I decided to post the second chapter too, because it was already written and why the hell not. I think it is important part of the story that will make some things clearer :) It is not properly edited so excuse me if there are some weird parts - I will get around to edit it soon. Enjoy!

***

The sound of wind drifted through the room, gently moving the window blinds in a steady beat. The room smelled of dust and sex, mixed with the flowery scent of laundry softener that radiated from the sheets that were pushed on the floor last night.

Nellie pressed the white sheet closer to her body, biting her bottom lip to avoid a sob to escape her lips. The tears rolled down her cheeks, over her freckled nose and disappearing somewhere on the pillow. Her whole body shivered as she dared to take a deep breath. The stranger from the last night was sleeping on the other side of the bed, soundly and steady. She didn't dare to turn around to look at him because she was too embarrassed.

She slowly sat up, wiping the tears with the back of her hand, still shaking. It was her first one night stand and it made her feel dirty, embarrassed and guilty. She had rules to follow, rules she wasn't allowed to break; rules that made her regret being alive.

Silently, she reached down, picking up her bra and slowly clasping it behind her back, not bothering to pull up the straps. Few seconds later, she was pulling her panties up, standing up and pulling her crumped dress over her head, leaving the first two buttons in front undone. The man that she slept with stirred and she dreadfully turned around to look at him but heaved a sigh when she realised that he was still asleep.

With her beaten up chelsea boots in one hand, she scrambled her wallet and her phone from the table in the corner, and walked to the doors. Nellie stopped, twisting the doorknob, realising she would probably freeze outside in the harsh wind. After all she only wore the summery dress that was too thin for this part of the year anyway. Turning on her heel, she tiptoed to the corner and grabbed the denim jacket from the chair and in few quick strides, left the room.

"Nellie," George stirred softly but thinking she just left to use the bathroom, he went back to sleep.

***

Nellie was walking down the street, wrapping the denim jacket tighter around her body, crossing her arms around her. Her feet hit the concrete in a cautious way, feeling as if everyone around her knew what she did last night.

This is how walk of shame feels like. – she thought.

She was startled by her phone ringing in the pocket of his jacket and she scarily pulled it out. Nellie heaved a breath of relief seeing her friends name flashing on the screen. With a shaky hand she slid the caller and put the phone to her ear.

"Hello," she croaked out, her voice raspy.

"Nellie," Marcia's voice hissed from the other side of the line. "Where are you? Why didn't you text me back? Where have you been?" Her friend asked in a row, not giving a chance for Nellie to respond. The line went silent before Marcia spoke again, "He called me last night to ask me if you are babysitting Tim!"

"Di–," Nellie stopped on the bus stop, her eyes searching for the right bus line. She had been walking few blocks by now, running away from that motel she stayed at last night. "Did you tell him?"

"No," Marcia replied. "I said I asked you to keep an eye on Tim." Marcia's voice turned from harsh to soft.

"Thank you," Nellie whispered, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand. 

"But Nellie," Marcia let out a breath she was holding, "I won't be able to cover up for you for too long. Especially now that Tim is not on school break and I am not working night shifts. He could randomly pass by the bar and see that I am not there and then look for you."

"I know, Marcia." Nellie bit her lip. "I promise this is the last time I am doing this." The picture of the stranger smiling at her last night popped in her head and as much as she hated to admit, a small part of her didn't want to forget him. She blinked few times as she apologised to Marcia once again. "I hate to use you and I am being selfish but sometimes, it just gets too much."

"I know and I love you, Nellie," Marcia spoke softly, "but he is your husband and he won't tolerate it if he finds out about you going out alone in the shady bars of Portland."

"He won't know if you don't tell him."

"I won't," was Marcia's reply, "but just be careful."

The bus appeared in the distance and few people walked over to where she was standing, making her feel claustrophobic. With few goodbye words, Nellie finished the call, slumping her shoulders in defeat and climbing on the bus, letting people walk in before her.

With her head pressed on the cold vehicle window, she huddled the jacket around her, sniffing the musky scent that enveloped her nostrils – cigarettes and expensive perfume – that's how she's going to remember the night the most. The invisible traces of his touch will fade away from her skin, eventually, but the scent is something that Nellie couldn't get rid of.

And a part of her didn't want that either.

Twenty minutes after she exited the bus, Nellie walked up the small pathway that led to her house. She tried hard not to think of what would happen if he ever finds out about what she had done last night. At the mere thought of a scenario, the feeling of fear embraced her and she nervously bit her lip.

When she pushed the doors open as silently as possible, she noticed his shoes, placed neatly on the shoe rack. Seeing that he still didn't leave for work made her feel uneasy.With her heart beating wildly in her chest, she tugged down the jacket and stuffed it hastily in one of the shelves of the closet that they rarely used.

She grabbed a large hoodie from the coat hanger and dressed it, before retying her ponytail, making sure every hair was on its place. With a small intake of breath she opened the doors that led to the living area, smile creeping up on her face, seeing that he wasn't there. But her happiness was short timed, because as soon as she closed the doors, he walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey," she mumbled, pretending a yawn. 

Her husband Clive was looking at her, his cold eyes piercing her with familiar, uncomfortable feeling. She wondered if he could feel her fear and nervousness and when he gave her a smirk, she knew that the answer was positive. 

His arms were crossed on his chest as he leaned on the kitchen doorframe. Some would say that he was handsome but all Nellie could see was a man with stone instead of a heart, taking up space in his chest.

"Had fun with Tim?" he asked, walking next to Nellie and sitting on a couch. He turned on the television and folded his legs on top of the coffee table. Nellie nervously made her way to the kitchen, aware that he is expecting a breakfast soon.

"Yes," she called out, mentally promising herself that after what happened last night she is going to stop using Marcia's son as her excuse to act like she did. "But Marcia stopped working late shifts so I think I am done with babysitting," she added before she could change her mind. 

When she didn't get any answer,  she quickly cooked up some scrambled eggs, bacon and brewed some coffee as she heated up the bread rolls she made yesterday. Nellie carried the tray to the living room, placing it in front of Clive and he nodded, without looking away from the screen.

He stuffed some eggs in his mouth before speaking, "My parents called last night. Mimi wants us to go up north for grandpa's birthday." Nellie nodded, although he wasn't looking at her, "Mamma wants us to come earlier few days so you can help with cleaning his house." He said, emphasizing the word 'you'.

"Sure," she replied inattentively as Clive averted his gaze from the TV and narrowed his eyes at her.

"You don't sound too excited," he urged, slightly raising his voice. "Show some gratefulness, Anellise!" he spat.

Nellie shook her head, her body tensing in fear. "No, no, I am happy to see them again," she urged with a fake smile but in all honesty, she disliked his parents as much as she disliked her own family.

"Good." His head turned to the TV again. "We are leaving on Friday," he said curtly, the conversation dying between two of them.