WHY?

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XAVIER'S POV

Lucas wasn't home yet. He must be hanging with his so called friends.

To be honest I don't like his friends.

They get involved in illegal activities like underground fighting and smuggling of drugs.

I wouldn't be surprised if Lucas took drugs too.

From his face I could say that he did take drugs on a daily basis.

I don't understand why.

If he continues to take drugs then the repercussions won't be good.

I was currently in my room.

I was waiting for him. I can't wait anymore.

I have to ask him why? Why did he do what he did?

All these years he has been hiding that he tried to kill himself.

But why? Why would he try to kill himself?

I am angry and confused at the same time.

Being jealous of me couldn't be the only reason why he did that. Could it?

He tried to kill himself.

These words were still circling in my head.

A part of me felt guilty. Because he tried to kill himself because of me.

I heard footsteps and I knew that was him.

Our rooms were on the second floor and nobody came to our floor but us at this time of the day.

It was way past midnight.

He was late. Was he with his so called friends?

I have to say that they definitely are a bad influence on him.

I built up the courage to go to his room and confront him about everything.

I was nervous.

I don't even know why. He has made my life a living hell for me. So I shouldn't be nervous or scared.

I took a deep breath and knocked on his door.

"Go away mom. I'm in no mood to talk." He said in a grumpy voice.

Was he high?

I shook my head and knocked again and said "It's me not mom."

There was silence on his side for good two minutes.

The door creaked open and he waved at me to come in.

I took a deep breath and went inside.

His room was quite decent.

To be honest I haven't seen his room in years.

I sat down on his bed while he settled down in the bean bag.

He looked at me confusingly and asked "So what brings you here?"

"Look I want to talk about everything. Like everything" I said and didn't forget to emphasize the words everything.

"Everything meaning the thing which happened today with Jackie" he smirked.

That angered me.

If he starts with her again I swear to god I will do something which I will regret later.

"I'm not here to talk about her. And I am warning you for the last time that stay away from my girl. You go near her again and I will beat you up good this time."

He raised his hands up in surrender.

"Chill out bro" he smirked.

"So tell me what do you mean by everything?"

He was acting so clueless.

"About how you manipulated our mother into hating me and how you tried to kill yourself." I said seriously.

He tensed.

"Did she tell you about it?" He was getting angry.

Why?

"What if she did? What are you gonna do about it?" I pushed.

"She had no right to tell you that." He growled.

"Why? It's my right to know. After all we are twins. And not only that you tried to kill yourself because of me! So I want to know why? Why would you do such a stupid thing to yourself? To us?"

He stood up and looked me in the eyes.

"So what if I tried to kill myself? It's not like you ever gave a shit about me. You and dad both were the same. Dad never paid any attention to me. For him you were everything. You were the best for him. He totally forgot about my existence."

He took a break and continued.

"I'm so glad dad is dead. Atleast now there is no one here to remind me how much of a failure I am." He laughed darkly.

That did it for me.

I grabbed him by his throat and pushed him against the wall.

"Don't you dare say a word about dad or else I'll rip your throat off." I said applying pressure on his neck.

He started to cough but I didn't care.

Then I noticed something else.

His eyes were bloodshot. He was high.

"Are you high?" I asked getting angrier.

"Why do you even care? You never did. So now's not a time to start caring about me." He chuckled.

What's wrong with him?

How did he get so lost in his life. I don't understand it.

"Mom should have just let me kill myself. Atleast I would have been away from all this drama."

He continued "No one ever gave a shit about me. It was always you. Xavier this and Xavier that. There was no value for Lucas anymore. So I did what I thought was for the best. Atleast that way you guys would have realised that there was another family member" he said with sadness in his voice and I released him.

A pang of guilt hit my chest.

He felt left out.

That's why he tried to kill himself.

But why drugs? Why all of this?

"You need to stop hanging out with those friends of yours. They are toxic for you."

They were indeed.

I've heard a lot of bad things about them.

I've also heard that few of them were even caught by the police but were released as their parents were loaded.

He snorted.

"Well it's a little too late for that. So get the hell out of my room." He snarled at me.

"We are not done talking" I said.

"Oh trust me we are. I don't want to talk to a piece of shit like you so fuck off bro" He said.

I sighed.

He looks tired though. So maybe I will try to talk to him tomorrow.

"We will continue this conversation tomorrow. For now just go to sleep." I said.

I headed for the door.

I was out of his room and then I heard him say "By the way keep that girly of yours to yourself because if I see her alone again I can't promise you what I'll do"

By the time I turned around to grab his head and smash it in the wall he had closed his fucking door.

God I've got to keep my princess away from this dirtbag.

Brother or no brother, Jackie's mine.

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