Chapter 20. Tell Me I'm Not Going Crazy

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Maxim did turn up after all – despite Arina's effort to avoid this meeting. The young man was a depiction of remorse itself. Arina, on the other hand, held firmly to her position again and refused to make peace in any way.

"Do you even understand that you derailed both of our lives simply because we broke up? And you really think that after this I will just fly into your arms? What else am I to expect from you?" Arina was perplexed. "Are you feeling alright at all? You should be grateful that I supported this 'lost control of the car' of yours!"

"I really am grateful! Honestly! Believe me, it was a temporary clouding of reason!" Maxim assured her. "I just wanted to shake you up..."

"'Shake up'?! No, you really must be crazy! Shake up? Under a five-ton truck?!"

"I have no idea where it came from..." Maxim muttered.

"Perhaps if you'd been paying attention to the road, you would know... 'Shake up'..." Arina laughed nervously, "wow, that's quite a 'shake-up' indeed."

"I realized a lot after that... Really... Just think about it! Fate has given us another chance! Come on, baby..." He tried to take her hand.

"I'm not your 'baby'!" Arina pulled her hand out of his palm, but Maxim grabbed her wrist instead.

"Now, Risha... be reasonable..." he cooed.

"You're the one to talk about reason?! Let go of me!" Arina exclaimed desperately, but Maxim, though loosening his grip a little, did not let her go.

"Silly, what are you doing?" he spoke soothingly, even affectionately, but the girl shuddered. "We are adults, come on... Well, sure, what I did was wrong, but you can't cross out everything because of this? We were so good together, just remember!"

"We have already discussed this! I can, and that's exactly what I am doing! Let go already, you're hurting me!" Arina began pounding him with her free hand, and Maxim tried to grab hold of it too, but in the next moment they both froze: someone's hand squeezed Maxim's wrist with an iron grip.

"You were asked to let go..." Kirill said in a quiet reproachful voice, looking at Maxim intently.

Maxim silently glared at the newcomer for a moment, then suddenly let out a strangled growl, released Arina's hand and began massaging his wrist with a hiss – Kirill also let go of his hand that same moment.

Arina exhaled loudly, also rubbing her wrist.

"Maxim, just leave, please. I'm asking you for the last time, just go and stay away from me," she said.

Kirill retreated to the door and opened it invitingly.

"You know him?" Maxim asked, nodding over his shoulder.

"Yes, this is Kirill, he..." Arina didn't manage to finish as Maxim interrupted her.

"Ha, so, not so innocent yourself, huh?" The young man narrowed his eyes. "Although, I really thought you had a better taste," he added dismissively. "That a keepsake from the inmates?" He addressed this question to Kirill.

Kirill continued projecting equanimity as he held the door open.

"Watch your mouth!" Arina snapped. "For your information, unlike you, Kirill not only didn't leave me behind – he pulled me out then. And thanks to him I'm here at all!"

Maxim's facial expression changed: he remembered how someone helped him surface, literally pulled him up by the scruff of the neck, and then asked him, disoriented, spitting and inhaling convulsively, whether the other person was still under water. However, the stranger almost immediately dove in again, without waiting for an answer... And later Maxim did not have the courage to approach when he saw that the girl was lifeless, and they were taken to the hospital in different cars. So it was him...

He looked at Kirill again appraisingly, then came closer and suddenly extended his hand to him.

"Apologies. And thank you. For her, especially..."

Kirill's upper lip twitched lightly in a disgusted grimace, but he nodded and also extended his hand.

"I believe you were leaving?" he asked with exaggerated politeness, almost immediately breaking off the handshake. "I will not detain you any further."

He stepped aside, while Maxim looked at the exit, and then turned to Arina:

"I'll come see you again."

"Don't even think about it," the girl muttered. "I said everything."

"No, we haven't finished yet," Maxim cut off.

"We have! I do not wish to see you anymore. And if you don't calm down, I'll go to the police after all!"

Maxim's face darkened and he took a step towards her, but stumbled upon Kirill, who seemed to appear out of nowhere in his way. He stood with his arms crossed over his chest with such an expression on his face that Maxim, looking at him, only cussed briefly and wisely chose to leave the room.

As soon as the door closed behind Maxim, Arina leaned back on the pillow and pressed her palms to the face.

Kirill sighed as he lingered on the spot.

"Probably better for me to visit another time, too..." he drawled finally, running his hand through the hair at the back of his head.

"No..." Arina stopped him, lowering her hands. "No, don't go..."

Kirill looked around hesitantly, then took the nearest chair and sat down after all.

Arina looked at him silently for some time, unable to tear her gaze away.

Now, when he had her full attention, making her once more wonder at the astonishing likeness, she was again struck by the awfulness of the situation. Yes, he clearly was interested in her... Especially judging by what her mother had told her. And that was great, but... She still felt no joy at all. Rather, on the contrary – she was in a near-despair state. How would she tell him? Admit that she had seen him in a dream? In some sort of delirium? And that she was attracted to that non-existent image? Not exactly the best beginning of an acquaintance. That is, if he doesn't proclaim her a psychopath... Conceal it? Perhaps that would be the best solution but she was almost tearing apart from the inside... Once again tearing apart... but this time in a different way.

"This..." Kirill pointed to his scar awkwardly, misinterpreting her concerned gaze, "is not the 'inmates'.

"Oh, don't let his words get to you." Arina winced. How could she be so wrong about a person?

"I know what it looks like..." Kirill continued nonetheless, rubbing the scar idly. "It was two years ago, during a retrieval mission – I was working as part of the operational staff of the Federal Rescue Service – there was a construction collapse and I was hit with debris. Managed to keep the eye by miracle, but due to the injury the vision in this eye decreased severely, and I had to switch to less risky activity." Kirill fell silent for a moment and then added awkwardly: "Don't know why I'm explaining this..."

"K..." Arina stumbled, "Kirill, trust me, this doesn't worry me in the least at the moment..."

"Really?" Kirill's face brightened up a little.

Arina forced a smile. If only you knew...

They were silent for some time.

"So it was him driving that day..." finally Kirill clarified, although that was obvious.

"Yes..."

"'Lost control of the car...'" the young man drawled thoughtfully.

"He did..." The girl sighed wearily.

"Just as I thought." Kirill smiled bitterly while Arina averted her gaze, embarrassed. "Are you sure he is worth the indulgence? You almost died because of him..."

Arina could hardly keep her cool.

"What makes you say that? I never mentioned anything of the sort. Did my mother tell you?"

"I was there," Kirill said after a brief pause. "And, if I understood you correctly, you would hardly be warning him about the police, had this been a true accident..."

He did not mention that if he had been just a little closer, the car would have swept him off as well. But Arina already remembered that moment herself.

Back then it was unnaturally stretched, as if in slow motion. And she saw clear as day how the headlights of their car briefly illuminated someone's face with wide-open eyes. No, not 'someone's'. His. Kirill's. And she even managed to sigh with relief in the back of her mind that they did not hit him. And now she was almost terrified anew: trying to save them, she almost killed him.

"I see..." she murmured, recollecting herself with some effort. "Why didn't you tell the police?"

"It was pretty dark and everything happened really fast. I was not completely sure what exactly happened there and wanted to talk to you about it... But now everything is finally clear. Are you... really going to let him get away with it?"

"It's just not worth it... and besides, I don't have the strength to do it..."

"You don't need to do it all by yourself..."

"Still," Arina shook her head, "I'd need to provide testimony, make an application or whatever, visit court sessions possibly. Anyways... I don't want to... I just want him to leave me alone. I'm alive and relatively unharmed – at least I hope so." She chuckled bitterly. "I don't need anything from him and I see no point ruining his life out of mere spite. Even after all he did."

"It's not only about the revenge, but rather justice... But it's up to you," Kirill said, looking at the girl intently. "Let's hope that he'd learned his lesson at least."

"Sometimes the most desirable outcome is that you are left alone. If he doesn't, and keeps pestering me, I will consider it..." Arina muttered, flustered by his intent gaze.

"What about, if I may ask?" Kirill inquired. "It's not just about the accident, is it?"

"We... we broke up... before the accident. And he wouldn't let me be... I'm sorry, I don't want to talk about it..." Arina wrapped her arms around her shoulders.

"Of course, sorry." Kirill looked away awkwardly.

Arina seized the moment to cast a glance at Kirill, but her actions did not go unnoticed.

"Say..." he drawled cautiously. "The way you look sometimes... It seems to me like you've already seen me before? Am I right?"

"Well... during the accident... but if you hadn't reminded me..."

Kakashi shook his head.

"You know that's not what I'm talking about."

Arina averted her gaze again. What could she possibly say?

Suddenly, a thought occurred to her – what if this entire nonsense was prompted by that brief moment when she spotted him on the bridge? The brain is a fascinating and not entirely explored thing... That would explain a lot. Well, except for the fact that this 'dream' somehow managed to leave such distinctive void in her soul... but then again, the consequences of the accident... It will pass, it must pass...

"Seems like you may find it awkward to talk about this. Let me take the lead." Kirill suggested, noticing her hesitation. "Dreams." He looked at her with anticipation.

Arina snapped out of her contemplative state and gaped at him. A stunned expression appeared on her face. Finally, she began to slowly turn her head from side to side, as if unwilling to believe what she had just heard:

"No... You can't...'

"But I am right, yes?" He made a quick movement forward, as if he wanted to take her hands, but Arina leaned away agilely.

"No!" she exclaimed. As if she needed him, of all people, to confirm her madness, – now, when she had almost found a reasonable explanation for it...

Kirill, as if recollecting himself, raised his hands in a disarming gesture.

"But you also saw it, didn't you?" he persisted nonetheless. "A world inhabited, along with ordinary people, with ninjas, possessing special abilities?"

"How can you even...?" Panic replaced the expression on the girl's face.

Kirill leaned forward again, but this time did not attempt to touch her, instead redirecting his overflowing emotions into words:

"Because I had those dreams too," he said fervently. "And... I was looking for you. For years, I was."

"'Years'?" Arina's face now expressed genuine bewilderment.

"Yes... because all this time I saw you only in dreams... A settlement... a mountain range with carved images of the leaders – the Hokage... we were there... you and me... and you... were from 'another' world – from this world!"

Arina looked at him, still in shock, but then nodded – at first barely noticeable, then a bit more confidently.

Kirill smiled, but his smile faded quickly.

"Well... and when I pulled you out... I didn't even realize straight away that it was you... but when I did... damn... I was so..."

Panic almost overtook him again as he recalled the horror he felt when he suddenly recognized the lifeless face of the girl, whom he had been searching for so long, looking out for everywhere... And now he had finally found her. Found – only to lose her forever that same moment...

It took him great effort to calm down and act; his hands had never trembled so much, even in the most critical situations... How he prayed for the first time in his life, to all the gods at once – prayed that his actions wouldn't harm even more. And that she would hold on... That she would make it until the ambulance arrives... That she would make it to the hospital. That she would come back...

Arina looked at him, biting her lip.

"But now everything is alright," Kirill finally smiled again. "And I don't even have to feel like a complete idiot trying to explain to you why I suddenly became so interested in you..."

"But how can this be?" Arina almost whispered.

"I don't understand myself..." The young man shook his head. "I only know one thing: I have been having strange dreams for many years. As if I'm watching a movie, or rather – a series. And the main thing in them was you..."

"And I 'watched' this movie in one go, apparently," Arina chuckled nervously.

"Huh?"

"I experienced this while I was unconscious... There was nothing like this before the accident."

"And what episode are you on now?" Kirill asked jokingly.

"The last words were yours: 'Hold on, girl.'" Arina answered after a brief moment to think.

Kirill flinched, but Arina didn't notice, averting her gaze.

"But it was from some incomprehensible vision... And before that... we didn't part too well, to be honest... by Hiruzen's office... and I jumped... off a cliff..." Arina mumbled and looked at Kirill with embarrassment: it still felt strange discussing 'that' world so openly with him, and especially that act of hers that felt so absurd now. Really that could have only made sense in a dream...

Kirill, on the other hand, kept batting his eyelids in confusion.

"But... I said that 'in reality', when I pulled you to the surface... When I didn't even realize it was you..."

Arina rubbed her face wearily.

"I'm not sure I want to get into this... What it was – a dream, delirium, or some strange death... and why we, apparently, saw the same thing – at different times and under different circumstances... And now, found ourselves in such a situation... It seems more like some stupid joke..."

"But the 'joke' is that you know me, and I know you, even though we've never met. At least, not in this world," Kirill said earnestly.

"But you're not exactly the same..." Arina tilted her head slightly and squinted her eyes.

"You too," Kirill smiled. "I knew you with lavender-coloured hair, or rather closer to white, and golden eyes..."

"And you had silvery hair... and darker eyes... or, to be more precise, 'an eye' – because the left one..."

"The 'Sharingan'," yes.

"Shit," Arina pressed her hand to her mouth. "How is that possible? You... you can't be real... I don't believe it..."

"You can touch me and see for yourself – I am very real," Kirill smirked.

And Arina did reach out, while Kirill leaned a bit closer to make it more convenient for her. After a brief hesitation, the girl touched his cheek with the knuckles of her fingers, ran her hand a bit higher, and traced with her fingers across his forehead, shifting the hair covering his left eye, then gently touched the scar above the eye.

Kirill kept his gaze on her, as if enchanted by her actions. Finally, Arina, already more confidently, placed her palm on his cheek, and then Kirill covered her hand with his – gently, almost weightlessly. Then he slightly turned his head and closed his eyes, pressing his lips to her palm, making her flutter.

"This just can't be..." the girl moaned – for these sensations were so familiar. "I'm going crazy... Tell me I'm not going crazy?"

"You're not..." his breath gave the girl's palm a light burning sensation, "otherwise we are going crazy together... and you know, I actually wouldn't mind that for some reason..."

At that moment, Arina realized that she had truly come back. Regained a missing part of herself. The oppressive feeling disappeared; the anxiety, that only intensified when she first saw Kirill, was also gone. Everything finally fell into place.

Kirill opened his eyes again, turned his face towards her, and smiled gently. Then, still pressing her hand to his cheek, he leaned even closer.

"What are you doing?" Arina whispered when their lips were mere centimetres apart.

"I want to check something... But this time I guess there's no point asking you not to peek..." Kirill murmured through a playful smile.

And then he kissed her.

THE END


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