Otto was still not mad at JJ, he didn't have to have his childhood - or the sliver there was left of it - tainted by a baby. Otto made the choice to have the baby, and he chose to not be apart of that.

That was all fine. Completely okay.

But what was not completely fine and okay was that JJ had tried to dictate what Otto did with her body, the baby was growing inside of her and thus she had the final say of what to do with it.

She had seen a new side to the seemingly light-hearted boy she thought she knew, in that moment he was completely consumed by anger. It was pouring out of every pore of his body, every word that tumbled last his lips was thick of malice and hatred.

He had a way of saying things that made the most impact. It was like he was going out of his way and picking his words very carefully so they would have maximum effect, he came for every aspect of a teenage parent.

But, Otto didn't really care.

After Wes she was essentially turned off emotionally.

She walked away almost umbothered, she wasn't hurt at all, just angry at the fact men thought they got a say over what women did to their bodies.

But that was it.

She, like most women, had enough of men trying to make choices for women. They spoke about women like they owned them, like they were property, something able to be controlled. Something you could buy and sell, renovate or refurnish, something you fill up with people or leave abandoned.

And the pot smoking, crime commiting, borderline school drop out that was JJ Maybank thought he had better decision making skills than Otto.

She assumed it was because he was a man.

After Otto left the rest of the group went from confused to putting the pieces together.

JJ didn't return leaving them to ponder.

The rumours. The avoidance. The fight.

It all began to click in their mind's, the rumous were true.

Otto was pregnant, and JJ must've been the father if he was so furious. Not to mention Otto's reluctance to go to the Chateau.

They worked that out quite quickly, the part the couldn't work out was when. The pair were introduced a few days into the school year, plus she quickly got into a relationship with Wes. They deduced it must've been recent, in the last few weeks.

They were wrong. Very wrong.

Otto was almost half way through her pregnancy.

Those clothes everyone wondered if they where hiding a baby bump were completely correct.

She had begun to show, it wasn't crazy just a little something that wasn't there before. With the rumours people would've noticed.

Otto got back to her house, while walking in she slammed the door behind her a little too hard.

She was in a bad mood, to say the least.

Hormones and men weren't a good combination.

At the sound of the front door slamming shut that reverberated through the entire house Laura got up from the kitchen where she was preparing dinner. She walked into the foyer and got a look at Otto as she walked toward the staircase.

"What's the matter?" She asked, a tea towel still in hand.

Otto didn't look over at her mother, "I really don't want to talk about it." She said.

Not only was she cross at what JJ did, but she was cross at what Kie did.

Surely if she knew Otto was consciously avoiding the Chateau she knew she shouldn't have tricked her to go there. Kie didn't have a clue what was going on in her friend's life, she didn't know how serious the matter was but she still didn't have a right to do that.

Otto didn't know how much she was clinging to the idea of a group of friends, she was trying to fill the void left by John B and Sarah.

She was trying to fix it with new friends, and Otto fit into the dynamic perfectly which meant Kie couldn't let her slip out.

Because then there would be a bigger hole.

Once walking all the way up to her room she jumped onto her bed, face smooshed into the silky covers.

She screamed, just a little.

When she was a child her parents decided it was wise to put her in therapy, she never really spoke about her dad and his health so they wanted to give her a safe space that she could talk about it with judgement - not that they would've judged her.

At the therapy sessions Otto said that sometimes she just felt like she needed to scream, even as a little kid she had all these emotions that she didn't know what to do with.

She obviously didn't do drugs as an eight-year-old but she had a habit of kicking things, mainly the outside of the shed.

Her parents would wonder were she disappeared to every so often, but she'd always be back before they could properly search for her.

Then, while gardening Laura saw a little Otto storming down the garden, in her little yellow overalls that had daisies stitched all across it, wearing her green wellies. Her fists were clenched by her sides and she had a screwed up face that Laura knew meant she was mad.

Her father had told her that she wasn't allowed to have a crocodile as a pet, and that she wasn't even allowed to go to a zoo and pet one.

She turned the corner which was hidden from the house, and Laura watched as she kicked and kicked and kicked the wall.

It wasn't the worst way Otto could've expressed her anger so Laura never mentioned it, but when she put Otto into therapy she told the therapist.

The therapist told her whenever she wanted to scream that she should do so into a pillow. Gently trying to steer her away from kicking walls.

While it wasn't terrible, it also wasn't great.

After her throat started to hurt and her lungs began to burn she stopped, turning her head to the side she looked out of the window. After the decently long walk the sun had almost set.

She'd stopped kicking things after she broke her toes, the thought of doing it made her cringe and think back to the morning after it happened when she looked down at her swollen, black and blue coloured foot.

Laura knew the story about how she tripped out some stairs was absolute bullshit, ever since she saw Otto that morning she would see her walking outside and then a muffled kicking sound every so often.

Laura straight up asked her if she kicked a wall. Otto begrudgingly said yes.

Otto had to give it to the Outer Banks, their sunsets were something else entirely.

Otto went to therapy for a few years, but eventually she began to clam up. She began to learn that she shouldn't trust people.

Even thought HIPPA and all that was crucial she still didn't trust the therapist.

After a few sessions where the pair essentially sat in silence Laura asked Otto if she wanted to go, to which Otto said no.

She probably should've kept going, it may have changed the outcome of her current situation.

Maybe she wouldn't be so dependent on drugs, maybe she wouldn't feel the need to bottle up every emotion for fear of someone seeing through her.

Or maybe she'd still be the same.

That she'd never know.

•

I used to kick walls as a child lmao. I stopped after I scratched off the skin in the end of my toe :,)

My mum almost certainly knew I was doing it, I'm really not a subtle person haha.