Aight let's go. Recommended by: SparklyMagix

Pretending Unlocked doesn't exist

Keefe: Oh hey Peggy are we gonna-

Peggy: *taps mic onstage* Hold on for one second, Keefe

Keefe: Oh, uh okay

Peggy: *clears throat* 

Epic Dawn by Bobby Cole begins playing from nowhere

Keefe: What

Peggy: THIS CHAPTER I've written it so that Keeper of the Lost Cities characters sing Broadway songs without asking questions! This is: Kotlc the Musical! Also, according to Wattpad statistics, only a small percentage of people who read this book are actually following me, so if you enjoy the chapter, please consider following. It's free, and you can always unfollow.

The music stops

Peggy: *sits down in the front row again*

Keefe: What just happened

Peggy: Nothing

Keefe: No. Something happened. What the heck just-

Dex: Dude, seriously. I've learned to just stop asking questions.

***Take 1***

Biana: Oh, morning Dex!

Dex: Hi Biana

Biana: How's life?

Dex: *shrugs* Disappointing

Biana: What's the matter?

Dex: The triplets are just ticking me off.

Biana: Oh, I'm sorry

Dex: Me too! I mean, look at me! I'm almost out of Foxfire and I always thought- oh...

Biana: What?

Dex: No it sounds stupid

Biana: Aw, come on!

Dex: When I was little, I thought I would be...

Biana: What?

Dex: The best alchemist in the lost cities!  (Line provided by not-planned. Thank you!)

Biana: *laughs* Oh

Dex: But now I'm almost sixteen and as you can see, I'm not

Biana: Nope

Dex: *shrugs* Oh well

Biana: *hums in agreement*

Dex: It sucks to be me

Biana: Nooo

Dex: It sucks to be me

Biana: No!

Dex: It sucks to have bad match parents, triplet siblings, can't you see? It sucks to be me.

Biana: You think your life sucks?

Dex: I think so!

Biana: Your problems aren't so bad! I'm kind of pretty. And pretty dang smart.

Dex: You are!

Biana: Thanks! I like romantic things like music and art. And as you know I have a gigantic heart! So whyyyyyyyy don't I have a boyfriend? F***! It sucks to be me!

Peggy: Language!

 Biana: It's in the script though

Peggy: L A N G U A G E

***Take 2***

Biana: It sucks to be me!

Dex: Me too!

Biana: It sucks to be me

Dex: It sucks to be me! It sucks to be Dex

Biana: And Biana!

Dex: To be left behind

Biana: To not have a date!

Dex/Biana: It sucks to be me

*Tam and Keefe enter, their dialogue overlapping*

Keefe: Oh, I dunno, eleven o'clock? Midnight? I'll come home when I want to!

Tam: No, Keefe we've talked about this before. No, Keefe, I'm not-I know that you can make-I know-

Keefe: You're not my mother, Tam!

Tam: I'm not trying to be your mother!

Keefe: *laughs*

Dex: Hey! Tam, Keefe. Can you settle something for us, do you have a second?

Keefe: *nods*

Tam: Um, certainly.

Biana: Who's life sucks more? Dex's or mine?

Tam: Tch.

Tam/Keefe: OURS!

Tam: We live together

Keefe: We're close as people can get

Tam: *sarcastically* We've been the best of buddies

Keefe: Ever since the day we met!

Tam: So he knows lots of ways to make me really upset!

Keefe: Wha-

Tam: Everyday is an aggravation!

Keefe: Come on, that's an exaggeration!

Tam: You leave your clothes out

Keefe: Wha- I- I-

Tam: You put your feet on my chair

Keefe: Oh yeah? You do such stupid things like ironing your underwear!

Dex/Biana: *giggle*

Tam: You make that very small apartment we share! A Hell!

Keefe: So do you! That's why I'm in Hell too!

Tam: It sucks to be me!

Keefe: No, it sucks to be me!

Biana: It sucks to be me!

Dex: It sucks to be me!

Dex/Biana/Keefe/Tam: Is there anybody here it doesn't suck to be?! It sucks to be me.

Biana: Da dat da dat da~

Keefe: Da dat da dat da!

Dex: Da dat da dat da!

Tam: Da dat da da

Biana: Da dat da dat da~

Keefe: Da dat da dat da!

Dex: Da dat da dat da!

Tam: Da dat da da

Sophie: Why are you all so happy?

Keefe: Because our lives suck!

Sophie: Your lives suck? Am I hearing you correctly? HA! I come into these cities, for opportunities. Tried to be a normal student, but I'm an experiment! But with hard work I have made all these friends! With powers! And now I lead Team Valiant! But people don't trust me! And the Neverseen is trying to kill me! And every One! Has! Plans! For! Me! It sucks to be me. It sucks to be me. I say it sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks SUCKS! It sucks to be me.

Peggy: We're cutting it there!

Fitz: Wait I don't even have a part?

Peggy: No, your life is kinda perfect so...

Fitz: Alvar-

Peggy: *shrugs* Kill him then if he's such a problem. Goodnight everybody!

Yes I'm cringy but I don't care

The finale ever approaches