Chapter 6: sᴛɪʟʟ ʜᴜʀᴛ

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Hope floats away

If you could spend a day in my shoes

Your mind would change

If you knew what I've gone through

We want the same (Yeah, we do)

Maybe then you'd understand

How it hurts to be human (No)

"Hurts 2B Human": Pink

Q: Do you have someone in your life that is your rock?

For the past four days I've tried to contact Sarah and ask her about my car. She never picked up and I was worried and annoyed at the same time.

It wasn't the first time she ignored my calls.

I desperately needed my car because I had to go to my cousin's house on the weekend and the taxi fee was driving me crazy. I could not walk everywhere much less there.

So in my desperate state I got brave and did what probably shouldn't but that was my only choice.

After the fourth tone he answered "Hello?" His voice was hoarse which meant that he was probably asleep and I woke him up which made me feel bad.

"Hi, um...it's me Katherine, I'm sorry that I woke you up!" I heard a big sigh and I felt worse. I woke him up and he was not happy.

"No, it's fine. What can I do for you?" He answered but his tone was flat, clearly not excited to help me. Did I annoy him as much as I annoy my mom?

A lump was forming in my throat. I was still not over my fight with my mom.

She didn't even call to see if I was alright. I meant nothing to her.

"I'll be quick. Did Sarah come to the track these past days?" There was silence for a while and I thought for a moment that he hung up.

"Why?" He asked with a harsh tone.

"I need to talk to her"

"What makes you think that I know where she is?" His accusatory tone was harsh and it stung.

Okay, this is clearly going nowhere. I was tired and still feeling like shit. Him talking like that was not helping.

I was not in the mood nor did I have the strength to keep talking.

It was clear that I was a bother to him too. I took a deep breath and did what I knew wouldn't hurt anymore.

"Right. Thank you, have a nice day" With that I hung up without giving him a chance to answer.

Was that rude? Yes it was. But I just couldn't keep a conversation like that.

His attitude made me feel like I was talking to my mom and I hated it. I needed time to heal and him answering like that did not help.

After a few minutes he called back but I rejected the call. If he was going to yell at me for being rude I was not ready. I'm being a coward I know but I'm just too hurt. It's still too fresh.

A few hours later I received a call and when I saw it was my sister I felt relieved. At least she was alright.

"Sarah, where were you?" I asked.

"Angel, why are you ignoring my calls?" I froze. They were together. Why does it hurt?

"If Sarah is there tell her to bring me back the car today, I need it urgently" I answered with a flat tone and ignoring his question.

"Are you ignoring me Angel?" He asked, amused. Is he playing with me? Am I a game to him because I'm not in the mood nor did I want to play.

"Tell her I'll be waiting for her at the gas station by 5pm" I felt like the conversation was being one sided.

"Now I'm getting upset Angel, you're obviously ignoring me!" This time his tone turned serious.

"Good, I'll take that you will pass the message. Goodbye!" I said and again hung up.

As I said before I hate confrontations but I hate being played even more.

My stupid mind thought for a second that maybe what he told me that night was right. That he wasn't into my sister.

This only proves my initial thought. It will always be my sister. It will always be her and maybe my mom was right.

How could a guy like him look at someone like me?

That hug for sure meant nothing to him but I was sincere. I wasn't thinking of it as a love interest but rather as the beginning to a friendship.

But his harsh tone and him calling from my sister phone confirmed everything I needed to know. Even in a possible friendship I'll still be number two.

A thought came to my mind. Was he with her the first time I dialed his number? Most probably yes. That's why he was not happy. I must have disturbed whatever they were doing.

But it's none of my business. I'll stay away this time. I won't get hurt again. My mom did enough.

.....

At 5pm I saw my sister. Fortunately she was alone and I felt relieved. I wasn't sure that I could face Zane now.

"Shit sis, you look like shit!" She laughed when she got out of the car.

I nodded without saying anything.

I got into the car and before driving away I said "I'm out of town for a few days. Don't call me because I won't be able to come and stay out of trouble"

"You sound like mom Kat, I'll be fine, I always am". I nodded and started the car. When I left the gas station my heart sank.

From the side mirror I could see Zane's car getting into the gas station. He was clearly there to pick her up.

Why does it hurt? It shouldn't. We're nothing.

You're pathetic Katherine. Always having expectations. You knew from the beginning there was no chance for him to look at you. That's right.

I was still driving when someone called me. I put the caller on speaker and my whole face lit up when I heard his voice.

"Good day pumpkin! How are you? I've missed you a lot!" My dad's happy voice made me smile.

"I've been well dad! I missed you too!" I did, we didn't speak often because he was in a rehab center and they didn't allow him to do many calls.

"Pumpkin! I called to tell you that I'm getting discharged next week! I'm finally free!" I could imagine him jumping in excitement.

"Really? No way!! I'm so happy dad, I truly am. It was about time!" And I really was happy. He's been there for the past 4 years and I couldn't wait to meet him.

My dad made bad choices but he's been nothing but sweet for the past years and I felt like he really got better. It felt like I finally got my father back. My rock.

"Do you know when exactly?" I asked.

"Wednesday...Look, pumpkin I have to go. My time is up. I'll talk to you another day!"

"Sure dad, take care!"

"You too!" He then hung up.

I suddenly had a plan and I smiled at myself for the genius idea. I'll give him a surprise.

I really can't wait to see him soon. I need him a lot right now. We could probably look for an apartment together and live like a family. A family of two unfortunately. 

He won't treat me like mom...

..................

It's shorter than I anticipated but I'll make it up to you by giving you Zane's POV. You probably hate him now but you'll understand later!


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