Colby's POV

It felt like a kick in the gut hearing Julia say the things she was saying.

She genuinely didn't think I cared about her. She thought that I actually wanted nothing to do with her.

She didn't know how hard it was for me.

Leaving Julia was the hardest but most crucial decision I have ever had to make.

I loved her long after I left her. Hell, I still had love for her in my heart.

I wouldn't have went to find her yesterday if I didn't.

I was fully aware that what happened yesterday was a trap. I knew they wanted me to come and find Julia.

I knew I was falling into the trap but it was necessary.

When we got to base I looked over at Julia. "You're going to sit in my office while I meet with the guys." I said as she rolled her eyes.

"Just like old times except this time I may be more likely to snoop." She said and got out of the car.

"Don't fucking snoop, Julia. If you know what's good for you then you won't." I said as she walked up to me, getting in my face.

"What are you gonna do? Kill me?" She said quietly, staring into my eyes. I clenched my jaw then put my hand on her neck, squeezing it so much that she couldn't breathe at all.

I kept my eyes locked on hers as she kept the same deadly stare.

It only took a couple seconds though before her eyes were widening with panic from the lack of air in her lungs.

I kept my same intensity, watching as she tried to pull away from me.

It wasn't until she was about to pass out that I let go.

"Dick." Julia whispered as she tried to catch her breath. "Don't go through my shit." I said then turned to lead the way downstairs.

Julia was still struggling to breathe, but I meant what I said.

If she knew what was good for her she wouldn't go through the things in my office.

I knew she was a smart girl who was a little more rough around the edges after getting involved in the crime world.

I had to remember that she had a few bodies on her body count. Although, after seeing her reaction to the gunshot that killed a guy yesterday, I would assume her fear of guns was worse than ever.

I saw the panic flooding every inch of her body the second I shot that gun.

If I wasn't holding onto her I didn't know what she would have done.

"Stay in here. Don't move." I said and opened my office door. "Yes, master." Julia said condescendingly.

"Little shit." I grumbled as I closed the door, locking her in there.

Once she was in there I went to the conference room where everyone was waiting.

They all greeted me with looks of intimidation on their faces. I had to admit I really liked how powerful they made me feel.

"We've got a situation and I'm sure you've heard about it." I said and paced in front of them. "The guy we are looking for is still on the loose but he's now after us." I said and stopped, looking at them.

"He wants me dead." I said blandly. "This isn't a new thing, but we can't have any risks. We need to stay proactive and make sure everything is locked down." I explained.

"Jobs will be limited until this blows over." I said and glared at all of them intensely.

"There's a girl here and she will be here for a while. Don't speak to her or even look at her. Ignore her entirely if you know what's good for you." I said with as much venom as possible.

The last thing I needed was anyone fucking with Julia while she was here.

"You will check in and out of this building with Will or myself. Are we understood?" I asked as everyone nodded.

"Questions?" I asked and raised my brow. "What does this guy want to do with us?" Patrick asked as I hummed.

"The same thing everyone wants from us. To know the secrets and to infiltrate." I said then crossed my arms.

"Nothing is different except for how notoriously dangerous this guy is. He seems like a coward though because he's hiding but we'll see." I said then looked around.

"No more questions?" I asked with a bored tone. "Great." I said after a moment of silence then turned and left.

I needed to get some work done, then I needed to go with Julia to get her some stuff.

I felt kinda bad for ripping her away from her home and all of her stuff, but this was the only option we had.

I couldn't help but feel bad that I was essentially forcing her back into my life after pushing her out.

When I got back to my office I saw Julia sitting there, looking down at her hands.

She looked sickeningly pale and her breathing was erratic.

"Julia?" I asked, but she didn't look up. "What's going on?" I asked and closed the door walking over to her.

When I did this she looked at me with a panicked expression.

"Hey...just breathe." I said and brushed her hair out of her face, trying to help with the claustrophobic feeling.

"I-it w-w-won't sto-p-p." She whimpered as I shook my head.

"Let's just lay you down." I said and helped her stand. When I did this her eyes started to roll back, but she was still conscious.

I laid her down then sat down and rested her head in my lap.

Julia gasped as she started to seize up, her eyes wide with fear.

"Just let it happen, Jules. You're gonna be okay." I instructed. After a few seconds she was violently thrashing.

Her seizures were much more intense than I remembered. They honestly made me really nervous.

Was I stressing her out so much that they were getting this bad?

I needed to cut back on how harsh I was being.

"Come on, Jules. Come back." I whispered as the seizure continued. I was getting concerned at how long it was getting but I tried to keep her from getting injured.

After what felt like forever she stopped seizing but she didn't open her eyes.

"Wake up." I mumbled and rubbed her back. It took a couple seconds but she eventually opened her eyes.

I let out a sigh of relief as she looked around in a panic.

"Relax, Julia. You're alright." I said as she whimpered slightly, looking up at me.

"I'm gonna get you your medication. I'm sorry I didn't let you grab it." I said as she shook her head.

"I haven't been taking it for months." She whispered as my heart sank. "Why? You know you need it." I said as she closed her eyes.

"Can't afford it." She said then slowly sat up. "Did I not leave you enough money?" I asked as she clenched her jaw, tears flooding her eyes.

"I'm not a fucking charity case. I barely even touched your money." She snapped. I breathed out a laugh, shaking my head.

"I should have known better." I said then stood up and went to sit at my desk. "Does Adam know about your medication?" I asked and went on my computer.

"No." Julia mumbled and put her head in her hands. I could tell she really wasn't feeling well at all and I didn't blame her considering the severity of the seizure she just had.

"Great." I said then went to go order it for her. "What pharmacy was yours?" I asked and looked over at her.

"I don't want your help." She said as I sighed. "It's not negotiable."  I said and looked back at the computer.

"You just love controlling me." She said with an almost sad tone.

"You force me to be with you, then you force me away, now you want to force me to be with you again?" She asked and looked down.

"I'm not the twenty year old you took all those years ago." She said, her voice cracking. "You can't force me to do things anymore." She said and looked up at me, tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do about it." I said with regret in my voice.

It was hard to see her like this. Everything she said was true but she didn't understand the severity of the situation.

She didn't understand that I let her go because I had to. Things were going to get worse if I stayed with her.

Everyone knew that if they fucked with her they would get to me.

When I left her I had to do a lot of damage control, telling everyone that she was dead.

Clearly that story didn't work very well. Since we were back at square one, having someone out to get Julia to get to me.

Maybe I was feeding into it by protecting her but it was the only type of control I had in this situation.

I understood that this wasn't fair for her, but it had to happen.