🥀 Synopsis 🥀

Taehyung neglects boyfriend of 3 years and it eventually leads to the worst.

⚠
/drug abuse/
/rape/
/depression/
/anorexia/
/depression/
/toxicity/

[bonus chapter]

Taehyung stumbled a little as he was pushed into a cell. After removing his handcuffs, the guard closed the door to the cell and left.

What happened?

Well, starting off, he has gotten a 6 years sentence for drug abuse and unintentional murder.

After that night, the male found jungkook in a pool of his own blood, body white as paper, blue veins clearly being seen, while he was leaving the house to meet his friends. Panicking, he called for an ambulance, not realising the problems that will trail along.

After jungkook was taken to the hospital and was pronounced dead along with his baby, the police had interrogated taehyung. Everything that had come out of his mouth in the interrogation were white lies.

He lied about having the perfect relationship with jungkook, about never drinking let alone going to a club before. And just to cover up these, he created a million other lies.

The police being suspicious, especially considering taehyung being surprised when he found out jungkook was pregnant despite the male already being 8 months in, traces of anti-depressive drugs in jungkook's blood and many more like jungkook having very few clothes, the bedroom having clothes and items of only one person, etc.

So after digging up the house a bit, the found jungkook's pregnancy reports and the adoption contract(?). This proved them right that he was lying. After doing a lir detection test, the results were not determinable.

After a lot of decision making, they did the hypnosis therapy on him. They first sedated him and just as he woke up and was still in a daze, they hypnotized him so that he doesn't resist.

That's when he confessed everything, including how he pushed the male, the mistreatment, the drugs, the rape, the theft, everything.

After a court trial, he was sentenced for 6 years while his friends were sentenced for 5. And as they were cleaning up the house, a worker found jungkook's diary. It was clearly stated to give the book to taehyung if anything happened to him so that's what they did.

Present

Taehyung gulped, looking at the book infront of him. This book had every single detail about his deeds.

He caressed the cover. It was adorable covered in a sky blue with pink, purple and darker blue clouds were on the top. It exactly depicted the jungkook he fell in love with.

The jungkook that was always positive, never let things get to him, a bunny smile that never seemed to leave his face. His jungkook.

But... The last time he saw jungkook, he had completely changed. His hair had overgrown, not a trace of his Bunny smile on his face, dried tears that always adorned his cheeks, red puffy eyes, thin. It felt like a dark cloud was on top of his head. What hurt more was he was the reason for this.

The reason for jungkook's death. The male did nothing but love and support him, never complained about anything, earned for him, gave him a roof on top of his head, fed him. Yet all taehyung could give back was...

He gulped again and opened the book. And there it was written 'when will I get my wings?' in a beautiful font that taehyung knew jungkook himself had written considering how the smaller male was a pro in calligraphy.

And under the huge font, 'the first person to read this book other than me shall be Kim taehyung, thank you!' in a smaller font. He shakily sighed and opened the book, seeing another page of cute doodling of animals, food, items, you name it.

He flipped that page too, the first page of actual writing coming into sight. He wasn't ready. He wasn't ready to see jungkook suffer but this was his punishment. A small smile appeared on his face looking at jungkook's messy but extremely aesthetically pleasing handwriting.

XX/XX/XX

5 months. Five months since I have been ignored by my own boyfriend. Why? I don't know. But what I know is it hurts. It hurts more than my parents disowning me or more than my closest people betraying me. What have i done? I ask myself everyday. As long as I remember, I haven't done anything. It was just another day when it started. At least tell me. Tell me what I have done and I will try to change my self.

The pain is too much, I have to release in some where. That's why I'm writing this diary. And I have decided to do it only on the days I am truly happy.

Why am I happy today? It's because... Me and tete had our first ever talk in 5 months. It felt so good... Hearing his voice. Although it wasn't the same. His eyes no longer held the warmth and love instead held hatred... Towards me? He told me that he needed money and I didn't waste a minute to give my entire month's salary to him. If that's what makes him talk to me, I am willing to give my every penny I earn. I just hope he talks to me from today onwards.

- Jeon Jungkook.

~~~

XX/XX/XX

it's been a long time since I've written this, guess I'm not happy any more? But today, after a good few months, I've been the happiest. I feel like smiling the whole day. This almost feels new to me. Feeling happy. But it feels good. What is the reason? I'm pregnant. no I haven't cheated on taehyung. It's his child only.

How? How did it happen?

He... Forced himself onto me. It hurt. It hurt a lot. I bled for an entire week. The skin tore. I wasn't able to sit properly. My underwear always stained with blood. Despite all of these, I stayed. I didn't say anything. Because I know. I know that he will leave me. And I sont believe that I will be able to leave if he's not there. It just makes my day better, looking at his face or at least feeling his presence.

He had kicked me out of the room recently. Now I sleep on the couch, without a blanket or even a pillow. Everything I own goes to him. Yet, he doesn't talk to me. What more do I have to do? It has been almost a week since I've eaten and probably 3-4 days since a drop of water had entered my body.

But now I will. I will eat. Even if it makes me nauseous. Because now, I have an innocent being growing in me. And at least for the sake of them, i am going to eat. Should I tell him? That I am bearing his child?

- Jeon Jungkook

~~~

XX/XX/XX

That was pretty fast, considering the last time interval. I'm now 8 months in. I have worked overtime for the past few months to earn a little extra so I can go to check ups. And today, I found out the best news ever. It had made me the happiest. Happier than I've ever been, even than when me and taehyung got together.

The doctor said that the survival rate for me when I give birth is very less because all the nutrition that had to go to me is being taken by the baby. It makes sense though, I hardly eat and my baby needs nutrition. And I'm glad. Glad that I will no longer be here. I will finally be able to set tete free.

No. I haven't told tete yet. And I don't want to. I heard him talk to his friends the other day, saying he hated kids and didn't want them until he was a lot older. I knew. I knew that if I told him, he would leave me. I didn't want that.

It's hard. Working with the constant back pain and the new cramps. But I have to go through it. At least for the sake of my baby. I seem to smiling a lot lately. Maybe it's because I can finally leave? Yeah, maybe.

Everyone will be happy. Isn't what they always wanted anyways?

- Jeon Jungkook

~~~

XX/XX/XX (day of the incident)

Im not happy today. It wasn't my plan to write today but. Today, I've been anything but happy. Tete called me fat this morning. I know. I know I'm fat. But I have a life growing inside me. I knew I should have waited another two days to eat something but I couldn't help but think of my child.

I checked my weight. 52 kgs. The doctor said I at least had to be 60 kgs for the baby to be healthy. But I can't help it. It isn't my fault that everytime I eat, I puke. I want him to somehow understand. Understand that it's getting hard for me. I'm barely holding on. It's like I'm holding onto a string that is ready to break off at any moment.

The work pressure is getting too much, now that my delivery is getting closer. But, the happy part is, the closer the delivery gets, the closer I get to leaving the world. Just the thoughts seems to make me happy these days.

I've also talked to an orphanage recently. They were saddened by my situation but I couldn't tell them that my child has a father who lives under the same roof as me. I don't want my child to live a life like mine. I want them to be happy. They HAVE  to be happy.

I've been feeling weird since morning. Like something is going to happen. Something very wrong. But all I hope is, whatever happens, it happens to me. Because I deserve it. I am a waste of space and time on this planet. Isn't that what everyone thinks? I hope, nothing happens to me baby or to tete. Because they deserve all the happiness in the world. Not someone like me. Not a lover like me nor a mother like me. 

And at last, if anything happens to me and I no longer am able to write this diary : tete, I love you. More than I have ever loved myself. And I forgive you, forgive you for all the things you have done. Why? Because I deserve them. I'm sorry, I probably look like a pig, like you mentioned, and am maybe an embarrassment to you. I always was. I don't know, I don't know what else to do. I hope that at least a single part of you misses me when I'm gone. Also, yes. You are going to be a father. I hope your happier when I'm gone and continue to be the carefree person you are.

And don't worry. I have started a savings account for you and it currently has enough money for you to last the next 3 years if it is used properly. I hope you find someone who can keep you happy, unlike me. I will be watching you. I will watch you get married, become a father, grow old, all with your significant partner and will guide you.

I love you, tete. I always did and always will.

- Jeon Jungkook.

~~~

"p-please. Please I'm sorry! Come back!"

He sobbed, his entire body shaking as he held the book close to his chest. What was he thinking? What was he thinking while doing all of this.

He wasn't like this. He was a person who would not even hurt a single mosquito despite it sucking blood from him. Was this really the taehyung everyone knew 3 years ago?

He used a person for money, as a slave, and at last, killed them. He couldn't believe it. He felt disgusted.

His body shook as he sobbed hysterically. Jungkook's beautiful bunny smile and doe eyes that seemingly held the whole galaxy flashed infront of his eyes. And right after, his teary,empty eyes and sad, meaningless smile.

The guards that passed by looked at him in pity and disgust. And he didn't mind. He knew he deserved it.

He w a s going to be a father. His dream. That too with jungkook. Yet, he killed both of them with his own hands.

A monster. A monster is what he is.

"I love you jungkook-ah. Always did, always will"

And just like that, he lived the rest of his life. Guilt consuming him. He always had the diary with him. It was the last memory of jungkook left with him. He didn't even manage to find a single picture of jungkook.

And just like jungkook, he held onto the last string. Until, he finally hung himself. He passed away with a smile. He can finally meet his koo. And his little angel. Apologise to both of them and be happy. That is, if he goes to heaven.

~~~~~

I don't know I don't know I don't know. Ik the ending was a little weird but I'm not good at writing angst T_T.
So yeah, I hope this satisfied
vtkrxna
Anygays, hope you liked the chapter and have a wonderful day ahead!
Also, shout out to :
_jjiyeon
For voting!! Thank you so much for the support 💕
- Pari <3

Not proofread.