No other man has made me feel like this. Only him. And I shouldn't be feeling like this but I can't help but crave him. I can't say that I hate him without feeling like I'm lying to myself and him. My feelings for him are beyond a stupid crush that I thought I would get over. Admitting that out loud is what I'm scared of.

Admitting that I love him.

I told myself I wouldn't get to close to him because I didn't want to get hurt again. But my dumbass did. And now I'm helplessly in love with the man I've hated for years.

Why can't I just hate you?

Speaking of Ace, the motherfucker has been acting weird all day. Like when I woke up this morning I found his side of the bed cold.

I went to look for him but apparently he went to work. Normally when he goes to work he would tell me but this time he didn't. No texts. No calls. No notes. Nothing.

I tried talking to him but he just brushes me off. I tried kissing him but he moves away. I tried hugging him but he says to leave him alone.

If he wants to be like that again then fine. But this time I will too.

First, I'll give him one last chance to stop with his childish act. Bipolar little shit.

I open his office door and walk over to where he is at his desk, signing papers. I roll my eyes when he doesn't even look up from the papers on his desk after I walk in.

"Want to do something? I'm bored." I ask, walking over to him.

"I'm busy." He grumbles, not sparing me a glance.

I stand beside him and cup his cheeks, forcing him to meet my gaze, "What's wrong, Ace? You've been distant all day."

He lets out a harsh breath, moving my hands of his face, "Nothing. Leave me alone." He says coldly, going back to his work.

"Fine, come find me when you're not being an ass." I scoff, walking away from him and slamming the door shut to his office.

"What's up with you?" Theo asks, walking beside me.

"Nothing! Your boss is just being an asshole!" I throw my hands up in frustration, walking downstairs.

"He probably needs space. Want to go out?" He asks, following me into the kitchen.

"Sure. As long as we're not working." I say, opening the fridge and grabbing a snack.

We've been trying to find Ivan all day since we haven't heard from him in months.

He throws his arm around my shoulder and ruffles my hair, "What do you wanna do, dumbass?"

"I could've spilt my drink." I huffed, "And my hair you dickhead!" I push him away, fixing my hair again.  I just straightened it too.

"So dramatic." He rolls his eyes, "Answer my question." He says, nudging my shoulder to piss me off more.

"Ice cream. Now stop pissing me off." I grumble, smacking the back of his head.

"Meet me out front in ten." He says with a smile.

"Alright stop smiling. You're freaking me out." I say, grimacing at him.

He purposely smiles at me more and I laugh at how constipated he looks.

"Seriously." I chuckle, putting a palm over his face.

"What?" He laughs.

"Did you just shit yourself? What was that face?"

"How dare you." He gasps dramatically, putting a palm over his chest.

"I'm getting away from your ugly ass." I say, turning around and walking up the stairs.

"You're one to talk." He calls out after me.

"Fuck you, Theo." I call back, sticking my middle finger up at him over my shoulder as he chuckles.

I walk into my room and go over to my closet. I pick out a red crop top and a pair of mom jeans. Once I put them on, I put my chain and rings on along with my red air jordan 1s to match my outfit. I put my red yankees cap on and put my phone into my pocket before walking back out of my room.

Walking down the halls, I spotted Ace coming out of his office with his phone in his hands. Our eyes locked when he looked up from his phone. A scowl grew on his face when his eyes looked me up and down. Rolling my eyes, I walked past him but stopped when I heard his deep voice speak from
behind me.

"Where the fuck are you going dressed like that?" He grits out.

I halt my movements, turning to face him fully, "So we're speaking now?" I sneered, glaring at him.

"Where the fuck are you going dressed like that?" He repeats, his tone dark and cold.

"To a fucking club. Maybe I'll find some guy to fuck." I lie, walking away from him.

Suddenly, he grips my wrist and pins me to the wall, placing both of his hands on either side of my head. His cold, green eyes stare intensely into mine and I shrink under his gaze.

"If I see another mans hands on you, River, I swear to God I will kill him and make you watch. I'll tie you to a chair, have a vibrator strapped to your pussy, and have you cum over and over again while I murder him."

"You're sick." I seethe, clenching my thighs.

He dips his head down to my eye level, "You love it." He whispers with a sinister smirk.

I scowl at him and push his chest, "I said come find me when you're not being an ass." I grit out, walking away from him.

xXx

Theo and I decided to drive to a nearby cliff and drive of it.

He called me crazy for telling him to do that so instead he parked the car near it. We're sitting on the edge of it with our feet dangling off the edge and ice cream cones in our hands. Music from the car booms into our ears. I told Theo to turn it off or my ears might bleed but of course he didn't.

"Is he always bipolar?" I ask, turning my head to him.

"Ace?" He ask and continues talking when I nod my head, "You would think that because I'm his best friend he would tell me shit but he doesn't. He's always been like this. Closed off." He says, frowning slightly as he stares at his hands. Seeming to be deep in thought.

"I wish I knew him." I mutter, staring down at the lake that's below us.

"You're all he talks about," Theo chuckles, throwing an arm over my shoulder, "I even think you know him more than I do."

"He doesn't tell me shit either." I sigh. I wish he knows that he's safe to talk about anything with me.

"My man has been alone for most of his life. It's hard for him but he'll come round so don't worry." He says, ruffling my hair again. I frown at the thought of him being stuck with his thoughts alone.

My phone started ringing so I took it out of my pocket, rolling my eyes when I see Ace's contact number on the screen.

"What?" I snap as soon as I answer the phone.

"Where the fuck are you?" He questions angrily.

"Out." I say blankly.

"Why is there music, River?" He questions as I hear rustling on the other end of the call.

"I told you I was going to a club." I lie, smirking when Theo furrows his eyes brows at me.

"You're dead when you come back." He spat out angrily, hanging up the phone.

"Bastard." I mutter under my breath, putting my
phone away.

Light drops of rain began sprinkling down on us from the grey clouds above.

"Let's go back home before it starts raining even more." Theo says, getting up and helping me up too.

We make our way back to the car and thankfully Theo turns off the music. The rain starts to get heavier and heavier as we drive back home. The sky has now been completely covered with ebony, grey clouds.

Later we pull up into Ace's driveway.  Theo turns off the car, opening his door and walks inside. I put on a hoodie and step out of the car, slamming the door shut behind me.

I almost groan when I see Ace standing outside in the rain with his arms crossed over his broad chest. Is he crazy? He could get sick.

"Did you have fun?" He asks, tilting his head to the side as his gaze burns into mine.

"So much." I scoff, walking past him.

He grabs my wrist and pulls me flush against him, "I did warn you."

"I don't give a fuck. Leave me alone." I grit out, pushing his chest but he doesn't budge.

"Don't tell me what to do." He seethes.

"Seriously Ace, what the fuck is your problem? Why have you been such a dick to me all day?!" I yell over the rain, glaring at him.

He swallows thickly, narrowing his eyes at me yet he doesn't say anything.

"Answer me you piece of shit!" I push his chest, making him stumble back slightly.

Water droplets trickled down our faces as we stood

in the rain. I ran both my hands threw my hair as
he stood there in silence, staring at the ground.

His head hung low, fuelling my anger more, "What did I do that makes you hate me so fucking much?" I ask, throwing my hands up in the air frustratingly.

"You fuck me. You say all these things to me. You said that no strings were suppose to be attached but I can't even go out with another man without you freaking out over it! We're not even dating Ace!" I yell as the water droplets trail down our faces.

He didn't dare to answer. Instead he poked the finer of his mouth, keeping his gaze to the floor.

Slowly, he lifted his head up to meet my gaze.
His green eyes met mine. His jaw tensed as his fists clenched by his sides. His brunette hair stuck to his forehead due to the rain as his shirt clung to his body, showcasing his defined muscles.

"Tell me what we are because I'm fucking tired! Tell me why you hate me so goddamn much!"

He ran both of his hands through his hair
before the truth finally left his lips.

The truth that caused my heart to stop beating.