stumbled forward, wasting no time before he swung his katana around. My eyes widened, trying to jump back before his blade sliced through my stomach. I grimaced, pain seeping through the wound before it healed in mere seconds and I threw another punch.

My mind was clouded. I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't hold myself back.

I couldn't stop.

Help me.

My first landed right in his face. I struck again. His side. Again. His stomach. Again. His neck.

The demon fell back, though before I could land another hit, he was already swinging at me. The demon swung down, the tip of the blade scratching my cheek. I stumbled back, losing my balance and falling to the ground.

The demon wasted no time at all, stabbing me through my shoulder and pinning me to the ground. I looked up at him, my eyes flashing with remembrance as I watched his eyes glow just like how the upper moon one did on the day mother died. On the day everyone's soul became lost.

I couldn't even react, not even as blood slipped past my lips and cascaded down my form to mix with the rubble around me. My eyes were wide, bloodshot and filled with pain as crimson cascaded down from the wound and all I could do was stare up at the demon who only watched as I coughed out a splutter of blood, which landed on his cheek.

My body shook, my hands moving to grip the blade with my bare palms as my body jolted every now and then. All I did was glare up at him, my pupils trembling, my breaths coming out as forced, my body refusing to stay still, even as the skin around the blade strung itself back together just like it was before, even though the blade prevented most of the healing.

I gritted my teeth, attempting to move under the blade, though the demon simply twisted the katana, creating a distinct, gruesome quelching tune as more and more blood slipped from the wound. I could only gasp, my body flailing around as I gripped the blade, trying anything to stop it from being twisted in my body, but alas, there was nothing I could do, he was too strong.

"This is the difference between the two of us, (Y/N)." He sighed, bending down to grip my hair and lift my face up to meet his own. "I can kill you, so easily it's funny. But you.." The man paused, chuckling to himself as I struggled in his grip. "You couldn't kill me if you tried."

My teeth grit, and before he could react I moved to grip his neck, and threw him to the side. With a hiss, I pushed myself to lean forward, where the blade pierced through my flesh to the point that there was a large gash within my shoulder. I stumbled to my feet, as did the demon, though he was shaky. His stance was off.

I mindlessly caught on.

I shook my head, the wound on my shoulder healing within seconds, now standing protectively in front of the blade. "No..." I gritted out, wiping the side of my mouth from the blood. "I can't kill Isamu..." I paused, huffing out as my chest heaved in pain, pupils thinned just like his. "But I will kill the demon in front of me, who has just left himself open."

The demon's eyes widened, realising his stance was off and his blade stabbed into the ground behind me. He attempted to move away, to run away, anything, but it was too late. He had let his guard down.

I appeared behind him, arm reeled back as I watched him turn to meet my gaze over his shoulder.

With no thought, no remorse, my planked palm struck through his neck, slicing it clean off until my hand exited through the flesh and blood was thrown across the floor.

I landed on my feet, crochet slightly before I shook my head, my eyes clenched shut, and when I reopened them, they were no longer thinned, but instead, back to normal. Back to the way they had been for the last 70 years.

I paused, and all of a sudden, the bloodlust in my mind had ceased and the humanity inside me had returned, still unaware of the bloody scene behind me.

From what I could tell, the moment I took his blood, it caused a reaction, creating the same amount of bloodlust he held, but this time, it was within me. It was as though all thoughts had been blanked out and my mind had wandered into a soft slumber as my body attacked and moved on its own.

I blinked, turning around, only for my eyes to widen and my breath to halt, and I slowly looked down to my hands, silently praying they were not stained with crimson, however I was met with terror as I watched the blood slither down the tips of my fingers until it puddled with his remains. "huh..."

I slowly reached out, hand flinching slightly and my breaths stuttered as I reached for his decapitated head, which had been turned away from me. I wanted to see his bright eyes, just like from when we were children. I prayed to see his bright smile which brought a smile to my face each time he exposed his teeth. I needed to see the light in his face.

But I was met with none.

I picked up his head, my palm balancing it in my hand as my eyes traced around his face, so lifeless, so dull. The light in his eyes was clouded over by a crystalline glass, almost like it could shatter. His cold skin matched the snow of the mountains we once lived on.

His face was lifeless in my hands.

I didn't know what to do. Should I be crying? Should I be screaming at my own actions? Should I be begging to the gods above and begging for them to forgive me?

I simply moved my free hand to trace around his face, tears unknowingly slipping down my cheeks as I mumbled to myself breathlessly. "Isamu..?"

Please help me.

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

His arm rose overhead, his grin as wide as ever as it's brightness blasted past the sun and made even the darkest of nights bearable and as bright as day. His shimmering pupils, as warm as a soft summer morning, shone with determination and kindness as our eyes linked and all of a sudden the light in his eyes shifted and his grin somehow widened.

Kyojuro Rengoku was leaving for a mission subjected to him by Kagaya only a few moments ago, and in his final moments on the premises he had turned to grin at me as if it were the last grin he could ever muster, as if he was leaving me for good, just like everyone else.

Although, I knew that would never happen. We made a promise, after all.

His cape was swept with the breeze, the flaming patterns laying on the end almost seeming as though they were real, as though you could touch them, feel their warmth emit from their soft rhythm of dance, hear the crackling and watch the soft embers fall into the sky and fly away until they were nothing but dust left.

I was snapped out of my small daze as the man cried out over my impossibly loud thoughts. "I promise to make sure to bring you back something! Take care of yourself while I'm gone!" He gave out a hefty laugh from his chest.

I simply stood and watched, my eyes widening slightly before I nodded and raised my palm modestly to give a small wave back. I watched his eyes sparkle down the path before he gave one final nod and lowered his arm from above his head and turned away, soon leaving nothing more than his memory.

I looked to my left, looking down slightly at Kagaya, who kneeled on the ground, his children either side of him as his eyes wandered into the abyss of the gardens, almost as if he could see clearer than any of us. "You're not going to wish him luck?" The man inquired.

The grip around my spear tightened almost accidentally before I removed my gaze from him and to where Kyojuro stood only moments ago. "Why should I need to do that? He has the ability to make his own luck." I paused, looking down and my voice wavering slightly. "..I wouldn't doubt him for a moment."

The man hummed. "You sound pretty uncertain about that." His hand slowly moved away from his own body and instead it reached out towards me. I wasted little to no time, moving in front of him and kneeling before his frame, where I lay my palm in his. "Would you mind telling me why?" His palm slithered around my own before snaking it's way up my arm, around my shoulder, following the pattern of my neck before finally trailing up to my cheek, where it lay still for a few moments.

I placed my hands to my lap and gave out a small sigh, my eyes gently closing.

I didn't doubt him. I didn't doubt anyone in the corps because I know the potential everyone can reach if put in the correct situation, so why did I feel a pit of dread clawing up my stomach, scratching and dragging it's claws through my throat until I was left to suffocate silently? Why did it feel as though the pit in my stomach grew and the depths of my mind began to wonder to places it shouldn't go.

Doubting my comrades.

Feeling unsafe in the one place I would call home.

Understanding nothing as if I were a mere child...

Why...?

"(Y/N)?" Ubuyashiki called out, his voice snapping me out of my daze. My eyes reopened, only to stare down at my lap. "What's wrong?" He sighed, his thumb rubbing my cheek affectionately as his other palm slowly reached towards me until it landed on my shoulder. "I hear you haven't been sleeping. Why?"

It took a moment for me to respond. It wasn't as though I didn't trust this man, not at all. In fact, he was one of the only people I could ever think of trusting, and yet, I was still hesitant. Why was I hesitant?

Oh, right.

It was because I felt weak, pathetic. Dreams have been plaguing my mind, and my performance is showing results that they are slowly eating away at my brain until I am left useless. Dreams of my family, my friends, my enemies...everything is slowly coming back bit by bit and I had no idea why.

I tried to avoid sleeping to get away from them, but it seemed as though I couldn't escape it no matter how hard I tried. Whenever someone did a simple action it felt as though I knew someone who did the exact same thing all those years ago... But I knew that wasn't true.

"I..." I sighed, eyes closing once more as I savoured the warmth from Kagaya. "Ever since that boy and the demon arrived...I just-" I paused and he sat silently, awaiting my words. "I've been remembering things I shouldn't..." I finished, lips pursing as I awaited his response keenly.

For every moment he hadn't answered, it felt like a few hundred years had passed. Was he disappointed in me? Did he feel as though I wasn't ready for any job he has set me recently? Was he mad-

"I see. I am very sorry this is happening to you." I froze, eyes snapping open to stare into his dull ones in shock. "You could've told me earlier, you know that, right?"

I paused, looking away from him because all of a sudden it was as though eh was looking right through me. "Well, I-"

"Or you didn't tell me because the last time you had many issues it was with demons." I blinked. He was staring into me like a fresh, clean window. "That must've been difficult, I bet." The man sighed and said nothing more before using what was left of his strength to pull me into his chest. The palm that held my cheek was now cupped around the back of my skull and the hand that lay on my shoulder has slithered around my back, gently keeping me in his soothing embrace.

It was warm, just like Rengoku's smile..

I gripped his garments, my body now tense as my teeth grit. I was being weak. I was showing too much weakness. I couldn't do that, not even here, so why am I letting this happen so easily. Without the need for persuasion...

I could pull out of his embrace any moment I wanted, and yet my body refused to move. It was stuck in place as if it was begging to never leave, as if it was held in place by a thousand soldiers crawling and crying to keep me in place to ensure their own safety on the battlefield? It was as though I was the enemy, their main priority to take down, and so, in a desperate final attempt they reached to hold me down after the climax of the fight.

"Why?" I inquired, eyes softening and teeth unclenching, though the grip I held on the man's garments never faltered. The man hummed, head tilted as his palm began to stroke through my locks. "Why are you being so kind to me?- to everyone?" I heard the birds hum a sweet melody over my words, and yet I continued, even though it felt like the world wanted me to finally experience peace. "What have we done to deserve this? I've killed people. People I don't know, my family, my friends...so why do you treat me like an equal?"

"Our past doesn't represent who we are today. Especially if you've taken that step to change." I flinched when his fingers focused on twirling a lock one by one, swirling it in between his fingers, just like that upper moon three did on that fateful day. I dug my face further into his chest. "You have taken more than a step. You've taken a leap, and therefore are willing to beat your past and the evil around us. Why wouldn't I treat you like an equal? Just because I was born with a high status means nothing." He slowly lowered his head until his eyebrows lay on top of my head. "At the end of the day, we are all people...halfing or not."

I only stayed silent in his soft embrace that felt like the warm summer day in the gardens. The scent of the flowers and wet grass nearby the pond, the music of the water fountain nearby, the harmony of the birds, the warmth that spilled onto your skin through the branches and leaves above until it lit up your eyes like a thousand stars.

Yeah...that was how I would describe it perfectly...

I sighed, finally relaxing in his embrace and the winds soft words spoke through the gardens ahead.

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

"Oh, hey (Y/N)-san!" The burgundy haired lad cried out, his smile just as wide as Rengoku's, though it lacked the energy, and instead it held an element of kindness.

My steps echoed through the building of the butterfly estate, thudding one after another until I stopped right in front of the boy and glared down at him harshly, sending a physical shiver through him and causing his smile to quickly drop into a frown of panic, though they kindness and curiosity in his eyes never left.

"Tanjiro-san." I called, and the boy straightened up like a soldier, a bead of sweat running down the side of his face. "You're going on a mission with Rengoku-kun soon, right?" I inquired, brows furrowing at the boy in question.

"Yes ma'am!"

"What?"

"I mean, yes (Y/N)-san!"

I gave a silent sigh, eyes softening, realising I probably seemed like the devil to the boy, especially after our last confrontation.

It had been almost a day after what happened with Kagaya, and honestly, I had never gotten better sleep than I did last night. I knew that Amane would check on me every now and then through the night, but she was silent, at least, to me. My mind was filanny put to rest minus the small breakthroughs of small memories, though, they were happy ones.

My mother, my friends, my first meeting with Kagaya.

It was all just right.

"If you'd like, I could help you train-"

"(Y/N)-Sama!" A voice cried out through the halls, interrupting my conversation. I paused, turning over my shoulder to watch as a kakushi skidded down the halls, what seemed to be a bento box under his arm, and his eyes filled with exhaustion.

He ran down the hall, skidding to a stop only moments before running into me and falling to his hands and knees on the floor as he painted out a sigh. Tanjiro looked over my shoulder. "Huh?" The boy inquired, tilting his head questionably.

I blinked, looking down at the man with furrowed brows. "What's wrong?" I was about to place my hand on the man's shoulder, crouching beside him, but he quickly stood to his feet and bowed respectfully while holding the box of bento in front of my face. I blinked.

"To (Y/N)-Sama, from the flame hashira, Kyojuro Rengoku!" The man cried out, and I felt a bead of sweat run down the side of my face as I released a small hum in question. "On his recent mission, the flame hashira brought this for you and requested it was given to you as soon as possible!" He cried out, rather loudly considering we were in a place filled with injured people and Shinobu..

I blinked, remembering the words Rengoku cried before he left to go on his mission. 'I'll make sure to bring you back something!'. I looked down at the box and hummed, tilting my head at the gentle designs of the box. A soft, calm wood which was delicate to even look at, the small line that showed the box could be opened, and most of all, the incredible smell that radiated from the contents.

I'd be lying if I said it didn't seem appealing.

I slowly reached to take the box from his hands and as soon as I didn't, the man stood to his full height and turned to run back down the hall, most certainly busy with other tasks around the Demon Slayer HQ.

I looked down at the box once again, my fingers gently tracing the patterns of the box as though it were a souvenir. It felt..nice to receive something from that man. He never failed to come back with gifts for me, however this felt different, especially since it wasn't directly from him. I wasn't about to complain, of course, but...

Something felt wrong...so, so wrong.

Tanjiro noticed my fixation on the box and poked his head over my shoulder to get a better look at the box, where he smiled. "That was very nice of him to do that, don't you think?" I blinked out of my daze, sighing before nodding.

"It is. I'll have to thank him later." I turned to face the boy once again before getting back to my original point at hand. "However, I was wondering, before I got interrupted, if you'd like to train? Your friends are welcome to join as well, if they'd like?"

Now that my mind was somewhat cleared of its disturbing thoughts, I knew I had to continue with my new mission, to take care of the boy. I had to keep him safe, train him, make sure he survived, and for that to happen, I need to at least get along with him. So, I figured it would only make sense to help him train for his upcoming mission tomorrow.

And yes, I did ask Rengoku for his advice, and now I'm following it.

His eyes brightened, about to say yes, however, something in his mind stopped him from doing so, and he instead looked to the floor, scratching the back of his head. "Don't get me wrong, i'd love to do it, it's just...Aoi-san told us all to not do anything the day before the mission since it's likely we won't be in the right state of mind or our bodies would have some fatigue, making it more difficult to fight.." He looked away, almost ashamedly as his eyes closed in disappointment.

I looked down, my stoic features remaining as I responded to the boy. "I see." I began, slowly turning to walk away. "I wish you luck on your mission, then."

A hand grabbed my wrist and I turned to watch as the boy smiled up at me kindly. "Thank you. I'll make sure to join you after this mission, I promise." He finished, letting go of my wrist and eyeing my kindly with a smile.

I only paused for a moment before nodding and swiftly disappearing down the hall.

I'll make sure he comes back from that mission.

That was my job, after all.

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

"Master Ubuyashiki." I spoke out by the door, my brows furrowed and my eyes determined. "I would like to make a request to-"

"You would like to make a request to follow them on their mission." The man