ordinary people living their lives, I've never felt more alone. No one can help me. Not the old lady with the Chihuahua hidden in her purse, or the girls laughing about their teachers, or the guy with the gym bag slung over his shoulder. I'm completely alone. But if I don't go back, he'll make Brett and Alecia disappear.

The next thing I know, I'm surrounded by snow-covered homes covered in Christmas decorations. Elliot's house is encrusted with gold. It will always be the light at the end of the tunnel.

I run as fast as I can and ignore the burn in my lungs. I unlock the front door with the key Elliot entrusted me with and crash inside, tearing off my coat and kicking off my boots. He isn't home from work yet. Good. I need to collect myself. I need to prepare. But all I can do is collapse on the living room couch and hide my face in my forearm and sob.

I'm weak on the outside, I know that. I'm not tall or muscular and I can't fight worth shit. But I'm strong on the inside. I'm strong where it matters. I'm smart, I'm careful, I'm a survivor.

With Colton Slater, I'm nothing.

What kind of fairytale fantasy world have I been living in? All the jealousy over Katie, the nervousness about Elliot. None of it matters. I can't be with him. Colt was always supposed to come back. Elliot and his world were an illusion, and after tonight, will be nothing but a memory.

I bawl into my hands. I don't want to leave. I can't leave him.

But I have to, and he'll never understand, so I'll do it quietly. Elliot will be home soon, and I don't want to waste my final hours crying. We still have one more night together, and I'm going to make it count. I want to feel his skin on mine and give him what Katie never did. I want him to know how special he his, how beautiful I find him.

But most of all, I'm a selfish bitch, because I want to be the first girl he ever sleeps with, so he has no choice but to remember me—even if he doesn't want to.