☾
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Adira's POV

In my house I was welcomed with a fight between my parents already. Home sweet home.

I was excited to tell them about the trip, but now I'm not on the mood for that. Silly of me, I should have known better.

I just went to my room and got ready to sleep, I was incredibly tired, but still I couldn't sleep.

Here we go again.

-☾-

"Hey!" I greeted Jordan as I saw him in the hallway.

"Hey." He said back but he didn't even look at me, he just kept looking at his phone.

"I'm Adira, by the way." I said and this time he looked at me with a frown on his face.

"I know?" He replied with a tone implying that what I was saying was obvious.

"Well you weren't looking at me so I thought maybe you didn't know."

"I know your voice." He said nonchalantly. I was about to reply but he talked again. "Gotta go."

"Okay bye." I said as he started walking away.

He seemed lowkey off, like he really didn't wanna talk with me.

He probably just was in a rush or something, it's nothing.

I attended my classes and fought the urge to sleep in each of them, I barely slept last night. I was supposed to sleep better at home rather than sleeping somewhere else.

"Sup." Roman said as he sat with me in the cafeteria. Blake and Jordan were nowhere to be found.

"Hey Rommy. Where are the other ones?" I looked around hoping to see them close by.

"I have no idea about Jordan, but I know Blake didn't attend today because he isn't feeling good." He said and my heart skipped a beat.

"What does he have?" I asked about Blake, I hope it's nothing serious.

"I think his stomach hurts, he'll be alright, he probably just needs to fart." I chuckled at the last thing he said, I mean he is not lying sometimes it's just that.

Stomach aches are the worst ever, I get so anxious because of it.

"Oh that sucks, I'll text him later to ask how is he doing."

"Yeah hopefully he talks to you because he ignores me whenever I try to talk to him. Like hey, I know I usually say stupid comments but this time I wasn't." Knowing Roman he would say something unintentionally stupid.

Jordan never showed up, but hanging with Roman entertained me enough to keep my mind from overthinking.

After a few more classes the final bell rang indicating we could go home. Finally, I seriously need my bed right now.

I exited the classroom and anxiously looked around looking for Jordan, after lunch I'm not sure if he is here, I mean he doesn't have to drive me home everyday, but he could have told me before if he couldn't.

"Ready?"

I turned around and saw him, my eyes probably wide because I wasn't expecting him.

"Oh hey! I thought you left school." I smiled at him but he just looked at me with a blank look in return.

"I did." He said and I noticed he started slightly fidgeting with his rings. As I was looking at his fingers moving nervously, I noticed he was still using my hair tie around his wrist, just as I was using his bracelet.

I went to grab his hand, but he was faster as he shove both his hands inside his pants pockets.

I don't know if he did it purposely, but still it made my heart drop. He avoided my touch again?

I was so embarrassed I couldn't even think about what to say to stop this awkward moment.

"Um yeah I'm ready." I answered the question he asked like a minute ago.

He didn't say anything and just started walking towards the school exit.

It's been a while since the atmosphere felt this awkward between us, in the morning I thought it was no big deal, but now I can't help it but overthink.

Was it me? Did I do something wrong? Maybe I annoyed him in the trip. Maybe my parents were right and it's impossible to actually sleep next to me. But I saw him sleep? I don't get it.  Maybe I made him uncomfortable some way, maybe he realized I'm really boring. Maybe-

He cleared his throat making my mind shut up for a bit. He was driving, his eyes on the rode but looked at me for a second when I turned to look his way.

"Are you ok?" He asked as he moved the steering wheel with one hand. I looked at his swift movements and I was slightly mesmerized. Have I ever said he has nice hands? He does.

His free hand reached for my hands and that's when I noticed I was shaking. Shit, he noticed, he can probably even feel it now. I have to make it stop.

"Hey?" He called me to catch me attention. "You are shaking." He said, his voice soft as he kept his hand on mine.

"Yeah sorry, I'm kinda cold." I lied while I casually removed my hands from his. Ironic how now I'm the one that don't want him to touch me, but I don't want him to feel my trembling body, specially when I don't know how to control it. And I definitively don't want to explain myself.

He arranged the air conditioner so it was warmer and somehow it actually helped my tremble to ease a little.

"I won't be able to drive you home anymore." He said out of nowhere after a few minutes of silence and my eyes snapped to him.

"That's ok, Danny! Still thank you for all these weeks you did." I said louder than I intended. I would be lying if I said this whole thing isn't making me sad. All this is so sudden and I can't stop wondering what happened.

"Don't call me that."

Oh. This time it was different, it wasn't like that time when I first called him that and he said he hated it. Now I believe he actually hates it.

"Oh ok, sorry." It was getting harder to talk as the lump in my throat grew with every word he said, with every distant act that just added another thing to overthink about.

The thing with me is I would immediately think something is wrong if you even change your tone slightly, but this doesn't feel like a slight change of tone. I don't know what to think.

I don't want to think.

It feels nice to be treated good, all my life I've either been treated bad or decently, decently as you would treat your costumer, decently as you would treat someone you have to deal with even if you don't really want to. Basically, to be treated like a human, the bare minimum, nothing too good, nothing too bad. And that was ok for me, it was better than being treated bad anyways.

But then Jordan came into my life and he actually treats me good, not only decently, it seems like he actually cares. For once someone actually cared, and now I feel like it's being taken away from me.

I better not freaking cry right now, I'm just being dramatic, it's whatever, really. I should stop worrying and being sad, it'll be ok.

Yeah, it's whatever. I swear it is.

I kept repeating myself that it wasn't a big deal whenever my mind threatened to overthink. I don't know what else to do to keep it cool, so I reassure myself as best as I can.

Jordan's POV

Pink cheeks, glossy eyes, shaky hands is what I see whenever I turn to see her.

This is my fucking fault, but I don't have an option. I don't think I'll ever be able to hate her, so hopefully she hates me, hopefully she realizes she should stay away from me. This whole shit would be easier if she hated me, at least I wouldn't hurt her that way.

I was ready to give up my act when I saw her reaction, she was close to having a panic attack and I can't just pull her into my arms. It would ruin it all, so I just sucked it up and remind myself it's better this way.

"Will I see you at school?" She asked as I parked in front of her house. She still seemed so damn sad.

"Sometimes." I said flatly. 

"Ok, see you sometimes then." She tried to smile but her eyes told a different story.

"Adira," She turned around to look at me as she made her way out of my car. I hesitated on what to say for a second, I had to be careful with my words, I didn't want to hurt her even more. I'm the fucking worst at this, whatever this is. "Call me if you ever need anything."

I hope she never has to call me.

-☾-

"Jordan can you shut the fuck up? Seriously, is annoying." Roman said as he entered my living room and sat in the couch in front of me.

"I'm not even fucking talking?" I glared at him, fed up with everything that's going on and his stupid comments aren't helping at all.

"I know, but you look so mad I can already hear you screaming at me, so I wanted to say shut up first." He sipped on a cup with the face of a ginger guy printed all over it. What the fuck is that doing in my apartment?

"What the hell is that?" I put emphasis in the 'that' as I pointed at the cup.

"Just when I thought you couldn't be more of a dick." He stood up and got closer. "It's just a new piercing." He showed me his new septum piercing and rolled his eyes. It's actually cool.
 

"Oh, this is my Ed Sheeran afternoon cup, I usually fill it with tea." I'm not even going to question it more. I don't want to know.

"Where's Blake? I need to talk with him." I changed the topic before Roman could go on about his weird cup.

"Pooping." He instantly said. "He's been fighting for his life in that bathroom for almost 3 hours. Also, where the hell have you been loco? Didn't saw you at school."

"What happened with Blake?" I ignored his last question.

"He has something called diaphragm, I'm not sure, I could barely understand him when he sounded like he was giving birth." He said in a serious tone as he made his way towards the kitchen.

"You mean diarrhea?" I ask with incredulity. How is this guy working with me?

"I don't know, I'm not a doctor. Maybe if you hadn't disappeared all day you would have heard him." He came back to the living room with another cup that actually seemed normal.

"I was busy." I said as vague as possible.

"You are always busy, but still you go to school." Surprisingly, he is right. It's different now.

The bathroom door opened and revealed Blake looking something close to dead. I thought Roman was being dramatic about Blake's condition, but he actually looks like shit.

"Respectfully, you look like shit dude." Roman spoke out loud what I was thinking, but Blake didn't even pay attention to it. Instead he went directly to the guests room that is basically his and Roman's room.

Roman grabbed the other cup and followed Blake to the room. "Drink it all!" Roman said sounding like a mom before closing the door and coming back to the living room.

"I need a favor from you." I start talking but stop because I can't believe I'm actually asking him. I was supposed to tell this to Blake, but I have no other choice right now.

Besides she seems to like spending time with Roman. Maybe more than spending time with me.

"I need you to drive Adira to her house after school from now on."

"Me? Are you seriously trusting me?" He seemed delighted, confused, excited.

"I shouldn't trust you?" I stood up and tilted my head as I got closer to him.

"You should! But you never do, and now you are trusting me with her?"

"I know you care about her too and I guess she is comfortable with you." I stated. "Also I don't have any other fucking option, so yeah I'm trusting you."

He smirked and chuckled a bit.

"Did you just say you care about her?" He was still smirking after he took a sip from his cup and wiggled his eyebrows.

Isn't it obvious?

"Yes." I confidently said, there's no point in denying it. "Now, I don't think it's necessary for me to warn you, is it?"

"No, you don't have to threaten me, I know." He sounded serious for once. Good.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
☾

—————————————————————
AUTHOR'S NOTE
Hey guys thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed even though this was so dramatic. Stay safe! love you all and remember to vote and comment if you want.<3

Also I feel like the song I put in the beginning fits this so well, so I hope you like it.

-ARV
Published: June 7th 2022