chapter 11 - guardian or heir

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They say that the weight of the earth is thirteen septillion pounds. Well, technically it's measured by mass and not weight, but still, thirteen septillion. I don't know how someone can determine that, scientist or not, but apparently it's true. Of course, we as humans will never physically feel that overwhelming "weight" no matter where we are in life.

However, if we go through something extremely traumatic, like losing a loved one, per se, it can certainly feel as if we have the weight of the world on our shoulders.

Apparently, there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Dakota could only assume that she was at the very first step, because for the life of her, she could not fathom the reality of her situation. She was trying so desperately to avoid the inevitable because it just wasn't possible. Kota didn't want to believe that she just witnessed Clarke close her sister's eyelids to signify the end of her life. She refused to accept that that the uncontrollable sobs coming from Clarke were real. That any of this was real.

It all happened so fast, yet slow as ever, if that made any sense at all. She felt numb to the pain, almost like it wasn't even there to begin with. She knew it was due to being in shock, but honestly, Kota preferred the numbness. She was tired of the pain. She didn't want to carry any more burden and trauma so she did the only thing she could think of in that moment going forward.

She had to put a wall up around her feelings. Just like her sister had done. Maybe Titus was right. Maybe love really was a weakness that always ended in pain. I mean, this would definitely be a good example of it. Kota grew to love her sister so much and now look what happened.

She was dead.

And Kota then began to wonder if maybe it was her fault in some way...

After all, she had been the one trying to get Lexa to make a move on the Clarke for some time. However, Titus didn't want their relationship to affect the Commander's rule, so he attempted to put an end to it by murdering the blonde, only for Lexa to end up in the crossfire.

But Dakota didn't want to think about that right now. In fact, she didn't want to think at all. She just wanted to take her mind off it, and get as far away from Polis as possible. So, as an act of a final goodbye, she raised her hand and caressed Lexa's hair while she hummed the tune of the song the older one used to sing to her whenever she was distressed.

She remembered Abby telling her that it was believed that when people die, their hearing is the last to go. So if it was possible that her sister could still hear, whether her brain processed it or not, Kota wanted to provide some form of comfort for her just like the latter always did for her in her own times of distress. Maybe it was really Kota's way of calming herself down, but if that was the case, would there really be anything wrong with that?

" Yumi na teik
Won sonraun au?
Ai keryon gyon op
Ai keryon g' breik au"

[And will you take
A life with me?
My soul moves on
My soul is freed]

Those lyrics of the song fit well in her current situation, because Lexa's soul was indeed free now. It would now move on into the afterlife, as well as the memory of the Commanders before. It sucked, but it was her unfortunate reality, and she claimed to have already accepted it within her mind. Although, she would soon realize that the idea of acceptance was a complete and utter lie.

"I must complete the ritual." Titus spoke up from beside the grieving pair. Somewhere in the room, Murphy was also there, given the fact that he was brought in by the Flamekeeper to act as a ploy in order to originally kill Clarke. However, that plan ultimately backfired, and Lexa ended up being the one to lose her life.

It was that fact alone that made Kota despise the man with every bone in her body. She knew it was an accident but if the man would have kept his cool and let Lexa live her life the way she wanted to, then the girl wouldn't be sitting motionless on that bed like she was currently in that moment.

Anger boiled inside of her, but still, she pushed it down into the deepest part of her stomach, unknowingly feeding it to her inner monster. She would deal with those feelings of grief later. Right now, all she felt was numb. The perfect feeling for having to bare through what came next.

"The Commander's spirit must be passed on." Titus claimed, gently trying to pry Clarke away from Lexa's body. "This is my purpose. You must allow me to complete the task. It is what the Commander wanted."

The blonde continued to sniffle and sob as she slowly backed away from the bed. Murphy suggested that they leave, but Clarke instantly shook her head, and instead, walked over to the other side of the bed where Kota remained in a kneeling position while staring down at her sister's body. The most violent of tears are those that are silent, and that's exactly what Kota's eyes were unleashing in that moment.

"Yu gonplei ste odon, Leksa kom Trikru." Titus restated. "Gonplei kom Heda kigon feva." [Your fight is over, Leksa kom Trikru. The Commander's fight goes on."

Dakota had to close her eyes for a moment, as the man turned Lexa to lay on her stomach, where he proceeded to use a scalpel to slice open the flesh on the back of her neck. She knew that Murphy and Clarke were in shock over the sight, but she couldn't care less about them. Instead, she quickly wiped her tears and picked up her sister's metaphorical mask of no emotion, before she put it on herself and wore it with pride as she walked out of the room, Titus following entail while carrying Lexa's body in his arms. It was then that she pushed down her feelings and grief completely, knowing that it was her time to step up. If her sister had high hopes for her, then she vowed to live up to them and more.

"The Commander is dead." Titus declared. "Let the Conclave begin."

_______

By the next nightfall, Dakota was nowhere to be found in the tower. After the incident with Lexa, she left the room with Titus and no one had heard from her since. Well, at least Clarke and Murphy hadn't. Afterall, the two of them remained locked up in the bedroom ever since the previous night's events without any way out.

"The conclave must be starting." The blonde sighed, after hearing a horn sound in the distance from her place at the balcony.

"Cool." Murphy chuckled. "You see anything?"

Clarke only looked at him dryly, clearly still caught up in her feelings about Lexa.

"Oh, come on." He continued. "What? Bunch of Grounders fighting to the death to see who gets the A.I. drilled into their brain, that doesn't sound fun to you?" He asked her, as he took her place on the balcony, clearly amused by the Grounders' ways of doing things.

His smile only faltered, once he turned around and noticed that Clarke had a far away look on her face as she stared helplessly at the blood-stained bed. She couldn't take it anymore, being stuck in the same room with Murphy and the very bed that Lexa died on, it was all too much for her. The blonde rushed over to the doors before she banged on them repeatedly, wondering where the hell Kota was, and why she decided to let Titus lock them in that room.

"Clarke!" Murphy called her name, getting her to stop her pointless acts. "Look, I'm sorry, alright? I know how much she meant to you."

"This has nothing to do with me." She replied, dismissively. "We need to make sure that Aden wins."

"What about Kota? You don't believe she could win?"

"It's not that." The blonde sighed. "Kota doesn't want to become Heda. She said so herself. I doubt she's gonna be there."

Before Murphy could say anything in return, the doors to the room finally opened, and Titus walked in with the keys in his hands.

"What, you came here to finish the job?" Murphy deadpanned, but Titus was as stoic as ever.

"No. I'm here to fulfill my vow to Lexa. Put these on." He said, handing both of them hooded coats to wear.

"Where's Dakota?" Murphy questioned the man, surprisingly concerned for the girl.

"The Commander's sister has requested to be left alone until further notice. She won't be present at the conclave tomorrow, nor will she be here to wish you a safe departure. I suggest you worry about yourselves."

His words were vague and the two teens were certainly confused. However, after receiving a somewhat decent answer, Murphy just shrugged his shoulders and started putting on his coat. Clarke, on the otherhand, remained still as she shot daggers at Titus.

"You killed your Commander." She spat, throwing him the coat back. "How are you still free?"

"I am the only Flamekeeper." He sadly replied. "Now, please. If you go now, you can slip in with the crowds arriving for tomorrow's conclave."

"You heard the man." Murphy pulled Clarke's arm. "All right, let's—"

"—I need to see Aden first." She demanded, making Titus frown.

"That's out of the question. The Natblidas [nightbloods] have already begun the purification ritual."

"That sounds kind of private, Clarke." Murphy mumbled.

"Where?" She ignored him.

_____

Before long, the three of them were walking into the room where the ritual was being held. Titus walked up to Aden, who was sprinkling red powder overtop of Lexa's covered body, and pulled the boy aside. Clarke immediately went to greet him, just as Murphy made a comment about how all of the Nightbloods in there were only kids.

"I'm sorry to disturb you." She whispered to the boy. "But I'm here to see you. You made me a promise to support my people."

"If Heda's spirit chooses me."

"Yes. Will you still?"

"We all will." He replied, motioning to the other kids in the room. "Lexa made each of us vow it. Kota too, though we already knew where she stands. We loved Lexa."

Just then, the doors opened allowing King Roan and Ontari to enter the room. The latter's eyes instantly landed on Clarke, and a fire formed in them as she ran to attack the blonde.

"YOU!" She bellowed, running towards her and pushing Aden out of the way when he tried to stop her. She quickly got ahold of her and tackled Clarke to the ground with her knife drawn.

Titus cut in and grabbed the girl's wrist, stopping her from harming the blonde. "No." He ordered her with a single word.

"Put the knife down, Ontari." Roan commanded, making her scoff.

"Your mother's dead because of her."

"You will obey your king."

Ontari sighed in frustration as she allowed Titus to rip the knife from her grasp. "An unfortunate fact we have her to thank for as well." She uttered menacingly, before standing up and glaring at the blonde. "No matter. When I am Heda and the king bows to me, you and every last member of Skaikru will die. And then after I slit her lover's throat, I will come for Leilani kom Trikru next."

➳ ➳ ➳

Things were definitely getting worse in Polis ever since the recent death of the Commander. However, things at Arkadia weren't much better either. Kane, Sinclair, and Lincoln were all involved in plotting a coup to kidnap Pike and give him to the Grounders, while also freeing the others in lockup in the process. However, they ultimately failed, resulting in them being arrested and thrown into the same confinement that the Grounders were being locked up in ever since Pike became the Chancellor.

Which was why they were all imprisoned together, when the Chancellor appeared in the holding unit to ultimately decide their fate.

"I'm not here for you." Pike instantly stated, upon noticing Kane walk up to the barrier. "I'm here for all of you." He emphasized, looking amongst the other Grounders in the confinement. "Each of you is guilty of the same crimes as Kane, and as such, you will share the same fate. Death."

The other Grounders became alarmed, because they didn't know what he was saying. However, Lincoln quickly calmed them down and walked closer to Pike.

"My people are innocent." He spoke in a hushed tone. "They know nothing. Don't let them suffer for my crimes. Please."

"Sir, Lincoln's right." Bellamy cut in. "All the others did was run through an open door. Same thing we would do if we were in there."

"I believe that's true." Pike nodded in agreement. "Kane, Lincoln, Sinclair, as the leaders of this coup, you will pay for your crimes with your lives. Execution is set for dawn."

With that last declaration, he walked out, leaving everyone speechless. All Lincoln could do while being caged in, was stare at Bellamy menacingly wondering when he was going to realize how bad of a leader Pike really was. And when Bellamy finally walked away as well, he unfortunately left Lincoln to ponder on what was going to happen to his sister when he's gone. He could only hope that she would be alright now that she had Lexa back in her life.

But if only he knew.....

_____

Later that evening, Bellamy and Monty tried to get Harper and Miller to let them in on their plans to save Lincoln, Kane, and Sinclair, knowing that they had one. They claimed that their intentions were good and they only wanted to help, however, the two guards didn't trust them anymore and Bellamy knew that. So he told Miller to have Octavia meet him at the dropship in an hour if she wanted to save Dakota's brother, and after that he let them be.

Which is what brought Octavia to where she was now. After receiving Miller's message through her earpiece, it didn't take her long to arrive at the dropship. Especially because she had recently just came back from Polis with other Grounders, so thankfully she was in range. With that being said, Octavia surely didn't trust her brother anymore either, so of course she knew that if she needed to meet up with him, then she would have to come with a plan in her back pocket.

She finally arrived at the dropship, and dismounted off of her horse. Looking around, Octavia couldn't help but be reminded of old memories, good and bad. She hadn't been back at the place that started it all in a long time. Still, she knew that she was now back there for a reason, and that reason was currently making his way over to her from his previous spot in the shadows.

"Glad you came." Bellamy was the first one to speak, while noticing that Octavia was walking very cautiously. "I'm alone, O. I'm here to help."

At his words, Octavia finally let her guard down and approached him with a tender smile. She walked closer in order to hug him, and even though Bellamy was certainly surprised at her gesture, he went to wrap his arms around her anyway.

However, it was that very gesture that allowed the brunette to have the opening she needed. Just as he was about to embrace her, Octavia raised her hand and plunged a syringe into his neck, causing him to give her a look of shock before he lost consciousness.

Bellamy's limp body fell forwards into Octavia's waiting arms, and with a smirk she began dragging him away from the dropship. "Sleep well, big brother."

______

Clarke and Murphy found themselves entering the sacred room, where Titus resided, amongst other important artifacts. The two of them soon caught his attention, as he heard the door creak open followed by their footsteps, so he quickly turned around and frowned at them.

"You do not belong here!" He bellowed.

However, all he got in return was a quick witted comment from Murphy, as the boy thought back to how the man tortured him in that very room.

"Really? Well, why is my blood decorating your floor?"

Titus only scowled as he turned back around and ignored him. "There's nothing left for you in Polis. Why have you not gone?"

"We need to talk about Ontari." Clarke stated, firmly. "She wasn't trained here. Why would you let her into the Conclave?"

"Ontari has the blood of the Commanders. It is her birthright to compete for the Flame."

"Why does it matter who wins?" Murphy whispered, so only the blonde could hear. "I mean, if you're girlfriend really is in that A.I, then we have nothing to worry about, right? Clarke, let's just get out of here while we can—"

"—It matters." Titus cut in. "I've served four Commanders as Flamekeeper. None of them half as wise or strong as Lexa kom Trikru. But the truth is, she was all those things even before ascension. The Flame deepens what's already there. If the spirit of the Commander should choose Ontari, the Ice Nation will control everything, and Skaikru will face her wrath. Dakota would have been the best fit to carry the Flame, but she refuses to become Commander. My only hope is that she will change her mind and avenge her sisters title, or find someone else who can."

Suddenly, their conversation was cut short by the sound of a muffled horn blaring in the distance.

"What's that?" Murphy questioned, and Titus was already on the move as he answered anxiously.

"The victory horn!"

All three of them rushed out and headed straight for the tower, where they proceeded to quickly reach the throne room. It was complete chaos as a crowd of people were already in there chattering amongst themselves, but Titus managed to push his way through.

"Chon teik wimplei tromon laud?!" [Who sounds the victory horn?!] He bellowed.

But his question was soon answered as he approached the Commander's throne, and saw Ontari resting comfortably on it while covered in black blood. Somewhere in the crowd, Roan managed to pull Clarke and Murphy to the side, knowing that it wasn't safe for them to stay any longer.

"What is the meaning of this?" Titus asked, with authority.

But Ontari only smirked, before reaching into the bag beside her and lifting up the decapitated head of Aden, the young boy who everyone was counting on. Everyone in the room immediately gasped in shock and pure disgust, before Ontari kicked the bag, causing the heads of all the other nightbloods to topple out onto the floor on display. And after succeeding in her little plan of demonstrating her showy and scheming ways, the girl only had two words to declare.

"I win."

➳ ➳ ➳

After what felt like hours later, Bellamy groaned in pain and finally woke up with a groggy haze clouding his vision as he came to. When it finally cleared, he was surprised to see none other than Dakota, standing directly in front of him with the most menacing expression he'd ever seen adorned on her face.

The girl had just lost her sister by the hands of an executioner, she was internally distraught and grieving already. She didn't want to have to witness the same fate for her brother, when all she wanted to do was allow him to hold and comfort her. Kota was absolutely furious with both