⤷ EPISODE ONE [✓]
c h a p t e r ' o n e : i'm full of unsaid words.

⊱⋆⊰

"Fuck my life so bad."

Osamu stared at the ceiling, eyes bloodshot red and tear stains on his cheeks.

Sorrow and Regret.

Is what he is currently feeling right now.

If only they didn't fight, if only he wasn't a petty bitch who refused to hear him out on his side of the story, if only I didn't tell him to get out, if only..

If only he were alive right now.

So many thoughts were racing through his head, and there were so many words he could have told his beloved.

"Fuck" Osamu cursed out while angrily ruffling his hair. He took a one quick look at the ceiling before bursting into tears again.

"Fuck my life so much, I hate myself so much why am I such a fucking asshole—" he continued to sob, "Please just take me instead, take me instead of him!" He screamed into the pillow, full of anger laced into his voice.

"I can't take this anymore, I want to die. Why am I like this? Why do I have to be born like this?" He continued to babble, his face straight into the pillow.

All Osamu wanted to do is rip his skin out for being such a bitch.

"Please.. please.. I'm begging you, just take me back to when I was in high school." He sobbed out one last time.

His whole mental breakdown was soon interrupted by the constant ringing from his phone.

He slowly turned his head to look at his vibrating phone, struggling to read whoever was calling him.

In a swift movement, he quickly snatched his phone from the nightstand. It was Atsumu who was calling him.

Now, Osamu would usually just decline the call especially in his current state but decided to answer him anyway.

"H-Hello.." Osamu voiced out into his phone, trying not to sound like he was just crying.

"Finally! God, I was so worried about you! Ya didn't answered any of my calls.." his brother exclaimed.

He paused for a moment, swiping down from the summit of his phone. He was greeted with 32 missed calls, all of them from Atsumu alone.

"Fuck, 'm sorry.. I didn't noticed any of yer calls.. I was—"

"No, don't apologize please, I recently just heard what happened with Kita-san.." he paused for a moment, and eventually continued to trail of into his sentence.

"I'm sorry for your loss, I really am. And I don't mean to trigger ya or anything, I get how you feel right now, in fact, I know what yer feeling right now. 'm sorry for spamming you a bunch of calls, I was really worried that ya might.."

"Might..?"

"Harm yourself over it.. ya know?"

Osamu was surprised for a moment, but then remembered that they are brothers. Of course they have to look out for each other even if they 'hate' each other.

"Thanks.. for checking out on me, really appreciate it" Osamu smiled through his tears.

He doesn't know what to say other than 'appreciate' but he was glad that his brother is still looking out for him.

Atsumu sighed, "Have ya eaten dinner yet?"

"Mhm.." Osamu lied, he doesn't really feel like eating right now.

"Hey even if yer not hungry, just eat a little at least. I'll come over tomorrow alright? I don't want ya to suffer all alone." Atsumu worriedly spoke.

"Okay"

"Goodnight, get some proper sleep and love ya!"

"Love ya too" Atsumu ended the call.

Osamu felt a sense of comfort from his brother's words, which made his day a bit better.

He placed his phone on the night stand, and laying down flat into his bed.

"I hope that I'll really go back to my younger self and meet him again, maybe I'll still have my chance in saving him."

And he eventually dozed off.

𓇢𓆸

Next day rolled around, the sun hits Osamu's face making him flip his whole body into another position to avoid the brightness.

"SAMU!" He jolted up awake from the sudden yell coming from outside of his room. It was an oddly familiar voice..

'Ah, Tsumu already arrived' he mentally said to himself.

"Tsumu?" He softly called out,

"GET YER ASS DOWN HERE! WE'RE GONNA BE LATEE!"

"MIYA ATSUMU! Don't say such vulgar words in this household!" A woman yelled.

"SORRY MOM!"

'Wait' Osamu quickly got up from his bed, observing his surroundings. Figurines scattered on the floor,  lots of comic books neatly placed in shelves, 2 study desks (one was messy, filled with a lot of items and the other neatly organized) and another bed close to the door.

It was him and his twin's room from 1st year of high school.

"What the fuck?!"

fin