I knew I must have looked absolutely ridiculous. Maybe like some girl practicing her best smile for picture day, or some nerd giving his graduation speech. All I know, was that I wasn't going into this situation unprepared.

As Chemistry threatened to overload my brain, my thoughts began to drift back to this afternoon. I still couldn't believe I'd been initiated into the school's drug chain in under an hour and a half. Not only had I been initiated, but I had worked my way up to Beta with one well-placed lie. If I knew my luck as well as I thought I did, that would be my only well-placed lie.

The meeting next week with this prestigious senior had shoved its way to the forefront of my mind- it was the only thing I could think about! So, I'd been standing in front of my mirror rehearsing exactly what I'd say to the guy. Don't call me pathetic, call me absolutely scared out of my mind.

"So, uh, I hear you've got the good stuff," I tried, holding my head up high like I knew what I was talking about. Instead, I looked like some kind of distraught giraffe.

Time to change tactics.

"You up for a deal?" I asked suspiciously. "I'll help you, you help me?" Dammit, I sounded like some poorly paid actor on a TV movie!

Maybe I should just tell him straight up.

"The underclassmen dealers want to do a hook up with you- ecstasy. Name your price, negotiations, whatever the hell it takes." Well, that's a good way to get punched in the-

"Just go to your room, Penny!" I heard a voice bellow from downstairs. Cooper? What in the world had Penny done to make him that mad?

"It's not even that big of a deal, Cooper! We were just taking a break! That's it!" She's arguing with him?? Penny? The goody two shoes?

Wait, scratch that. Recently Perfect Penny had turned into Petulant, Whiny, Bitchy Penny. It shouldn't surprise me that she's arguing with him.

"I said go!" Cooper reiterated. I could just barely make out his words; he'd taken on his "I'm really angry and you better not cross me" tone. Even Penny knew better than to argue with that.

Her footsteps pounded on the stairs and past my closed door. Some hissy fit.

I turned back to the mirror and faced my reflection with as much confidence as I could muster. The more I sounded like I knew what I was doing, the better off this meeting was going to turn out. That was the problem though- I have no idea what I'm doing!

One millionth time's the charm!

"Us underclassmen want some better stuff. If you supply it, we'll give you half profit... and anything else you want." That was better. I wasn't so sure about the "anything else" part; there were so many different things that could entail.

"You wanna-" I started, but then all of a sudden my reflection was gone. Somebody had opened my door, thus obscuring the mirror on the back of it.

"What do you want?" I muttered, trying to keep from blushing- futile. Penny stood there, looking both haughty and slightly amused.

"Who are you talking to, Owen?" she asked, sneering at me mockingly.

"Not you," I said, turning away from my door and plopping in my desk chair, homework sprawled in front of me.

My sister rolled her eyes and walked further into the room. "What's your problem lately, huh? You're not still pissy over the whole soccer thing, are you?"

Talk about salt in the open wound. Yes, I was still piss- erm, upset about the "whole soccer thing"!

"No. You're not still pissy over the whole "my family hates me and doesn't want me" thing, are you?" Two can play this game, sis.

"You're such a dick, Owen!" she exclaimed, balling her hands into fists.

"Just get out, Penny." She turned and left the room without another word.

Thank God. Finally, some peace!

I walked back up to my mirror. I'd try one last time, then give it a rest. My homework really did need to get done, and I didn't want to test Dana further today, anyhow.

"Ecstasy- that's what we want. What do you want for it? I promise you'll get maximum profit cuts." I sounded like a garage sale enthusiast or a bidder on Ebay- sell me your junk at the best price!

Maybe I should back out while I still can; my reputation's already in shambles, anyway.

Once again, my door was swung open to reveal my increasingly-annoying little sibling.

"How many times do I have to tell you to leave me-"

"What in the hell are you doing talking about ecstasy, Owen?" she asked, shutting my door quietly behind her. Her voice wasn't much above a whisper, but I shushed her harshly anyway. If our brothers got even the slightest hint that I had anything to do with drugs- using, selling, even thinking about them- I was dead where I stood.

"I'm trying out for the school play," I blurted out, immediately chastising myself internally. All of the stupid excuses, I had to go with that one? I wasn't even sure our school had a theater department!

"Just stop, Owen. I'm not gonna tell Ben or Dana or even Cooper. I just want to know what you're doing even talking about... drugs." She said it like a curse word, something forbidden and never to be heard out loud. For our family, it was.

Fighting or not, I couldn't lie to Penny. She of all people understands me the most. Hopefully that hasn't changed.

I slumped against my bed, defeated. "I'm gonna deal ecstasy to the underclassmen. I've got a meeting with some senior in a few days; I was... practicing."

"Owen, what the hell?" she muttered, swiping her hand tiredly over her face. She'd looked so exhausted these past few weeks.

I stayed silent, looking at my bedspread in shame. This was a complete disgrace to everything our family was, but she didn't understand! She didn't understand this was my last chance to make friends before my social life hit rock bottom! How could she understand, when she was the social butterfly that she was? I picked at a stray thread and waited for my sister to disown me.

Instead, her voice was gentle as she placed her hand on the top of my bowed head. "How did you get twisted into this mess?"

In that moment, I knew that no amount of fighting could sever the bond between my sister and I. Penny knew I would never voluntarily sell drugs, or even begin to contemplate the notion in the first place. She knew it was something I inevitably could not get out of. I needed her no matter how bitchy she had gotten.

"Riley. He was going to humiliate me in front of everybody if I didn't prove myself to him. So I said I'd done ecstasy before," I told her, bumping the heel of my foot lightly against the hardwood floors.

"Why?" was all she asked, sitting next to me and wrapping her arms tentatively around my still form. I missed her so much.

"I thought it'd get him off my back... but it didn't. Now I'm his second-in-command in the 'Willow Academy Deal or No Deal'." My voice was sarcastic, but only because it was so close to breaking.

"Owen... you have to find a way out of this," she said gently, hunching down to look into my eyes.

"I can't! I'm caught in it, and I just have to deal with it, okay?" I stood up in exasperation, scraping my fingers roughly through my hair. I never asked for so much drama; it just seemed to find me.

"Please," was all she said, standing up and moving closer to me. "Please," she repeated.

I sighed heavily, dropping my arms like they weighed a thousand tons. "I'll try. But I make no promises."

Penny moved to my door again, hand resting on the knob as she looked back at me. "That's all I ask." She turned the knob slowly, almost reluctantly, and walked out into the hallway. My sister turned around, looking like she wanted to say something, but held back. "Pasta for dinner," she told me, and retreated quickly back to her room.

Great. Another family dinner.