A giant boat shaped like a seahorse began to approach us manned by a rowing crew of Oompa Loompas with a drum banging. The boat stops, and the Oompa Loompas laugh.

"What's so funny?" Violet asked. 

"I think it's from all those doggone cocoa beans. Hey, by the way, did you guys know that chocolate contains a property that triggers the release of endorphins, which gives one the feelings of being in love!"

"You don't say..." Mrs. Beauregarde replied shooting Wonka with a flirtatious gaze. He shook it off and that's great cause I was about to get protective.

"Can't no weirder than that rash your chest." Violet said as she somewhat looked at me I bet noticing my chest.

"Why young lady, that is not a rash! It is a birthmark!!" I snapped.

Mr. Wonka then glanced me with a rather impressed expression. 

"All aboard!" He said

We climbed aboard. I've been mocked once before about my birthmark and it's so irritating.  

"Onward!"

The drums resume, and the boat sails off, towards a tunnel. Mr. Wonka spoons up some chocolate from the river with a ladle, which he passes to Charlie.

"Here, try some of this will do you good. You look starved to death."

Charlie tried it before passing it me. 

"It's great!" Said Charlie.

I agreed once I tried some myself.

"That's because it's mixed by waterfall. The waterfall is most important. It mixes the chocolate- churns it up, makes it light and frothy. And by the way, no other factory in the world-"

 "You already said that." Veruca interrupts.

Mr. Wonka tenses up, then releases after an awkward moment.

"You're all quite short, aren't you?"

"Well, yeah. We're children."

"Well, that's no excuse. I was never as short as you."

"Yes you were."

"Was not. You wanna know why? Because I distinctly remember putting a hat on top of my head. Look at your short little arms- you could never reach."

"Do you even remember what it was like being a kid?"

"Oh, boy, do I."

"Do I... Do I?"

I couldn't take it anymore with this conversation. I was about to go bananas! So I slammed on my headphones and pressed a button playing a couple of songs that fit my mood.

I kept the music going the whole way even as we approached a tunnel. It looked quiet and the ride became a little wild. A bit of chocolate splatted onto my face under my eye and chin. I wiped it off and tried singing along quietly to keep myself calm during this ride. 

"What are words for"

I sang

"When no one listens anymore
What are words for
When no one listens
What are words for
When no one listens
There's no use talking at all"

That song is one my top favorites!

The ride got a little calmer as we passed strange looking rooms labeled with all different types of creams, including hair cream.

The ride got wild again a moment later and I continued to sing as soft as possible.

"We're running with the shadows of the night
So baby, take my hand, you'll be alright
Surrender all your dreams to me tonight
They'll come true in the end"

I didn't notice but Charlie noticed as Mr. Wonka turned his eyes at me even though I wasn't listening as he did a little while ago on the first half of the ride. 

While the ride was still wild, I felt an earring come loose and as I tried to catch, it slipped out and I noticed it fall into the chocolate. "Oh no! Earring overboard!" I said to myself and it was too far and deep to reach. 

Then we all came to a stop as if another room was about to be shown. I took my headphones off and put away the cassette as everyone was climbing out. Funny enough, Mr. Wonka seemed to have looked interested in taking my hand while I climbed off. Butterflies were everywhere in my stomach but took it anyway. 

"That was some really nice singing, jelly bean." He said to me.

OMG! He heard me sing?

Just then something came to me that had me more embarrassed then ever.

I had the hiccups!!

We entered what was known as the Inventing Room. It looked like a mad scientist's candy laboratory.

"This is the most important room in the entire factory." Mr. Wonka announced.

"Now, everyone enjoy yourselves, but please, just don't touch anything, okay? Go on."

I walked for a couple of seconds but then suddenly slipped again making almost everything fall out of my handbag.

"Bullocks!" I said to myself.

I picked up everything as quick as I could and the hiccups continued. 

"Daddy, look at this! I want one of these!" Veruca was about to approach and touch my diary.

"NO!!!!!!" I snatched it back before it could be touched. "Nobody but me should touch my precious secrets!!!"

But just as placed it back in my purse as the last thing left, my phone started to ring. 

"Oh crap! What now?" I answered knowing it had to be Papa. I was right!

"Hello? Papa?"

"Anya, how's everything??"

"Um, very good, Papa! Right now I'm in the middle of the tour."

"Tour? Touring what?"

"Don't you remember? Charlie became the winner of the last Golden Ticket! We're touring Willy Wonka's factory."

"You're what? What might you be doing....."

"I thought I told you yesterday that I'm fully capable of taking care of myself!"

I wanted to hang up as soon as possible so I could get back to the tour! Plus, I scared to tell Papa that I was falling for the candy man himself.  He went on sounding melodramatic over my day.

"Papa, I'm telling you! I'm all good! I'm a full grown woman, so COOL IT!!!!"

I hung up and decided to shut my phone off just as I put it away! I remembered it was probably close to that time of the month. No wonder I felt so irritable and snappy at the moment. 

"Anya?" Mr. Wonka asked noticing him behind me. I turned around. 

"What's going on?"

"Uhhh-it's-----no ones business." I hiccuped again. 

"Ok! Ok, cupcake! Just checking." He replied as I notice him glance at my polished Big Apple red fingernails. 

"Hey, Mr. Wonka! What's this?" Violet asked in the distance.

"Oh! Let me show you!"

Everyone including me ran over to a strange looking contraption.

 "These are Everlasting Gobstoppers. They're for children who are given very little allowance money. You can suck on it all year, and it'll never get any smaller!"

"Like gum!" Violet commented.

"No, gum is for chewing. If you tried chewing a Gobstopper, you'd break all your little teeth off. But they sure do taste terrific."

"I believe we call those 'Jawbreakers' in America." I commented before I hiccuped again. 

We crossed to another machine. 

"Now this is hair toffee. You suck down one of these little boogers and in exactly half an hour, a fresh new crop of hair will start growing all over the top of your little noggin. With a moustache and a beard!"

"What's a beard?" asked Mike.

"Well, beatniks for one, folk singers and motorbike riders. Y'know. All those hip, jazzy, super cool, neat, keen, and groovy cats. It's in the fridge, daddy-o! Are you hip to the jive? Can you dig what I'm layin' down? I knew that you could. Slide me someskin, soul brother!"

Mike refused to return the high five Mr. Wonka offered. 

 "Unfortunately, the mixture isn't quite right yet. An Oompa Loompa tried it yesterday, and-"

An Oompa Loompa entered  with hair covering his entire body. He looked like "Cousin It" from "The Addams Family".

"How are you today?"

Two hands pop out from under the hair and give thumbs ups.

"You look great! Oooh- watch this!"

Mr. Wonka pulled a lever, and a machine goes through a process, before finally, anticlimactically, dispensing a stick of what must be chewing gum. Violet took it immediately.

"You mean that's it?" Mike asked.

"Do you even know what "it" is?"

 "It's gum." Violet replied.

"Yeah. It's a stick of the most amazing and sensational gum in the whole universe. Know why? Know why? Because this gum is a full three-course dinner all by itself!"

"Why would anyone want that?"

He pulls out a note of cards.

"It will be the end of all kitchens and all cooking. Just a little strip of Wonka's Magic Chewing Gum and that is all you will ever need at breakfast, lunch and dinner. This piece of gum happens to be tomato soup, roast beef and blueberry pie."

"Sounds great!" I commented.

"It sounds weird." Veruca replied.

"It sounds like my kind of gum!" Violet took out her piece of gum, sticks it behind her ear, and prepares to chew the new one.

"I'd rather you didn't. There are still a few things that we're-"

But Violet didn't listen!

 "I'm the world record holder in chewing gum. I'm not afraid of anything." She began to chew.

"How is it, honey?" Mrs. Beauregarde asked.

"It's amazing! Tomato soup- I can feel it running down my throat!"

"Yeah! Spit it out."

I could tell Mr. Wonka was trying to make a warning.

"Young lady, I think you'd better-" I tried to say.

"It's changing! Roast beef with baked potato! Crispy skin and butter!"

"Keep chewing, kiddo! My little girl's gonna be the first person in the world to have a chewing gum meal!"

"I'm just a little concerned about the-"

"Blueberry pie and ice cream!"

"Yeah. That part."

Then something strange started to happen.

"What's happening to her nose?"

"She's turning blue!"

"Your whole nose has gone purple!"

"What do you mean?"

"Violet, you're turning violet! What's happening?"

"Well, I told you I hadn't got it right, because it goes a little funny when it gets to the dessert. It's the blueberry pie that does it. I'm terribly sorry."

Mr. Wonka seemed uncomfortable while yet somewhat fascinated. He steps back and holds onto my shoulders as Violet continued turning blue all over.

"Mother, what's happening to me?"

Just then, she started to inflate.

"Good gracious! She's swelling up!" I said.

"Like a blueberry!" Charlie finished. 

Mrs. Beauregarde watched into horror as Violet had transformed into a gargantuan blueberry.

 "I've tried it on twenty Oompa Loompas and each one ended up as a blueberry. It's just weird!"

"But I can't have a blueberry as a daughter. How is she supposed to compete?"

"You could put her in a county fair." Veruca commented.

Right after that chaos, I noticed something. I think that cured my hiccups!

The Oompa Loompas entered again,  dancing and chanting, for what looked like another song. This time it's a hip-hop funk parody. They dance with imitation hipness, like disco dancers meet wiggers. It was all rather strange!

"I want you to roll Miss Beauregarde into the boat and take her along to the juicing room at once."

The Oompa Loompa bows.

"The juicing room? What are they going to do to her there?" Asked Mrs. Beauregarde.

"Squeeze her like a little pimple! We've got to squeeze all that juice out of her immediately."

I chuckled!

"Mother please, help me!" Violet called as her mom ran to join her. 

 "Come on, let's boogie! Without the boat, we'll have to move double time. There's far too much to see."