When my eyes flutter awake this time, I'm happy there's no furious arguing and that I was actually able to get my eyes open with having to think about it too hard.

Although that doesn't mean sitting up is easy, oh no. The immediate pain from my stomach instantly reminds me of that one. Not only is it empty, extremely empty, but the muscles and sore ribs don't appreciate the movement too much either.

Groaning lightly, I wallow in being awake. I feel weird. Like, off weird. I understand the lack of energy, but that feels not right either. I know that it's completely understandable to be hungry, but it's been so long since I've felt hungry like this. Drained, fighting on nothing for weeks, a husk filled only with pain. Last time I recall being like this was portal adventure.

My eyes flicker around the room, the tiny little organs heavier than iron until they catch sight of the couple of potatoes beside me. Suddenly, the stiff muscles in my arm that I know don't want to be move, snap to life. My stomach caving in and folding over itself at the thought of food, glorious food.

I grab a potato, shoving the whole thing in my mouth when I notice the water bottle and note beside it. Probably should read that, probably really important.

My mouth quickly swallows the potato, and I snatch the other as I grab hold of the note. Teeth tearing apart the steamed vegetable as my eyes skim over the note.

If you wake up alone, please don't eat too fast. The snitches in your shoulder are going to be every unpleasant if you barf. Just try and rest this time around, okay?

I swallow slowly, not because of the note, but because this is not what I wanted to read. Something about how the town's doing or if the refugees are getting the help they need. If the demons have left us alone or if we have communication with Champion City. It would also be nice to know how much resources we have until we have to leave our walls. I didn't go through all this misery just for it to fall apart, I have to make sure everything's okay.

Grunting, I try to force myself up. Wounds screeching at me, my shoulder straining and muscles cramping up inside me. It hurts! It really really does! But still, despite barely having any wisps of strength inside me, I get myself up. Scorning myself as I'm huffing just from that simple movement, eating another potato as my reward.

Distantly, I reach out for the flames. I'm not exactly cold yet, and I can use them a bit and just recover in the Nether soon. Lukas will probably say-

I blink, not feeling a flicker of fire inside me. Wait, what? It should be there, I'm not cold and I need it to get up right now! How can I make sure everything is alright if I don't even have the energy to sit up well!

My heart staggers, fuzzy memories from last time I woke up drifting through my head. Only mere wisps of energy, my friends staring at me and Lukas was devastated because my eyes are... some color, gray I think, and there's a huge scar on my chest underneath the remaining bandages I have.

My breath catches, vague traces of pain from my arm as I clutch at my chest. The mark, it's gone. I don't have any fire anymore.

It's gone! How the heck is that possible? It was, like, infused into me! That can't just go away! How? Just, how? Surely something that's been so woven into me can't just be yanked out so easily?

My lungs heave, thoughts of Lukas searing into my head. Is he okay? I know the fire affected him too, even gave him physical buffs. Are those gone? I know he was overwhelmed when the connection first... connected, which feels so long ago, but is he alright now? It must feel funky, but then again the connection wasn't always active. He said that he doesn't feel anything when I'm asleep, so would it be that bad if it was just like that all the time now? I'm sure my emotions were a hassle anyway, I sometimes, actually most of the time, didn't even want them.

Shouldn't I be happy about this then? The fire did cause a lot of problems. I mean, sure, it saved my life a couple times, but it put my friends in jeopardy. Because of the fire, I got possessed. Because I got possessed, the demons came out. And because of the demons, people have died and Redstonia is destroyed.

Groaning, I just can't find a shred of relief about it though. Clenching my teeth, I swing my legs off the bed. My body shrieking, panicked at the thought of supporting itself without the fire. So many cuts, scratches, bites, bruises, dead muscles, and starved bones screaming at me that I can't get up, that such a thing won't happen.

I shake the thought away, a healing burn mark on my neck bristling at the sudden action, and push myself up. My legs instantly wobbling beneath me, aching arms swinging frantically to keep my balance. A rush of blood swarming my eyes, cool streams of nausea attacking my stomach.

Falling back on the bed, I ride out the head rush. My body moaning at the decision to stand, although I still force one of my arms to grab the water bottle on the nightstand. Instantly drowning it of its contents, which doesn't actually make my stomach feel better. So I eat another potato, the bloated sensation acting as an anchor for my balance.

Taking a few deep breaths, some of the pain fading, but mostly not. Still though, I have to get up. My town needs me, and I'm not going to sit here wondering if everyone's doing okay or not. I'm not stewing in those questions, I'm seeing it for myself.

Gritting my teeth, I push myself up again. My balance holding on this time, my legs still wobbling threateningly beneath me. My legs, which haven't actually been injured like the rest of me, still can barely hold me up. My muscles withering and tight and almost collapsing.

I stay standing for a few moments longer, adapting to the shots of misery from my ribs that don't like the changes and the fact weight is going through them now. Most of me also hating the decision to stand while it's trying to heal, but I'm just going to have to deal. I have to make sure everything's okay.

I try to take a step, and my body lurches forward. My legs staggering a few steps as they wobble and collapse, nausea claiming me as air rushes out of me. My head spinning once it crashes against the floor. When I groan and lift my throbbing skull, black dots speckled in my sight.

Gritting my teeth, I drag my legs under me. My arms trembling as I try to put weight on them, folding up and my shoulder crying out as it hit right into the ground. Thank goodness that area is snitched up, I would hate to bleed all over the floor.

Since my own body can't get up on its own anymore, man I wish I had some sort of flame right now, perhaps I could make a cane out of something? We're the Order of the Stone, there's got to be some sort of sword close by.

While there's no sword just laying around, I do spot a bow. Probably Olivia's or Lukas's, seeing how whoever's room this was has turned into some sort of living room. Everybody must have been coming and going through here. Am I really in that bad of a condition?

Despite my tired heart, a shot of determination streaks through me. I still have a town to take care of, demons to dispose of. Everyone could qualify in a bad position, just look at the Redstonians, so I better get up and get a move on already. I killed a Wither Storm without some magical flame, I can get up without it.

Doing some weird crawl and lurching thing, my body really hates me right now, I grab it. Letting most my weight slide down it, as I'm finally able to stand again. At least balance and weight is kinda taken care of. Now I just need to move, that's not so hard. And once I move enough, either I'll get used to this pain or I'll loosen up a bit more.

My legs still quiver and shake beneath me as I stumble to the door, heavily leaning on the bow and using the wall once I walk out. My arms don't exactly agree with these decisions, the bite on one and the claw marks on the other burn as they try to heal despite everything I keep them doing. I'm definitely going to have to eat again soon.

Thoughts constantly bombard me head as I limp through the hallway. Some flying around frantically, terrified if the demons got into Champion City or not. Some shake with babbling fear, wondering if the loss of fire is going to have much more resounding affects and leave me weaker than when I first got it. Other shout and scream, furious at me for not even able to walk right when the Redstonian refugees have been through so much worse. Then there are the thoughts that pace around restlessly, ticking off calculations and predictions of food supplies and resources for the people.

Trying to shake that out, hissing quietly when my neck seethes from that burn mark, I try to get everything in order. Firstly, I need water. Secondly, since I probably wasn't trusted with controlling my hunger, I'm going to need to eat something more. Thirdly, ask my friends for knowledge. Fourthly, actually do something that a mayor is suppose to do. Best to talk to Olivia about that and check how the hospital is doing. Maybe if I haven't collapsed by that point, ask the fire people if they know what's happening to me.

I pant and lean against the wall for a moment, kicking myself for being so out of breath by just the little walk and bracing myself to have to go across the Treasure Hall. I never thought it would be so hard to cross it, that I'm disappointed I don't have a wall to help me walk.

Scowling at myself, I push myself off the wall. Staggering across the meager distance and heavily relying on the bow to keep me upright. My legs threatening to collapse under me again, swaying this way and that even with the bow for balance. My lungs and heart strain themselves at the sudden need for oxygen.

Almost, just almost, I fall uncontrollably into the wall. Ignoring the cranky muscles, the bite, and the numerous other things that I've done to the arm as I lean against the wall. Gulping, I shuffle forward again. Why is walking so hard? No matter what has ever happened to me, I've always been able to walk.

"You don't understand!" I freeze momentarily at Lukas's shout, before hobbling forward just a bit faster. What's going on in the kitchen? "It feels like a part of me is gone! I can't just be happy about that, it doesn't work that way!"

I try not to make too much noise as I slowly stagger to the kitchen, ears straining for every word. Gosh, it's like I can feel the tension all the way from here. How the heck am I going to make this better?

"Lukas dude, just chill out about it. Is it really that big of a deal?"

"I must agree with Axel." So it's at least Ivor and Axel against Lukas, uneasy feelings pool in my semi-filled stomach as I shuffle closer to the door. "This whole fire thing has caused nothing but problems. It was around for a month or two, saved Jesse's life a few times, and now it's gone. I'd call this a nice and happy ending, we quite frankly deserve one."

"No! No you aren't getting it!" A tinge of... guilt? Sorrow? Distress? A tinge of something crawls into my heart at Lukas's frustrated shouts, my wobbling legs forgotten as I try to keep hobbling forward. "I know the fire wasn't exactly a good thing most of the time-"

Petra snorts. "You think?"

"-But you guys never got to see the full picture. It made him happy, it really did. It was exciting when we figured out new stuff, or he got the hang of a trick. Three days, he's been sleeping for three days since the fire was stripped of him. He probably would have... I dunno, something bad would've if the fire left at an earlier point."

The whole swarm of thoughts vanish, just like that. Only an emptiness swirling chaotically with all the pain. I know I shouldn't be so affected by this, the others make really good points. Yet when I instinctively reach out to feel the flames, to have them flicker in my mind, it's cold. So cold and empty and just barren.

"I beg to differ, if it left earlier, say after the whole Redstonia thing, then we wouldn't be in this problem at all. Sure the refugees would still need attending to and whatnot, but at least we wouldn't be trapped inside as demons wait for us to eventually get hungry enough and leave!"

Gulping, and getting a firmer grip on the bow as my legs continue to shake violently, I lunge at the door handle for support. I'm not letting my friends fight over me, not happening.

"Oh come on-"

The room freezes as I swing the door open, self consciousness slapping me right across the face when I remember that not only am I barely standing using a bow as a cane, but I probably look terrible and dead with my gray eyes. Gray eyes that I've completely forgotten about until now. Suddenly, I don't feel comfortable in my own skin, I don't feel right at all.

"Jesse!" And Lukas is already on his feet. "You look terrible! How are you feeling? What was it that got you out of bed? Are you hungry? There was suppose to be five potatoes when you got up, there's-"

"Lukas." He stops and I wince at my sickly voice, oh I better not be catching some bug. "Can you-"

Without the support of the wall, my legs give a violent wobble. Collapsing again from underneath me, bow falling helpless to the floor, as my vision swims in another blood rush. Dehydration... ravenous... and injured from head to toe, where is my fire when I need it?

Lukas grabs a hold of me, Petra on my other side in a flash. "It's okay, we've got you. And for goodness sake's Jesse, it's not going to kill you if you stay in bed. It probably will if you keep getting out though."

"Hey... just put me on the chair?" I cough, trying to make my voice sound somewhat okay. "Please? And some food and water?"

Petra huffs, and with a grumble, Lukas helps to drag me along. My feet staggering along with them until I lower into a chair, my legs sighing out in utter relief to finally stop holding me up. Although they better recover fast, I still need to go check the town.

"Hey, wait a moment." Suspicion leaks into Lukas's voice, and my eyes flicker to him. "Why did you get out of bed Jesse?"

He narrows his eyes at me, and I shrug, my neck burning at shoulder seething its misery at me, as I avoid eye contact. I honestly can't think of anything to say to him. Well, at least not anything that leads to him tying me onto the bed.

"Hey, don't interrogate him!" Axel sets down a bottle of water and bowl of watermelon, glaring at Lukas. "Just calm down a moment will ya?"

Lukas scoffs, and I quickly gobble down a watermelon as I see a storm of emotions brewing on his face. "Jesse, you shouldn't be up. You know that, you could have seriously hurt yourself when-"

Petra huffs, the fight must not have finished despite my presence. "Well, he didn't. You don't have to hover over him all the time Lukas. You two don't have your magical bond thing, just get over it."

A flash of anger, taking even me by surprise, roars up at Petra. Instinctively, I expect the fire to fan up. To defend Lukas, to do anything. But still, absolutely nothing! Just this lack of... energy and passion.

"Whoa! Why am I suddenly the bad guy here?"

"Dude, you just need to wind down. Jesse isn't on a deathbed anymore, just cool it."

"Shut it." I growl, slightly panting as I can't handle all these emotions. This burning desire to have that same fire again so I can put out this fight and kicking myself for wishing for something so dangerous, I can do it myself. "Since you all have so much energy to burn off, I'm sure Olivia could use your help wherever she is."

"Jesse, your condition is very unstable right now." I sigh as Ivor speaks, so bitter and overwhelmed all at the same time. "If I leave then there's no one-"

"I'm sure the hospital could use you more than me. Axel, Petra, grab some water bottles and go kill a few demons for me please. The more they die the less trapped we are."

They all shuffle out the door and I drain the glass of water, almost ready to drop dead right now. I know Lukas is still in here, and I want to talk to him, but who knew it was so exhausting just being awake for a couple of minutes?

"Jesse-"

"Nope." I sigh, wanting to rub my face but not wanting to move my arm. "Just, let me breathe for a moment."

Lukas sighs too, flopping down on a chair as I munch on more watermelon. Honestly, I can't give any heed to my stomach when my head is this barfed up slew of everything I wish I didn't have to pay attention to.

Huffing, I tear into the watermelon. Familiar strands of anger, helpless frustration gnawing at me. I can't even get up without assistance, pitiful. I can't do anything because the two things I've relied on, mental strength from Lukas and physical strength from the fire, have both vanished. Leaving me empty and hallow. A husk of my former self. It doesn't help that my spirit is also charred still.

Lukas suddenly groans, leaning forward and smacking his forehead against the table. "I can't tell you how many questions I want to ask you right now."

"Well I have a few for you." I dig into another watermelon, letting the emotions dull out with my bodily pain. "How are the refugees doing?"

"Refugees are recovering. The food supply has been counted and we should be good for about week until we need to start to ration or allow people out for food. Hospital supplies are wearing thin a bit, and while most people are still on edge there's been no mass amount of fear that has taken ahold of anyone. I don't know what you heard before shambling in, but everything's actually going relatively smoothly. "

"I only asked-"

"I know, and I know you were going to ask more." Lukas sighs, looking me right in the eye. "I figure that's the reason you got up in the first place right? Concern for the town?"

I say nothing, only nodding at him. The watermelon tastes bland in my mouth, and I can't even feel my stomach rejoicing with food in its stomach again. Everything's just so... wrong right now.

"I'm not wrong, am I?" I almost wince at the confusion and desperation tangling up in Lukas's voice. "My reactions at least. This is terrible, I feel so-"

"Empty?" I look up at him, my lips twitching up into an empathic smile. "Part horrified and part resent for not being happy about it? After all the grief it gave us, and how confused we were when it first came, you would think we would be happy it's gone."

"Which is why I can't be completely mad at the others for thinking that way, but still, can't they try to understand that it's not the same? I mean, if I just knew you woke up, I could have at least helped you into the kitchen if you were being too stubborn to lay back down again."

Sadness wraps around my heart, my smile still staying up. "Yeah... probably. But I know I won't be able to get into town, so I won't put up any fight with that."

The urge to yawn, almost an ache in my jaw, catches my attention. Thoughts scattered a bit as all the pain and stiffness in my body just groans in exhaustion. But I've been up less than an hour and I've been sleeping for days, I can deal with being up for a bit longer.

"Are you.. I mean, you look like your emotions changed." Lukas scratches the back of his neck, shifting uncomfortably. "Tired maybe? Depressed? Ah, sorry. You probably don't want me to blurt out what I think you're feeling."

I frown a bit, fighting my drooping eyelids as I feel so awful about everything. Lukas went from knowing to not in an