๐”น๐• ๐•Ÿ๐•ฆ๐•ค~ ๐”ฝ๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•Ÿ๐•š๐•”๐•œ โ„™๐•†๐•~

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"๐ธ๐‘ฃ๐‘’๐‘Ÿ๐‘ฆ ๐‘๐‘œ๐‘ค ๐‘Ž๐‘›๐‘‘ ๐‘‡โ„Ž๐‘’๐‘› ๐ผ ๐น๐‘Ž๐‘™๐‘™ ๐ด๐‘๐‘Ž๐‘Ÿ๐‘ก, ๐ถ๐‘Ž๐‘ข๐‘ ๐‘’ ๐ผ ๐‘›๐‘’๐‘’๐‘‘ ๐‘ฆ๐‘œ๐‘ข ๐‘๐‘œ๐‘ค ๐‘ก๐‘œ๐‘›๐‘–๐‘”โ„Ž๐‘ก, ๐ผ ๐‘›๐‘’๐‘’๐‘‘ ๐‘ฆ๐‘œ๐‘ข ๐‘š๐‘œ๐‘Ÿ๐‘’ ๐‘กโ„Ž๐‘Ž๐‘› ๐‘’๐‘ฃ๐‘’๐‘Ÿ. "
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ย  "It's fine, they might be mad at us for a bit but they'll come around."

"No I don't think you quite understand, she's the only thing keeping him alive, keeping him sane. We need to get all of them"

"We will when the time is right, the point is we have who we need and that's Katniss, we'll get the boy and the girls soon"

"I just hope you realize what risk you're taking."

I wake up to muttering voices, my head throbs and my body feels weakened.

What even happened.

I open my eyes to a bright light above me, I squint to readjust my lightening.

I groan in pain as I sit up and look around. Laying next to me is Katniss, her eyes closed and she seems to be whispering something.

My hearing is a bit damaged and I can feel I broke a few bones, I'm guessing from the impact of the lightening strike.

Looking over I see beetee alive and well, but no Victoria.

I saw her with Peeta aren't they safe?

I snap my head around to the voices once more, "I'm sure they'll understand" a woman's voice speaks.

"I'm sure they'll have us on their kill list" the voice of Plutarch rings out and I sit up and slide off the medical table. I quickly pull the tubes from my body out that gave me medicine and I walk to the doors.

They automatically open and both Coin and Plutarch the game maker look over at me.

I blankly stare at both of them back and forth.

"Where's Victoria" my voice rings out in the silence it was a weakened voice, not as manly as I normally have it.

Both look at each other before She looks back at me, "the capital got them. Johanna, Peeta.. Victoria."

Her names rings out, it takes a bit for my slow moving brain to quite understand her words.

She's in the capital.

My best friend and Lover are both. Which means I'm alone here.

I look down at the ground then back up at Plutarch. I rush to him and grip him by the collar pulling him to me.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU SAID YOUD GET HER OUT!! WHERES HAYMITCH HE PROMISED!!" I scream out but mixed emotions as tears begin to roll down my cheeks in frustration and pain.

"We promised after Katniss and Peeta Finnick. Peeta is in the capital too" I ignore his words.

I hear faint footsteps as I'm injected with something and I hyperventilate as I try to regain my control of my own body I snap in and out as I tumble to the ground I watch as Coin watches us and I look her straight in the eyes as My vision blurs from the tears within them.

Darkness takes over as I fall back into a sleep.

Victoria was suppose to get out. I made a promise to protect her. I failed. Would she ever forgive me. Only if she's still alive. Please be.
I have to get her.

My last thoughts were of Victoria and her voice, her lips, her touch, her smile, her love.

~

ย  Waking up once more I look over to find Katniss starring at me, her eyes seem red and puffy. She must have found out as well. We lock eyes as I think this.

"Finnick" Katniss rings out. "Do you think they're alive." She asks softly.

I try to find my words, to reassure her that they are. As my own vision blurs. Because I don't know.

She takes my silence as the answer as Plutarch walks in, "we're landing in five, welcome to district thirteen." he simply says his face seems a bit sorrow and guilty.

Thirteen was suppose to be in ashes long ago.

All I know is that as soon as I see Haymitch I'm giving him the what for.

~

ย  Walking out of the aircraft, I am met by medics who try to help me, my eyes I know are red and puffy and I glance over my surroundings to make eye contact with a pair of green eyes. He stands there starring at me, I watch as his eyes turn into anger and frustration as he turns away and makes his way up the stairs.

Weird, he seemed familiar.

I ignore the medics and rush to follow up with him, he didn't seem to notice as I followed.

I stop after he went into a room with two double doors. I heard a faint voice but I knew it was his,"Where the Hell is Victoria!"

He knows Victoria, Vic told me about him, I've seen him before too on television about eight years ago. It can't be.

I ignore my thoughts as I hear a mutter of Haymitch voice. I quickly do the same as the guy before as I rush into the door slamming it I make eye contact with Haymitch.

Gripping his collar, "YOU PROMISED!" I could feel hands of guards trying to pry me off but it's no use. I'm too strong compared to them as a voice fills the air.

"Oh I see so you promised him to?? Let me guess. They asked you to join the rebellion, you agree only if they get Vic out but what do they do?? They lied to you too didn't they? You know it's not very kind to lie to victors who have been in the arena and have killed people before" his voice rings out.

Gage. How is he even alive, we watched him die eight years ago. I look over to see him glare at coin as he then nods in my direction and I glare at her myself

"Relax, she is in the capital, along with Peeta and Johanna, Katniss has already came to us pissed off as well, we will be sending a rescue team." Her voice rings out.

"I'm going" I quickly say cause she's my damn girlfriend and I shouldn't have let her slip away.

Gages voice rings out once more,
"No. You're Victoria's lover. If she loves you I have to protect you as well. You are also way to weak right now Finnick. You need to rest"
He says sternly and I open my mouth to protest but he's right.

With that we are excused.

I watch as Gage quickly rushes out, I rush to catch up to him, I need answers "so you're Gage.. Victoria's first love. Didn't you-"

"Die?" He says sternly looking out at where he is going. "yes, it's a long story, I have been watching Vic grow up from afar, it was too dangerous to tell her for if I did snow might catch on and then put everyone at risk. Even her."

"You watched our relationship" I ask, if anything he still loves her, I can see that.

I watch as he stops in his tracks to face me and stare into similar green eyes as well, "yes. It pained me. But I am dead to her. Thank you Finnick. I'm not mad. I'm happy. You made her find hope, love, passion. Something more to fight for. I had to protect her at a different part from afar but you protected her from within, I'm truly grateful she found you. That she loves you. You gave her what she needed. I'll bring her back to you. I promised her no matter what I'd find her. I'd keep her safe and I've been doing so since the last moments I saw her."

I could tell he meant it. Every word. He wasn't angry with us being together. Which means he truly cares about her happiness and well being. It means he actually loves her. I watch his back as he disappears around a corner.

Even after all that time, he still was protecting her. Even if it meant watching her with another man. I can't help but admire him for it. But when she gets back.

Will she have to choose?

Would she choose him, even after eight years.

I can't help but feel a sickening in my stomach.

As long as she's happy. She's safe.

~

The dinning hall is empty, around midnight as I'm on my eleventh bottle of beer. I drink and drink, maybe I won't feel it. The pain. What if she doesn't make it back. What if she's gone.

I take another sip with that thought, but even with all of the alcohol I can drink down seems as her face, the memory of her only worsens.

I stare along out at the empty tables as I hear faint footsteps, "Finnick" I hear a woman's voice. But I knew it was katniss.

I chuckle to myself, "mmm can't sleep either"

With that she comes over to sit a few feet away on a chair, "no. Peeta" was all she said and I could understand.

I had almost forgotten that she had lost Peeta too and that she knew how it felt in a way.

"You can't drown out your pain Finnick" she says and I chuckle once more as I take another swig.

"I'm not, in fact it makes it worse." I bit the inside of my cheek as I could feel my body weaken from the thoughts of losing her completely.
"I- I can't live without her katniss. I don't see a future without her. Gage is back, what if she falls in love with him all over. Of course I'd be happy for her but. But I can't share her, she's mine. Has been for eight years. Every day." I don't know Katniss but I'm too drunk to even think about holding back how I feel.

I know Victoria is strong with whatever the capital throws at her, but am I? Am I strong enough without her?

Katniss places her hand on top of mine as I could feel a tear stream down my face, "finnick, you're crying" she says softly and I brush it away and clear my throat.

"No. I'm sorry. I just-" she interrupts me and tries to softly smile as we make eye contact.

"It's okay. I know. I can't do this rebellion without Peeta. I didn't ever want to admit it but I love Peeta. I do. I don't think I realized how much until I... lost him" she mutters the last part and looks down.

I sigh and pull her over to me to hug her, I didn't know this little girl but I saw Victoria in her, she was only seventeen and still barely hanging on. She was still trying to be strong.

"We'll get them back Katniss. One way or another" I say as she lets in the hug and hugs me back.

I feel as though I have to protect Katniss as well, she's not an ally anymore, she's a friend.

~

"They landed, they're here!" Katniss rings out to me. In excitement.

I widen my eyes as the people around stare at both of us as we run together down flights of stairs to the launch pads.

We didn't care, we were just happy to have them back.

Victoria, all I could think about all the time was of her.

I smile as I watch the air craft open, I watch as the soldiers step out one by one, I watch Peeta step out as Katniss cries over to him. Although his face was beaten and I could see a hint of hate in his eyes when he looked at Katniss.

What did they do.

I watch as Johanna comes out her hair shaved and weakened fragile body as Victoria comes out after her.

I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch her wild blue/grey eyes take in her surroundings, her blonde hair falls upon her bruised up face and her body is weak as she lost weight.

She makes eye contact with me as Johanna nudges her to me and whispers something, how odd. I think but I didn't care. Tears stream down my face as I run to embrace her, "VIC! Thank god you're here! I was so worried. I let You down vic" I hug her tightly but she doesn't hug me back. Not one movement. It's like when I look in her eyes she sees nothing but a stranger. Someone she doesn't know.
"Vic?" I softly speak to her.

Her eyes seem confused but sad as she opens her mouth to speak. The longing of her Angelic voice rings out as I've been waiting so long to hear again.

"I- I don't remember" she speaks and I freeze in place. I release the grip on her as I don't want to pressure her when she doesn't even know me.

This was the capitals punishment. To forget me. To hurt me from within. To have me lose the only thing that's kept me okay, sane.

I watch as her eyes are sad from my reaction and she gets pulled away as Coin walks over to greet her.

I stand by from a distance as I watch coin introduce people and I watch as realization hits when she meets gages eyes.

She remembers him.

She doesn't remember me.

I've lost her.

Right?

~

I didn't go to supper, I knew Victoria would be there.

It's only been a few hours since they got back. She might even be in the hospital.

I should be there to comfort her, as I want to do. But the look in her eyes when she sees me as someone she doesn't remember, or know. Pains me.

I'll suck it up because I love her and I'll still face that even if it's painful just to comfort her. The woman I love.

I close my eyes and breathe in as the air from the rooftop blows on my face.

The day I met her was on a rooftop.

Eight years ago.

I take another swig as memories flash back to me, her laugh, her smile, her beautiful eyes that lighten when she sees me.

Does she look at Gage like that?

"You know fish sticks, sitting here and feeling sorry for yourself won't help her memory" Johannas weak voice calls out and I turn my head to look at her.

I scan her body and also tear up to see what the capital did to my best friend.

"Joh-" I barley get out as I embrace her fragile body.

She takes it in and sighs, "I'm sorry..I let you down. I tried" she says and I shake my head as I smile softly at her.

"Shut up, it's okay. I lost both of you. I should have protected both of you Johanna. She might be my love but you're also my best friend" I say and she makes out a soft smile to me.

" she'll remember Finnick, it will take time but she will."

I shrug and look back out at the ruble before me.

"She loves you Finnick. That's why the capital took your memories. Because you're the one she loves. You're the one that keeps her sane and happy. It's you in the end Finnick and everyone knows it."

I huff a bit, "and what about Gage hmm? The guy we all thought died. She remembers him why would she even want me and what even happens if she doesn't remember again."

Johanna seems a bit speechless and she stands over next to me, "then you'll make her remember you Finnick, you'll make new memories, make her fall in love with you again. Yes, Gage might be her first love, but you fin"
she pauses for a moment before she speaks again as I glance at her.

"You're gonna be her last.
Who was there through the nightmares? Who was there to make her smile when she remembered her past. Who was there to help her face snow, who was there right beside her during the reaping. Who was there to mentally and physically protect her. Who was there when she died, who saved her life? Who was there?"

I choke back my tears, "me." I simply say and she smiles once more and nods.

"You fishsticks. You'll be there til the end.
As you two always say, stay with her."

I look back out and sigh in relief a bit. In hope.

"Always" I mutter.

It's not the end, I'll try, I'll make her remember me. Because I can't lose her. I won't lose her.

I need her.

๐ผ ๐‘™๐‘œ๐‘ฃ๐‘’ โ„Ž๐‘’๐‘Ÿ.

A/N

ย  I changed some scenes from the actual book, obviously cause I had to because of Victoria added but I still hope you enjoy.

The POV are long chapters. As I like them to be. I'll be jumping back and forth with Chapters and POV from Finnick and a little from Gage. As it's nice to see different POV from them.

I still have to review and go over and I might change a few or add things here and there to add more detail as I edit through this Book!

Thank you for your patience as I have work and classes, I'll have a few chapters being posted tomorrow,

With all the love,

~ Emma xx

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