Aries: What Taylor Swift song do reptiles love? Snake it off.
Taurus: The lemonade loved baseball, it was a great pitcher.
Gemini: Asthma takes my breath away.
Cancer: There's a new type of broom out, it's sweeping the nation.
Leo: Did you hear about the boy that got hit with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

Virgo: What kind of property does the creator of Doritos own? A cool ranch.
Libra: I had a poker themed party, I had a full house.
Scorpio: How did Harry Potter get down the hill? By walking. JK Rowling
Sagittarius: I really have a photographic memory, I just haven't developed it yet.
Capricorn: What street do ghosts live on? Dead ends.
Aquarius: I just started reading this book on antigravity. It's impossible to put down.
Pisces: What band was created by two married scientists? My Chemical Romance.