the entire car ride, Harry's voice and words kept echoing in my head. His loud, raspy and annoyed voice. I am not sure if he meant to do that. I gulp down the water in my bottle and try to forget about it. Ruby is telling me about how she spent her day and I only nod my head and give expressions. A drop of tear escapes the edges of my eye, as I move my head, from Ruby to the car window, making sure that she doesn't see it.   

Like always, the beauty of this will perish in flames...

 A voice echoes in my head.

'Ash, are you okay?' she finally questions. Of course she was gonna ask me. I wasn't myself in the car.

"Yeah, I am completely fine! What's wrong with me? Besides, today's a fantastic day, since Shawn apparently has a surprise for me and he will most likely reveal it today.' I lie. Ruby smiles at me and tries to instill good vibes and I thank her. We  hug again and I wave her a goodbye, before she drives away. I walk slowly back to house, looking at my phone every now and then. I bump into Shawn, making me almost trip over the first step of the staircase. 

'Shit, be careful sis' Shawn exclaims, after holding me from tripping. I don't say anything,nor do I look at him in the eye. Tears start forming in my eyes, and it feels like I am trying to hold back a surge of water behind a weakly manufactured reservoir. Without any sign, I bury my face on his neck,releasing that surge of water. He wraps his arms around my back.

'It's okay, it's okay, I am here, I am here' he mutters, which revives a pleasant feeling within me. I am a bit surprised that he didn't ask as to why I am sobbing, although I am relieved at the same time. He might think I am being too sensitive. I let go of him and wipe my eyes a bit too roughly. I begin to go upstairs, until I reach my room. For a brief moment, my mind gets surrounded again,by the thoughts I am avoiding to think about. I decide to distract myself, to feel better. 

(please scroll up to play the song now, before continuing)

I open my closet and decide to clean it, since it's been a very long time. I press on shuffle play and 'Back to You' by Louis Tomlinson starts playing.  I connect my iPad to the speakers, to increase the loudness. I head over to my wardrobe and begin to take out of everything. I didn't realize I had a great deal of clothes, until now.

I begin to pull out all of the clothes that I usually wear. I begin folding them and putting them with the extra hangers. A delicate black winter coat  emerges from the pile of my dresses. I pull it out and place myself on the floor. To my surprise, it still smells like his strong, opulent cologne. I run my hands through it and all the memories start flashing back in my head. All the times that we would make phone calls, video calls, hang out, and most importantly, when we would always be there for each other. He lend me his coat to keep me warm, when he, himself, was freezing under that blizzard. The feeling of euphoria and adrenaline rushing through my blood every time I saw or talked to him.

I've never felt like this before. This type of feeling is divergent. 

I put all my clothes back in the closet and stop the music. To be frank, I will never be able to complete this if my mind is wandering somewhere else. I take Harry's coat and lie down on my cozy bed, covering myself with my soft woolen blanket, while hugging that coat. It's still too early to fall asleep, but that's the only sort of distraction I can think of right now....

3 days later, February 1 

'Ash! Get ready! WE DON'T WANNA BE LATE!!' Shawn calls from his room and I look at the brown renaissance style clock hanging on my wall. It's almost 6:30 pm. Even though we haven't met or talked for three days, I still decide that I am gonna attend. I'll pluck up the courage and talk to him, but I am pretty sure he'll be hungover by the end of the night. I texted him a lengthy birthday message this morning, but he hasn't responded. I sigh, every time I don't see the notification I want to. 

I take out my black dress that I've selected for the occasion.

I put my dress on and fit it properly. I sit near my vanity table and decide to go for a smokey look. I don't usually take a long time to do my makeup. I look at my phone every now and then, but as usual, there was nothing. I finish my makeup, style my hair, put on my black high heels and put some cologne. I take out his gift carefully from the nearby shelf, since it's a heavy box. I take my black bag and head downstairs, carefully managing my steps, as I haven't worn heels in a while.

'Woah, that's a huge box you got there...' Mary exclaims as I reach our car. I chuckle softly and she helps me to load it behind. There were plenty of other gifts alongside mine, so I had to position it correctly. Shawn arrives in no-time and asks us to get in immediately. He starts the ignition and drives away.

-

The place is gigantic and according to Shawn, it's one of Harry's luxurious bungalows. It took us quite some time to reach here, since it's a bit far from the city. Two buffed men approach us. One of them takes the key to park our car and one of them unloads all the gifts that we brought, which are taken inside later.

We enter the house and there's already tons of people, some of them who I've seen before. I spot a small bar near the living room balcony. I inform Mary before making my way through all the people. To my surprise, Ruby was sat there as well.

'HEYYY!' she says, holding a glass of wine. I hug her and take a seat close to her. The bartender asks if I want anything and I only ask for a glass of cider. 

'ALLURING ASHLEY!' Ruby screams to me, causing me to face her abruptly. I feel like the effect of alcohol has started to take over.

'HARRY'S GONNA LOVE THIS' she speaks again, pointing at my chest. Speaking of Harry, I look around, but I don't spot him anywhere. Bummer.

'Shut up' I playfully reply, and she chuckles.

'Where's Niall?' I ask.

'Upstairs....with his lads. Especially with the birthday lad' she responses and I nod. 

'Oh yeah! I met Harry's mum, Anne, a while ago! I felt so loved and cared for when we were chatting anddddd....I also told her about you' she says randomly and I raise my eyebrow out of interest. 

'She wants to meet you, Ash! She was intrigued when I was talking about you. I must say, she LOVES meeting people' she tells me more. Wow. I am gonna meet Harry's family members. If not now, then throughout the party, at one moment. Just the idea of it makes me feel ecstatic. 

'OH, oh there she is! Anne! Hey!' Ruby waves at her as she walks to the bar. She looks really alluring from a distance and radiates those positive vibes. She looks like a very happy woman and not to mention, Harry looks a lot like her. Obviously. Like mom, like son. I get up from my seat, to give her a warm  introduction.

'Hey, darling...finally. You look so beautiful' she says in between our hug, which is one of the softest ones I've had in a while. We let go of each other and she starts to introduce herself. She reminds me of my mom a lot. Her lovely and charismatic attitude can blow away anybody. Wow. It's so certain that she really passed on her wonderful genes. After a few minutes of talking, a brunette girl joins our conversation, holding a glass of whiskey. She's wearing a denim jumpsuit and her demeanor is so much like his: kind, charismatic, demure. I immediately realized who this woman is.

'"Heyyy....I am Gemma, Gemma Styles, nice to meet you!' she shakes my hand and hugs me as well. They are so welcoming, that you sometimes feel like you're one of them, or a part of the family.

'I've heard so much about you, and I always wanted to have a warm and comfortable rendezvous. So I am glad we're finally having one...' she continues and I can't help but pull out my smile. I take my glass and the three of us drink together. I turn around to call ruby but she wasn't there. I hope wherever she is, she's under control since she looked slightly drunk.

Gemma, Anne and I continue with our conversation and by now, I know a lot of cute things about the family. However, Gemma turns to face the flight of stairs, and so do I. I instantly get taken aback by the sight. It was Harry coming down with a suit and holding hands with....wait a second. No. This can't be happening. Is that why he literally ignored me for three days? Niall, Louis and Liam follows them, and to my surprise, they look so ecstatic, especially Harry.

Is this a joke? Is he trying to play with me? 

I keep on battling with my thoughts, praying that it's just a prank or something else. Lightning struck to my thoughts when I overhear Gemma and Anne's conversation.

'Wow, I had no idea that my son got back with Emily.' Anne tells Gemma.

'I guess they always loved each other. Besides, they worked together for a music video and they must have reconciled during the process. Yup, that's definitely what I think, mum' Gemma expresses her opinion to Anne and she nods her head.

'As long as my son is on cloud nine, I am happy. They don't look that bad, after all' Anne exclaims. My heart keeps sinking and sinking, with every word she says. Things get worse for my emotions when I see Emily placing a kiss on his cheek. They hold each other more closely, and that just makes it even more disturbing for me to witness. I look away and charge towards the bar, leaving Gemma and Anne behind. I sit on the stool and wipe away the tears which were gathering in my eyes. I look around to see if Shawn was anywhere around, and to my relief, he wasn't. He warned me to not drink a lot, but I can't think of anything else. I don't care if I'm hungover. I just need something to alleviate this pain. 

I can't believe he did that...

I feel tingly after 5 shots, so I stop for a brief moment. The bartender kept asking if I was sure of doing this. My face kinda shows that I don't drink, but I can't help it right now. Every time I feel like my life is augmenting, a trace of bad luck just has to creep in. I feel angry, sad, lonely, betrayed, depressed, instead of feeling happy that Emily and Harry are back together. 

I tell the bartender to bring 2 more shots and he immediately brings them. As I am about to gulp it down my throat, somebody takes the glass away from me: Harry. He analyzes my face and gets upset. I get up from my stool and decide to confront him.

'You don't have to care about me. So I suggest that you go away' I tell him,but my words don't affect him, at all. 

'Let me explain, Ash. I'll break it down to you-'

'YOU DON'T HAVE TO!! Actions speak LOUDER than words, remember??? So you have proved yourself You're just another person to walk away and make my life more miserable.' I cut him off. He shakes his head, eyes closed. I can't help but tear up, no matter how hard I try to hold it back.

'You could've just told me Harry. I called you, sent you multiple messages but you just didn't care enough to even open them.' I continue and this time, he really does look sad. He's probably pretending, to show me that he's a nice "best friend". 

Emily comes out of nowhere and joins us. She holds Harry around his bicep, and they both look at each other. Emily turns to face me, again.

'Ash! I am so glad you're here! But, we'll talk later because I need a word with Harry.Do you mind?' she asks politely, and I shake my head as a gesture that it's okay. Harry smiles at her and they both leave. I go back to the counter and finish taking my shots. I feel like I'll suffocate if I stay here any longer. I take my purse, and gallop among people, towards the main door.