centi... it's me, (name).. I hope you're okay in there... I miss you.. I miss you a lot.

...can you hear me in there? "Baaaaur..?" you droned sadly, pressing your nose gently against a small pink bubble, containing your dear friend's spherical gem. your heart ached for her. she never deserved a fate like that... you couldn't help but feel as if it was your fault. why would I let this happen?? you huffed, shaking your head. as much as you wanted to release her from the bubble, you weren't in the mood to deal with that uptight pearl's rebuking. oh no, instead, you must do what Steven said to; wait. with a whimper, you let go of your dear friend, numbly watching as the bubble descended upwards, meeting with the bag of chips that was also bubbled. how long will it be...? you stood there for a few moments, staring solemnly up at the bubbled chip bag and gem, as if you were making sure they were fine where they were. after which you sigh and turn to exit the lava room. I hope you haven't forgotten me...

after a bit of climbing, you make your way out, head hanging low, gaze casted to the ground. you hear the doors open before you and you numbly re-enter the living room, staring at your paws before sitting back on your haunches in a slump.

stars above... was I always this... lonely..?

it had only been a few weeks since centi had been poofed, and you already felt like you were nothing but sand.

now, the gems themselves were nice company, you couldn't complain, but centi was pretty much the only being to actually hang out with you. steven, bless the dear boy, was the kindest of the gems, was always out on missions.

garnet was... well, she wasn't cruel to you. in fact, she was rather kind to you. she'd pet your head, itch you behind your horns and stroke your withers, but other then that, she was rather distant and quiet. she was mostly in the temple or like steven; out on missions.

now, amethyst, she was fun. she was so carefree and spunky. she was always friendly towards you. she had you in her messy room, to either mess it up more, ride around on your back while you jumped into puddles and rammed into things or just wrestle you. of course pearl was quick rebuke such interactions, claiming it might, 'nurture' your 'monstrous side' and reawaken your beastly tendencies.

speaking of pearl... she really didn't fancy you too much. she normally regarded you with distrust and treated you like an absentminded animal, scolding you more times than you thought was possible, telling you what not to touch or do and overall making it seem like you didn't have good if not ANY form of sentience. however, when you did something that pleased her, she would give you a small bit of praise and maybe even a pat on the head... and while that warmed you up inside a little, it still felt a bit.. off. regardless, you couldn't really be angry at her. she might be cold towards you, but it wasn't really in disdain, it was more uncertainty. and that... you could live with that... it would be better if she regarded you like a fellow gem instead of a witless beast though..

lion... well, he spent his time sleeping and doing his own things. if you did interact, he'd just yawn and want you to pet him and wrestle you slightly before doing his own task. he was a good snuggler, though.

point is, you were still quite bored and... honestly lonely.

you just stood in the living room staring at the ground for a few minutes before you lifted your gaze to the beautiful portrait woman. she looked like she would be excellent company. you stared at her longer. ...I wonder what motivated you to create this team..? you narrowed your eyes and trotted over to it, staring pensively at it. the more you stared... the sadder you got. miss quartz...

without thinking twice, you rear up and carefully pluck it off the wall, now holding it tenderly in all four arms.

mmmm... you tilted it slightly so the multiple shades of pink can catch the light. such warmth radiated from the simple portrait. and the fact steven never really met her... really stung. you press your muzzle into the portrait's, a sad drone emanating from your throat. I wish I could have met you as well... you thought somberly.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!!?"

almost immediately, your mane fluffs out in alarm and your eyes bug out as the familiar bellowing voice rang out in the room, echoing in your head. uh oh... you spun around to see pearl, looking quite furious marching towards you. "WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT TOUCHING THIS PORTRAIT!!?" you shrank back, tail between your legs, shocked at how angry she sounded. of all the scoldings you've received from her, she sounded particularly angry here. "you may be able to draw her in... whatever little projections you can imagine, but you will KEEP your brutish paws OFF this portrait!" she snatched the portrait from your grip, and you instinctively hug yourself, shaking. "Is that CLEAR!?" your mouth opened, like you'd answer, but no sounds came out.

"Pearl, Settle down!" pearl spun around to the other gems as they stepped off the warp pad and rush over to you both. "garnet, you don't understand," pearl started, still caught up in the heat of your most recent disobedience. "I've told this thing MULTIPLE times to stay away from this! and everytime I look, it's constantly going near it and touching it!" garnet stepped forward, taking the portrait from her. "Yo, P! chill out, it's just a painting!" amethyst raised her hands defensively, and pearl scoffed. "It's not even about the painting anymore, amethyst! it's a lot of other things as well!" she sneers at you, distrust in her frosty glare. "I've also caught her sneak to the heart of the temple multiple times, no matter how many times I've said not to!" her eyes narrow. "it could be planning something for all we know!" amethyst scoffed skeptically. "dude, you're overreacting..." pearl growled, and waved her arms angrily. "I'M NOT OVERREACTING!!"

while the gems carried on with their banter, you had slowly crawled over to that flat blue pad of sorts near the temple, curling in on yourself as the stinging words seemed to repeat themselves in both the argument and your head.

things like...

It.

brutish.

BEASTLY.

M O N S T R O U S .

is that all I am to them...?

an it?

a brute?

a monster?

you clasped your hands over your head as the shameful sting of tears settled in your eyes.

why... why am I even here then?

why can't I just... disappear?

somewhere no one can see me?

a place where I can't cause any form of turmoil?

a place... far away from here..?

you found yourself visualizing a place.

somewhere you could do no harm.

someplace.. no one will ever see you.

"YOU GET OFF OF THAT THIS INSTANT!"

as pearl stormed towards you, a bright flash of blue suddenly engulfed you, and before you even knew what was going on, you were swept into a bright blue tube of light.
~~~~~

you roared in confusion as you were thrown through the bright blue tube at an unknown amount of speed, until you felt yourself hit a hard surface. dazed and dizzy, you staggered slightly, only for you to fall down a steep, painful slope, landing with a THUMP at the dusty bottom.

in too much pain and despair to try and get up or even figure out what had happened, you merely laid there sobbing.