I laid wide awake the next morning staring up at the ring on my fourth finger. It was a band with shimmering embedded diamonds with a slightly larger one on top in the middle. I couldn't stop looking at it, and thinking that I would have to give it back to him soon.
Just when it was starting to really sink in, and not feel so weird, It was time to give up and go our separate ways. Despite that, I rolled over with this dopey smile on my face and grabbed my phone off the charger.
Most of my Saturday morning consisted of lying in bed and daydreaming about nothing in particular and listening to The Beatles.
I was in a great mood and I couldn't pin-point exactly why. I just knew that odd enough I was anxious to see Jamie again. It had only been a small amount of time with him in my life and already it seemed like it'd be weird without him in.
I dialed his number hoping I wasn't being too direct and he picked up right away surprising me. "Wow that was quick!" I giggled. I was in such a good mood, even though my gut kept telling me I shouldn't.
I shouldn't be happy to hear his voice, to think of him. I hardly knew him, and he wanted rid of me. As soon as the papers could be filed and the court was attended. My smile was slowly fading.
"What was?" He laughed. Probably at me for giggling. I wonder why I had. I never giggled. It always felt like I wasn't girly enough or cute enough for a giggle to work for me. I suddenly wished I hadn't.
"Picking up the phone." I said in a calmer tone now that I'd collected myself and when I didn't say anything further he spoke up on the other end.
"What are you doing?"
"Um, just sitting at home." I was chewing on my thumb nail feeling my nerves rise. I knew this wouldn't end well and yet I still wanted to see him. "Uh, Jamie."
"Yeah?"
"Would you want to maybe, I don't know, uh, hang out today."
"I can't..." he said but I cut him off.
"Oh, okay. That's okay. I, uh..." I felt like a fool getting all excited to see him. I should have known. He said was was too young. Maybe if I was a couple years older...
He chuckled. "I can't right now. I'm waiting on my meeting to start."
"You have meetings?"
"Well, it's technically lunch with my dad. He insists on our visits being more business like. We have to talk over some things..." He trailed off and I could hear a man in the background ask him something. Jamie's voice seeked me out anyways. "Peyton, you still there?"
"Yup." I guess this really was all over with. I knew it was for the best. It had to be. Nothing else made sense. At least I wanted to believe that.

There was nothing I could do anyways. I sort of liked Jamie and I'd have to ignore that feeling and just push forward. I looked at the ring and tried not to feel down.
It wouldn't be so hard if sometimes he didn't give me a glimmer of hope. Holding my hands and being so nice to me.
"Listen I have to go but I'll come get you when I'm done. Okay?"
"Okay." I tried my best to sound chipper.
"Okay." He said. "Wish me luck."
"Good luck!"
He slightly chuckled and then hung up.
I laid in bed being glum until mom banged on the door, and told me I needed to get my butt up. She was one of those people that was restless, and always had to be moving around. She always thought that sleeping in, and lying around was a waste of precious time, but heck I figured if I enjoyed it that was all that counted.
"I have a list of chores." Mom said the moment I came down stairs and joined her in the small yellow kitchen of ours.
I groaned and plopped down in a wooden chair and scanned the list. Everything from laundry to dusting the furniture.
"Mom, I have plans today." Well, I'd never really said that before.
She turned to look at me with her favorite coffee mug with the hugging pug dogs on it and scowled. "Where do you think you're going?"
"Out with a friend."
"Rain?"
"No." I admitted. I should have said yes, but it was too late.
"Is it that boy?" She hastily tucked a stray dark brunette hair behind her ear and looked at me.
"If you mean Jamie, then yes. He's my friend, mom." She didn't need to know any more than that. Ever.
"I don't know if I like you seeing that boy very much. Plus I said you're grounded remember?"
"It's not up to you anyways, I like Jamie..." I trailed off.
She didn't say much after that. She got up with her bug and sort of smiled. "Okay, just this once." Then told me to get that dang chore list finished, and went into the other room to watch soap operas.
Was she just glad to hear I liked someone? She swore I hated people because I only had a couple friends. Well, two friends, and they were dating so it kind of left me a third wheel or alone a lot.
My heart was thundering in my ears, banging around in my chest. It was louder than my gloomy thoughts and the knot in my stomach telling me to give up on my delusional crush. I was being so defensive.
"So why did you call me over here again?" Rain said walking into my room. Three hours had passed since I talked with my mom, and luckily I finished the chores just before Rain got here.
"I," I said and hurried over to urge her in my room so I could shut the door. She sat down on my unmade bed and looked up at me. "Rain, I think I like Jamie."
"What do you mean?"
"I think I like like him. I don't know. I just feel so aww I don't even know how to describe it. I just feel it when I'm with him and when I'm not, and when I think of him. I know it sounds crazy because we haven't known each other that long but I don't know..." I was actually smiling.
"So you're trying to tell me that you think you like your husband?" She raised an eyebrow.
I just stared at her and burst out into laughter. It wasn't that funny really but I was so on end with this energy that I felt extremely bizarre. "I guess that does sound pretty weird."
She shrugged. "I'd be careful. This guy came out of nowhere and now you're married."
"Maybe it's fate?"
"Maybe, but we're only seventeen. We don't need to be tied down. Ya know?"
"What about you and Michael? Are you saying if he asked you to marry him you wouldn't be happy?"
"I don't know." She avoided it. I wonder if her and Michael were okay. I haven't seen him much at school lately, and she didn't seem like she wanted to talk about it.
"Well, we haven't really talked about the marriage thing that much." I admitted. Now that I thought about it, Jamie was trying to figure out how to get us out of this marriage still. I couldn't blame him. I really couldn't, just the other day I thought it was crazy myself.
Besides, he was in a meeting with his dad to get this all sorted. I plopped on the bed and buried my face in my pillows. I suddenly wish I never invited my best friend over. She could be so blunt and negative it hurt your feelings sometimes.
"Peyton," She patted me on my back. "I'm just looking out for you. I don't want this guy to hurt you."
That was typical and I loved her for caring but I just needed someone to be there to urge me on, because honestly I was all mixed up right now. It felt right to like him, but she made me feel like maybe I could be wrong. Maybe it really was just plain out weird instead of fate.
"Hey, look on the bright side of things. At least your mom won't be up your butt for a while tonight." She didn't seem completely thrilled. I guess it was mostly because she had to go have mother-daughter bonding tonight, like her mom requested they do every Saturday night for the last seventeen years of her life.
I sure was glad that my mom didn't want to spend that much quality time together. Instead my mom went out every weekend with her boyfriend Leonard. He was a weird guy, a piano teacher that had tribal tattoos with little comic like cartoons trailing. He also had an awkwardness about him that repelled people for miles, but yet somehow my mom liked him.
And Rain didn't believe in fate.
"Has she left yet?" I mumbled into my pillow.
"She was getting ready to go out the door when I came in." She admitted. I was glad she understood me.
I knew she got up to her feet when the space beside me got lighter. "I should get going. I was on my way to meet my mom when you called."
"I'm sorry." I glanced up at her. She was looking out my curtains.
"Don't be. It's okay. You know I love ya." She looked at me now. "Anyways, It looks like your husband is here."
I think she was getting a kick out of calling him that.
I nearly tumbled running down the hall slipping on the rug at the top of the stairs, and grabbing onto the railing. Rain laughed and passed me up. I staggered down the stairs, and made it to the front door as Rain went out and Jamie was walking up the porch steps. I stood in the doorway looking at him.
He was wearing dark dress pants and a white button down shirt with a black tie. He looked so formal it surprised me and made me evaluate myself. I was wearing purple plaid pajama pants with a gray camisole.
I folded my arms over my chest as he stood before me. "I'm sorry it took me so long to get here." He said and those green eyes of his made me melt on the inside. It was crazy how fast I'd started to like him, but now it just felt overflowing.
"I understand." I smiled trying to ignore the pegging knot of gloominess in my gut. "Your meeting probably took long, right?"
"Not exactly. Dad was in a hurry to go somewhere. He said I'd be hearing from our lawyer soon and when I left I ran into Hollie."
"Oh," I could hear how much I didn't like that in my voice. But I couldn't be jealous, he was only my friend, but he was also my husband so technically I could. I was kind of confusing myself... "How'd that, um, go?"
"Okay. She wasn't mad. I wasn't mad. We talked for a few minutes and that was about it. Mostly I was stuck in traffic." He shrugged. "Anyways, I figured we could go get coffee or something."
"Coffee? Is that what twenty-something year olds do?"
He cracked a smile at me with my hand on my hip. "I suppose so."
"I'll go get dressed real quick." I said, and before he could say anything I ran back up the stairs and pulled on a grey pair of jeans and a beige blouse with black polka dots. The only somewhat adult like shirt I seemed to own and it was actually Rains.
Maybe I really did need to go shopping with her.