──twenty six

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twenty six.








"LUCAS WILLIAM POTTER! I'M TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW, IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR ARSE IN HERE RIGHT THIS MINUTE, I WILL TAKE OUT THE TELLY IN YOUR ROOM."

"Calm down, James," Olivia says with a roll of her eyes, having enough of his screaming.

James ignores her. "Lucas! I'm telling─"

"I'm here!" The eleven year old cuts off with a roll of his eyes, running down the stairs clad in his Christmas onesie.

The Potter family had decided against their traditional christmas gala this year and had favored to stay in instead. However, everyone had woken up with red, Christmas pajamas by the foot of their beds courtesy of Euphemia.

"Did you really need ten minutes to fix your hair?" James asked the boy as he led him to the living where everyone else is.

"Leave him alone, James," Olivia scolds as she scoots over to give Lucas space. The little boy was quick to lean onto her, letting Olivia run her hands through his mass of curly hair.

James rolls his eyes playfully as he takes Lucas' other side. "You're spoiling him."

Olivia raises an eyebrow. "Am I? Was I the one who gave him another slice of cake last night after he already brushed his teeth?"

James and Lucas shared a look considering that both of them had promised each other not to tell the pregnant lady.

"James!" Euphemia scolded, having heard the conversation. "You gave Lucas cake after I specifically told you not to anymore?"

The seventeen year old awkwardly cleared his throat as he avoided both women's eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Olivia shook her head in disappointment. "You're despicable. And you had the nerve to accuse me of spoiling him."

"He said it'd be his last then he'd go to sleep," James tried to reason. "What was a suppose to do? Not give it to him?"

"Yes!" Olivia and Euphemia told him simultaneously.

"Well, at least we know who'll be the strict parent," Lily commented.

"Can we open the presents now?" Lucas whined, having enough of the adults' conversation. "Please?"

Olivia was truly becoming amazed with how much has changed in Lucas' personality, further proof what a healthy home does to a child.

"Alright," Olivia allows him. "you can open two right now, but to save the rest for tonight so you can still open some when Kat gets here later."

Truth be told, the Christmas tree was full of presents for Lucas. There were big and small, toys and books, and basically everything Fleamont, Euphemia, James and Olivia thought he would like. They made sure his first Christmas with his first, real family was perfect.

Lucas, as expected, grabbed the biggest one and quickly unwrapped it to show a custom made, top of the line broomstick, one that was obviously from James.

Lucas' face was in pure awe as he traced the elegantly hand carved words on the handle. Lucas W. Potter.

However, as soon as he was able to recover from his surprise, he was quick to throw himself at James for a tight hug. "Thank you!"

James chuckled as he hugged the boy back just as tight. "You're always welcome, Bambi."

"Enough with the heartfelt father and son moment," Sirius interrupted a with a smile on his face. "Open this next."

Lucas gratefully accepted the two gifts, one that was obviously a book and a medium sized box. Upon ripping the wrapping paper, it was revealed to be a brand new camera and a green and maroon scrapbook. "Thank you, pads!"

Sirius gave a genuine smile as he reached over to ruffle the boy's hair. "Make sure to show me when you start taking pictures."

"Alright! Enough gifts for now," Fleamont announces. "The food is ready."

James pulled Olivia to her feet as everyone else headed for the table. "I'm kinda actually very in love with you. You know that right?"

A smile broke into her face as she raised an eyebrow. "You are? Good for you, I'm also kinda actually very in love with you."

James plants a kiss on her temple before pulling the chair for her. "Good, because I plan to keep you forever."

β‹…β€’β‹…β€’β‹…βŠ°βˆ™βˆ˜β˜½ΰΌ“β˜Ύβˆ˜βˆ™βŠ±β‹…β€’β‹…β€’β‹…

OLIVIA KINSLEY DESPISES MISTLETOES.

It had nothing to do with the person she's currently stuck with and more into the fact that she feels suffocated to be so close to someone especially with her very much pregnant belly taking all the space.

James and Lily had tried to get them out but there's simply no going around it. Truthfully, Olivia had been more than willing to give that one tiny kiss just to get out. James, too, was okay with it, but it was Lily, whom Olivia is currently stuck with, that refuses. Instead the redhead had asked their friends to look for a spell to get them out and Olivia had played along with it. She never wanted any of her friends to do something they're not comfortable with and Lily definitely seems very uncomfortable with the idea of them sharing one, tiny kiss, but Olivia has had enough.

The smell of the leftover roast chicken that James had heated up for her before this whole thing began calls her name and she feels herself watering at the sight of the very appetizing food as she seconds past.

"Lily, please," she whined again. "Let's just get this over with."

Lily, who had sat on the floor by Olivia's feet, bit her lip as she continued to flip through the pages of the book Kat had given her. "I'm sure there's a spell in here."

"It's just a kiss," Olivia tries to reason again. "A simple peck. Please, Lily, I'm so hungry."

Lily shook her head, red hair falling to her face like curtains of fire. "You have a boyfriend."

"And the boyfriend says it's fine," James says from outside the circle the two girls are in. "I really don't mind, Evans."

They didn't understand. They don't understand why Lily refused to do it. They don't know how much it would hurt. They don't know how it would hurt for Olivia to kiss her then run back to James' arms like nothing ever happened. They don't understand that it would do nothing but add wood to the fire she's trying to extinguish.

And they don't know how much Lily wants to do it, to feel Olivia's lips against hers even for the tiniest moment, but she knows she couldn't. That one forsaken kiss would only cause her to fall deeper into the hole she had been trying to climb out of.

"Look, Lilipad," James says again. "If you're worried about what I might feel or think, don't. I fully trust you."

Lily wanted to tell him that he shouldn't. He shouldn't be trusting her so much with his girlfriend. She wants to tell him that there's nothing in this world she wants more than to snatch Olivia, to hold her, to be loved by her.

"Please, Lily," Olivia begs again. "Let's just get over this so I can start eating."

"Yeah, Lils," Sirius agrees from the sofa where he, Kat, Peter and Remus have already started eating their heated leftover snacks from the Christmas dinner. "Don't deprive the pregnant woman of her food."

"It's not a big deal," Olivia tells her. "It'll be just two people touching each other with their lips to get out of this damn circle. It won't mean anything."

And that was the problem. Lily wanted it to mean something.

"Fine," the redhead finally gave in upon seeing Olivia longingly looking at the roast chicken she's been eyeing.

"Hallelujah!" James cheered as he dramatically threw his hands up.

Lily rolled her eyes as she pulled herself up from the ground and faced Olivia. Suddenly, it felt as if her heart began beating at such a speed she couldn't keep up with. She felt her hands begin to sweat and hear her heartbeat against her ears.

This was it. What she's always dreamed of, but it was so wrong. Lily never wanted it to go this way. She had dreamed of a perfect scenario where Olivia didn't feel forced to kiss her, where she truly wanted to.

But when Olivia's lips touched hers, all thoughts in her mind suddenly disappeared. It was soft and only lasted half a second, only enough till the invincible barrier trapping them in disappeared but Lily loved it all the same.

Suddenly, she felt thankful. Thankful that even though she'd be spending perhaps the rest of her life watching the girl she's in love with be in love with someone else, she knows the feeling of her lips and that was enough.

Lily realized that it was a goodbye kiss. A goodbye to the feelings she should have buried long ago.

β‹…β€’β‹…β€’β‹…βŠ°βˆ™βˆ˜β˜½ΰΌ“β˜Ύβˆ˜βˆ™βŠ±β‹…β€’β‹…β€’β‹…

THERE WAS NOT A MOMENT IN HER LIFE WHERE OLIVIA HAD FELT HAPPIER.

She has a boyfriend who loves her, friends who cared and looked after her, a new family who accepted her, and two beautiful babies on the way. Everything was perfect. It had felt perfect and so she doesn't understand why she's feeling what she's currently feeling now.

A part of her was sad. It remained sad no matter how loud her laugh got or how wide her smile had become. She's content with how her life had turned out, but Olivia knows there's still something missing.

It was then that she realized that the part that remained miserable is the part still currently mourning, reminding her that once upon a time, she was a part of two halves.

She's being reminded that a part of her soul has been teared away, that no matter how happy she could be or how perfect her life can become, she will only ever be half of who she could have been. Something would always be missing.

It was an unimaginable type of grief. The type where you feel you're okay, you've moved on, but how can you move on from losing the other half of you? You feel as if you can live your life now, days will pass and you're happy but then it will creep in, that sadness Olivia can never truly shake off.

And so ten minutes before Christmas ends, Olivia finds herself leaving her friends and rummaging through her trunk, hands clutched around the leather bound journal that brought both pain and relief.

She needed to feel Maxwell again, even if just through his thoughts. She needed to mourn again, even for only a moment, then she could go back to being happy. She can go back to her friends and smile once more, but for now, she'd mourn.


December 25, 1974

Christmas was supposed to be happy events, one where you can spend time with your family and simply enjoy being alive, but I've always hated it. All it does is remind me I have no mother to cook my favorite meal and no father to teach me how to cut a tree. All it does is force me and Olivia back in the place we hate, with the people we hate and it's no different this year.

The day had started like many others, with a house elf shaking me awake and me whining to Olivia as soon as her eyes opened because she had once again hogged all the damn blankets. She likes to stay in my room when we're back in the manor and I like to keep her close. No matter how beautiful, this place is dangerous. We seek comfort in each other as we always do.

Though I would thoroughly appreciate it if she'd just stop stealing the entire fucking blankets and not let me freeze the entire night.

We'd spend the entire day playing nice, not making eye contact throughout dinner and keeping our answers short and dry so as to not raise any more questions then Olivia and I would open our presents. They give us a book each year, one that's more tiresome than Binn's lessons, but we would smile and say thank you anyway.

I would then read the letters Regulus sent me. We send one to each other daily when we're not in Hogwarts, if only to be sure that we're both alive despite the miserable houses we're currently stuck in, but this particular night, I was lacking in ink and I knew I'd be able to get more in the study. My parents didn't mind that I talk to Regulus. In fact, they encourage it, knowing that his blood is as pure as ours. They had no idea of the hatred we share for their beliefs.

I hadn't meant to hear them, but I knew I should have kept walking when I did. I'm glad I didn't. They talked in harsh whispers but I heard enough to understand. I shouldn't have listened, but I'm glad I have.

"They have his eyes," father said. "He'd be pleased if his children looked like him."

I knew then that they were talking about us. It was no secret that Olivia and I hadn't inherited the icy blues everyone in our family shares. Instead our irises are colored a cloudy grey.

"Hush, Martin," mother scolded harshly. "They're your children."

Even without seeing them, I knew father's face held a sneer. "No, they're his children."

I couldn't describe the happiness I felt then, to know that I am not related to this monster. I have never felt relief as I do then.

"Tom Riddle," father said bitterly. "Such a mudblood name."

"Have respect, Martin," Mother scolded once again. "You would be killed if anyone hears you. We both agreed. It's our service to the dark lord."

"He'd kill me for providing for his bastard children? For putting clothes on their backs and food on their plate?"

I left then, having already heard what I needed to, but there was a certain skip in my steps. I was elated and I wanted to share my happiness to Olivia, to tell her we're not related to Martin Kinsley, that we have a different father out there, perhaps a different family, but I knew I couldn't give her that hope.

I would first learn about Tom Riddle, our father.








AUTHOR'S NOTE:

ngl i feel like my writing just
get's worse with each chapter
but I'm determined to finish
this story.

this chapter is so packed whoa
but I really wanted to add Olivia's
sudden sadness over Maxwell bc
I feel like I've ignored that
considering that whole event
shapes Olivia's character.

also Lily and Olivia kissed uwu
but also Olivia is apparently
Voldemort's kid? Whoops definitely
didn't see that one coming

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