Katherina: hello! I have gathered you all here to-

Harry: mom...dad?! *runs to lily and James and hugs them while crying*

Draco: why are we even here?! And who are you?!

Katherina: I was getting there! Just shut up and listen! My name is Katherina and you all are-

Ron: your name is what?

Katherina: *holds the bridge of her nose in a annoyance* just call me Kat.

Hermione: aren't half of us supposed to be dead?

Severus: can I go back to being dead?

Sirius: I'd rather be dead then look at...that. *points at  Severus*

Kat: * grabs Sirius but the collar of his shirt* apologize. Now!

Sirius: sorry!

Kat: apologizes to Severus, not me.

Sirius: *looks at Severus*.........s...sorry..

Kat: *lets go of Sirius* as I was saying-

Voldemort: LET ME OUT OF THIS ROOM! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO KEEP ME HELD HOSTAGE LIKE THIS!!!

Harry: for the first time ever...I agree with Voldemort.

Lucius: perhaps you'd come to the dark side then?

Ron: he'd never join you!

*everyone starts arguing with each other all at the same time*

Kat: SHUT IT!!

*everyone goes quiet at stares at Kat*

Kat: as I was saying, I have gathered you all here today to react to...drum roll please.

Fred and Gorge: *do a drumroll*

Kat: Ships!

Severus: why react to large boats?

Luna: yeah, that sounds awfully boring. Couldn't we react to something else?

Kat: *facepalms* the kind of ship I am speaking of is a romantic pairing.

Severus: ok where's the vodka?!

Kat: *snaps*

Severus: *vodka appears in front of him and he starts chugging it*