𝖳𝗐𝗈

May 21st

𝓐𝓾𝓻𝓸𝓻𝓪

"If it's not you, then I'm single."

The words replayed in my mind as I scrolled finding out everything. Finding out the man I gave endless chances to, finding out someone who called me the love of their life, finding out someone who I spent half a decade of my life with could so easily replace me and betray me.

There she was.

Petite, young, and so unlike me. She perched herself onto his lap. I immediately notice the word 'blessed' blasted on the side of his neck as he tried to hide his face. The way of nausea hit me like a truck. He promised he wouldn't do this to me again; he promised last year was the final time.

The dream slowly faded. I buried my face deeper into the fluffiness of the pillow underneath my head. I felt the dampness against my cheek knowing the dream made me cry in my sleep again. I was just grateful I managed to sleep through the night unlike the last 2 weeks where I toss and turn waking up 3-5 times during the night.

Reality started to slowly creep in. The silky heaven of the sheets didn't resemble the cotton ones I had at home, and the slight lavender scent of the pillow mist didn't greet my nose instead it was replaced by the musky scent of a man's cologne.

I tried to crack my eyes open slightly only to get greeted with a pounding headache. Looks like the 10 cocktails I had at Joe's last night didn't agree with my otherwise Sober Susan lifestyle.

After the 3rd attempt, my eyes adjusted to the bright room that wasn't close to mine in Mississauga. The dark burgundy walls weren't the pink ones I had at home, the black silk sheets weren't the cotton dark purple ones. I slowly took in my surroundings. The gaming desk off to the corner facing the large floor-to-ceiling windows, the flat screen mounted to the wall in front of the bed, the framed art of dead 90s rappers covering the walls, even the king-size bed I passed out in that was a heaven of silk and comfort.

"Great fucking going Rory." I groan loudly sitting up and noticing my body is drowning in a black and white graphic tee, not the romper I left the house in yesterday.

My otherwise wild hair is tamed by laying in a messy bun on top of my head. Whoever or wherever I was the man took enough care of me to make sure I was comfortable.

I slowly lurked myself from out of the warmth of the sheets and duvet to hunt down my clothes and purse. My phone must be dead which will send my mom on a spiral along with my best friends.

I crept out of the bedroom and down the hall. This was a man's apartment with rich colours, and the strong smell of cologne and laundry detergent. I follow the sound of the news along with the slow beats of R&B playing from the living room. The breeze from the air conditioning left a slight shiver down my spine.

I try to rack my brain for any memories from last night. All I can remember is the strong hands and the gentle words of someone. I waited for the waves of anxiety to meet me, but instead, I felt comfort and safety. I knew this wasn't Elijah he's made it clear over the last few weeks since I found out I'm no less than a piece of dog shit under his shoe.

Once I made it into the living room I spotted the open kitchen concept, the dark cherry cabinets, marble counter tops, stainless steel appliances, the black leather couches, the workout equipment tucked away to make room for a bar table, and a bean bag chair I know for a fact Elijah had nothing to do with this.

I spot movement from the corner of my eye on the balcony. I ignore the fact my purse and clothes sit nicely folded on the couch inching closer to what I just saw. The sliding door was left open I spotted the massive beige pitbull first he propped his lazy head up from where he was sun tanning on the pavement. He didn't make any sudden movement to attack.

"You call me a creeper, but yet who's doing the creeping now Rory?" The deep husky voice made my bones rattle in the purest delicious way possible.

No one, not even Eli had that effect on me. Fuck me sideways.

I poked my head out seeing no one else besides Keannon Ledger. My heart immediately stopped beating as I took in his dirty blonde hair that was pulled up into a low man bun, his scruffy yet tamed facial hair, his lean tall frame that lounged on the patio chair, his piercing blue eyes, his long sculpted nose, full lips, his soft but yet strong jawline. He was breathtaking.

"I don't bite, Ro." He jokes as he finishes rolling the tightly bound spiff. Even the way he rolled his weed screamed utter perfection.

I crept onto the balcony which earned the acknowledgment of his dog. Immediately the massive tank got up to sit beside me nudging my leg with his cold nose. I suddenly became all too aware I was standing before this man with just a T-shirt on.

"Did you undress me last night?" I blurted out the demand immediately regretting not softening my tone since I know the stories about this man.

"That skimpy little number you had on didn't look comfortable to sleep in besides you were so drunk you were undressing yourself." He explains lighting the end of the joint inhaling.

"Well I kind of get a bit slutty on straight liquor," I grumbled slightly looking out to the Toronto skyline. I can see the CN tower clearly from his building which means I wasn't far from Union Station.

Keannon chuckled at my joke. The sound rich and deep made my stomach do somersaults. I mentally cursed myself for finding him so damn attractive.

"I'm surprised you're not asking if we fucked." The sound of the curse coming from his lips made me unconsciously squeeze my thighs shut.

I know my sudden reaction to him was obvious by the devious smirk on his lips. "Well.." I pause. "Did we?" I asked softly.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" He barked out laughing which made me finally look at him shooting daggers his way.

"There's my girl." He groaned softly leaning back in his chair. "Get comfortable, Rory. Stop acting all scared of me."

I wanted to note the horror stories I'd heard regarding him, but I kept my lips sealed and sat in the chair closest to the patio door. An easy escape I mentally explained to myself.

His dog followed me like my little shadow nestling his large head on my knee. I gently stroke the top of his head my body slightly relaxing reminding me of my Doberman back home.

"I slept on the couch." He corrected his joke before studying me as he inhaled his joint. "You and Finn took up the entire bed anyway." He says as he exhales.

"So what made you kidnap me?" Again I put my foot in my mouth with the way I blurted out everything that popped into my head.

Keannon shook his head while utter amusement lingered on his stunning face. "I heard about Eli." He remarks. The knife burrowed deeper into my gut. "I figured you wanted a break. Somewhere that maybe you weren't Eli's ex-fiance, but you were simply Rory."

I tried to mask the way he completely caught me off guard by repeating the same words I'd been saying for weeks now back at me. I wanted so desperately to be my person again. I felt the sadness I'd been trying to drown gripping onto me tightly.

"Do they know I'm here?" I asked him not explaining the they I spoke of.

Keannon shook his head. "No one knows you're here. Also, you need to be careful on who you trust, Ro."

I exhale a shaky breath. The last thing I needed was Eli running amuck claiming I'm trying to homewreck Des's family.

"Can I trust you?" The question even caught me off guard. I haven't trusted a soul since Eli. I've been adrift for weeks lost without my best friend and my favourite place to exist.

I try to swallow the lump forming in the back of my throat. "You have no reason to be scared of me, Ro. You haven't been told the full story on anything. You've been fed twisted half-truths." His words smack me straight in the face and for the first time since I feel like last night, I truly look at him already finding his eyes solely on me.

I lick my dry lips. "So tell me," I say quietly.

I watch him shuffle grabbing his cigarette pack he offers me one and I take it. "Thank you," I mutter softly. I could feel his eyes burning at my left hand where the ungodly yellow gold engagement ring once sat.

"He asked for it back," I whispered not knowing why I'm reopening old wounds by explaining it. The daisy pandora ring that now sat in its place felt like it weighed a million pounds. "He gave it to her. He said she is the wife he wants not me."

Keannon shook his head butting the joint before he took his cigarette lighting it which he in return handed me the lighter. "Dumbass doesn't know how to treat women." He noted.

I shake my head slowly in return. "No," I say trying to regain control of my emotions. "He never did."

"I'm not friendly with him, Ro. I hardly even know the kid. I know what he claims, but it's all bullshit. I also heard about what he did last year to you and how he silenced you from speaking out and having anyone in your corner." He explained the sound of genuine concern and anger for me warmed some deeply rooted hatred I didn't realize I had.

No one cared about what he did. No one cares that he ruined our home, or that he destroyed me as a person. I'm supposed to 'heal' and move on when all I want is to rip him apart and demand to know why after all these years, and after me taking care of him at his lowest he'll do this while I'm at my lowest.

The words escape me. I haven't spoken out loud in weeks. I haven't dared allow my guard down since he shattered my heart. So I don't voice it; I let out tiny half-truths instead.

"Last year Jayden was getting arrested because he beat the crap out of Brittney. I was sitting at home waiting for him to come back. He completely went ghost I messaged his dad, Jayden, Brittney, Brendan and even him. I get a message Monday night in lamest terms 'no man will ever want a shordy like me. I am a lardo, I stink, I need to hit the gym." I pause feeling as the tears well up in my eyes. I squeeze them shut trying to will away the pain. "I sent his Xbox flying off the balcony. I lashed out in my anger for weeks. He showed up days later unknown to me with the 16-year-old he was cheating on me with he wanted a few of his clothes telling me we only took a break. I begged him not to block me; begged him not to leave me completely in the dark. But he did and he triggered me to have extreme PTSD." I quickly wiped away the tears that managed to fall.

I didn't notice that Keannon reached his hand over gently stroking my knee with his thumb in small circles. It was a small touch that I didn't realize my crumbling soul needed.

"I can't make promises that it'll get better, baby." He says softly to soothe my pain. The nickname baby was one Eli called me, but hearing it from Keannon it bought me peace I didn't know could exist. "You didn't have a child with him. Eventually you'll heal, and you'll let go even if it feels like you can't do that right now. Puppy love is wild and can feel like it's destroying you, but when you fall deeply earth shattering in love you'll know."

"Is it bad that I wish I met you when this first happened?" The truth came out I didn't even try to hide it.

A sly smile pulled on his lips. "You're probably wondering why I like this white boy and why he's making me question everything." He gently squeezed my knee.

I couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes. "I can't stand you." I laugh almost forgetting I was breaking the fuck apart moments earlier.

"Stay as long as you want, Rory."