"Owen washed my hair." Cristina looks to Meredith and Solace as they sit on the bench in the locker room before rounds, "And then he told me to eat this grainy nut bar. And he booked me into surgery this morning. He is in charge of me. I'm a bride, and I'm going with it."

"But trauma guy didn't clear you." Meredith smiles.

"Yeah, but he said he'll figure that out." Cristina shrugs.

"Yes!" Lexi turns around, addressing the other people in the locker room, "I am the crazy one that freaks out and screams at people. Like— like that."

Meredith turns to look at the spectators too, "Go gawk at each other for awhile." Turning to Lexi after, "Are you okay?"

"Would everybody please just stop asking me if I am okay? Okay?" Leaving the room.

Cristina turns back to Meredith and Solace, "He clear you yet?"

Meredith makes a face.

"No? Still?"

"I resorted to tears. I wore bad mascara so he wouldn't miss them." Meredith tells them.

"What—what did Derek say?" Cristina takes a bit of her nut bar.

"Oh, I will be avoiding him today." Meredith shakes her head.

Solace snorts, "Because you left him in the pokey."

"Yeah." Meredith scrunches her nose. Both girls turn to Solace, Meredith asking, "Have you been cleared yet?"

Solace shakes her head, "Nope." Grabbing her coat as she stands, "Which is why I will be in the clinic if you need me." Walking out of the room with a wave over her shoulder.

"I'm worried about her." Meredith says, "Has she talked to you at all?"

Cristina shakes her head, "I thought she was talking to you."

Both girls stare at each other for a minute before turning back to the door Solace had walked out of.

"Crap."

***

Solace sits across from Meredith in the patient lounge, eating her lunch while watching the wheel of fortune on the tv in the corner. Cristina comes over, sitting down next to Meredith, looking up to the tv before over to her friend, "Really?"

"This is what I'm cleared to do." Meredith slouches down, "I'm cleared to solve this puzzle."

Solace speaks up, "No, don't buy a vowel, you idiot."

"Scarlet Pimpernel." Cristina solves the puzzel.

Meredith looks over at her, "How did you— there was one 'c' and an 'm'."

Solace just sighs, "Well there goes my lunch time entertainment."

"Have you talked to Derek yet about the—" Cristina asks.

"Today's not the day." Meredith takes a sip from her coffee.

"Right. He just got out of the joint." Cristina agrees.

Solace nods, "Let him ease back into society."

Jackson and Alex come over joining them. Jackson sitting next to Solace while Alex stands by Cristina's chair.

"You ready?" Jackson ask's Cristina, "You up for this?"

"Up for what?" Solace looks between them, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"Teddy's rebuilding a woman's atrium out of a sack of cow meat." Cristina answers her.

"You're not nervous at all?" Jackson checks, stealing some of Solace's chips.

Alex sighs, "You're lucky. I get to watch an intestinal perf repair. Bailey wont let me operate till I get this bullet out."

Meredith raises her hand, "I'll take it out. I'll cut it out right now."

"You sound like a junkie." Alex tells her.

Solace snorts, "A junky and a Felon. Fitting." Earning a glare from the blonde girl.

"What the hell is a Pimpernel?" Alex gestures to the tv before walking away. Lexi soon takes his place, crossing her arms as she sighs, "I'm never going to get to operate again. Everyone thinks I'm gonna carve my initials into a patient."

"I'll never operate again because one man thinks I'm crazy." Meredith says.

"Hey, guys." Jackson get's their attention, gesturing to the tv, "Look at this."

They watch as the breaking news clip shows what happened to the flag football team in the ER. Everybody wincing back as it plays.

"Ohh."

"Oh my god."

"Wow."

"Oh, my god. She never saw it coming." Lexi says, "No. No, no, no." She runs away, leaving the three residents to look after her.

Solace turns to Meredith,"Fifty says she's back in the cuckoo's nest by lunch."

Jackson nudges her with his elbow, "Be nice." While Cristina laughs at her joke.

***

Solace looks down, seeing she's being paged to the OR. She ignores it, continuing to look over paper work at the nurses desk. When her pager goes off again she rolls her eyes.

A few seconds later the phone at the nurses desk rings, Nurse Tyler answering it, "Hello. Yes she's— I'll send her." He hangs up, turing to Solace, "You need to get to OR 1."

"I'm not cleared for surgery." Solace says, continuing to look at the paper work.

Nurse Tyler grabs the file from her hand,

"Hey—"

"It's not surgery, it's Dr.Yang. Go."

Solace's eyes go wide for a moment before she gets up, running to the OR. When she rushes in through the door, she see's Cristina and Meredith on the floor. Solace's breathing starts picking up, becoming a little erratic as she walks towards them. She can hear the blood pumping through her veins, making everything else seem like it's underwater.

Solace takes some deep breaths, kneeling down next to Cristina's head, "Cristina. Cristina get up." Solace whispers.

"I can't." Cristina's voice shakes.

"It's okay." Meredith tells her.

Solace shakes her head, her breathing getting worse, "Cristina, I need you to get up."

"I cant— I can't move."

Meredith tries to calm Cristina down while glancing at Solace, seeing the girl start to panic as well, "I know. I know."

"Cristina, please." Solace whimpers, some tears falling down her face, "Please get up. I need you to get up, okay? Because I can't be in here anymore. So please. Please get up." Solace starts to shake.

The surgeons in the room look over to the three girls, two of them panicking while Meredith looks between both her friends, not knowing who to try and console now. They had never seen Cristina and Solace like this, and in complete honesty, it was terrifying watching them break down now.

Meredith takes of Cristina's gloves, grabbing her hand, "You feel that?"

"Yeah." Cristina nods.

Solace raises her voice a bit, "Cristina. Get. Up. I can't— I can't be in here. I can't breath— I need you, Okay? I'm here because you need me and now, I need you. So please, get up so I-I can walk out of here."

Cristina looks over at Solace as Meredith slowly helps her off the ground, Solace following them up. She moves to the door first as Meredith and Cristina walk behind her. She holds it open for them, walking down the opposite way of the hallway when they all exit the OR. Solace goes down to the basement, curling up on one of the beds against the wall and crying.

Hours pass as she sits there, staring at the wall and trying to keep her breathing calm, when she feels weight on the bed next to her. She looks over, seeing Jackson staring at her with concern.

"Let me help you." He whisper to her, opening up his arms, "Stop holding it in. Let me help you."

She looks at him, taking a few deep breaths, before everything hits her again. She curls into his chest as his arms wrap around her. She holds onto his shirt as she cries.

"All I see, all I see is them dead." Solace voice is shaky and weak as she speaks, "Meredith, Cristina, Derek, Alex, You." She whispers, "All I see when I close my eyes is you lying on the ground of the OR with a bullet in your head and I don't know how to— I can't breath in here. I can't function in this hospital." She shakes her head, pulling back to look at Jackson's face, "Not when all I see around me is the people I care about dead."

Jackson nods, rubbing soothing circles onto the girls arms, "Okay. Okay." He tries to find something to say. He's never seen the girl so broken, so scared. He hasn't heard her genuinely laugh since the shooting. All he's seen is the tired girl that's keeping everything in. He doesn't think he's ever seen her as broken as she looks now, and he doesn't know how to fix it.

Jackson Pulls her close again, breathing deeply, "It's okay. We're alright." He whispers to her.

But truthfully, he doesn't know if either of them will be the same again.