Abhi was damn glad to be out of the hospital.

He was especially glad that he would never have to watch Dr. Aman eye up Pragya ever again.

Now that he had his memory back, he could go to his appointments alone.

In fact that was just one of many, many upsides to finally being recovered.

The trouble was, there was one very real downside.

Pragya was bent on leaving him.

"I'll move my things to the guest room," she said, and then she ignored him as he tried to tell her he didn't want that.

"I'm moving back to my mother's house tomorrow," she said, and then she turned her back and walked away before he could tell her absolutely not.

"Do you think we could book a lawyer?" she asked, and finally she stayed put long enough to let him actually answer.

"Book a lawyer for what?"

"For our divorce. Since it's by mutual agreement -"

"I haven't agreed."

She shook her head at him, her eyes popping with exasperation. "We agreed before your injury. Now that you're better -"

"I didn't agree then either. You just left."

"Because you beat up my cousin!"

"Right. I'm going to apologize to him for that."

"Well good, you should!"

"Well, I will."

"That doesn't change anything. We still need to make arrangements -"

"Chashmish, haven't you been listening to me? I told you in the hospital. I want to stay together, I want us to -"

"I don't."

"Liar."

"Why would I be lying!" Pragya crossed her arms, shaking her head at him. "What don't you understand? Our marriage was a mistake, we have no future -"

"Galat." Abhi took her elbow and steered her onto the sofa. For a split second he debated sitting next to her, but this wasn't a time for half measures. He kneeled to the floor in front of her.

"What are you doing?" She tugged at his shoulder, trying to pull him up.

"I need you to listen to me." He took both her hands in his. He didn't miss how a slight shiver ran through her at his touch.

"Suniye -"

His hands clenched on hers involuntarily. He looked up into her beautiful, uncooperative face. "Pragya, please talk to me. I don't want to go on in this same circle of you saying it started as a mistake so we have to end it. We've been through so much together, doesn't that count for something? Why don't we have a future?"

He would have kept talking; there were a hundred more questions he could form, a thousand frustrations that wanted to spill past his lips.

But her huge, gorgeous eyes were filling with tears, the trembling liquid magnified by her glasses.

"It's not enough, don't you understand?" Her hand spasmed in his hold, as if she wanted to break free. He held on tight.

"What's not enough? Jaan -"

"Don't call me that!" a glare slashed across her face, but he didn't let it quail him.

"Jaan," he said again, keeping his voice slow and deliberate, "How could it not be enough? We have everything. We -"

"We have nothing!" She got to her feet, pushing him away roughly. "I stayed to help you get better, that doesn't mean we share something -"

"But -"

"Don't you get it, rockstar? Everything about us is wrong, it has been from the beginning. There is no happy marriage between Pragya Arora and Abhishek Mehra. There's only a mistake, a mismatch -"

Abhi grabbed her wrist. "Wait, just wait. Are you going to ignore everything we have in common, everything that unites us? Why do you think none of that matters?"

"None of what! We don't have anything in common, we -"

"We're both stubborn as hell, to start with."

"That's -"

"We both care about our families. We both would do anything in the world for their happiness -"

"Staying in a loveless marriage is not going to bring my family any happiness, thank you very much. So if you'll just --"

"Loveless? Loveless?" Abhi couldn't believe Pragya didn't feel the love that had grown between them. "Is that the problem, I haven't told you I love you? Pragya, I -"

"You don't love me. You can't love me. You -"

"You need to be quiet and listen to me. What will it cost you, huh? Please will you just sit down?"

The look on her face stole his breath. Anger wrapped up in fear, defiance and defensiveness rolled into one. It hit him like a lightning bolt - his new mission in life was to make sure nothing ever put that look on her face again.

Thankfully she sat down on the bed, her arms crossed tightly across her chest as she looked up at him in expectant silence.

Abhi knelt in front of her again, setting one hand gently on her knee. "Pragya..."

She bit her lip, the flat edge of her tooth savagely pressing into the plump, pink flesh. Again she was hurting herself because of him. He needed to break her of that habit.

He reached up and freed her lip with his thumb. She flinched from his touch, so he drew back, but only enough to give her her space. Not enough to let her go. He wasn't going let her go.

"Suno..." he said, looking up into her eyes. "Ever since you came into my life...I've learned over and over again that impossible things can become possible."

She frowned slightly, her forehead creasing in concern. But he forged ahead.

"The man you married...you're right, he couldn't love you. I was too angry, too selfish, too blind."

She looked away from him then, turning her head as a hint of anger tightened her mouth. He thought he saw the glimmer of tears again.

God this speech was so hard to give.

But she was here, listening, and he needed to tell her everything.

"But Pragya, I...I'm not that man anymore, you have to believe me. And it's not just because of the attack and my memory and all of that. You changed me. Being with you has changed me."

Pragya looked at him with an incredulous expression. "How could I change you? You think I'm -"

"I've said a lot of stupid things, jaan, but I haven't really told you what I think. That's what I'm trying to do now."

"I wish you would stop calling me that," she murmured, her eyes scanning his face restlessly.

"Well, I can't," he said with a grin. "And it's your fault. Who told you to become my everything, huh?"

She shot to her feet, pulling her hands free and stepping back from him. "Don't be ridiculous."

"It's like you don't want to hear that I love you!" Abhi said, exasperated. He was trying to get through the most important speech in his life and she just wouldn't cooperate.

"I don't want - I don't believe - it doesn't matter what you say, rockstar. Nothing you can say changes who we are, and we are not meant to be together, ok? We are -"

"No, it's not ok! Chashmish, itni bhi dheet mat bano yaar. Why are you convinced nothing can change? We just lived through the four craziest months of our lives. Everything changed."

She shook her head. "You don't understand. You're grateful now, because I was here for you, but it doesn't mean anything, it doesn't change anything -"

"Pragya, will you let me tell you what it changed? I've learned to trust, because you've shown me what it's like to have someone to trust. I've learned to hope, because you showed me what it's like to never give up. And yes, damn it, I've learned to love. Because you showed me it's worth everything. Worth the fear, worth the pain, worth the risk. Baby, do you understand what I am saying? I've become the man who loves you. And I won't let you walk away from me now."

****

Pragya stared into Abhi's face, stunned by his passionate words. He was speaking like he really meant it, like all these impossible, overwhelming statements he was making came straight from his heart.

But how could she believe that? Sure he was talking now like a man in love, but that could change. She had so much bitter experience of his silver tongue, his flawless ability to charm the world at large while being nothing less than a demon to her.

He had called her boring, ugly, selfish, a hundred other things that she'd had to pretend didn't hurt. But it did hurt, every little tormenting moment of their past. Months of constant rejection and misunderstandings and blame. She carried it all with her still.

She'd thought she was OK. She'd thought she could get through this, that the same inner strength and resilience that got her through every other setback in her life would be enough to get through this too. Through this sham of a marriage, through the absolutely necessary divorce, through the fallout of having failed as a wife.

But she hadn't counted on this. On him offering her his heart, on him insisting that there could be something more between them than majboori and compromise.

Looking into his infuriatingly handsome face, she couldn't think straight. It was like all the blood in her body had rushed to her heart, pumping through it in overtime. She was drowning in a wave of emotion so strong she couldn't think clearly.

"Pragya?" Abhi's voice was whisper-soft. She watched as he came towards her, the intensity on his face shifting to concern. He took hold of her elbows and sat her down on the bed again, but this time he sat with her.

His hand cupped her jaw, holding her so gently that suddenly she had to blink back tears. For the fraction of a second that her eyes were closed, the sensation seared itself into her mind - the feeling of being held by a man who said he loved her, as if she were the most precious thing in the world.

Then she took a deep breath, and started speaking the truth of her heart.

"Suniye...I wish I could accept what you are saying, but I don't think you have enough perspective. You've just been through something -"

"I don't have enough perspective to know my own feelings? That's -"

"Just listen to me! You and I, we could never have a successful relationship, because nothing has ever been normal between us. What you think you feel now, it's not real, given time it will go away. We can't make any commitments on the basis of temporary feelings."

He shook his head, anger and disbelief shading his features. "You really are so dheet, Chashmish. Mann mein ek bakwas idea tik gaya toh tik hi gaya. Why can't you be open to the possibility that things can change? We -"

"But that's exactly what I am saying! Things do change, feelings do change. We don't have enough in common to build a life together, and whatever we feel for each other now, when things are normal it will all change. You'll remember all over again that you never wanted to marry me -"

Abhi set a finger to her lips, and she fell silent. He studied her for a moment, and then he said in a soft, dangerous voice, "And what do you feel for me, Chashmish?"

She flinched back from him, unprepared for this question. How could she answer that? Her feelings shouldn't matter here. They had to make a reasonable decision.

He lifted his hand to her jaw again, turning her head so that she had to meet his gaze. "Batao mujhe. What do you feel for me now?"

"I - I feel happy that you've recovered," she said cautiously. Impatience flashed in his eyes but he didn't interrupt. "I feel relieved that our natak can be over now -"

"This is not what I meant and you know it. What do you feel for me?"

She closed her eyes, unwilling to look at him. The truth was fighting to spill past her lips, and looking into his eyes would not help her self-control.

A moment passed in silence. She could feel the heat of his gaze on her but she stayed silent, unwilling to let the chaos of her feelings out into the word.

"Jaan," he growled, his voice quite different - but familiar, because she had heard this irritation in his voice so many times before the accident - "Why are you so hard on yourself? Do you think if you don't say anything, I won't know? I won't know that you love me?"

"I don't -" but the rest of the sentence refused to leave her mouth. She wanted so much to push him away, to stay safe, but she couldn't say it. She couldn't say I don't love you.

She got up off the bed, pacing away restlessly. She wrapped her arms around herself, rubbed them absently. Was she cold inside or out? How did it matter, when it felt like she might never be warm again?

He came to her. He wound his arms snug around her waist and pulled her against his chest. "I don't deserve you and I know it."

A tiny sound escaped her, pained protest, but he continued on, unheeding.

"You didn't stay with me all this time just out of duty. Duty doesn't touch a sick man with softness. Duty doesn't go out of its way to protect someone from the truth. Duty doesn't give a damn about anything but the bare necessities. Pragya, what you've been doing for me all these weeks isn't duty."

He turned her in his arms, holding her by her shoulders. "Give over, jaan. The only way you could stand to stay with me was if -"

"Just because you lack imagination," she lashed out, fear driving her to the offense, "Doesn't mean there's only one reason. You think everyone either hates you or loves you. Guess what rockstar, sometimes people just don't care about you, and I'm one of them!"

He let go of her, the hopeful look in his eyes dimming. But his voice lacked any bite as he said, "Ek aur jhoot. Really Chashmish, don't you get tired of the constant nataks? I'm trying to tell you -"

"You're not listening!" She resisted the urge to stomp her foot like a young girl. "I don't want to be with you and I don't want to stay in this marriage!"

"But why?" Abhi held her gaze. "Even if all of that is true, you haven't told me why."

"I've been telling you over and over! I don't want to stay because what we have isn't real, it's a mistake. We don't have anything in common and we don't belong together -"

"Where do you think you belong, huh? In Chembur, married to that Double Battery?"

"W-what?"

"You want to go back to your old life like none of this ever happened, like I mean nothing to you."

"I -"

"But it did happen, all of it, and we can't take that back. We can't change the past and we can't change what it's done to us. Yes, it started as a mistake. We didn't have anything in common, we didn't belong together then. But we're not the same as we were in the beginning. What we've been through has done something to us."

She didn't want to ask, but the question tore free anyway. "What has it done to us?"

"It's made us fall in love."

His words felt like a whiplash across her face. The sting of them bit into her skin, snapped her neck back with sudden force.

How could he just...say that? Just put it out into the world like it was safe to say that?

Didn't he know he was inviting nazar?

"No," she said, her voice shaking. She wrapped her arms tight around herself, suppressing the trembling running through her. "That's not what happened. We tolerated each other, we learned to get along -"

"I don't understand. Why are you denying the truth? We love each other. We belong together."

"I don't care what you think," she said, speaking past the bitterness of the lies filling her tongue. "The past four months have been nothing but torture and misery for me, and I'm not staying with you. I wouldn't stay married to you if you were the last man on earth."

He stared at her then, long and hard, and she found herself hoping that it was enough, that she'd finally said enough to turn him away - even though some treacherous tiny corner of her heart wanted him to keep fighting.

"You...you say you don't want this, but I don't believe you. And guess what Chashmish, you don't get a choice. I love you, whether you like it or not."

A bewildered laugh broke from her. "W-what? That's absurd -"

"But it's true. Your resistance, your defensiveness, whatever this is - I understand, you don't want me to get close to you, you don't want me in your life. But I'll tell you right now, whatever happens, even if you walk away from me - I love you Pragya Mehra, and I will never stop loving you."

***

Abhi was at his wit's end. She met his every declaration with a new objection and now his brain had nothing left to give to the fight.

He was all heart, raw and open, and he could only pray it would be enough.

If only he were a praying man.

She shook her head, and he felt his heart crack down the middle.

"Suniye...I'm sorry. This would never work."

She turned to face him, and he was surprised by how troubled her face was. She spoke with certainty, but her eyes were full of doubt. Could it be that she didn't really believe what she was saying? Was there still a chance?

He felt beyond frustrated. Everything he never knew he wanted was standing in front of him, but he could not find the words to say that would stop her from leaving.

What was he supposed to do when he felt so hopeless?

"I used to think..." Pragya started, and the tentative tone of her voice made Abhi's heart leap in hope. He turned to her.

"Yes?"

"I used to think, maybe, if we could set aside our differences, if we tried to make it work...then yes, maybe, there could be a future for us."

"But that's what I'm saying! We can choose to make it work, to move forward together -"

"I used to think that, like a daydream or a fantasy, when it wasn't possible. But now that it's possible, I feel like...I can't forget. I can't just put aside everything that went wrong between us. I'm sorry."

"No, don't be sorry, because that means you are giving up. Let me ask you this, can you forget everything that went right? Can you forget every time we laughed together, every time that Daadi or Sarla Aunty smiled because we brought them peace? Can you forget every moment of the past four weeks, when we behaved like a real couple?"

"You weren't yourself -"

"I was more myself than I've been in months. Pragya, when I wasn't distracted by the lies and games between us, all I could see was you. How perfectly you fit into my life. How genuine and loving you are. How you're the best thing to ever happen to me."

"But...you're not the best thing that ever happened to me."

Her words fell like a bomb between them, the air vibrating with the force of her feelings.

It hurt to hear that, to face that her feelings for him were apparently the complete opposite of his.

Abhi knew he had hurt her, but to hear her reject him so completely stunned him.

If she didn't think he was the best thing to happen to her..if she truly couldn't forgive and forget his mistakes...how could they go on?

He felt the bleakness wash over him, a wave of despair that deflated his lungs. She really didn't want him.

But as he stared at her, noticing the lines of tension locking her limbs, the set expression on her face that looked more like determination than disgust, something told him not to give up.

The wave of despair rolled back, replaced by the certainty he felt in his bones about his own feelings.

He loved this woman. He loved her even more for her zidd, for the fierceness of her self protection. It was frustrating as hell that she wanted to keep walls between them, but despite everything, he could understand it.

He had hurt her. He had not given her even one-tenth of the care and respect that she had given him. She was not ready to accept his love because he had not proven that he could be the good, kind, responsible partner she needed.

The kind of partner she was herself.

All of it suddenly made sense to Abhi. And he hated it, hated not winning, hated that they could not just move on