28. Opening Up

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It's a quarter to eleven and Saturday morning. Harry was right about me regretting drinking so much because this hangover is definitely taking its toll on me.

I look to the left of me to find Harry still asleep. I can't help but stare at the man who looks so much younger than he actually is with his curls pushed onto his forehead and eyes peacefully closed.

"Like what you see, Ella?" He says with his eyes still closed. I quickly look away and then back to him to see his eyes now open and his lips turning up into a smug grin.

"How did you know?"

"I know everything." He leans forward and presses a kiss to my forehead. "What do you want for breakfast? I'm ducking out to go buy a green juice."

"Green juice?"

"It's apart of my diet for training. It has all my vitamins in it." He stands up and he still has just his Calvin Kleins on. It's hard to look away when there is such a beauty infront of me. He smiles at me and dimples form on his two cheeks. I love when he smiles with teeth and his eyes slightly shut due to him smiling so hard. Just this look alone makes me want to tell him everything that he's ever wanted to know. I know so much about his past, but never had the courage to tell him about mine.

"Harry." I catch his attention as he slips on his shirt and jeans. "Never mind."

"Tell me." He walks over to me and I sit up. He sits on the edge of the bed next to me and wraps his arms around me, kissing my temple. "You can tell me anything El."

"I know." I snuggle into him. "Which is why I am ready to tell you everything. I'm ready to tell you why I am the way I am with trust issues, against swearing and violence and why I am so afraid of falling for someone."

"Are you sure you're ready? I don't want to pressure you into anything."

"I'm ready." I untangle his arms from around me and turn my body so that I am facing him. His green eyes stare into my hazel ones and just the look alone melts my heart. How is he so beautiful?

"I was sixteen and he was twenty. I dropped out of school and was a lonely girl. My life was turned upside down until him. He made me feel happiness again, he gave me a life. I was living in a foster home with drunks. They didn't care for me so I escaped them. I moved in with him and he let me live with him. After six months I fell helplessly in love with him. He made me so happy Harry and he was my world. I loved him so much I gave myself to him. He made me feel so good and he was so caring and gentle."

"I would cook for him and clean his house and care for his necessitates and he would give me love, shelter and food. We had dated for a year and a half and I honestly thought he was the guy I was going to marry. Then his mother died and he was heart broken. I cut all ties with the limited friends I had, which were mostly guys because he told me life was better just him and I."

"I was so stupid that I did as he said and cut off ties with everyone. I did as he said because he no longer had anyone but me in his life and I wanted it to be just him and I. What I didn't realise was how much of a drunk and drug addict he was. He was constantly drunk and high on drugs and I had to deal with him. It started off with mental abuse and he would say that I am nothing without him and how I should be grateful for him because of how he took me in when no one wanted me."

"His words were so hurtful that I would cry for hours and when he sobered up he would apologise and blame his alcohol. I tried to leave him but he was a mess and begged for my help so I stayed. I had no one or no where to go to anyway. That's when his mental abuse turned to physical. He use to ask me to give him so much sex and my young body couldn't handle it. He would put me through so much pain and I was so afraid he would hurt me if I didn't give him what he wanted so I did everything he said. He would tie me up and make love to me without consent. I couldn't do anything."

"It got to the point where he stopped feeding me and left me tied up for days straight because he got off over me struggling. It then turned even more physical and he started beating me. He was raping me, verbally abusing me and beating me up. For months there was not a day where I hadn't bled to the point I passed out."

I stop talking and take a few breaths. I can feel tears in my eyes but I don't cry. I have cried enough over here and promised myself that I wouldn't no more.

Harry has a few tears strolling down his cheeks and he wipes them away with his hand. His eyes turn from bright green to dark and he looks beyond mad. He rakes his hands through his hair and pulls on the ends. He is so mad.

"I feel sick. What he did to you Ella is indescribable and I can't even put into words how angry I am. You can't let him get away with this you need to tell the police or something. If i ever see this guy so help me I will kill-"

"Harry stop." I put my hand on his and rub circles on it to calm him down. "I honestly want to just forget about it altogether, getting the police involved will only make things worse."

"I'm sorry. Continue"

"He told me that if I tried to run away no one would believe me because I'm just a little girl. He was so much older than me and stronger than me. I tried to escape so many times and that ended badly for me. When I turned eighteen I got a job."

"I wasn't earning much money at all and he would take most of it from me for drugs. I use to have to do drug runs for him and without him knowing I would steal hundreds of the thousands of dollars he got. I soon got another job so that I was earning a fair amount each week. I felt awful for steeling his money but technically it was mine since he made me do the drug runs for him."

"A year after working my two jobs I was nineteen and I escaped from him. He was cheating on me with other girls and I knew it but I couldn't do anything about it. He would still abuse me in every way and rape me, but not as much as he used to. He went away for a week with this girl. Before that he would put handcuffs on different spots around to house."

"I knew he was planning on cuffing me in those places so one night before he went away for that week he was putting ropes all over the kitchen sink with cuffs. I slipped a pocket knife that he had in his second draw and a wrench into the pocket of my pants. A wrench; I know I seem crazy but I am so proud of myself for thinking ahead The following day he tied me up and cuffed me to the kitchen sink with limited food and water."

"He told me not to escape because I wouldn't be able to and if I ever did he had connections and would find me. I managed to escape with limited injuries. That wrench and pocket knife saved my life. I used the limited amount of makeup I had purchased over the years to cover all my bruises and I checked into a hotel. I dyed my short hair dark brown instead of the blonde hair I used to have and booked a ticket here to New York."

"I had some money saved up from over the years to buy a dump of an apartment as that's all I could afford as it was low rent per week. I got a job at a news agency and after being there for a year I wrote articles for the paper and the owner knew I had a talent. I still keep in contact with her today, she was like a mother to me although no one could ever replace my mother. I opened up to her about my past and she supported me. It made me feel better telling someone about it."

"Her ex husband is Tony Hawk, my boss today and she got me an internship there. I have worked there for three years now and scored a position in that company. I began to earn a lot more money so I brought a much nicer apartment which was near where I worked. I brought myself a car and I met Taylor, Zayn and Perrie his girlfriend as well as other people that I worked with."

"Now here I am today still scarred from the monster he was, but I am across the country from him and a different person. I don't know if he is still alive or not, but I don't care about him. I am trying my best to clear my memory and I am slowly recovering. My heart is starting to mend and when I met you, you have helped me forget."

"Ella." He pulls me into a hug. "You are honestly the strongest person I have ever known. I will never hurt you and I will never let anyone lay a finger on you to hurt you like he did. I will protect you and I will do everything I can to fix your heart and help you forget."

"Thank you Harry."

"I am so proud of you El."

"Thank you." I manage to let out a laugh. I needed to laugh, especially after speaking about him and my horrid past. "We are just two broken people who are gluing each other together piece by piece."

"And I will not stop trying to glue that big heart of yours until it is back together again." He leans forward and kisses me. I never knew how much I had missed his lips until he kissed me again.

"And now you know that I'm not a virgin." I laugh.

"Elouise, that isn't something to laugh about."

"It is Harry, because now you won't always be so gentle with me. I may have been drunk last night, but I still remember you asking me every five seconds if I am okay and if I want you to stop you would have."

"I was just being a gentlemen."

"That's real gentlemen like, fingeri-"

"Alright be quiet, I'm going to get us some breakfast." He stands up and kisses the top of my head before leaving. I stand up and go into the bathroom and turning on the shower. I remember coming in here and turning it off at some time this morning after Harry and I were finished having our little bit of fun.

On the bathroom floor is his shirt that he wore under his blazer last night. After my shower I put it on as it smells like Harry and lets be honest, it looks quite good on me. The white button up, collared shirt stops mid thigh. I can't wait to see Harry's reaction when he comes back with our breakfast.

A/N: So now you know why Ella is the way she is. Some of you could probably sense this coming, but you can't blame her for being the way that she is.

Also, you can call this self promo, but I have some other fanfics that I write. So if you are looking for things to read I have some ones involving Harry that I have written. Some have been for a while and some are just starting out.

Thank you for reading. x

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