Scared of needles - Harry (Part 1)

Background color
Font
Font size
Line height

This story is for @jugglingzxs. Thank you so much for your request, I loved writing this!!!

Btw, do you guys think that my stories are too long? Should I try to keep them shorter? Any feedback is always welcome! And requests too so tell me what you wanna read next! :)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Harry's POV

I woke up this morning feeling absolutely miserable. My head hurt and my muscles felt extremely weak even though I had slept for more than ten hours.

Those symptoms had already started like two months ago. At first I thought it was just a simple cold or something like that. After a few weeks I tried to convince myself that it probably was because of the stress we had with our concerts and interviews and stuff.

Well, it was none of that because right now we were having a full week off, just spending our time at our apartment in London chilling all day, but I still didn't feel better. To be honest, I felt worse with every day that passed and I had to admit that I slowly started getting worried. And so did the other lads, but even though they had already told me I should go and see a doctor, I kept refusing to follow their advice. Because I was quite sure what would happen if I went there. And that was something I didn't want at all. Besides that I didn't feel that bad. It would go away soon, there was no need to see a doctor. That was what I kept telling myself at least.

I sighed and got out of bed. Even though I felt like I hadn't slept at all, I couldn't spend the whole day in bed. Sleep didn't seem to help anyway so it probably wouldn't make any difference where I was.

I managed to make my way down to the kitchen where the others were sitting at the table, breakfast already finished.

»Good morning, H«, Liam said and Niall laughed loudly.

»I'd rather say good midday, look at the clock. Harold, you've been quite a sleepyhead for the last couple of weeks.«

»Ni, leave him alone«, Louis said. »You know he doesn't feel well. How are you today, love?« He gave me a kiss on my cheek when I sat down next to him.

»I'm okay«, I lied. »Just a bit tired, but that's normal.«

Louis frowned. »To be honest, I don't think it is after you slept for ... how many hours?« I could feel his worried look at me and rolled my eyes. I didn't want to talk about it because I knew how this would end up. Niall and Liam would try to drag me to the doctor again and I would refuse like I always did. There was no point in arguing about that.

»Ten, but it's because of the stress«, I said while grabbing a toast from the breadbasket on the table.

»What stress?«, Niall asked. »We're having a week off. So if it was because of stress you should feel better by now, shouldn't ya?«

»Well«, I said. »I think I already do feel a bit better. Just a few more days and I'll be back to normal.«

I could see the others look at each other doubtfully. They didn't believe me. I mean, how would they? I didn't even believe myself, but still – there was no way I would go to the doctor.

»Haz, I think it wouldn't do any harm to you if you went to see a doctor«, Liam said. Well, there we were again. I took a deep breath to keep myself from freaking out at the unpleasant subject. It wasn't that I hadn't seen it coming though.

»He's right, H«, Niall said. »You're feeling unwell for too long already. You should finally get this checked out.«

»I already said no to this«, I said through gritted teeth. »Just stop talking about it, okay?«

Liam sighed. »I just don't understand. It's obvious that you're not okay. Why do you refuse getting help?«

Because this so called »help« would ram a fucking needle into my arm and this is not the kind of help I want for fuck's sake.

»That's none of your business«, I said harshly, but I couldn't help it. Just the thought of it made me feel hot and cold at the same time and I suddenly felt dizzy as my head started spinning. God, I had to get out of here.

»Excuse me«, I said, then I got up and left the room.

Louis' POV

»What was that?«, Niall asked confused.

»No idea. He's been in a mood lately«, Liam said and watched the door where Harry had just disappeared. »But I'm worried about him. I wish he wouldn't make such a fuss about a simple doctor's visit. Like what's his problem?«

I didn't say anything. I knew exactly what Harry's problem was. He had told me about it a couple of years ago – his intense fear of doctors and especially needles. It was a phobia he had developed as a child and I had promised him not to tell anyone about it.

»Lou?«, Liam asked. »You're quite silent, what's wrong?«

»Nothing«, I quickly said. »It's nothing, I was just ... thinking.«

»You know what's going on, don't you?«

Shit. Why was it so obvious? I started fidgeting uncomfortably. I hated lying to my mates, but I had to keep Harry's secret.

»No ... I mean, not really. It's just ... well ... I think I should go look after him.«

I could feel the lads' looks on me when I got up and left the room just like Harry did twenty seconds ago.

»They're both weird«, I could hear Niall say when I closed the door.

»Maybe it's a special kind of Larry weirdness«, Liam agreed, and if I wasn't so worried about my boyfriend's health, I would've laughed.

But I was worried so I kept quiet and went upstairs to Harry's and mine shared bedroom. I wasn't sure what I wanted to tell him yet, but I knew that we finally needed to talk.

When he had told me about his fear I had promised him that I would never force him to go to the doctor. He wanted to decide for himself if he was ready to go or not. And I was fine with that – I had given him my word. That was why I hadn't said anything about it for the last couple of weeks even though I had noticed that something was wrong with Harry. But now I started thinking that maybe his fear was so strong he wasn't able to rationally decide what was best for him. And I would rather break my promise than watching him putting his health at risk for any longer.

I knocked on the door before I entered. Harry was lying in our bed with his eyes closed, slightly shaking. I knew that Liam and Niall talking about the doctor stuff had stressed him out, and I already felt bad that I would pick up that subject yet again.

»Hazza?«, I asked softly and Harry opened his eyes. »Are you okay?«

At first I thought he would nod and act like everything was just fine like he did before, but then he slowly sat up in bed and shook his head.

Harry's POV

I felt myself being pulled into a hug and for a moment I just enjoyed the feeling of Louis' warm body against mine. 

»Can we talk about it, please?«, he asked after a minute and gently left my embrace so that he could look at me. »I won't try to force you to do anything you don't want to, I promise.«

His voice sounded pleadingly and I hesitated. I didn't want to talk about it, but on the other hand I was feeling extremely lonely with my problem. Of course Louis and the others knew that something was wrong, but they hadn't got much out of me. I had just hoped that it would go away by itself. But I slowly started realizing that it probably wouldn't.

»I'm scared«, I heard myself saying.

For a few seconds it was silent. Maybe Louis was just as surprised at my sudden honesty as I was myself.

»Scared of going to the doctor?«, he asked carefully.

»Yeah ... And that it might be ... something serious.« I bit my lip. Why the hell was it so hard to talk about it?

»What exactly are you feeling, Hazza?«, Louis asked. »I know about your tiredness, but that's not the only thing, is it?«

I shook my head and gulped. »It's actually a bunch of things. It's like ... everything just hurts. My head, my muscles, my chest sometimes ... I feel so tired and weak, but sleep doesn't help. And sometimes it's kinda hard to breathe ... I don't know what's wrong with me, Louis.«

Louis' POV

I could tell from Harry's voice how scared he was. His whole body was tensed up and he looked like he was close to tears.

»Thank you so much for telling me«, I said softly while rubbing his back to comfort him. 

I tried my best to stay calm, but I had to admit that knowing about Harry's symptoms got me even more worried. Something was obviously wrong and Harry himself thought that it might be something serious. What if ...

Stop. Harry had always been a little bit hypochondriac, and besides that he was always the strong and calming one whenever I was sick or something. Now it's your turn, Louis, so pull yourself together.

»Harry, love, I'm sure it's nothing serious«, I said and I was proud that I managed to make my voice sound calm. »Maybe it's just a lack of vitamins or something like that. But we need to find out in order to be able to make you feel better, you know?«

»I don't wanna go to the doctor«, Harry said and his voice was shaking. »They would draw blood, wouldn't they?«

»Well«, I said, deciding that there was no point in lying to him. »They probably would, yeah. But I promise you it will only be a small pinch, nothing more. And I'll be there for you and hold your hand the whole time. It will be a matter of a few seconds and then we can go home and cuddle as much as we want, how does that sound? You can do this, Hazza, I know you can, you're so strong!«

I looked at him, hoping for some kind of resignation in his facial expression. I did find the right words, didn't I? He would agree even though he was scared, but with me by his side he would be able to deal with it.

»No«, he said and I could feel all my hope fading. »Sorry Lou, but I won't do this. Never in my life will I have a fucking needle in my arm again.«

»Harry, please, it won't be ...«

»No!«, he interrupted me, his voice now louder. »You promised me you wouldn't force me so please stop this now.«

»I don't wanna force you, I just ...«

»Then stop it now!«, he yelled. »Stop it and leave me alone!«

His face was pale and his eyes reflected his intense fear. I knew he was scared, but right now I felt really upset to be honest. I hated seeing him suffer and I wanted to help him so badly, but he wouldn't let me and God, I hated that. 

I knew that there was no point in arguing any further as he had already decided to shut himself off from me so if he wanted me to go I would do him the favor for now.

»Okay then«, I said in a cool voice trying to hide my emotions as I got up, turned around and left.

Liam's POV

»He's coming«, Niall whispered. »Let's hide behind the cupboard over there!«

We quickly got away from the door of Harry's and Louis' bedroom and squeezed ourselves into the corner behind the cupboard right at the moment when Louis left the room.

He closed the door a little too loud, then I could hear his steps on the stairs. I already wanted to breathe out in relief when the steps suddenly stopped.

»What the hell are you two doing there?«, Louis asked. Well, at least we had tried.

»Umm ... Playing hide and seek«, Niall said in an innocent voice.

»Don't make a fool of me, Ni«, Louis said sounding annoyed. »You eavesdropped on our conversation, didn't you?«

»Well ... yeah«, Niall then admitted. »Sorry, mate.«

»I think it's important for us to know what's going on«, I said and got out of our stupid hiding place. »We need to help him, Lou.«

»It's not that I don't know that«, Louis said. »Anyway, can we not talk about it like right in front of his room? I don't want him to be even more angry with me by making him think that I had told you everything.«

So we went to the living room where we sat down on the sofa.

»He's going to be okay, Louis«, I said putting my hand on his shoulder. »We're gonna make him go to the doctor, no matter what. This needs to be checked out for sure.«

»We're not gonna make him go«, Louis said. »You don't know how scared he is, nothing could ... God, I'm not supposed to talk about it.«

»Lou, come on, this is about Harry's health. And besides that, we already know about his fear. The wall of your room is thin enough«, Niall said and I nodded in agreement.

Louis sighed. »Okay, but what do you suggest? We can't tie him up and drag him to the doctor.«

»Well«, I said. »If he refuses to go, then the doctor will just come to him.«

Louis doubtfully looked at me, then he buried his face in his hands. »He's going to hate me.«

Louis' POV

When Liam called the doctor I flapped around uneasily. This was going to be a tough evening, not only for Harry. I felt terrible for doing this to him, even though it was for his own good. But he trusted me. And I didn't know if he still would after this.

»It's going to be okay«, Niall said. »He will forgive you.«

I slightly shook my head. »I promised him I would never force him to go to the doctor. He will hate me for the rest of his life.«

»Nonsense, Louis«, Liam said who had just finished the call. »He loves you and he will understand that you only did it because you love him just as much. Besides that, it wasn't even you who called the doctor, it was me so if he needs someone to be angry with, he should choose me. The doctor will be here in half an hour by the way.«

Harry's POV

There was a knock on the door and I sighed. I wasn't ready for another fight with Lou. But I wanted to apologize for yelling at him and for making things difficult for him. I knew he really tried his best to be there for me and it certainly wasn't easy for him to see me that unwell all the time. It was just that I wasn't ready to go to the doctor. Not yet.

The door opened and Louis came in. I already wanted to start my apology speech when I saw Liam and Niall following him. I frowned. What was that going to be?

But then I saw a young woman entering the room behind the lads and I felt my heart starting to race. She couldn't be ... No! Louis would never do this to me.

»Harry, this is Dr. Brown«, Liam said. »She's going to examine you. And before you start yelling at Louis again – he didn't tell us anything plus he didn't call her, okay?«

Louis' POV

I chewed on my lip and wished Liam would talk less harshly. All I wanted was for Harry to be okay. His eyes found mine and I could see a mixture of panic and anger in them.

»Are you kidding me?«, he asked glaring at me. »You agreed? Great. I trusted you.«

His words almost broke my heart and I had to try hard to hold back the tears.

»Harry, you're gonna be okay«, I said as I tried to pull myself together. »I'm here for you, I promise.«

»I don't want you to be here. And stop talking about promises – you just broke one.«

»Harry, stop this«, Liam started, but I shook my head to signal him to stop. It wouldn't do any good.

The only person who still seemed to be calm was Dr. Brown. We had told her before that the situation might become a little complicated, but she probably was used to things like that.

»Hello Mr. Styles«, she now said smiling kindly at Harry. »You don't need to be scared. I just want to do a quick examination if that's okay for you.«

I could see the fear in Harry's eyes. At least he wasn't rude enough to yell at her. But still – I had a feeling that he wouldn't make this too easy for us. And my feeling was right.

»No, it's not okay«, he said and suddenly jumped out of bed, too fast for any of us to hold him back. I could already see him leaving the room and locking himself in the bathroom, but before he even reached the door he stumbled ...

Niall's POV

... and fell right into my arms.

»Oh my God, Harry!«, I yelled in shock, fearing that he had just passed out, but after a second I felt him moving as I lowered him to the ground. Liam, Louis and Dr. Brown were instantly by his side.

»I'm fine«, he said and tried to sit up. »Just got a bit dizzy.«

»Remain lying down for a bit, please«, Dr. Brown said and gently pushed him back into a lying position. Liam took a pillow from the bed and placed it under Harry's head. 

»Do things like that happen to you on occasion?«, Dr. Brown asked.

»They happen once in a while«, Harry mumbled and I could see Louis shaking his head as if he couldn't believe he hadn't noticed how bad Harry had been feeling all the time.

After a few minutes we helped him getting up and lying down in his bed again. He didn't fight or tried to run away again - maybe he was just too tired after he had nearly passed out.

»Okay, I'm going to measure your blood pressure now«, Dr. Brown said, but as she tried to roll up Harry's sleeve, he pulled his arm back.

»Hazza, it's just measuring blood pressure. There are no needles, it's nothing to be scared of at all«, Louis said.

»I know«, Harry quickly said. He luckily seemed to have forgotten about his anger at Louis. »It's just ... Could you use my other arm?«

I frowned and looked at Liam and Louis who also didn't seem to understand. But at least Harry seemed to be okay with Dr. Brown measuring his blood pressure at all.

»Of course«, she said and started doing her work on Harry's other arm. Louis took his hand and comfortingly rubbed it with his thumb as Harry closed his eyes in discomfort. Did he feel pain? Or was he just scared? I didn't really understand this kind of phobia, but now that I saw Harry in this situation I knew what Louis had talked about before.

After Dr. Brown had finished the blood pressure stuff she listened to Harry's lungs and his heartbeat, then took a look into his throat. Louis kept holding his hand and I started stroking his hair, hoping it would comfort him a bit while Liam talked to him to distract him from whatever was making him feel so uncomfortable.

»Okay Mr. Styles«, Dr. Brown said when she finished the examination. »You did really well, you know?« She smiled at him and Harry seemed to relax a little as he thought that he was done now. But there was something we hadn't told him yet ...

Louis' POV

I felt myself tensing up the same moment as Harry started to relax a bit. He didn't know that the hardest part was yet about to come.

»All we have to do now is drawing a bit blood and then you're all done«, Dr. Brown said, trying to make it sound like the easiest thing in the world. But not for Harry. The second he heard the words »drawing blood« I could feel his body tensing up and his eyes widened in fright.

»No«, he said in a panicked tone and looked at me as if he expected me to get him out of this situation. God, I wished I could. I wished it wasn't necessary for him to get that done, but it was.

»Haz, listen to me«, I said in a reassuring tone. »I'm here, okay? I'm holding your hand so it won't hurt and before you know it everything will be done. You just need to relax a bit; can you do that for me, love?«

»No!«, Harry yelled and tried to get up, but this time we were prepared. Liam grabbed his legs while Niall pushed down his shoulders and I tightened my grip on Harry's wrists.

»NO!«, he screamed in fear as he realized that he was trapped. »Let me go! Lou, you promised me!«

»Shhhh Harry, it's okay, you're okay«, Liam said as I found myself unable to speak due to a giant lump that was suddenly sitting in my throat. For fuck's sake, I was holding down my boyfriend causing him to have a fucking panic attack and forcing him to do the thing he dreaded the most. I had never felt worse in my entire life.

»You're going to feel a

You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net