I suddenly sit up straight in my bed. I don't remember much from last night and it doesn't seem like I had any dream. And all of a sudden tears well up in my eyes, slowly falling down. I don't feel sad about anything and my mind is blank. But for some reason the tears still keep racing down. Emotionless, meaningless but innocent. After some time I burst out crying. A feeling of homesickness possesses me all of a sudden. But not of literal home. The feeling of home. I want to go back. I want to see my people. I want to feel home. I squeeze my knees up towards my chest and hold it there as I shuffle inside my blanket. 

*            * *             * *

The following Monday Visca still didn't find Steven in his bus when their buses once again enter the campus side by side. Disappointed, still hopeful she kept looking around the corridors to be able to look for him. Around the second period she peeped into his class and saw his newspaper print bag on one of the desks. But still he wasn't in sight. She did not know for sure if he was the only one with that bag so she had to ask someone. Her eyes darted at every being leaving or entering his classroom when all of a sudden she sees a familiar face. This girl too an old acquaintance of her.

"Has Steven been around today?", she asked her when she was close enough to hear.

"Oh yes. He's present. Been back after a holiday and turned into a real monkey.", she rolled her eyes.

A feeling of satisfaction swept over Visca and she went back to her normal days without looking around anymore. In recess that day when she was around with Alex she saw him in the corridor in front of his class hanging around with a boy for the first time. He seemed to not notice her at all and for some reason she did not want to be around him in front of so many people either. And he looked different that day too. He apparently had a haircut that I had never seen him in before. Following her gaze Alex insisted on talking to him so when his friends started going in the two of them went to him and he stopped.

"I did not know you had come today.", she said and smiled.

"Why were you guessing though?"

"Well your bus seemed to have crossed ours and I did not see you on the second last seat."

"I overslept today so I missed the bus.", he laughed.

"Oh okay."

"Yep, so I got late as I had to take the next bus."

He said the last line as he stared inside his classroom. And without another word he left. For the first time it did not feel like she had been talking to him at all. For the first time he did not feel like an old friend. For the first time she felt cold around him.

*            * *             * *

I don't know for how long I lay like that but the morning light peeping from the curtains suggested it was a few hours. I hadn't slept after I last woke up and for some reason the tears were still flooding. I leave my bed and go stand in front of the mirror. It is one thing to cry. And it is the most painful thing to look at your own red face while you're crying. But this is the only thing that makes me stronger. It gives me the strength to fight any feeling only to not see myself crying again. And it works. I walk to my bed and sit quietly this time. My mind clearing out and putting today's schedule in place of every other feeling.

*            * *             * *

"What's with the new haircut Steven?", asked Alex during dispersal when they coincidentally met each other outside. Visca holding one of her hands in a really funny mood laughed as she had been doing while talking to Andrew in the last period. He always did wonder to her mood.

Steven looked at her and then turned to Alex, "What's with it?".

"Well it looks strangely familiar."

"Familiar?"

"Oh yes. It's very similar to the old homosapiens.", Alex laughed and Visca joined in.

"Well thank you."

"Do not mention."

Visca suddenly popped into the conversation saying, "Oh she's kidding." and laughed again.

"Okay.", he said trying to ignore the two of them.

"You know I've been thinking of telling you this since a long time. I was thinking of a short name for you and I came up with Steve. This is like the best nickname ever. So I'll call you Steve. Okay?"

"I don't care.", said Steven raising his eyebrows at her.

Visca suddenly snapped into reality. Alex looked at her and Steven continued staring too. All the memories of the recess earlier that day came into her head and she fought hard with her daze to try to come with something to reply to him with.

"Yeah right.", was all she could say as she turned around and walked away.

*            * *             * *

I leave my room half an hour before my lectures just like everyone else to find my classmates ringing my cell and calling me downstairs. I look for them at the reception and the three of us set off for our classes together. 

*            * *             * *

A couple of weeks later Visca came back to the library in her library period from the washroom to find Steven's class combined with theirs and making a noisy library together. Also, to her surprise her own seat was taken by the only girl she hated the most in her class. Furious she stormed towards her and jerked her chair in a way the girl almost fell to the front but smartly she kept holding on and quickly sat down back in position.

"Move!", screamed Visca.

"Why? Don't you see I'm sitting here?"

"Didn't you see me sitting right here earlier."

"No I didn't know you were sitting her honestly. I just came by to talk to Tap and I found this seat empty. Why don't you sit somewhere else? There are many empty ones that side.", she said pointing on the opposite direction where she saw Steven sitting among many other people. He signalled her to come sit in front of him to which Visca rolled her eyes and jerked her chair again.

"Why should I go there? Why can't you go there instead?"

"I told you I am talking to Tap."

"I don't care this was my seat. If you want to talk to her so bad you better bring you chair along."

"Okay fine I'll go with you Visca. Come let's go to that side.", Tap interrupted standing up.

Visca looked over at Steve who was still gesturing his hands towards the empty space in front of him. 

This time Visca whispered a sharp "No!" 

To which he said "Please.".

"But you said you don't care.", she synced her lip to which he laughed for a moment. 

Then said "I care. I care.", but in vain.

Visca jerked the chair once and saw Steven laugh again from the corner of her eyes while covering his face in his hands.

"Come on Visca. Let's go.", said Tap picking up her chair and walking towards the other side. Visca following closely.

"In the end you came back you could have come when I asked you to.", said Steven when they reached the other side. 

"I came cause she asked me to.", snapped Visca pointing at Tap who smiled.

"Okay I'm sorry I shouldn't have said it that day."

"Alright.", sneered Visca.

Steven smiled back.

*            * *             * *

Classes today were just as nice as it were yesterday and the day before. Only difference was the number of students attending and it kept decreasing everyday. There is an ice cream parlour and a street food stall right outside our college campus where my bench mates Scarlett and Anna stopped by at the end of the day. They were probably starving so we ordered  two pastas and waited for them while checking out the international students flooding out of the main campus. Our university probably had too many campuses to be able to count but by now we knew not even half of it all. That is probably why I had given up on the thought of exploring it every morning standing right there looking over the streets at the numerous buildings in which it confided.

*            * *             * *

Many days went by when it would take almost half the day to find whether or not Steven had come to school and would be disappointed with either an absence or a day without any conversation. Around a month later she on a half day she called him up again and all she could hear was a loud music playing.

“Hey.”, he answered.

“What’s up?”

“You wanna know? Okay. Apparently I just woke up right now and if you can listen to it I’m in front of the TV and listening to your favourite singer Taylor Swift.”

“Yeah I can hear it.”, she said referring to “ready for it” playing in the background.

“So how was your day?”

“What would go wrong with my day. It was the same schedule, studying and all. Oh and Alex and me bunked a class together.”

“And where did you go?”

“First we played badminton in the ground with kids and spent the rest of the time escaping from the evil games teachers.”

“They wouldn’t do nothing even if you kept playing.”

“Senior girls have a different uniform.”

“Oh right.”

“Yeah and we had Sam with us too so like she had this big group of people on the top floor so we ended up going there in the last."

“That was fun. Which period?”

“The last period.”

“What subject did you bunk though?”

“English”, laughed Visca.

“Worth it.”, he joined in.

“In the bus though Stuart, Sam and I played a lame version of stone, paper, scissors.”

“What was lame?”

“Everything except the game. Okay see we toss as usual and the guy wins he gets a kiss from the girl and if he loses he gets slapped.”

“Oh my god. Who the fuck taught you this?”

“Well this girl told me her friend played it with her so I just tried.”

“So did Stuart win or lose?”

“It kept on going though and we left it in the middle but he owes me 15 slaps.”

At this the two of them laughed and then silence prevailed for a long time. Visca was listening to the music and she thought probably so was he.

“Don’t you use Facebook?”, asked Steven.

“Oh yes but very less.”

“Wanna talk online today?”

“Yeah obviously.”

“What time would be comfortable for you?”

“May be towards the evening?”

“Do ping me. We need to talk.”

“Oh okay sure.”

“I’ll hang up then. Gotta freshen up you know.”, he laughed.

“Oh right.”, she giggled before hanging up.

*            * *             * *

I walk back towards our hostel campus after completing the two plates full of pasta. We were full and satisfied.

“Will I able to have the dinner of our dining after having such good food outside?”, said Scarlett.

“Exactly. What is the menu tonight?”

“I don’t know but nothing good.”, said Anna.

“Done then. I’m bunking dinner today.”

“Me too.”, both of them joined.

We reached the stairs and sabotaged each other on the third floor as Scarlett went towards her room there. Back in my room I  lay on my bed as I throw my bag away on the chair. I go through my cellphone. A familiar number runs inside my head but I cannot dial it right now. I throw it away too and succumb to a small nap.

*            * *             * *

Sharp at 21:00 Visca steals her home WiFi to work for a project and finds Steven online. They did have half broken small conversations on Facebook earlier but they had seldom been online at the same time. Reason being that Visca used it very less. She hurriedly wrote a ping.

dArk_viScA: Hey.

Steven_Trust: Oh hi just on time.

dArk_viScA: Eh?

Steven_Trust: Well I lost hope you would ever be online today and I was gonna leave.

dArk_viScA: And here I am.

Steven_Trust: Yes. What are you doing?

dArk_viScA: Talking to you?

Steven_Trust: And?

dArk_viScA: And nothing. You had to talk.

Steven_Trust: Yeah I’m coming to that.

dArk_viScA: Tell me.

Steven_Trust: Okay. There is a big issue going on and it is a secret. But I wanted to share it with you. I would probably need your help.

A pang of excitement leapt into her chest. She did not know why but having to keep a secret of his all to herself made her feel real special in his life.

dArk_viScA: Does anyone know about it yet?

Steven_Trust: No one as of now.

dArk_viScA: Go on.

Steven_Trust: Okay. I don’t know how to say this. XD

dArk_viScA: Cut it out already now. -_-

Steven_Trust: Fine listen. I have a crush in school.

Another bolt of a volcano of butterflies opened somewhere inside her and started flooding her chest with loud fluttering. She held her cell with a little more grip. Who could it be?

dArk_viScA: Who’s that?

Steven_Trust: I cannot tell you the name yet.

dArk_viScA: Damn you just spit it out man.

She kept shivering under her skin by now.

Steven_Trust: No I can hint you though but you guess and ask me at school tomorrow. I’ll tell you if you are right or wrong.

dArk_viScA: Just say it Steve. That is enough.

Steven_Trust: Shall I go for the hint?

dArk_viScA: Okay hurry up.

Steven_Trust: Her name is A*******a.

A gust of words rushed into her head. She instantly started typing every random name she knew starting and ending with an A. She deleted each name right after typing as her mind pondered on whether he knew any such name or if that name was in close proximity to both of them. As every name got canceled at that she typed again.

dArk_viScA: Do I know this girl?

Steven_Trust: Yes you know her probably.

She now started believing no such girl existed in school and somehow hoped she could be the girl. She kept hoping he would say it was all a joke and that Visca was the one. But suddenly a name popped into her head. Penelope was her classmate and she had spent some really fun time with her together. This girl had one of the biggest gangs she knew of and one of those girls Anastasia, a small girl studied in the commerce class which was Steven’s class as well. Just to try it out she typed the name slowly and sighed before sending. 

dArk_viScA: Anastasia?

Steven_Trust: How on earth did you guess it so right?

A sudden huge weight made her body as still as rock. It felt like all the butterflies turned into dust and covered her whole chest. But not just that. The dust kept settling and turning to stone and made her sink down into her pillow. She kept her head buried as the weight increased from every portion of the body and she felt too hot. Somehow she pulled herself up to reply.

dArk_viScA: Oh my god I’m so happy for you. When did this happen?

Steven_Trust: One day when she spoke to me for the first time. She was polite and all plus she is the first person who spoke to me from this batch. She is the reason I’ve started having friends.

dArk_viScA: Wow. And what help do you require? Just go tell her.

Steven_Trust: No I still want her to first know me. And I want you to help me with that.

dArk_viScA: How?

Steven_Trust: Well for instance since you know her and you people did talk a bit just ask her about me or tell her what you know about me. So that she starts noticing me.

dArk_viScA: I can do that.

Steven_Trust: Thank you very much Visca.

Beads of sweat had now started gathering on her forehead while the weight increasingly unbearable by now.

dArk_viScA: Steve, I feel heavy.

Steven_Trust: What? You gained weight?

She laughed at the back of her head but her face muscles did not move a centimetre.

dArk_viScA: XD

Steven_Trust: I made you laugh again. Wow.

dArk_viScA: Yeah. So I’ll leave now that you are done. I need to go.

Steven_Trust: Okay bye Visca. See you tomorrow.

She did not see the last message, switched her cell off and buried her head into her pillow again.

*            * *             * *