There was only one other person who knew about Louis' feelings apart from himself.

One girl that understood and helped Louis through every last detail.

What the caramel haired boy had to say wasn't shocking news by any means. From the very beginning she noticed the boy's infatuation.

Starting from the X-Factor days that ignited a new but exhilarating feeling inside of Louis and leading all the way up to a few months ago when she called after seeing Harry and Louis' face plastered all over Los Angeles.

It didn't take a genius to recognize the literal heart eyes Louis had for the "Bambi looking one", she quite often called him.

But maybe that was just sibling telepathy.

At any rate, there Louis was again, pacing back and forth on the rooftop with his phone glued to his ear.

"Lottie we need to talk."

"I'm all ears big brother," a sweet voice promised through the speaker.

"The stunt is killing me. I can't do it," Louis grit his teeth together with a heavy breath.

"Oh Louis what's going on?" Lottie worried.

"It hurts too much."

"What's hurting?"

"All this pretending," Louis lied quickly, forgoing his plans to tell his sister the truth. He feared she might think bad of him for somehow still being this scared.

But Lottie was much too smart for Louis' excuses. Even back then she was quicker than her brother.

"You're lying to me Lou."

"Is it that obvious?"

"You still have feelings for him."

"I know."

"Do you remember that night in Pittsburgh? When you called me after the show," Lottie started.

"Vaguely," Louis sighed, remembering how he had broke down that night.

"Well you rang me the moment the concert ended and you were sobbing. Lou I could barely understand what you were saying. But I can still remember what you told me, so so clearly," she continued.

"Lottie you don't have to..."

"You said 'Lottie you're the only one that knows and I don't know who else to tell this to' and then you cried to me and you said 'I love him Lottie, I love him.'"

Louis stayed silent, holding back the same tears that threatened to spill out of his pained blue eyes even now.

"You love him Louis, it's okay," she said over the phone tenderly. No amount of time passed or feelings hidden could make his sister ever think less of him.

Louis was himself and although he was fearful his heart had never loved deeper. This Lottie knew.

"I thought pushing all of this back was what was best for me, and Harry, and the band. I was just doing what I thought was right, but now everything is so..utterly...twisted," the exhausted boy stuttered as he looked out at the sunrise over the city.

Even the melting, pastel colors in the sky couldn't bring him comfort now. The soft hues only reminded him of Harry. How gentle he was and how much he'd adore that particular July sunrise.

"I always had a feeling you and Harry would find your way back to each other but I never predicted it would be like this."

"Lottie," Louis paused.

"Louis," she echoed her brother.

"I want him," Louis' admitted softly, his voice cracking from the weight he felt pressing atop his chest.

"He loves you. I can see it in his eyes Lou. Just find it in yourself to tell him," his sister's voice hummed over the receiver.

"Lottie you can't just see things in people's eyes! That's fairytale nonsense Daisy and Phoebe conjure up. Harry doesn't feel for me like that," Louis squeezed the bridge of his nose, regaining his composure.

"You don't believe that I 'see it in his eyes' ? Okay, that's fine. How about this Louis? I can see it in his heart and in his body language. I can hear it in his voice. Lou I can even tell he loves you by the way he performs on stage. Every part of Harry glows when you're around. He loves you," Lottie yelled without a moment of hesitation or uncertainty in her voice.

If she were being honest there was nothing she believed in more. Harry's love for her brother was as real as any love she'd ever known.

Louis stood speechless, attempting to picture those exact moments. Maybe his sister was right, maybe Louis had failed to see the most obvious signs in the world.

"So I should tell him," he hesitated after a stretch of silence.

"You have to if you ever want anything to change."

~

Louis woke up for the second time on a sunny Saturday morning. He opted on snuggling back into his blankets after his phone call with Lottie.

If he just stayed in bed forever he'd never have to face Harry.

But of course the boy knew his sister was right. The only option left was telling Harry how he felt. It was just a matter of how and when.

Ever since their date at the bar, both boys seemed to be walking on eggshells again.

It was in their drunken memories that both seemed to recall affection shown much more passionate for each other than before.

And if Liam and Niall noticed a lack of publicity shots from that very night, they didn't say a word.

The light bouncing in from underneath the bedroom door prompted the oldest to get up and start his day. No use delaying the inevitable.

"TOMMO COME HERE," an Irish voice screeched the moment Louis opened his door.

Louis smiled at his hands. What would he do without his boys ?

"I'm coming I'm coming," Louis laughed until he was leaning against the sofa, looking down at Niall.

"Come watch the footie game with us you've already missed half," Niall smiled up at the oldest.

"That's the big urgency?" Louis laughed yet quickly began studying the scores on the television.

"Next concert's not till tomorrow; there's nothing else to do," the blonde boy shrugged his shoulders as Liam patted the seat next to him for Louis to sit down.

"Where's Harry?" Louis asked Liam after looking around the room thoroughly.

"He's in his room; don't bother him today mate," Liam quickly answered, keeping his voice down.

"What why not, is he sleeping still? Can't I just wake him up?" Louis crossed his arms, not understanding.

"No!" both Niall and Liam whisper shouted together. "Stay here with us," they started again.

"What's going on?" Louis sat down, confusion resolving into worry.

"Do you remember everything we talked about that night when Simon sent you and H to the hotel alone?" Liam began.

"You might have to refresh my memory," Louis admitted.

"About the inhaler and Harry's anxiety and panic attacks," Liam lowered his voice even further, keeping an eye on Harry's bedroom door.

"Of course I remember that," Louis' voice softened.

"So sometimes he has days where everything just gets too much, you know? He can't control it at all. But every now and again he'll have a day like today where he needs to be alone and to rest because his anxiety is just too strong," Liam explained with a frown.

Sometimes Liam wondered how Harry got stuck with a mental health disorder. The sweetest, kindest human being Liam had ever met surely couldn't deserve such a fate.

If it were up to him he'd switch places with Harry and take away everything that hurt him. Maybe that was just the effect Harry had on everyone since he was the youngest of the lot. Everyone wanted to protect him.

Louis looked at Liam with inconsolable eyes. So that's what was happening every time Harry disappeared for a while, he thought.

The blue eyed boy felt sick realizing how clueless he had been. How betrayed Harry must feel.

If Louis was supposed to be his best friend, how could he have missed so much? He had never known the extent of the delicate boy's disorder, not even close.

"Do you think he'd talk at all to me if I tried ?" Louis asked softly.

"You can try but don't open his door and don't push him to let you in. He always says no to me and Liam anyways," Niall sighed.

"I just need to try," Louis stood up, making his way back to the bedroom doors.

The caramel haired boy pressed an ear up to the wooden door.

Absolute silence.

Louis knocked on the door ever so lightly, trying his best to be considerate.

"Harry are you okay in there? Do you need anything?"

At first Louis was met with the same silence he had heard before, but as though the youngest was deciding if he should answer or not, a quiet voice replied.

"Can you come in?" Harry asked meekly.

Louis breathed a sigh of relief.

He opened the door slowly and closed it again once he was inside the dark bedroom. It took a moment for Louis' eyes to adjust to the dark before he saw Harry.

The green eyed boy was cuddled in his lilac quilt, hugging a large white teddy bear.

It was unmistakably the teddy bear he won for Harry at the carnival all those years ago. Louis couldn't believe he kept it.

"Hi," Harry whispered as green met blue from across the room.

"Hi Hazza," Louis smiled faintly.

"Would you stay with me?" the youngest closed his eyes again, taking a deep breath.

"How could I ever say no?" Louis walked over to the bed, sitting down amongst the pillows.

Harry adjusted, laying his head on top of Louis' lap .

The 23 year old soothingly ran his fingers through Harry's rich chocolate curls, pausing to massage his temples.

"Louis?" A small voice asked.

"Yes?" Louis looked fondly down at the half-sleeping beauty.

"Thank you."

Louis shook his head. He wished there was someway to tell Harry that he didn't have to thank him.

Louis wanted to thank Harry for letting him in, for trusting him enough to rely on him again.

The curly haired boy had spent far too long dealing with life alone. Louis was just happy that those days were over.

Harry cuddled closer into Louis, feeling his warmth, listening to his soft breaths. Having the blue eyed boy with him was a comfort he's never been able to put into words.

But suddenly, like a missing piece of a puzzle Harry knew the next line of lyrics to the unnamed song he sang to Louis in the music room weeks before:

'And pain gets hard but now you're here and I can't feel a thing'.

It was a comfortable numbness. An empty feeling where the ache used to be. No Louis could never heal him of the pressure he felt inside his rib cage, but he could lessen it.

And for that Harry loved the boy even more.

Louis dragged his finger tips along the back of Harry's neck, feeling his soft skin, so warm to the touch.

He could almost hear his sister's words in the back of his head telling him if he ever wanted change he'd have to tell Harry everything.

And in that moment, Louis truly knew that he'd never have feelings for anyone one else the way he had for the sleeping angel on his lap.

Because Louis wasn't just in love with Harry, he was in love with his quirks, his passions, and even his struggles, as immense as they were.

He was hopelessly in love.
Deeply, unconditionally, and all over again.

It was time to tell Harry the truth.