AVERY

Just as the words leave my mouth, Dylan stills. Completely stiffens. His eyes remain fixed at me, unblinking. I am pretty sure he stopped breathing. All the colours drain off his face within seconds. He looks pale as if he is about to lose consciousness. I don't move either. I let him soak in the fact that I know.

"What?" His voice comes out in a hoarse whisper and let's go of my hand. I almost miss what he says above the rattling noise of rain. He blinks rapidly, gaining back his consciousness.

"You got married because of your mother, right?"

"How...how did you know?" He manages to say.

"Because she said, Dylan. She told me about her sickness and why she wants to see you get settled! One can easily figure out the rest!" I exclaim.

He lets out a hefty breath as I see relief flooding through his eyes. His body relaxes heavily then he straightens up. He gains back his composure with the previous guarded expression back. "Why didn't you tell me about your mother's health?!" I cry.

He removes his eyes from mine, clenching his jaw. "It's not a big deal, Avery. Stay out of it, " he warns and begins to turn around. I swiftly move to stand in front of him, blocking his way.

"Of course it is!" I snap. "Dylan you are lying to her. Do you realize that? You are playing with her feelings! You want her to believe in a lie?!"

"This. Doesn't. Concern. You, " he says in a warning tone and he is absolutely, wrong to think I would back off, afraid of him.

I cross my arms against my chest and lift my chin. "Oh really? You think so? 'Cause as much as my memory persists, I remember getting married to you."

"And as much as I remember, this marriage has a deal which clearly states you can't ask me the reason!"

"I agree to your stupid contract, marry you without knowing shit about you and you don't think I deserved to know such an important thing about your mother?!"

"Why would I tell? So that you can make me feel pathetic?! So that you can tell me how wrong I am every chance you get?! Moreover, I don't want your pity." He snaps, catching me off-guard with his words. Why would he think that?

"I would never do that. Never." I shake my head and a small step towards him. I reach for his head and say softly, "I understand what you're feeling." The tears begin to make their presence again as my throat closes up.

"No, you don't." He snatches his hand away and raises his voice. "You can never understand. You never had to see someone you love die!" His words make me freeze on my spot. My whole body turns still. I stare blankly at his face. He keeps glaring at me, clenching his jaw until unable to remain straight anymore, my knees shake and I stumble back.

Quicky, I balance myself and lookup. His expression changes instantly from angry to horrified. His eyes widen and his lips part slowly. He realised what he just said...

"Avery-"

"No, stop. Please. Not a word!" I manage to whisper these words before I turn towards the stairs and run. Everything starts flashing under my eyelid. All my nightmares. Everything.

I hear Dylan calling my name. I hear his footsteps faint behind me, but I don't stop. Not until I am inside my room. Behind the wooden door keeping me locked up from the world.

I let go of my purse, it falls on the ground beside my feet. I close my eyes and rest of the back of my head against the wood. Warm tears flow down my cheeks. Flashbacks of every single thing I try not to remember starts coming back, now that I'm alone.

I fall on my knees to the ground, my body shuddering with sobs. I wouldn't have broken down this bad if it wasn't for the fact that I just got to know that Dylan is seeing his mother die, slowly in front of him. It kills me to think that he has to see his mother approach death every day. And he clearly, loves his mother so much so that he went up to the extent of marrying some stranger for her happiness.

I can understand that his outburst was because he is stressed. But it's just too much for me to take. I stopped crying in front of anyone a long time ago. I never wanted to be vulnerable in front of anyone, ever. I could let myself get emotional to some extent but there was no way I would let myself break down in front of anyone.

Lifting myself off the ground, I walk into the bathroom and turn on the shower. Peeling off the slack, I step under the warm water. My tears have stopped but my chest still feels heavy. I try to focus on the water droplets touching my shoulder and the steam that has started to build around me.

I take my good, sweet time to wash off myself. I refuse to let any thought into my mind. I don't let my brain picture the images I am running from. I am too exhausted to take any more of that.

I put on a pair of PJs and a blue pullover when I get back to the room after my long hot shower. Bear is on the window seat, crawled up into a ball, sleeping peacefully. Without wasting any more time, I lay down on the bed and pull the covers on myself. Closing my eyes, I let the exhaustion take-up and I feel my body giving up to sleep.

***

I hold his hand tight, while they carry him to the emergency room. "Ma'am, please stay out here, " the nurse stops me and closes the door. I stare at the white closed door in front of me. My whole body is shaking with fear. I bring my hand in front of my face to find it covered with deep red blood...Marc's.

I sit up gasping for breath. It's a regular thing but still as terrifying as the first time. Only from the second time, I didn't have anyone to lose only memories of everything I lost. Turning my head to the left, I see the moon, peeking through the bamboo trees cover outside the large window. The rain has stopped. All I'm surrounded by right now is the silence of the night.

The faint moonlight entering the room is lighting up the room. Bear is still in his previous position lying on one side of the purple velvet-covered window seat. Removing the covers of my legs, I step down and slip into my slippers. I slowly make my way across the room to the window seat and sit down at one end, tucking my legs under my body. Looking out of the window, I stare at the swaying bamboo leaves and the moon, peeking from behind.

I am focused outside the window when I hear the sound of the doorknob turning. I turn my head around at the same time when the door opens slightly and Dylan sticks his head in. His eyebrows raise as his eyes fall on me. Clearly, he didn't expect me to be awake. Neither did I expect him to be sneaking into my room so late at night.