Knowing we have two weeks left is far from reassuring when the void that's cutting the sky open grows larger every day. Sure, we could wait until the last moment and go bounding up the mountain to play Save The World: Speedrun Mode with Red, but risk-taking in the past has usually ended with me watching those I care about die.
I will miss this place on the days we've set aside to trek up the mountain, though. Once we got the generator up and running and did a little maintenance, the cottage in the woods went from decrepit and nasty to charming. We've even planted local flowers in the pots that were scattered around the basement. Reginae is reluctant to put his succulents anywhere that won't be a permanent residence, but some of my Pokemon are talking about that, too. If we finish this, where would we go? I might not be an adult yet, but I'm not a kid anymore, and the idea of moving back in with my mom (and Elm) is... awful.
To kick off the beginning of the worst week of my life (or the best, depending on how this goes), Suicune appears in front of the door one morning. They bare their usual, bored expression, with a side of haughtier-than-thou to go with all that smug. A recoiling, wet Ethan in the background tells me that Suicune was keen to give a the Lugia a spray in the face on their way in, just for kicks.
I wish Suicune would give the "abomination against nature" narrative a rest, but we don't have the typical trainer-Pokemon relationship going on. We trust each other about as much as two starving Mandibuzz in the desert.
Good morning. I've returned from council with the other legendaries once more, and it has been decided that the most fortuitous path would be for me to accompany you up the mountain. Even through telepathy, I can hear the distasteful resentment in their tone. They sound like they've just been told they'll be eating dirt for the next two weeks.
"Great. Where are these legendaries, anyways?"
My comrades are working to fix the rift in space-time you let Red open, Suicune says.
"Great," I repeat.
Furthermore, not all the legendaries are in agreement when it comes to you. Out of necessity, we all support you, but they fear trainers. Anyone who does not bow to their commands at once is a threat. Keep in mind that we can be caught in a petty Poke Ball if weakened. Do you think we would willingly appear to mortals, given that?
"Look, you don't need to tell me that you guys have bad management and that you throw your problems off on other people. I lived it. I know." I say. "Come on guys, we need to get going. Grab all the remaining bags, so they don't get raided while we're out, and let's go."
Suicune watches as the team files out. Crimson and Ethan, who are already outside, cast distrustful looks towards the great legendary Pokemon. My other Pokemon, however, are far more flippant.
"Pie?" asks Shika.
I am the North Wind, Suicune informs her, Mortal pleasure is beneath me.
"So, if you don't derive pleasure from being a stick in the mud, why do you do it?" asks Ferro, which prompts a swift turn and the angriest frown yet from Suicune.
"Right," I say, "Please stop provoking our only link to the Legendary council. If anything goes wrong, they're going to be our lifeline."
Suicune says nothing, but I sense approval.
The last few late sleepers finally pile out of the cottage hoisting bags, and the old place looks tired and grim without them. The windows shine with soft light from every time we've cleaned them, but the paint is sketchy as ever and the old patio whines as the last Pokemon (Millie) steps over it.
Everyone on the team is looking to me. I can feel their intensity in the way their bonds vibrate, like violin strings after a bow has raked across them. This is a fire I need to fan. I am the bow.
This was so much easier when a meaningful glance with my team could say everything I needed to say. The new team stands resolute towards the front, already raring to go, but the others are nervous as I am.
"It's been almost four years," I say. "Give or take a few months. For all we've been through, it might as well have been a lifetime. I can't imagine a better life than one surrounded by all of you. If we could spend the rest of our days like this, in peace, I can't imagine ever wanting for more."
The team murmurs in agreement. Bronze holds Lilly a little tighter. Hyacinth slumps against Reginae's side. Shika and Ten nod.
"Unfortunately, fate's not that kind to us. Right now, the weight of the world rests on our shoulders. We're doing this for us. For revenge, if we want to be really crude about it, but also for the greater good. For every family like ours that could be ripped apart by Red if we let him have his way again. For everyone we've already lost, and for the two years most of us have spent separated! Today, we fight as a family, and we scale that mountain and show Red what this family is capable. All for one. No 'mon left behind."
Bronze raises a skyward paw, clenching his claws into a fist. Fire billows in a ring around his neck as he declares, "For all of us with hearts of gold!"
The team erupts in cheers. Fang raises his muzzle and howls, which Dill happily joins. Sky, Khrys, and Hyacinth (of course) are quiet, but their expressions say enough.
"Let's go," Toxis says, and the team floods out of our glade and down the route.
I take the first step into the mountain.
The original team follows, pressing past me on all sides, and Reginae steps in behind them with equal trepidation. We flow smoothly, like a river running down a mountain, as we move through the cave. Suicune finds their own place at the helm, distant from the others but closest to Bronze, who leads at a pace worthy of Minerva. I wish the two could've met, but I also wish I could have everyone back. The loneliness follows me no matter where I go or whatever I'm given back.
My mind reviles against me, scolding me for being so selfish.
It's easy to slip back into the peaceful silence I knew when it was just the seven of us, since Bronze and Lilly have the old team settled on their own. Bronze gives out jobs and instructs everyone how to deal with the denizens of the cave (primarily Golbat and Graveller, to the dismay of Sky and Gaia). Ten and Dill prove to be proficient in knocking just about everything out, and the other Pokemon with a type advantage follow their lead.
Suicune fights little, always looking ahead, but the legendary also finds us a path up a cavern and out onto the open mountainside. It resembles the land below, though the trees are sparser, and the Pokemon every bit as unfriendly. They're not the kind, passive fighters of the routes of Kanto or Johto. They go for the trainer first, aim for the neck wherever possible, and in their eyes shine a savage vengeance.
They provide good experience.
When we do stop to rest, it's back indoors, a few chambers up from where we reentered the mountain. The room has numerous stalagmites and stalactites, making navigation a mess, but there's also a few rock formations that provide good cover. Crimson sits guard on the outside of one we've settled under, joined by Reginae and Bronze. Suicune is off in some other chamber, scoping out the area, and Ethan can't fit, but he still sticks his head in.
"Brrr. It's clammy in here." Lilly shivers. She's pressed into a corner, not of her own accord, and her new Ampharos wool is so fine and short that it's a wonder it provides her any cover.
"Did someone say clams? I would kill for some clams right now." Dill says, tail waving.
"Dill." Toxis groans.
"I lived by the ocean! We had a lot of seafood. Why didn't we purchase any seafood, again?"
"You didn't ask for any," Millie says, serving out another can of cold beans. "Tough luck, buttercup."
"Please don't talk about seafood. I'm going to lose my appetite." Ethan asks.
"Since when do you have an appetite?" Fang tilts his head.
"Good point," Ethan says, lying down on his hands.
I hear loud, excited arguing and squint towards those "keeping guard" on the outside. "I'll be right back," I say. As I approach the others, arms folded, I hear Bronze and Reginae at it again:
"There's a light in the distance. It could lead outside, and from there, we could set up camp somewhere in the wilderness." Reginae reasons. "I don't want to stop here."
"At this temperature? Are you crazy?" asks Bronze. "We're up at a higher altitude. It'll be cold and miserable up there."
"I'm cold and miserable in here."
"You're cold and miserable."
Dear Mew, why me?
I thrust the two squabbling Pokemon apart. "Are you both three? It doesn't matter. We're not going to freeze to death, it's late spring. If anything, it's cold in the cave, but it does offer a little extra protection. I'd say I'm leaving it up to you two, but with your incessant bickering it looks like I might as well ask the wild Pokemon for help."
"It's not my fault he's so possessive!" snaps Bronze, his fur flaring up stupendously. "I come back and you have another Pokemon sitting at the helm of the team, making decisions."
"He's not the helm of the team," I respond. "I am."
Bronze's ears flatten. I remember, without much fondness, the days by the Lake of Rage, when Bronze was still mourning Lilly. We've seen worse, sure, but knowing the two of us have changed and grown up in each other's absence is another kind of loss.
"I'm not here to take her away from you," Bronze explains. Because she was always mine.
"I never owned her. She's the trainer. She's in charge of me." Reginae replies.
Bronze nods.
That night, we sleep outside, around Bronze's own fire. Most of us are exhausted from the hike, but he stays up late. I see him last sitting in an almost human position, hunched over in the last embers of the dying hearth.
***
We awake in the morning and I shiver, feeling a slight chill run down my spine. It's cold, but not cold as the cave. The real issue here is the wind, which gusts every so often and is only blocked in part by the vegetative barricade Reginae set up around us last night. Bronze is asleep in the hearth, his dark form speckled with soot and ash, and the others are clustered around the backpacks, passing out rations.
"Eat up," I say. "Nothing too fatty, nor sugary, but besides that knock yourself out. Today's our last travel day."
"Wait. The last? As in, we'll fight him today?" Carter asks.
"We might." I say.
There's a burst of concerned chatter, chiefly from the old team, and I try to distance myself from the wave of fear that shakes its way through our golden spiderweb of bonds.
Anticipation has long passed into a dull sense of ominous foreboding for my new team, who were born ready for this, but many of the old team members haven't been in a combat situation during their time as Pokemon, save for the few brawls we've had with wild Pokemon.
Gym battles used to be the biggest cause of team deaths, and this is that cranked up to one hundred. Now that they're back in danger, they have every reason to be scared.
My Pokemon rise, one by one, with the sun glinting off their backs. They look to me, resolute in spite of the sea of turmoil swelling beneath the surface, and we enter the final chamber of the cave together.
Our ultimate challenge goes up in a staggering spiral, ascending upward for what seems like forever. The path is imperfect, crooked, and covered in stones and impediments, and the entire chamber is cold, like Suicune's Blizzard. It pierces all the way to the bone, and I feel small and desolate.
Worse are the markings on the wall. No one has come here in a long time, and there's not a single Pokemon who'd dare make their home in it. There's blood splashed across the walls in some places and I catch a decaying hand trapped under a rock. A dilapidated Poke Ball falls not far away, gathering dust.
Some of the heroes we sent to challenge Red tried to run when it became evident they wouldn't win this battle, Suicune informs me. Red does not take kindly to those who try to flee his games.
Lilly gasps from the back. Electricity sparkles from her head and tail gem. I follow her gaze all the way to the top, where a dark, hulking silhouette blocks out the light of the exit. One of Red's last team members roars, which makes the bones of the hand on the floor clatter. All my Pokemon are staring upwards now.
The Blastoise jumps down and lands at the bottom, unhurt. Its cannons burst with water, every impact either smashing in boulders or ricocheting off the walls and spraying us all with torrents of sickly rain.
"Lilly, Reginae, go!" I yell, glad to have two type advantages over the behemoth. Reginae and Lilly begin firing at will, lightning and petals firing through the air and scoring hits again and again across the Blastoise's massive chest, just as we've planned for the final battle (if Red dares use his team again). The Blastoise, while fazed by the constant barrage, keeps stepping forwards. Its twin cannons fire move independently, picking out my weakest links and shooting as hard as possible. My whole team goes active, skirting around the attacks. My aerial Pokemon jump up, hoping to distract the opponent, but with one cannon the Blastoise shoots four rapid-fire blasts. Ten wheels out of the way, and Khrys and Aerie manage a hasty dodge, but Sky's hardly even awake.
"Sky, get down!" I yell, flashing to her, but a torrent of noise fills my head and she pushes me away with ferocity I didn't even know she had. I can't make out the words, but the pulse of memories and noise is so awful that I clench my teeth back in my own body, withdrawing back into myself. She throws me for such a loop that I physically fall back, which the Blastoise notices. It turns its cannons from her to my shivering human form, but Reginae has other plans.
His petals pick up, thick enough to form a full screen around me, and Lilly rolls in and ducks out of the way with me in her arms. When we emerge on the other side, the Blastoise is defeated, retreating into its shell to escape from the thousands of petals, and Reginae finishes it by summoning a Frenzy Plant that lifts it straight into the air before slamming it down.
"Good job," says Bronze.
Reginae smiles. "You too. Ashley?"
I'm not watching him. Sky overs on the edge of my vision, curled in the corner, still panicking. "Go on ahead real quick." I say as Lilly lets me go.
What happened to 'no 'mon left behind'? asks Aerie.
"Are you okay? Both of you?" chimes in Lilly, ears tilted all the way forwards and tail quivering with concern.
"Go on," I say, a little more forcefully. "I'll be right there."
Khrys, whose fangs slide into a fearful frown, asks, "Please, Ashley, be reasonable-"
I give him a cold glance, because I know it's the only way I'll get him to leave. "Khrys, I'm doing this for your own good. Get out of here."
The Crobat's ears droop back as she shrivels up into the corner at my approach. Her fangs are angled downwards with regret. I've always seen her as maternal, but right now she looks like a scared kid waiting to be punished. She opens her mouth, but no words come out. She gives a soft, shuddering sigh.
I sit down next to her. She's close to my height, even though she seems smaller right now and the way she's draping her wings against her sides shrinks her significantly. "I'm not mad." I say, honestly, though I still have a pounding headache. "You didn't wreck up the battle and no one was hurt. We're in the eleventh hour, though, and I need to know, before we get into a more dangerous combat situation... what's holding you back from flashing with me?"
"Ask Lilly."
"What does Lilly have to do with it?" I ask, keeping my voice low. I look up to see the Ampharos is leading the others up the slope of the cavern.
Sky sighs, hesitating, but decides she's gone too far and might as well finish the job. "She didn't tell you that Shauna was in love with her, did she?"
I... crap. "No." I say, but with immense difficulty, pull a straight face. "I don't see how this involves you."
"You didn't get the whole story from her. You didn't get any of our stories! Only Bronze came charging back for two years like he had nothing to lose, and Lilly swept the League and arranged nigh everything while running out in front of him. As for the rest of us, we all had mornings when we woke up and wanted to stay. There were times I forgot how much I loved the open air or times I had nightmares not about being trapped there forever but about going back and getting murdered by some other Pokemon." She's almost crying now, but she continues, "Khrys couldn't look at other Bug-types. It reminded him of what his body was like. A prison. A small, winged prison destined to die early and take whatever spirit's trapped inside of us down with it. I can't believe I made it this far, but I'm still fodder. Carter is still fodder. At least a third of us are fodder Pokemon. We don't make it onto League teams, or past the first few gyms, and the only thing of note we do is line gym entrances in hundreds, deep beneath the earth."
She rests her head on my shoulder, and I'm not sure which of us is crying. I feel tears running down my cheeks, bright and hot, and I know it's both of us. I hold myself close against her. "This is so much, but I'm glad you told me. Everything. I might not fully understand, but I can-"
Sky cuts me off. "It's not everything."
"What?"
"I have a child, Ashley." Sky bawls.
Good-bye, straight face. "What?!"
"She's with Morty. Her name's Stratus." Sky's still sniffling, "I don't want her to come into this world without a mother."
"You're not going to die." I assure her. "You didn't have to hide this from me, either. I don't know how you remembered me or even how I was all those years ago, but being a Trainer isn't about getting everyone to do what you want- or at least, it shouldn't be. I own you about as much as you own me. My job is different from yours."
Sky nods, but she's still reeling from panic.
"We end this today and we go back for your daughter. In many regards, you're way more mature than I am, so this is actually awkward on my part, but I want to be friends, Sky. " I tell her, extending a hand.
She places her wing in it. "I'm s-sorry."
We join the others about halfway up, and Khrys flitters back to Sky and hugs her. She presses into his embrace, warmth in her eyes, but I sense at the back of my mind the memories of a man with salt-and-pepper hair, a man she loved.
She will never hold him again. They will not raise their dark-haired daughter in a house in the suburbs of a major Kalosian city, and she will not grow up to be a Gym Leader or a pilot (like her father).
I'm sorry, too, I think.
"We chose to come back," Lilly says, coming back to my side. She places a hoof on my knee. "All of us."
"And you don't miss it?" I ask, wondering if she knows what Sky's given away about her time in Kalos.
"Some things," she replies vaguely, with a slight blush.
She doesn't.
The climb is extensive, but all the weariness of the past few days descends from us as we continue up the slopes of Mt. Silver's most hallowed trial. In its place is a quiet determination, born in fear and
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